


Princess Peach's Adventures Into Craigslist

by JessAlmasy



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-04-01 01:38:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 110,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4001035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessAlmasy/pseuds/JessAlmasy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just when Kurt thinks his life can't get more complicated, Sebastian Smythe gets dropped onto his doorstep. With graduation looming, he has to figure out how to live his life, survive the summer and not end up on the news. Aka: The Time Burt Hummel Let a Meerkat in The House.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, if I did, Klaine would have ended no later than season 4... preferably 2.
> 
> Rated for future chapters.
> 
> This is actually the first fic I've ever written, but I've been reading them for 13-14 years. Just a fair warning, this is going to be filled to the brim with every cliché that I love about Kurtbastian. This story is also very loosely based on the relationships I had with my brother's friends. I know from first hand experience that even the toughest, most popular guys need someone safe to cry to. My only beta has been my amazing husband who has put up with me for the past month while I wrote this, so there will be errors, please forgive them. Let me know if we missed something big!
> 
> The story starts during Season 3 Episode 20, Props. I tried to keep the timeline straight, but I took some liberties. It will be mostly canon, in past and future, but with obvious 'fixes'. I am not a Klaine fan. I liked Blaine, but not with Kurt and in the later seasons he just got very whiny. I've already finished writing, I waited to post until I was done, in case I didn't finish it. There are too many stories I've loved that remain incomplete and that annoys me greatly. So, I'll post the rest in the next few days. It's uh... over 100k. Sorry, lol.
> 
> Deathbycitrus-cd drew a picture for Princess Peach's! (I'm still squeeing over it!)  
> http://deathbycitrus-cd.deviantart.com/art/Princess-Peach-s-Adventures-into-Craigslist-555387916

* * *

 

 

 

[Kurt]

Kurt is bored. And tired. And a little annoyed. It's bad enough that he has to come with his dad to these stupid political functions, smile and nod, and talk to people he knows would strip him of most of his human rights just because he's gay, but on top of it all, tonight he's stuck listening to Rachel go on and on about her NYADA audition. She's 'happy for him, of course!' but she's still so upset about her own audition that she's now all but stalking the poor Ms. Carmen Tibideaux. His sympathy only goes so far, and that limit was passed 45 minutes and three convoluted rants ago.

Now, as unfair as it probably is, he stands and sips his drink, blaming Sam for everything. If it wasn't one of his family weekends he could be here, buffering him from the hot mess that is Rachel Berry. But no, thanks to Sam and the state of Kentucky, he is buffer free and the only break he gets from dealing with her obsessive plans are to shake hands and small talk with people who wouldn't piss on him to put out a fire. _Granted, Sam should be home by now, but that's not helpful since he was gone when we left._

He could walk back over to his father, and try to join the friendly conversation he's been having with Carole and some tall man with black hair that he doesn't know, but sadly Rachel would just follow him. _Damn Finn and his bathroom breaks. You're not fooling anyone Finn Hudson. You're the one that wants to marry the harpy, the least you could do is not hide in the bathroom and stick me with her._

Seeing his dad be joined by yet another, _probably more interesting than Rachel_ , person, Kurt is about to finally lose it on the clueless diva when he's waved over by Carole and has a reasonable excuse to escape the conversation. Unfortunately, he's only about half way over when the new man turns and Kurt recognizes the bastard he's about to be introduced to. Already having been spotted by the group, he has no choice but to swallow his annoyance and continue, still being chattered to. _Does the girl never take a breath?_

Her verbal vomit finally ceases as they approach Burt but that's really a small consolation prize for having to see that smirk again.

"Kurt, Rachel, this is Stephan Smythe, and his son Sebastian. Stephan, this is my son Kurt and my step-son's fiancé, Rachel Berry."

"We've met actually." Sebastian can't even be bothered to drop the smarmy smirk as he says this. "I go to Dalton, so we all met through Blaine."

Despite his father's worried glance, the name barely causes a clench in Kurt's stomach, hardly the breath-stealing punch it was before.

"Ah, well good. I'm glad you guys already know each other. Your dad has been very helpful to me in getting used to all the political stuff. I definitely needed a crash course." Burt replies, smiling widely at Sebastian. Thankfully, before he can form a response, Finn finally rejoins the group.

"Hey! What'd I miss?"

"At least 25 minutes of plotting and planning from your crazy wife-to-be, which I'll be thanking you for later, and the introduction of Stephan Smythe. I'm sure you remember Sebastian." Kurt manages to get all of this out without breaking his glare at Finn or raising his voice, a new personal best for the night.

"Right! Sebastian! How're the warblers?"

"They're fine." Sebastian says tersely.

"Oh yeah! You guys didn't make it to nationals, are you still having practices? Even if there's no competition you guys still meet up right?"

Kurt can't decide if he should laugh at Finn's obliviousness or smirk at Sebastian's impotent rage. Kurt's guessing it's not often that Sebastian has to censor himself, but standing next to his father at a high class dinner seems one of those rare times. Apparently knowing his son fairly well, Stephan takes that opportunity to excuse themselves and walk away, before there can be bloodshed.

Rachel opens her mouth, no doubt about to continue with her plan for the domination of New York, and Kurt jumps in to ask,

"So, can we blow this popsicle stand yet? It **is** actually a school night for those of us that are still chained to such institutions."

"Good point, I guess we've done all the damage we can here, lets make our way out." Burt seems almost as relieved as Kurt to finally be leaving. Trying to change things for the better is one thing, strapping on a three-piece-suit and eating rubber chicken while watching your son make faces like he's having bamboo shoots stuck under his nails is another.

They all pile into Kurt's Navigator, the only car any of them own that can comfortably fit everyone, and Kurt visibly twitches at having to let anyone else, even his father, drive his baby.

After dropping Rachel off at home, the Hudmels finally arrive home. Shutting himself in his room to take off his overly formal attire, Kurt hears the shower going in the shared bathroom. Knowing he doesn't have long, he hurries to gather his toiletries, hoping to beat Finn after Sam steps out. Sharing a bathroom with two other teenage boys is a bit like Game of Thrones, nothing is safe and after a night like tonight he's willing to sacrifice his first born son to get in there before Finn.

Hearing his door unlock before theirs, Kurt smirks at having Sam on his side, already opening the door before Sam manages to escape back into their room. Finn pouts as Kurt shuts the door in his face, locking it just to be sure, because like Game of Thrones, assuming family won't betray you is a rookie mistake.

After speeding through his shower, because he's not **that** heartless, Kurt retreats back into his room to start his nightly skin care routine. Finally, after picking out tomorrow's outfit, he grabs his phone off the vanity and crawls into bed. As he's plugging in his phone and setting it to charge, his heart clenches at the notification, '1 missed call from Blaine'. Knowing it's too late to call back and that he wouldn't even if it wasn't, he flops back in bed and glares at the ceiling, hoping sleep comes soon.

* * *

 

Kurt knows, in some part of his brain, that this isn't really happening. Can't be happening, not again. He's standing in the choir room, surrounded by friends that are watching him carefully, expecting some form of apology through song. Meanwhile Blaine is still sitting there, in the back row of chairs, glaring at the floor with his arms crossed. After his heart to heart with his dad, Kurt had decided to sing 'You Were Loved' for his glee assignment this week. Instead of a simple loving apology like 'I am Nothing', he decided to sing a song about dreams for the future and looking back on a relationship that was everything you needed it to be.

If he hit the part about trusting someone a bit too hard, well that was understandable, he was still pretty upset at being called a cheater just because he didn't actively stop Chandler from saying inappropriate things via text. Considering the things he'd heard Sebastian say to Blaine's face without Blaine ever telling him to stop, he's more outraged at the hypocrisy than guilty about the "cheating". It's only as he's singing the end of the song that he realizes the path he's singing about not walking alone doesn't necessarily have to be walked by the two of them. By the end they are both in tears.

Suddenly, they are sitting in Miss Pillsbury's office for their "couples counseling". When Blaine admits "Okay. Well, uh, first, Kurt has been texting this guy, and I got really upset. Although, a while back, I was sort of doing the same thing." Kurt finds himself unable to hold back,

"So, you **do** admit that what you did was the same! In fact, I think it's worse! Sebastian would come on to you **to your face** and you never once told him to stop, or agree to stop talking to him. You told him you had a boyfriend, and he told you he didn't care! And sure, when you told me all these things, you were trying to act offended but I'm not stupid Blaine, I could tell how flattered you were. So yeah, when I met Chandler and he was nice to me, and complimented me, I was flattered. I never get positive feedback on my clothes, which is fine, we live in Ohio, but I have to admit, it was a feeling I don't get from you! The only times you comment on what I'm wearing are times like prom last year when you tell me to tone it down. I get that your trying to look out for me, and make me fit in a bit more, and maybe that's the blazers of Dalton rearing their atrocious heads, but we're not in Dalton anymore! I like the way I dress and I don't like being made to feel like how I dress is wrong, especially from my boyfriend!"

A few seconds of shocked silence follow, Kurt breathing heavily and unsure about what else to say, or if he should even bother. Finally Blaine recovers enough to say,

"I'm sorry that you didn't feel like you were getting the support from me that you needed. I really didn't mean to make you feel like I don't approve of the way you dress! That's not it at all, I love your clothes, I just worry about what will happen if the wrong caveman in this town sees you in one of your more **out there** looks."

"Okay, I get it. I can understand how that might make you nervous, but I'm not going to change the way I dress or act because of unevolved neanderthals. It would be nice to hear something positive every now and then."

"I can work on that."

Kurt smiles tentatively, "Okay, so since we're supposed to be brutally honest, do you have a complaint?"

Blaine looks hesitant but eventually speaks up, "It seems like the only thing we talk about is New York. I get that you're excited, but all we talk about is what song you're gonna sing for NYADA, what outfit to wear on your callback, and how amazing New York is going to be. It's like you can't wait to get out of here... how is that supposed to make me feel? In a few months, you're gonna be gone. With this brand-new life, these brand-new friends, brand-new everything, and I'm gonna be right here. By myself. You're right. I have been distant. And I'm sorry. But I'm just trying to practice what life is going to be like without you."

Kurt sits up a little straighter and turns slightly toward Blaine. Searching his face for a few seconds, Kurt finally manages to organize his thoughts.

"I've been dreaming of New York for a long time. I want to be somewhere I fit in, that I won't feel like I'm an outsider. I can't picture my life staying here... I'd die here. I know you don't actually want me to stick around here just for you, even at your most diva, you would never expect that. And I'm sorry if I've made you feel like I won't be just as torn up about being apart from you. Even if I go to a new school and make new friends, they're never going to mean to me what my friends now do. The relationships I have now, especially with you, are irreplaceable.

"I know that you're used to being the center of attention, ever since Blaine and the Pips, you've been the focus, and I'm sorry that things are changing now, but none of this makes up for what you did in glee. It wasn't right, or okay. You called me a cheater, and told me to pack my bags and leave, in front of all our friends, and our teacher for crying out loud! Then you tell me the reason you did it was because you were worried about me leaving? That doesn't even make sense Blaine! It was embarrassing and hurtful! And then you turn around and admit that you did the same thing! With the boy that almost blinded you! And while I'm glad that you've realized that it wasn't fair, it's private! Unlike most of the idiots I call friends, I don't want to drag my problems out in song, in front of everyone. I don't want my relationship problems aired just for the sake of getting a chance to bob my head around and make hand gestures! So now, everyone thinks I cheated on you, and will continue to think so, because instead of singing another fracking song about it, I just want to put it behind us, but none of that makes what you did okay!"

Once again breathing heavily, Kurt stands up. "I'm sorry, I need to take a break, I can't really handle this at the moment, I'm going to say something I don't want to say, so I'm just going to go. We can talk about this later." Kurt gets up and walks stiffly from the room, not looking back.

* * *

 

Kurt shoots up in bed, running a hand through his hair and sighing heavily. Groaning slightly, Kurt gets up and goes downstairs to make himself warm milk. He'd hoped the dreams would stop if enough time had passed. Clearly he still wasn't over it. Thinking back on the days that followed his performance of 'You Were Loved', Kurt still can't find it in himself to regret his choices, but that doesn't make it any easier not having Blaine in his life at the moment. Two days after their fight in Miss Pillsbury's office, Kurt had met Blaine at the Lima Bean, hoping to get their talk over with before a certain meerkat with stalking tendencies could show up.

When Blaine finally did come in, after talking about all of the things they were feeling in the aftermath of their fight, they agreed to break up. Kurt was convinced that having that many problems before he'd even left, meant there wasn't enough trust to make it through a lengthy long distance romance. Kurt had pointed out that he didn't want to be standing in Central Park six months later, hearing about how alone Blaine felt, how Kurt wasn't there for him, because he literally couldn't be there. Kurt had decided to end it before their relationship became so toxic the friendship couldn't be saved. Knowing that he made the right decision and not regretting that the choice had to be made doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't stop him from wishing he and Blaine could skip the awkward 'just friends now' period that follows after a break up. He really just wants one of his closest friends back, he misses him.

 

Finishing his milk, Kurt rinses his cup and heads back to bed, hoping for a few more hours of sleep before he has to wake up and deal with the daily migraine that is high school. One more month. One more and he'll finally be able to put the red and white decorated halls behind him, and start preparing for his new life in New York.

* * *

 

Kurt wakes up again before the sun is even up. Checking the alarm clock tells him it's not quite five in the morning. Despite his best attempts at rolling over and hiding under his pillow, Kurt just can't fall back asleep. Finally admitting defeat, he gets up and starts his morning routine. After dressing and fixing his hair, he heads downstairs. As he enters the kitchen though, he realizes that the one upside to being up this early is that he has plenty of time to go to the Lima Bean for his favored mocha, instead of settling for the coffee at home. Running back upstairs to grab his keys and school bag, he makes a quick trip into Finn's room to leave a note telling him and Sam to be ready to go as usual, and that he'll grab them each a drink while he's out.

As he's ordering their coffees, Kurt gets a sudden inspiration and asks for a job application. _Hey, maybe I can manage to turn this break up into a good thing. I'll have plenty of free time after nationals, with no boyfriend and no glee, might as well start saving up for New York._ He's luckily just managed to tuck away the application when he sees Sebastian walk in. Closing his eyes and blowing out a breath slowly, Kurt prepares for the onslaught that is about to happen. Sebastian may have decided to play at nice to Blaine and Dave but Kurt knows very well that no such changes have been made in his own interactions with the smirking asshole currently strutting toward him.

"Hey Kurt! We've just got to stop meeting like this. It seems you're everywhere lately!"

"Well, we probably wouldn't run into each other so often if you didn't have that cot set up in the alley behind the dumpsters, it's the only explanation for why you're always here. Seriously, don't the owners mind the stench of cheap wine and desperation when they take out the trash?" Kurt tosses at him, glaring at the barista, urging her silently to _Please hurry the fuck up!_

"Now that's hardly friendly Kurt. I didn't even make any disparaging comments about your clothes today. And I went to so much effort to hold back!" Ignoring the eye roll and glare aimed at him, Sebastian continues, "I was actually just on my way back to Dalton. So, if you're here, where's Blaine? You could have at least brought him with you to give people a distraction from the assault your wardrobe is to the eyes. With him around, no one's looking at you, no matter how stupid you look."

"What lovely sentiments, I'll be sure to pass them along. Sadly, I'm only here for morning coffee. I need the caffeine to help recover from the tedious conversations I endured last night."

"Oh, I don't know, those people weren't that bad. No one interesting enough to meet in the bathroom of course, but seeing you there would have killed the mood instantly anyway."

Kurt scoffs, clearly unimpressed, "So you have no problem making small talk and smiling prettily while talking to people that have absolutely no respect for you as a person and who judge you for who you choose to sleep with?"

"I'm doing it right now aren't I?" Sebastian gives Kurt a very pointed look.

"Ugh, that's hardly the same. I have no respect for you because of **who** you sleep with. Clearly I have no problem with gay people, self-hating homophobia just confuses me. It's the whorish nature of actively trying to steal boyfriends that I have a problem with. You want to go around sleeping with as many people as you can to hide from feelings, that's your business, and it'd be a bit hypocritical of me to judge you for it. It's the whole, 'I'm going to sleep with your man and send you cell phone pictures' attitude I have a problem with." Kurt finally hears his order called up and without waiting for Sebastian's response, grabs the tray of drinks and heads for the door. As he's stepping through it, he hears a snarky,

"Lovely to see you, as always Kurt!"

* * *

 

Pulling up in front of the house, Kurt sends Finn a text that he's outside. While he's waiting for them to grab their stuff, he sends off another text,

_**To David: So, I ran into Sebby dearest at TLB, had a wonderful chat, made me think of you.** _

He doesn't expect a response so quickly, but within two minutes he hears the chime,

_From David: shit, that's not good news, whatd he say?_

_**To David: Something I said actually, abt self-hating homophobes, made me remember the good ol' days.** _

_From David: Ur the most fuct up person I know Fancy._

_**To David: Oh come on, that can't be true. You're quasi-friends with Sebastian Smythe, surely he's got more issues than I do?** _

_From David: It's closer than u think._

He's snorting to himself and composing a response as Sam opens the car door, getting there first earning him the front seat. Finn comes out shortly after, opening the door just as Kurt hears the chime again,

_**To David: I'm highly offended that you think I'm as bad as Sebastian. Sadly we're off to school now, have a good day, don't do anything I wouldn't do.** _

_From David: holy shit, there's something u wouldn't do?! =O have fun Fancy_

Putting his phone away, he waits for Sam to pass back Finn's coffee before pulling away. Kurt taps the steering wheel as he drives, waiting for the inevitable freak out from Finn, wondering how long it will take him to remember he's mad at him, good coffee be damned. Instead of turning on the radio like Kurt expects, Sam turns to Kurt,

"So, who were you texting?"

"Oh, Dave. I ran into Sebastian when I was getting the coffees and felt the need to point out Dave's appalling taste in friends again. I still don't see how they get along without tearing each other to shreds. Smythe and I can't share a building without wanting to go for the jugular."

"Well, Dave is less bitchy than you, which doesn't take much. Sure, he's a jerk but he's mellowed a lot in the passed year or so. How's he doing now anyway?" Sam asks, curious as ever about his former teammate. While none of the other New Directions actually befriended David Karofsky after his suicide attempt a few months ago, no one blames Kurt for keeping in close contact with him either, and they are almost stupidly polite in regards to the former bully.

"He's doing good, he's finishing his homebound classes next week, which means in a couple weeks he'll be hanging around McKinley a bit, to take his exams so he can get the credits he'll need to graduate."

"I still find it strange that after everything he's gone through he'll end up graduating with you guys anyway, he didn't even go to our school this year. Not that I can blame him for not going back to that hell hole he was in before."

"Yeah, if there's anyone they should be bending the rules for, it's definitely him. Did you know his old school did nothing about the idiots that were taunting him? Not even a slap on the wrist. They said they had no proof, same shit they pulled when it was me accusing David," Kurt says in disgust.

After David got out of the hospital back in February he talked his doctors into getting him put into a homebound program at McKinley. Homebound being very similar to home-school, but was supposed to be only temporary, and usually only for students so sick they couldn't get to school everyday. He met with his teacher twice a week, did mostly self-study, and tests on Fridays. Luckily he had most of his credits already, so his work load wasn't heavy, he spent most of his days playing video games, texting, and reading. _Lucky bastard. Well, except for the whole, attempted suicide thing. And the parents divorcing thing... but hey, he's better off this way. If his mom was never going to accept him it's better to get it all out of the way now, so he knows not to look forward to her being part of his life._

Suddenly Finn seems to snap awake, "Hey! Dude, what the hell with the post-it this morning? I don't even know how you got it to stick to my face like that but seriously, I woke up and freaked the hell out!"

"Truth. He actually fell out of bed when it tickled his face, the screaming and the thump is what woke me up this morning." Sam was not even trying to hide his amusement, laughing openly at Finn.

"It's not funny you assholes, I hit my head when I fell!"

Smiling widely, Kurt manages to not laugh outright, "Sorry Finn, probably should have realized you would do something stupid. I just didn't know where else to put it where I knew you'd see it." Finn starts grumbling to himself, drinking more of his coffee and throwing out death-glares. Sam does eventually concede,

"It was pretty stupid though Kurt. If he'd fallen on the other side, I'd have been crushed under him and he'd have probably broken the... slidey bed thing."

"It's called a trundle, Sam. I doubt he'd have broken it, Gaga only knows the amount of rough-housing it's had to withstand since you moved in. And I'm sure Noah wasn't doing it any favors even before that." Kurt barely manages to finish his coffee before pulling in the school parking lot. As he climbs out of his navigator he grabs his messenger bag and glances up, half expecting Blaine to be standing there waiting for him before he remembers again.

_I really need to talk to Blaine about all this. Even if we aren't together, we should be able to be friends by now, it's been a month. And it's not like the relationship was perfect anyway. We were scheduling make out sessions for fuck's sake. Nothing says passion like being_ _**penciled in** _ _._


	2. Chapter 2

[Kurt]

Thursday, Kurt is sitting in his room, on his bed, reviewing for end of year tests. It would be going much smoother if he didn't stop and look around every few minutes, wondering what it would be like in six months, not being here, not wasting time on subjects he wouldn't actually need. Taking classes about acting, singing and dance. Maybe he'd manage to find part-time work in fashion, hopefully not in retail. He'd turned in his application for the Lima Bean yesterday, it'd be nice to get some real working experience before he's tossed out on his ass into the real world.

He's just started to refocus on his work when there's a knock on his door. Sam pokes his head in and tells Kurt that Burt is calling a family meeting. When Kurt gives him a questioning look, Sam shrugs and goes back downstairs. Silently going through his week, he tries to place anything that he'd done wrong or that would have warranted a meeting.

As Kurt comes into the living room he realizes he's the last one to come in and he sits on the couch between Finn and Sam, Carole sitting in the chair in front of them. "What's going on, Dad?"

"Well, you remember me introducing you guys to a friend of mine at the gala thing last weekend? The state's attorney, Stephan Smythe?" At the vague nods and slightly nervous look from Kurt, Burt continues, "I just got off the phone with him, apparently his mother is really sick, possibly dying. He didn't have the details, only that she needed him to come to Paris as soon as he could. He said it sounded really serious and he would probably be gone for at least a month, maybe longer."

While Carole looked like she wanted to ask more about the illness, Finn just looked confused. "Wait, I mean, I'm sorry for what they're going through, that really sucks, but what does that have to do with us?"

Rolling his eyes at Finn's lack of tact doesn't really change the fact that he has a valid point. It's heartbreaking to lose family, at any age, but Kurt can't fathom for a second that Sebastian would want details of his personal life being revealed to **him** of all people. Nor can Kurt understand the need to gather everyone up like this just for a friend's personal crisis, surely this is something he could have just mentioned over dinner tomorrow?

Burt starts to look very uncomfortable, taking off his hat to scratch at his head, he turns to Kurt, almost like he's the only person in the room. "Okay, so here's the deal, Dalton has less than a month of school left, and Stephan has to leave tomorrow. His mother is alone in France, his dad died years ago and he has no other family left in Paris, so she needs him to be there. He said he doesn't wanna pull Sebastian out so close to the end of the year but he definitely can't leave him home alone, which I'm assuming from your horrified face, you understand completely."

Kurt shudders slightly. "Even a polite, well mannered teenager shouldn't be trusted with that much freedom. If someone like Sebastian was left to his own devices we'd have to call in the National Guard or something." After meeting Sebastian at the dinner last week, Burt had sat down and asked Kurt what the awkward vibe had been between them. Once he'd told his dad about everything Sebastian had done to Blaine and Dave, he had stressed that after Dave's attempt; Sebastian had been better, not near as vicious. Although, now that he's seeing where this conversation is going he's starting to regret not pointing out that his reform seemed to have a blind spot. _Thank Prada I left out his man-whorish ways. That's just images Dad doesn't need, especially if he's going to have to get know the evil meerkat himself._

"Right, well, apparently his father feels the same, so he called me to ask if Sebastian could stay here. He knows a little about Sam's situation and asked if we might be able to put up Sebastian for a little while, 'til he can figure out what's what. I told him I had to talk to the family about it."

Carole looked concerned. "Burt, honey, we only have three bedrooms, where exactly is he going to sleep?"

Kurt flinches and glares up at his dad, daring him to continue. "O-okay, so... he'd have to sleep in Kurt's room-"

Several voices suddenly spoke out together, "What?!" from Finn,

"Nope. No way." from Sam,

"Uhhh... that's a terrible idea." from Carole.

The only person that was conspicuously quiet was Kurt himself. He'd actually seen this coming. Like Carole had said, there were only three bedrooms, no basement or attic, at least, not with livable space, and his dad wouldn't let a friend's son sleep on the couch for a month. He could hardly have his room to himself and make Finn share his room with yet another boy, especially a gay one, everyone remembers that powder keg. He'd have to be the one sharing with Sebastian. Finn would be ripped to shreds and Sam... _Well, lets just all agree that wouldn't go well._

With a long suffering sigh Kurt asks, "He **is** at least a boarder at Dalton right? So I'll only have to deal with him on the weekends?"

"Yeah, he'd be here Friday night and go back Monday mornings until school lets out for the summer. Even then, he'll have to go back and forth for lacrosse, apparently." Burt states.

Looking around the room Kurt can tell by everyone's faces they're just as unhappy about this new development as he is. Carole looks worried, glancing back and forth between Kurt and Burt. Finn looks kind of freaked out, like the thought of two gay boys sleeping in the same room, **in his house** , is his worst nightmare. _It probably is, actually._ And Sam is just staring at Kurt, knowing exactly what Kurt feels about it, he looks like he wants to say something, anything to make Burt change his mind. When Kurt finally turns to face his father again, he almost starts laughing at the look of reluctance on Burt's face.

"You're being a little too accepting of this Kurt, given what I know about your past with Sebastian, I kinda figured you'd be the one screaming the loudest about all this." When all Kurt does is raise an eyebrow at his dad, Burt says, "I know you're almost an adult now, but you're not allowed to take advantage of this situation, I'm gonna trust you not to cross any lines with him staying in your room. After what happened with Puckerman-"

Kurt can't help the look of horrified disgust on his face when he realizes his dad is worried about him hooking up with Sebastian. Sam starts laughing maniacally when he notices, eventually leaning over to whisper to Kurt, "He should be a bit more worried about you finally losing it on him and beating him to death with your hooker boots."

Despite the amusing mental image that creates, Kurt smacks him, "They aren't hooker boots you pleab, they're Doc Marten's and trust me, if I was going to beat Sebastian, I'd use the Gaga shoes." _None of this is going to matter, I'm sure Sebastian would rather live under a highway overpass than with me. I don't have to throw a bitch fit, he'll do that for me._

* * *

 

Apparently not. The next day Kurt warned Finn and Sam that he would be leaving as soon as he could get out of class, so unless they wanted to find another way home, they had to be out at the car five minutes after the last bell. He needed every minute he could get to Sebastian-proof his house. The first thing he did was go through the first floor, most of his embarrassing baby pictures had been dealt with years ago, but there were a few that were dubbed 'no way in hell' and had to be stashed in his dad's room. _Dad can just keep the tea party pictures on his dresser for awhile._

After deeming the first floor clear, Kurt makes a quick pass of the second floor before locking himself in his room. Looking around he tries to decide what all he has to hide. Quickly taking multiple pictures of his post-it strewn possessions for future reference, he strips all of them and throws them away, not wanting to explain his system, and suspecting Sebastian would just screw them all up to confuse him later anyway. _Plus it looks messy, but shut up, not the point._

Once he's sure he's removed all the colorful bits of paper, he goes wall by wall preparing to take down anything too 'girly' or conversation worthy. Surprisingly there isn't much that he removes. He's unashamed of most of this things, the main removals are last year's prom memorabilia. His crown, scepter, and prom picture are tucked away in the bottom of a combination-lock chest in his closet where he hides the things he doesn't want Finn and his friends to find. The picture alone would open up three topics that Kurt has no desire whatsoever to talk about with Sebastian-fucking-Smythe: Kurt crowned Prom Queen, Kurt in a kilt, and Blaine in general.

Being reminded of the kilt, Kurt digs into his closet and drags it out, along with his other skirts, corsets or anything else in that vein, it's not like he had been wearing them anyway. Opening up his nightstand drawer, he stops to decide what all he should hide. He eventually decides that a certain Christmas present from Blaine should be locked away. And no, he doesn't mean the fabulous leather messenger bag that Kurt had opened in front of his family. Leaving the rest of the contents of his nightstand is a little nerve wracking, but come on, if Sebastian doesn't have most of the same things stashed in not just his own nightstand at home, but also his school bag, locker, and probably his car, Kurt will eat a shoe. _No need to be a prude about it._

With one last look around the room to make sure he didn't forget anything, Kurt walks back to his closet, double checking the lock on the chest before tackling the clothes. Knowing that he won't need his winter wardrobe until long after he's in New York, Kurt packs his heavy coats, thick pants, sweaters, and winter accessories, leaving one article of each type of course. _One never knows when you'll suddenly need a sweater or something... I've only just realized I sound like a boyscout, and a fairly pompous one._

With all the space created from packing away his heaviest clothes, Kurt figures that's enough room for Sebastian, it's not like he's bringing everything he owns and honestly, Kurt has more closet space than most teenage boys rightfully need. He'd even manged to clear out a large dresser drawer and left it slightly open so he'd remember to point it out to Sebastian when he got there. Next he moves over to the corner of his room under the windows, taking the usual chair that sits there to the basement, and getting Finn to help bring the roll-away bed back up with him.

As he makes up the mattress with fresh linens, he suddenly remembers why the bed was bought, back in sophomore year, for Finn to use back when Kurt thought they would share a room. _It's actually kind of amazing how far we've come in just two years. Now, not only could I share a room with Finn if we had to but Sam and Noah would both be comfortable sleeping in the same room with me. God, we hadn't even met Sam yet back then. Besides, I really should have known better than to put that much Moulin Rouge into a room with a straight boy._

Despite the fairly horrible memory of that fight, Kurt can't stop himself from laughing a little at Finn's face back then. Kurt smiles fondly, knowing that Finn keeps one of the dreaded lamps in his room as a reminder to never let that kind of fear turn on him or Kurt ever again. Realizing that his dad will be back with Sebastian soon, Kurt takes one last look around the room to make sure he hasn't left out anything too incriminating. He finally says goodbye to having his own room and goes downstairs to await his doom. _Okay, that was dramatic, even for me, but seriously? The rodent-faced bastard is going to be in my_ _ **room**_ _. I think I have the right to freak out a little._

Heaving a long suffering sigh, he flops himself down on the couch, leaning against Sam and pouting up at him, not caring that Sam is too busy playing Xbox to even acknowledge Kurt. "Well, my room has now been purged and is ready for invasion. Hey Sam, want to switch rooms? Don't worry, there's at least a 50% chance that Sebastian won't molest you in your sleep."

While Sam just laughs and continues raining fire and destruction down on Finn's character, Finn looks up, pauses the game and asks, "That's not like, a real worry is it? I mean, yeah, he's kind of an ass but he wouldn't... do that sorta thing to you would he?"

Kurt snorts, "Oh no, not me, I'm definitely safe. I'm no where near Sebastian's type, he sees me as one step away from a drag queen. Sam on the other hand, is probably exactly his type."

Sam grins widely and says with a wink, "It's the lips, boys can't resist the lips!" Seeing Finn's look of horror at the mental images that produces, Kurt can't contain his giggles and buries his face in Sam's back, trying to recover.

Before he's even managed to sit back up, the front door opens and Burt walks in, closely followed by Sebastian, who's carrying a sports bag. Pausing the game again, Finn, Sam and Kurt all awkwardly wave or nod at Sebastian, standing up and moving a little closer but noticing his total lack of expression, don't do or say anything else. The tense silence is broken by Carole coming down the stairs, immediately going to hug Sebastian, "Oh honey, I'm so sorry, have you heard anything else about your grandmother?"

"My dad is flying out tonight, we actually just met him on the way to the airport, he'll call me tomorrow when he finds something out." Sebastian is speaking very monotone, like he doesn't know what to do in a situation he can't smirk his way through.

The awkward silence returns and Kurt finally elbows his dad, giving him a pointed look. Taking the hint, Burt says, "Okay buddy, why don't I show you around while they make dinner and you can settle in a bit. Like I told you in the car, Friday is family dinner, which you'll be part of now, and I'm warning you now, Kurt has become a bit of a Nazi about it ever since my heart attack. We trade off on chores, but we'll go easy on you the first week, if you don't know how to do something, just ask one of the guys, God knows they needed more help than mostly grown men should have."

"Hey! Shouldn't you blame the parents when kids don't know stuff? It's not our fault that our moms took care of everything!" Sam defended.

"Yeah, yeah. Well, it's just good you guys learned now before you went off to college and starved to death under an avalanche of dirty socks." Burt moves back to the kitchen to show Sebastian around before moving upstairs.

Once the coast is clear, Kurt offers to help Carole with dinner, avoiding going back to his room and having to see Sebastian's look of derision and disgust. _I think I'll put off hearing his thoughts on my taste in décor as long as possible, thanks._

* * *

[Sebastian]

Sebastian really can't believe his luck. As he follows Burt through the second floor he's tempted to ask out loud if this is really happening. For one thing, he really can't believe his grand-mère is sick. There's just no way. He's always been half convinced he would die before she would, and he's finding it a little strange to even think of her as old and alone the way his père had made her sound. Sure, he knew she was technically alone in Paris, but it's never bothered her before. She's always been a very social person, always throwing parties and luncheons.

Sighing quietly he tries to tune back in on what Burt has been talking about, he hasn't been listening at all. Ah, he's explaining the bathroom situation. Apparently he thinks having four boys sharing a bathroom really only intended for two is going to turn their house into Lord of the Flies. After reminding him to make sure he locks both doors when he goes in and unlocks them when he comes out, he stresses heavily that there is another half bath off the dining room downstairs, clearly hoping to avoid WWIII. Not knowing whether to be worried or amused by Burt's obvious concern about teenage boys fighting over a bathroom, Sebastian simply nods.

After pointing out the doors to both his own room, then Finn and Sam's, Burt finally shows him where he'll be staying. Having already been warned that he'd be sleeping in Kurt Hummel's room, Sebastian pulls up his strongest poker face, preparing to be assaulted by pink walls and Lady Gaga posters. He's relieved and surprised to find no pink in the room when he's led inside, at least not enough to notice. As he glances around, he quickly notices the bed shoved under a window, obviously recently put there judging by the fact that the blankets don't quite match everything else in the room, not to mention it's a bit bigger than the space really allows, making that one area look cramped where the rest of the room looks intentional.

"Okay, well that's the house then! We also have a basement off the kitchen but it's not finished and is used for storage. Dinner should be ready soon so you should probably put off unpacking your duffel until after. Kurt did say he would clear out some space for you in the dresser and closet, and it looks like he did, so... see ya in a bit, kiddo." Burt awkwardly closes the door and Sebastian can hear his feet clomping on the stairs as he goes back down. Finally left alone, he decides to poke around a bit, because really, why not?

After throwing his bag down on the bed, Sebastian looks around the room, still half expecting to see a feather boa or stuffed animal collection. Stepping closer to the bookcase, he finds everything from Oscar Wilde to Eragon. The girliest thing he finds is actually a crystal imbedded skull, which just confuses him.

Glancing over at Kurt's bed, Sebastian notices the nightstand and can't help but smirk, walking over and opening it, not touching anything but being slightly disappointed that the only things of note in there is a small bottle of lube, condoms and some tissues amongst the fashion magazines, an old Altoids tin, flashlight and sleep mask. Closing the drawer before he gets caught, he moves to the closet, shaking his head when he notices that the boy actually owns a vanity, covered with bottles and tubes. _Of course he does, god only knows how long he spends every day putting that shit on._

A quick glance inside shows him that there's actually quite a bit more space cleared than he thought he'd be allowed. Suddenly wishing he'd brought more clothes, he decides to ask someone to drive him to his family home tomorrow so he can pick up some stuff, including his car if his dad agrees. All he has is his school work and a change or two of clothes, shoved into his lacrosse gear bag, the only thing he had that was big enough to fit everything. Not bothering to change since it's so late, he at least takes off his shoes, blazer, and tie, feeling oddly uncomfortable being in Kurt's room and not fully dressed. _Come on, I've been much less dressed in much weirder places, get over it._

He flops back on the bed he assumes is his and after a minute it finally hits that his grand-mère may actually be sick, might actually **die**. Not able to handle that fact, he decides to text Dave. Still amused at Dave's new nickname on his phone, Sebastian chuckles and types,

_**To Bear Cub: guess where I am right now?** _

_From Bear Cub: Id guess hell, but that's mean right?_

_**To Bear Cub: Actually, I'm laying on kurt hummel's bed, so you're not far off.** _

_From Bear Cub:_ _WHAT?! How the hell did u get there?!_

_**To Bear Cub: LMAO I knew thatd get your attention, I'm actually staying here. Can't believe lady face didn't already tell you actually.** _

_From Bear Cub:_ _We havent talked in a cple days, been busy getting rdy for my tests... get off his bed Seb._

_**To Bear Cub: Aww, you still have the hots for Hummel huh?** _

_From Bear Cub:_ _Nah, I just really don't wanna have to bail Kurt outta jail when he gets arrested for murdering u. srsly, u should move before he comes back._

_**To Bear Cub: How do you know he's not sitting right here beside me? ;)** _

_From Bear Cub:_ _LOL ya rite man, he'd never go for u. srsly, move, he's gonna dye ur hair pink while you sleep or something. U have no idea what ur messin with rite now._

_**To Bear Cub: Jeez, you ruin all the fun, I'm on the spare bed in his room, not his actual bed, relax.** _

He's just hit send when he hears footsteps outside the door. Sitting up, Sebastian watches as Kurt comes in, laying his phone down on the table by the door and telling him awkwardly, "Dinner is ready, and there's a house rule of no cell phones at the table. You should hurry, even best-behavior-for-company manners won't keep Finn and Sam from eating everything if you're late." Kurt then just turns and leaves, not even waiting for a response. He'd gotten another text,

 _From Bear Cub:_ _well at least I won't have to fight off mental images of the 2 of u sharing a bed. Talk abt nightmares. So y r you staying with Fancy?_

_**To Bear Cub: Long story short, my grandmere may or may not be dying, don't know the details yet, will let ya know when I know. Ok, gotta go to dinner, I've been summoned. Later** _

_From Bear Cub:_ _shit man, that sucks, hope she's ok, ttyl._

Getting up, he sticks the phone into the side of his duffel and shoves it under the bed to be dealt with later. He walks to the dining room like he's marching to a funeral dirge. When he walks in, he's relieved to see that the only spot left at the table is beside Finn and that Kurt is actually the farthest from him he could be, sitting beside Sam. While eating, he has a bit of trouble keeping up with the conversations, having only ever been in family meals with his père and grand-mère. Burt, Finn, and Sam are talking about football and Kurt and Carole are talking about New York, and whether or not he'll need to go clothes shopping again now that the spring lines have hit, occasionally one of them will switch conversations like they'd been part of it the whole time. Sebastian really couldn't care less about either topic so he keeps to himself.

He's surprised to find he actually likes the pasta quite a bit, he's usually a very picky eater. _Maybe my standards are just slipping?_ When he notices that Kurt gets distracted by a question from Burt, Sebastian takes the opportunity to compliment Carole. "This is really good Mrs. Hummel- uh, Hudson? I'm sorry I'm not sure what your name technically is now."

There's a brief moment of silence as Carole glances at Kurt, who shakes his head for some reason, before she turns back to Sebastian, "Thank you sweetie, I'm glad you like it. It's actually Hudson-Hummel, but you can just call me Carole."

Sebastian manages a weak smile before Burt distracts him with, "Actually, considering how much of a tyrant Kurt has become about eating healthy, it's a very good thing you can appreciate dinners without much meat." Kurt blushes lightly and leans back in his chair muttering something, earning him a snort and an elbow nudge from Sam, Kurt's only response being a lip twitch and a hand flap in Sam's direction.

The Hudmels, sans Kurt, try a few more times to get Sebastian to talk but get vague and reluctant answers and eventually give up. Soon enough everyone has finished and Burt and Carole head out to the living room, reminding Finn and Sam it's their turn to clear. Finn immediately jumps up and starts grabbing glasses, carefully maneuvering himself back into the kitchen trying not to drop anything. Kurt gets up and starts to help Sam stack the dishes carefully to be hauled in. Sebastian stands, offering help.

"Nah man, it's cool, it's your first night, relax, your time will come." Sam responds. As he turns to leave Sebastian hears, "That goes for you too, you did most of the cooking, you sure as hell aren't doing the dishes, get out of here." Sebastian turns just in time to see Sam smack Kurt on the ass and shove him lightly toward the door to the living room. Kurt grins and is about to make a snarky comment about Sam touching his ass when he turns to find Sebastian's raised eyebrow. Coughing awkwardly, Kurt steps around Sebastian and heads into the living room.

When he recovers enough to follow, Sebastian finds Kurt going through a cupboard of board games with Carole, and hears them discussing which ones they could play without the night ending in screaming and/or tears. Quickly realizing he's expected to spend the night playing Scrabble or something else equally ridiculous, Sebastian asks to be excused, claiming he's tired and just wants to unpack and go to bed early.

"Sure kiddo, it's been a helluva day, let us know if ya need anything." Thanking Burt, he makes his escape before someone can pop out of a closet with a guitar and a bag of marshmallows and ask to sing campfire songs.

When he gets back in the room he grabs his bag, deciding now is a good time to unpack what little he brought. His phone chimes so he checks it, only mildly annoyed by the text wall Jeff has sent him.

_From Draco: hey! Are you at Kurt's yet?_

_From Draco: Wtf dude, so rude, are you there yet?_

_From Draco: Seb? Seriously, you there yet?_

_From Draco: Come on, stop ignoring me, I know you have your phone, you always have your phone. D=_

Quickly typing a response before he can be pelted with even more inane texts,

 _**To Draco: jesus fuck Jeff, be more annoying would you? I didn't have my phone, we were having dinner, apparently no phones at dinner with the Hudmel** _ _s._

_From Draco: Oh! actually I knew about that rule, Kurt kept forgetting his phone when we went down to dinner, said it was habit. So how's it going? Is he there? Say hi for me!_

_**To Draco: No, reject, he's not here, he's downstairs playing a board game or something, idk I bailed as soon as I could.** _

_From Draco: Ok, tell him I said hi when he comes back? Shit, gotta go, my mom is yellin. Tell him I said bye too!_

_**To Draco: Later idiot lol** _

He pokes around in the closet a little and then finally gets around to unpacking. Sebastian hangs up his clothes, including his blazer and tie, and stashes what few non-clothing items he brought in the drawer with his socks and underwear. He stretches out on the bed, staring at the ceiling and wondering how his life ended up this way. _Seriously, it's so fucking unfair. How is it that_ _ **after**_ _I decide to stop being a douche, my life goes to shit? I haven't blackmailed or bullied anyone in months, I haven't even been to Scandals in over two months. So why is it that_ _ **now**_ _I'm stuck living with Kurt 'Gay Face' Hummel? I still can't believe P_ _ère_ _didn't cave and just let me stay home alone, he's usually such a pushover. And really, out of all of_ _his_ _friends, why the hell did it have to be Burt?_

Grabbing his laptop, he pulls up his email, sending his père a lengthy message about how unfair it was that he was 17 and he couldn't be trusted to be left alone in the house on the weekends. He also asks if he can go to the house tomorrow and get some stuff, especially his car, because now that Stephan isn't around to drive him back and forth to Columbus on his way to and from work, he'd definitely have to drive himself on the weekends. He asks how grand-mère is doing, and tells him to call whenever he hears something, no matter what time it is.

After sending off the email he switches to facebook, replying to messages from Thad and Nick. It's as he's scrolling through his friends list looking for someone to talk to that he realizes, he's been here for about two hours now, and been around Burt almost two hours before that, and not one person has mentioned Blaine. That seems a little odd, considering everyone knows that he's gay, and he'll be staying in another gay boy's room, even if that boy is Gay Face. _Maybe they got in a fight over it?_ After everything that Sebastian had done he can definitely imagine Blaine throwing a fit about him staying in Kurt's room. _I wouldn't want someone as damn fine as myself in my boyfriend's room._

Snorting to himself at the notion that he would be at all interested in making a move on the most stereotypically effeminate boy in a 100 mile radius, Sebastian signs off facebook and looks around the room a bit closer, looking for any pictures of Blaine. He does find some, there are five or six pictures around the room, all but one are pictures of a large group of kids that Sebastian recognizes as Kurt's glee club, Nude Erections. In the more recent pictures, Blaine is standing with Kurt with arms wrapped around each other. The only picture that isn't of the glee kids is actually framed and sitting on the dresser. It's an old picture, that or someone is very talented with instagram filters, of a pretty woman with small features and soft brown hair holding a toddler, which is clearly Kurt. _Ah, his real mom. Burt said she'd died when he was young. She looks like him, way more than Burt does at any rate._

A loud "WHOOP!" from downstairs almost makes Sebastian jump, snapping out of his thoughts. Noticing that he's been standing around staring at the picture for way longer than he intended, he decides to take advantage of the fact that everyone is downstairs and busy, and take a shower. After gathering his toiletry bag, underwear, and some track pants, Sebastian heads for the bathroom. He takes a quick second to poke his head through the other door in the bathroom, surprised that it's actually not that messy considering two teenage boys live in there. It's also better decorated than he figured it would be, apparently Kurt had control issues, he was even designing rooms that weren't his. _Actually considering the taste level, it was probably Carole that picked out everything for both boys' rooms._ He shakes himself again and retreats back into the bathroom, hoping to finish his shower before Kurt comes back up.

* * *

[Kurt]

Kurt opens his bedroom door, smiling widely. He'd managed a last minute win on Twister, making up for the true trouncing he'd received from Carole's Boggle. Granted, his only real competition at Twister was Sam, but he still took great pleasure in the win. Next time, when it was Finn and Sam's turn to pick, he knew all he could possibly look forward to would be Battleship and Xbox.

It's only after he hears the shower running that he snaps out of his stupor, remembering that there should be a smug meerkat hiding out in his room. He'd honestly managed to forget him for an hour or so. Relying on Sebastian being the new guy, who would likely forget to unlock the second door, Kurt gathers up his pajamas and waits patiently for the water to turn off.

When Sebastian does step out, Kurt pops up, ready to dart past him as soon as he's clear of the door. He's stopped momentarily by the fact that Sebastian is not actually wearing a shirt. His brain stutters for a second and while he patiently waits for it to reboot, Sebastian raises an eyebrow again and steps around Kurt to put his clothes away. Kurt shakes himself, thankful that Sebastian did forget to unlock the door, a fact not missed by Finn as he growls from the other side of the door. Kurt takes a quick shower, glad it's the weekend and he can get away with doing his quicker routine.

When Kurt steps out of the bathroom, dressed in soft flannel sleep pants and an oversized black henley he'd stolen from Noah, he's prepared to defend his right to moisturize. He's shocked to discover that Sebastian has already laid down to sleep with the blankets pulled up almost to his ears. He's pretty sure that Sebastian isn't actually asleep yet, but he's also pretty sure he doesn't care, as long as he isn't talking. With a relieved huff, Kurt walks by him to sit at the vanity and do his skin care regimen, taking his time but being as quiet as he can about it. Once finished he gets up and turns out the lights and crawls into bed, hoping that he'll be able to sleep quickly.


	3. Chapter 3

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian wakes up the next morning he's only slightly disgusted by the hour. He'd been hoping to sleep in a bit this morning, hopefully until his dad called. Glaring at the clock declaring it to be barely passed 7am, on a Saturday no less, Sebastian gets up and goes to the bathroom, brushing his teeth while he's in there. When he steps out to find clothes to change into, he's surprised to find Kurt gone. He's pretty sure he'd seen a head poking out of the blanket before, so he must have accidentally woken him up when he'd turned on the water. _Well shit, hope it didn't wake up the idiots next door too. It's way too early to deal with that much noise._

Quickly finding a polo shirt and a pair of jeans, Sebastian changes, grabs his phone, and heads downstairs, hoping their coffee pot is pretty easy to use. He really should have expected that Kurt was the type of person that didn't see colors until after coffee, and that's where he found him, pouring a rather large cup in the kitchen. As he moves forward to get himself a mug as well, Kurt shuffles out of the kitchen, mumbling about making breakfast in a bit.

Sebastian is pleasantly surprised to find the coffee is decent, he'd expected sludge. He sits at the kitchen table and drinks his coffee, using his phone to check his email. No response yet. Sebastian spends the next half an hour going through his school week, trying to work warbler practice around lacrosse and replying to messages and texts. He's just posting the warbler's schedule, because yes, they still meet up, to his facebook page when Kurt comes back in looking like a completely different person.

Sebastian literally has to bite his tongue to keep from pointing out that the skinny jeans and striped, slightly tight long sleeve shirt are overly obvious attempts at boy clothes. Despite knowing that he has to keep the peace as long as possible, Sebastian is finding it harder and harder to keep his comments to himself around the baby faced boy. Everything Kurt does annoys the crap out of him. Even now, dressed as plainly as it's probably possible for Kurt to dress, he looks too effeminate, flouncing around the kitchen gathering up breakfast ingredients.

Not wanting to get caught up in a conversation, he puts his head back down to his phone and pretends he's alone. _Two more days. In two days I'll be back in the land of blazers and I can go back to doing whatever I want._

* * *

 

[Kurt]

 _Two more days. He'll go back to Dalton and I can go back to life as I know it._ Kurt has been repeating this mantra to himself most of the morning, since the meerkat had woken him up this morning when he kicked the bathroom door shut. Kurt bets that he woke up Sam with that little stunt too. _Maybe I can get Sam to help me hog tie Sebastian tonight so he can't wake us up so freakin early tomorrow?_

Honestly he's just not used to it. Up until a few weeks ago his Saturday mornings were all but sacred. The same routine for almost a year, waking up no earlier than 10am wrapped around a warm body, soothed into sleeping much longer than usual by skin to skin contact and body heat. He's really not handling the lack of sleep and comfort as well as he'd hoped. _I have to talk to dad, there's no way this can keep up, especially not with Sebastian in the house. Hell, he'd be in the room, it's like a built in chaperone! So he wouldn't have anything to worry about right?_

Shaking his head at himself, Kurt finally turns back to making breakfast with his second cup of coffee in hand. As he's loading up the large serving platter with the last of the crepes, he grabs his phone and texts Sam, telling him to come down, and poke around and tell anyone that's awake that he made crepes. Just as he's setting out the turkey bacon and turkey sausages, he hears thundering footsteps that can only be Finn and Sam. He grabs his already made plate and darts out of the way, knowing how dangerous it can be to be caught in the middle.

He sits down and starts picking at some fresh berries while he waits for everyone else to get settled. Burt and Carole eventually come down as well, making large plates for themselves and Burt only making small grunting noises at the "diet meat". Sebastian seems to like this meal as well, which only makes Kurt slightly smug. Honestly, there's a lot someone can complain about with him, but his cooking isn't on that list. _At least this time he knows I cooked it._

As they're all sitting around eating, Burt asks, "So, what's everyone doing today?"

The three boys that permanently live there just give grunts or shrugs while Sebastian clears his throat and says, "Actually, I wanted to ask if someone could run me to my house for some stuff? I've sent Père an email and asked him if I could get my car too, if I'm going to be going back and forth to Westerville the least I can do is make the trips myself. He used to just drive me, since he was going to Columbus anyway, but there's no need for you guys to do the same."

"Oh, sure that makes sense. As long as it's cool with your dad, it's cool with me. Kurt you'll take him here in a bit, right? You didn't seem to have plans today." Burt is either an evil mastermind or the most clueless of men; he showed no indication that he knew what he was asking of his son.

"Uh... sure Dad, no problem." Kurt winces and finishes his breakfast, no longer enjoying the taste quite so much.

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

About an hour later, Sebastian is sitting on the couch, playing Xbox, waiting on the phone to ring, so they know whether or not it's okay to go get his stuff. Finn had gone out with Rachel and Carole had already left for work. Every now and then Kurt will glance up to watch the game Sam and Sebastian seem to be bonding over. Who knew right? Sebastian has just run Sam over with a car when they hear the phone finally start ringing. Sadly it's not his phone, it's Kurt's.

After a quick conversation, Kurt hangs up, beaming a huge smile across the room. Sam pauses the game at the same time as Burt walks into the room, asking what he's so excited about. With a wary glance at Sebastian, because he still hasn't forgotten Sebastian's moment of foreshadowing, Kurt says, "I got an interview to start working at the Lima Bean. I told them I couldn't start for like two weeks, after nationals at least, but the interview is on Monday!"

Sam pops up and gives Kurt a quick hug and wishes him luck and Sebastian has to put every bit of will power into not reacting visibly to the mental image of Kurt in a Lima Bean apron. He doesn't notice the look of disappointment on Burt's face until he speaks up, "Wait, what? I thought you'd be working at the garage this summer like you always do?"

That statement is really more confusing than it should be. _What the hell would Gay Face do working in a garage? I can't even picture him doing the desk work, too afraid to break a nail._ No one else seems to notice his confusion though,

"Dad, as much as I love working with you, I need to learn a skill I can use to get part time work in New York. At least if I learn how to use the coffee machines I can get a job in a Starbucks or something. And I figured I'd get a head start on saving up. I'm not sure when I'll actually go on up there, but the more money I have saved up the better right?"

"But you can make money working at the garage, and you can learn to use coffee machines there in New York, I'm sure they work the same there as they do here."

Kurt seems a little confused, "Sure Dad, but this way I'm bringing more money in the house, not just getting money off you. What's this really about, it never occurred to me that you'd have a problem with this?"

Burt seems mildly embarrassed now, "Well one of the guys quit recently, and instead of replacing him I've just been making do, I figured you'd be there inside a couple weeks and you could more than make up for him, God knows you're faster. I'd also been hoping you could take over the office more so I could spend more time in D.C. until you go to New York. The guys at the shop are great but I can't really trust them with the management side of things, they don't know how to work everything. And frankly the turnover rate at the shop is a bit worrying, I don't wanna have to train a new guy over and over."

Sebastian is now as confused as he could possibly be, is Burt implying that Kurt works on the cars? _Seriously? And_ _ **take over**_ _the office? Like, run it?_ _ **What?**_

Kurt snaps out of his thoughts suddenly, and Sebastian is surprised to see an evil smile light up Kurt's face. "Okay Dad, I'll come in for the next two weeks, after school and on weekends to help with the backlog, but under two conditions. One, you don't have to pay me, but you're going to hire Noah effective immediately. I'll spend the next two weeks teaching him about your regular customers' cars and helping him brush up on the more rare models we get in that he may not know how to work on. I'll also help him as long as I'm here if he gets a car or situation he doesn't know how to handle. You know as well as I do that he can do this, he knows more than most licensed mechanics. If he needs help after I'm gone, you will have to teach him, and be civil while doing it. I'll also train him on running the office. You might need to double check his work for awhile, but he's smart, he'll pick it up quickly and he's loyal, so you won't have to do it over and over."

Burt considers for a second but finally agrees, "Okay, fine, what's the second condition?"

"You know what the second condition is! You lift the ban. It's only fair, you know you overreacted! You have to agree to let Noah back in the house and not throw a fit anytime you catch him in my room. You know what our relationship is so it's really not cool for you to start screaming at him for no reason. I swear he's terrified of you now, after you lost it on him that morning, I'm not sure he **will** come back."

Sam starts chuckling, hiding his face in a pillow when Kurt turns his glare on him. Burt finally speaks up, "Okay fine, but the boy has to wear pants, Kurt. Do you think it did my heart any favors walking in and seeing that? I still haven't recovered and it's been **weeks**."

"Noah can't sleep in pants, Dad, and it's not like we planned for you to walk in. I'll agree that he has to wear loose boxers or basketball shorts, but seriously, I'm turning 18 in like, two weeks, you need to get over this. Not to mention we'll have our own personal chaperone now, right?" Kurt reasoned.

"Fine, but only on the condition that he can only stay on nights Sebastian is here." Burt turns to look at Sebastian, who is now desperately trying to keep a straight face and not crack into the most confused he's ever looked. _What the ever loving fuck is going on? Who the hell is Noah? And why was he naked? Where's Blaine?!_ "Usually I would never ask a teenager to play chaperone, especially in a situation like this, but despite Kurt's best efforts to gloss over that part of your past, your father has actually told me quite a bit about you, so you shouldn't be bothered by this right?"

Eventually Sebastian realizes they are all waiting on a response, so he does his best to recover from his shock and force words out, "Uh, sure. Yeah, whatever, I don't care."

"Ugh, fine, you can tell him the ban is lifted, but I swear if I catch him naked again, Kurt-" Burt seems truly traumatized by the possibility.

"The only real way to never find out too much about your gay son is to knock and wait for a response, Dad." Kurt is trying to play it off like it's no big deal, but he looks like he's about to start bouncing in place. Burt leaves the house, telling them he's heading to the garage and will be back for dinner, grumbling under his breath. Once he's pulled out of the driveway, Kurt turns to Sebastian, "Thank you, I know you don't care but this actually means a lot to me. I don't suppose you'd want to go ahead and get your stuff would you? I know we're supposed to wait for your dad to tell you it's okay, but it'd be really great if we could get back as soon as possible."

"Sure, let me go grab my keys. Père's a total pushover anyway, so I'm sure he'll give permission when he actually checks his email." As Sebastian runs up the stairs he hears Kurt telling Sam,

"Can you text Noah and explain everything when he wakes up? I'll give him more details later but it'd be awesome if he could come over today, and I don't know how long this will take."

Grabbing his duffel, so he can fill it back up, his wallet, and his keys, he slips his shoes on and runs back downstairs. He's more than a little shocked when he gets his first glimpse at Kurt's Navigator. _Oookay? Who does he think he is, 50 cent? Does he really need spinners? … It is pretty nice though._

* * *

 

[Kurt]

Kurt tells Sebastian that he needs a mocha and they agree to stop by the Lima Bean. The tense truce they seem to have called for the time being seems to be holding, but Kurt isn't taking any chances of pissing Sebastian off, not when he's so close to having Noah back in the house. It's as they are pulling into the main part of town, on the road to the Lima Bean, that Sebastian's phone finally rings.

"Hello? Père? Thank god, where the hell have you been? You could have called to let me know you were there or something. Have you talked to Grand-mère's doctors?"

Kurt pulls up outside the coffee shop and decides to just go on in and order their coffees himself, he taps Sebastian on the shoulder and signals that he's going in to give him some privacy. He only gets a wave in return.

Kurt gets out and goes inside. As he's waiting in line he also picks out a couple muffins, figuring that if they don't eat them, it's not like they'll go to waste in a house with so many teenage boys in it. It's not until after he's placed it that he realizes he knows Sebastian's coffee order. Not sure how he feels about that, he waits for the cups in tense silence. As he's walking back to the car he notices that Sebastian looks livid, not quite the response one expects from a call about a sick relative. When he opens the door he catches Sebastian mid sentence and he stumbles for a second before switching fluidly to French,

"-can't believe you would... **seriously, Grand-mère, what the hell were you thinking? I know you've always been a bit crazy but aren't you taking it a bit too far now? What possible reason could you have for doing this?** "

When Sebastian keeps talking like he isn't in the car, Kurt realizes that Sebastian doesn't know that he speaks French. He's debating with himself on whether or not to fill Sebastian in on the fact that he can understand everything he's saying perfectly when his thoughts are interrupted again,

" **Grand-mère, have you lost your mind? I didn't drop any hints- ... No! Absolutely not! … You're so wrong it's slightly unbelievable. How could you possibly have jumped to this conclusion?! … I DID NOT. … Are you really telling me Père is just going along with this?! … Oh, of course he is, who am I kidding. … No. … You're wrong and it's not going to work. … Because it's not like that, Grand-mère! … Ya know, this. This right here. When gay people come out to their family, parents and guardians always ask, 'Is it something I did, did I make them gay?' THIS. This right here is why I'm gay, Grand-mère. You convinced me, by example, at the tender age of four that women were soulless demons that weren't to be trusted. When I got old enough to think about sex, everything in my body told me to run in the opposite direction from all things female. It's ALL YOUR FAULT.** "

Kurt is sitting in the driver's seat feeling about five different emotions. Confusion- why is Sebastian screaming at a dying woman at the top of his lungs? Amusement- he's actually quite the drama queen, which coming from Kurt, is saying something. Horror- seriously, why is he screaming at a dying woman? Annoyance- he's just being ignored now, while he sits here holding Sebastian's coffee and watching him freak out. And reluctance- clearly Sebastian is upset, and Kurt doesn't know how to handle the fact that he wants to comfort him. _I can't feel sorry for this bastard, he's screaming at his grandmother at the top of his lungs. That and he's an asshole._

Kurt finally settles on acceptance and puts Sebastian's coffee in the cup holder, sipping at his own and waiting him out.

" **Okay Grand-mère, ya know what, fine. Do whatever you want. Just know that this isn't going to work and you're just wasting your time. So enjoy having Père there, I'm not coming. In fact I'm not coming this summer either. How dare you trap me in this situation? … NO! That is NOT why I won't come to Paris! … Jesus fuck, Grand-mère, I hate you so much right now. … yeah yeah, tell Père I said thanks and tell him to email me tonight so I can get the rest of his side of this clusterfuck. I love you too Grand-mere. Bye.** "

Kurt can tell when Sebastian remembers his existence, he can almost hear the click before he turns to Kurt and scowls, clearly trying to decide on what to say. "So yeah, my grand-mère is not actually sick. She's just a bitch. She apparently decided-" He stops himself, pausing briefly before continuing, "She's decided that Père is working too hard and that he needs to relax. So, she lied to get him to come to Paris for the summer, or at least the month. Père, who said we **can** actually go get my car by the way, if you want to ever leave this fucking parking lot, caved, as usual. He has agreed to stay with her, deeming her lonely because otherwise, and I quote, 'She wouldn't have done all this'. Clearly the man isn't paying attention. She would have done this because she's bored. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if the old crone made him fly all the way there just to fetch her purse."

Kurt catches himself smiling at the mental image of a little old lady bullying her son and grandson like this. He quickly schools his expression back into concern, asking, "So you don't actually have a reason to be at our house? It's just your grandmother being difficult?"

"Well, I do actually have to stay with you, if Burt will let me, because even though she isn't dying, she still has my père held captive in France. Hell, even if he tried to leave, I bet she's stolen his passport by now. You wouldn't believe how crafty this woman is." Sebastian huffs, watching out the window, slowly sipping his coffee, and directing them when Kurt needs to turn.

"Actually she sounds a lot like you, so yeah, I have a pretty good idea." Although he doesn't say it out loud, Kurt is kind of grateful that there's a member of his family that is willing to stand up to Sebastian's bullshit and would call him out on it, if needed. Clearly the dad is no help. As Kurt makes the final turn, pulling in to a long driveway, he's unprepared for the enormity of the house itself. Stopping in the front of the circled drive, he looks at Sebastian and can tell by the tenseness that he's waiting for Kurt to make a bitchy comment about being spoiled or some such. Just to be unpredictable, Kurt ignores the obvious and says, "Okay, so here ya go, you need help or anything before I go?"

Looking reluctant, Sebastian admits, "Okay, so I just realized how stupid I was in that I didn't actually pay attention to where we were, and I'm not 100% sure where you live. If you're just going straight back home, can you hang out for like 15 minutes so I can just follow you back? I could look up how to get there with the address but I'd have to pull over to check roads and shit, and I don't want to pull over a lot. If I wrecked my car on top of everything else that's going on, I swear I'd just slit my-" Kurt can tell that he's just realized what he was going to say and he kind of looks like he's going to throw up.

Usually Kurt would take this opportunity to point out what a heartless bastard he is, but for one, he can see how affected he is, and two, David is just not a conversation he wants to have. Taking the high road again, what a day for personal growth, Kurt just says, "Sure, I'm just going home to call Noah and see if he's gonna stay over tonight, so I don't mind hanging around." They get out of the car and stand awkwardly for a minute before Kurt speaks up, "I'll wait here for you, just try to hurry with packing up." Sebastian nods and heads inside without saying anything else.

After looking around a bit, Kurt finally gets bored enough to pull out his phone, scrolling through his friends list to find someone to talk to for a few minutes. It's not super early anymore but it is barely noon on a Saturday and most of his friends are probably still asleep. Right away he comes across Blaine and he hovers over the call button. Blaine is an early riser, even if he slept in, Kurt is sure he's been up for at least an hour... and they **do** need to talk. Now isn't quite the best time though. Instead of calling he switches to text,

_**To Blaine: So, I'm not completely sure how this 'friends after break up' thing is supposed to work, but I miss talking to you.** _

Kurt actually catches himself chewing on his thumb nail while he waits for a response, a habit that he finds disgusting in other people and refuses to admit that comes out when he's nervous. Finally he hears the chime,

_From Blaine: Thank God, I was worried this weird silence would go on forever. I miss you too! We were friends first, we should be able to stay friends after, right?_

With relief flooding him, Kurt finally manages,

_**To Blaine: OMG, yes. I can't really talk as much as we need to at the moment, but we need to meet up so we can beat each other with foam bats or whatever it is we need to do to get passed this.** _

_From Blaine: Or, and I'm just throwing this out there, we could just go get coffee and talk about it like adults. I mean, you'll be one soon enough right? =P_

_**To Blaine: Okay, so since tomorrow is Sunday, and everyone else in the world sleeps but us, want to meet up at about 9am?** _

_From Blaine: Sure! I'm so glad you txted =D_

_**To Blaine: me too =)** _

Kurt manages to tuck the phone away before Sebastian comes back out, but he's still wearing a huge smile. "Whoa, what's up with that, you weren't that happy ten minutes ago."

Snapping out of it, Kurt says, "Actually, I was just texting Blaine. Did you get everything you'll need?"

Sebastian seems a little surprised at the sudden mention of Blaine, "Ah, so you guys are still going strong? I wondered. Yeah, I got everything, I packed it already. I just ran out to tell ya I'm good to go, I'll follow you in my car."

 _I guess he did notice the mysterious lack of Blaine in my life. It hasn't even been a full day but I'm sure it looks weird to him. Now that I'm talking to him again and Noah will be in the house, I should probably bite the bullet..._ Before he gets a chance to disappear back into the garage, Kurt stops him.

"Wait, actually, Blaine and I broke up. That was the first time I've really talked to him in a month, which is why I was happy, it looks like we might be able to stay friends after all. I was worried about that, a lot, I think I hurt him pretty badly." He feels really guilty about how they ended their relationship, Blaine was really upset. Well, Kurt was too, but at least then he had Noah to help him get through it, which is kind of what led to the ban in the first place.

He can tell by the look on Sebastian's face that he wants to ask questions, but honestly, Kurt really can't handle that at the moment. _The last thing I need is to hear about how now is the perfect time for Sebastian to slip in and get Blaine in bed. It might be true, but that doesn't mean I'm ready to hear about it. Especially since his bed is, in fact, in my room._ "Okay, well, let's get out of here, I need to get home and call Noah, he should be awake, it'll be almost one, surely even that lazy sack is up by now."

He climbs back into his car but waits for Sebastian to drive out of the garage before pulling away. When Sebastian finally pulls out and shuts the garage door behind him, Kurt can't help but snort in amusement that he drives a red Mazda Miata. _Oh wow, well sure. Of course he does. I guess it could be worse, it could be a bright yellow Hummer. Or a Prius._

The drive back is quiet, sitting alone in his car, with only the radio on low. It's hard to contain how antsy he's getting to see Noah. It's been weeks since he's managed even a decent conversation with him. Shortly after Burt had declared him persona non grata in the Hudson-Hummel house, they'd discovered talking on the phone just made them miss each other more. It was actually easier to pretend the other didn't exist than trying to get that comfort and closeness over the phone. Neither one was very good with talking about feelings, especially Noah. But Kurt could tell something was wrong. _And it's not like we could cuddle up at school. Just because I'm out doesn't mean I want the whole school to see me snuggling up with another guy. Noah might be able to get away with it without getting his ass kicked, but I definitely wouldn't._

When they pull up outside the house, Kurt steps out, carrying the half-forgotten bag of muffins, and asks Sebastian if he needs help carrying stuff in. He takes the duffel bag of clothes and waits patiently while Sebastian grabs a box with what sounds like video games rattling around and surprisingly, a guitar case. "I didn't know you played guitar. That's nice, it'll give you something to talk to Sam and Noah about, they both play too. Well, and Artie but I'm not sure if you'll even meet him."

Sebastian goes to reply but is cut off as soon as Kurt opens the front door, "Isn't Artie the kid in the wheelchair? I met him-"

"Princess! What the fuck took you so long?!"

Sebastian winces and rubs his ear while glaring at Kurt, but no one is watching him as Kurt has just made the most annoying squealing noise, dropped Sebastian's bag, and the muffins, on the floor, and thrown himself at the tall mohawked boy.

"Noah! Oh my god! I wasn't even sure you'd be awake yet, when did you get here? Did Sam call you? Did he tell you what Dad said? I should have asked you about the garage first but I figured it was the best way to blackmail him into letting you back in the house and you wouldn't object-"

"For fuck's sake, Princess, slow down, breathe, I'm not going anywhere. I already told Mom I was staying with Finn tonight, you've got me until at least tomorrow. Calm down." The tanned boy smiles down at Kurt for a second before grabbing him back up in a hug and picking him up off his feet for a few seconds. He immediately regrets the decision because Kurt shrieks in his ear and starts slapping him.

"Ahh! Noah! Put me down! Now!" As he's set back on his feet, Kurt hears chuckling and leans around Noah to see Sam and Finn sitting on the couch laughing with Rachel in Finn's lap. Kurt is actually a little surprised that Noah is being this clingy in front of the small diva, usually it's only Sam and Finn that he feels comfortable enough around to be himself.

"Awww! I didn't believe you guys! That's so cute! How long have they been like this? You'd never know it from how they act at school. Oh my god, did Blaine know? Is that why you broke up?" Rachel looks like she can barely contain herself from jumping up and rushing them for a serious glomping.

"Rachel, you know why Blaine and I broke up, and it definitely wasn't Noah's fault. But to answer your question, yes, he did know about this. Well, he still doesn't know about the banning incident, I'll tell him tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? I didn't know you and the hobbit were talking yet..." Noah seems slightly put out and is now pouting at Kurt. Kurt pushes him over to the living room to sit down. Noah drops down in the armchair and Kurt sits on the arm of it, clearly not ready to give up contact yet. Noah, however, isn't having any of that, and pulls him down to sit on his lap with an arm around Kurt's waist. Kurt smacks him on the arm but makes no move to get up.

Suddenly remembering that Sebastian is still in the room, Kurt turns to him, "Come sit down, I swear we won't bite. Well, Sam won't." Sebastian glances to the only spot left in the room to sit, beside Sam.

"Actually, I'm just gonna bring the rest of my stuff in and get it unpacked. It's okay if I hook this up to the TV in your room, right?" He asks, shaking the box he's holding.

"Sure, mi casa, su casa and all that jazz. Feel free to come back down when you're done though, you haven't had a chance to really talk to anyone. If you're going to live here you'll have to get used to pretty much all of us." Kurt watches Sebastian nod and head back upstairs, carefully juggling the guitar case and box of, presumably, a game console. Turning back to the room full of teenagers he's surprised to see Noah cocking an eyebrow at him. "What?"

"Since when did you get along with, and I quote, 'that meerkat bastard'?"

"Oh! That's a recent development, probably temporary." Kurt stops to wonder if it's okay to tell everyone about Sebastian's scheming grandmother and eventually decides that more than likely they'll find out anyway. He hasn't really had a chance to think about the conversation he overheard, and he wouldn't share it anyway. It's not fair that he heard it, let alone telling other people, so he gives them Sebastian's version of events. "Actually, he found out a few hours ago that his grandmother isn't actually sick. She was faking it so her son would spend time with her for a month or so. Seems sneaky runs in the family. Anyway, after that drama unfolded we just kind of fell into not being assholes for awhile."

Snorting, Noah says, "Wonder how long that will last? I've never known you to be around Smythe for longer than five minutes and not go full bitch-mode. You never told me what you meant about tomorrow."

"Oh yeah, well, I finally broke and texted Blaine awhile ago, and we talked a little, we're going to try really hard to stay friends. While I'm not torn up about the break up anymore, I really do miss talking to him. Hopefully we'll stay close, he's one of the only people I can talk fashion with. Gaga knows all of you are hopeless. We're going to meet up for coffee in the morning. Shit, I agreed to that before I knew you'd be staying over... I'm supposed to meet him at 9am."

Seeing Kurt worrying his lip, Noah says, "It's fine babe, I haven't been sleeping well anyway, we'll probably be awake by then. If not, just go, you can grab me a coffee on the way home."

When Sebastian comes back downstairs he finds Kurt almost fully reclined on Noah, leaning back so Noah can wrap his arms around him and still see the TV and controller while he plays Xbox with Finn and Sam. Kurt has his arms crossed over his own chest to stay out of the way while he listens to Rachel telling him about her road trip to talk to Carmen Tibideaux. Kurt looks up at Sebastian,

"Hey, you got everything settled? If you want to play Xbox with them, there's another controller, although I know very little about this game." Kurt elbows Noah before he can even manage a snort at the obvious statement.

"Uh, sure. Got nothing better to do."

Rachel stands up, "I should go, I need to get back home and practice for nationals, especially if she accepts my invitation and shows up. Walk me out Finn, then you guys can get back to your silly game. It was nice seeing you again Sebastian, I'm glad your grandmother isn't sick."

After Finn detours to the kitchen to put the poor, forgotten muffins up and walks back into the living room, the mohawked boy passes his controller to Sebastian, "Actually guys, I gotta talk to Kurt about something before Burt gets home, so Seb can just take my spot." He pats Kurt on the hip to signal him to get up and then pulls Kurt upstairs by the hand without waiting for a response.

Once they're behind a closed door Noah immediately grabs him into a tight hug. Kurt pushes him back toward the bed so they can lay down and be more comfortable. After a few long minutes of silence, Noah finally relaxes his grip enough that Kurt can breathe properly. "Hey, what's going on? You seemed fine before."

Noah finally breaks, telling Kurt about being cornered by the hockey team at school yesterday. How he'd taken the prop from West Side Story and threatened Rick with it. How Coach Beiste had found him, how he lost it and cried in the locker room, how worthless he feels, how he isn't going to graduate. Finally, how he'd felt when she'd told him he was loved, and how he's only ever heard that from his mom and sister, and not in a very long time. By the time he gets it all out, Kurt is hugging him harder than Noah was before. Eventually Kurt manages,

"I'm so sorry, Noah! If I had known any of this was going on I'd have had Finn and Sam help sneak you in, Dad's ban be damned. You don't have to go through this stuff alone! Even with the awkwardness of what happened, Dad wouldn't have begrudged you needing family around you. And that's what we are Noah, you could have come to any of us, we all love you, I really hope you know that."

"Love you too, Princess. But I didn't want to come over and put more stress on you and Burt. With you leaving soon I didn't want to cause a rift there, and I knew you were still getting over Blaine, I didn't think you'd need more drama." Noah looks sheepish and worried about Kurt's reaction. Rightly so, because Kurt smacks his shoulder,

"Jeez Noah, I don't care about drama or fights with Dad, if you're hurting that much, **talk to me**. And what the hell were you thinking taking a knife, even a fake knife, to a fight at school?!" Kurt starts smacking him again, and only stops when the bigger boy pins his arms to his side in a hug.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I won't do it again. Can we just lay here a bit? I really don't want to go downstairs and have the guys asking what's wrong."

"Sure. Actually, we should take a nap. I've been woken up way too early, way too often lately." With that, Kurt pushes Noah down on his back and lays on his chest with his arms curled up above his head, playing with the back of his mohawk until he feels Noah drift off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

[Sebastian]

About an hour after they go upstairs, Kurt comes back down and sits on the couch, since Sebastian took the chair. He leans heavily on Sam, who asks, "Where's lover boy? All the bouncing and arm flapping tire him out already?" Sebastian really is rather confused by the relationship status of Kurt Hummel. Ever since he's met him, Kurt has been firmly in the 'Blaine's boyfriend' box. Now that they're broke up, he really doesn't know how to think of him anymore. _And that's not accounting for the way he acts with both Noah and, to a lesser extent, Sam._

Finn snorts and laughs and Kurt just mumbles, "Shut up... and yes he fell asleep." When Kurt moves to cuddle closer, Sam shifts for a better position without losing focus on the game. They end up with Kurt's head leaning back against Sam's chest while Kurt watches Sebastian killing off Finn on Call of Duty. "By the way, he's had a tough few days, so if he comes down looking kind of rough, keep it to a minimum, or no waffles tomorrow."

Finn snorts again, "Yeah right, like he would let you get away without making him waffles on his first morning in weeks?"

"I didn't say Noah wouldn't get them, I said you wouldn't. Who says we have to wake you up?" Kurt glares slightly but takes no effort to move more than his head.

"Point. Okay, fine, we'll leave him alone."

"Thank you." Kurt says primly. The only sounds for about 15 minutes are gun fire, groans and cheers as Sebastian and Sam team up to hunt down Finn, who'd gotten a little too cocky. At some point Kurt gets a text and starts playing with his phone, ignoring them. _Well it's not like he has any idea about video games anyway._

Apparently Finn's curiosity gets the better of him though, "Whosat?"

"David. He's freaking out a little about having to come back to McKinley next week. He's worried about what to do if he runs into Azimio or any of the other assholes that used to be his friends. My pieces of sage wisdom are all about a four of ten on the helpful scale. Suggestions of doing what I did were sneered at."

"Well to be fair, if you told him to dress up like Lady Gaga, give a speech about the joys of being different, then tell them to hit him, yeah, that's not helpful at all." Finn replies.

"Oh god, I forgot about that." Noah comes stumbling in, clearly rumpled from a nap. He glares at Kurt, who gets the hint and stands up so Noah can sit down. Once he does, seemingly just to annoy the mohawked boy, Kurt sits on his lap but puts his feet up on Sam's, who just laughs.

"Wait no, please tell me someone got pictures of Hummel dressed as Lady Gaga?" Sebastian has trouble picturing it, but he's fairly sure it's the most he's ever wanted to see something, because, seriously?

"Yeah, no, they totally did. It was before my time so I needed visual proof too. The girls, plus Kurt, dressed as Lady Gaga and the boys dressed as Kiss." Sam has a huge grin on his face. "I'll bring proof home next weekend."

"You guys are possibly the worst friends ever. Did you all forget the original point? And no! It wasn't me in heels, Noah! David needs help next week dealing with the football and hockey teams. He has to come back to school to do his tests. It's the first time he's been back since he was outed. He says 'hey', by the way."

"Hey back... Well, he only has to stick around for a day, right? He has to go through tests... and it's almost the end of the year. If we explained all this to Coach Sylvester, she'd probably give us notes to be excused five minutes early from classes that day so we could walk with him. Especially if her favorite former Cheerio asked. She still owes you for nationals, sophomore year. If at least two of us were with him at all times, they wouldn't be able to do much more than run their mouths. And as fun as it is to watch them try to figure out your witty comebacks, you don't count as one of the two, Princess. You're gonna cling to Karofsky like a burr all day, for emotional support or whatever, but at least two of the rest of us should meet up with him from class to class."

Kurt seems torn between impressed at his plan and offended at being considered no help in a fight. Sebastian thinks that's ridiculous. _Of course he'd be useless in a fight, what the hell would he do? Cut them with cuticle scissors?_

Kurt finally settles on, "Okay, fine. But you're right, I'm going to stick to his side all day. I can get permission from my teachers to miss a day, this close to the end it's all review and I've been reading a book in most of my classes for weeks. And I'll talk to Coach Sue, get notes for the three of you, Blaine, Mike, and Artie. You guys can work it out and take shifts. We'll stay in the library between his quizzes, the librarian has a soft spot for me because I actually read things besides Twilight and Hunger Games."

He goes back to texting Dave and the rest of the boys get sucked back in to CoD. A few minutes go by in silence and then Kurt is laughing, Noah goes to read over his shoulder and scoffs. Tightening his arms around Kurt, the mohawked teen mumbles something under his breath that earns him a smack from Kurt. "Oh, shut up Noah. Like you haven't made similar comments. In fact, memory serves, after that performance, you went to great lengths to offer to, and I quote, 'Rid me of that pesky virginity problem'."

"Hey! We weren't really friends yet! And seriously, name one person that didn't want to save you from virginity when you wore that uniform!"

With slightly awing timing, Kurt points at Finn at the same time as Finn shoots his hand up in the air. Sebastian is further confused when Kurt giggles and says, "Aww, remember how heart broken I was? I was so convinced that I could trick him into dating me back then. Little did I know that by the time I graduated, between drunken glee parties and closeted bullies, I'd be kiss-raped by half the football team. Every gay boy's wet dream. Except, ewww."

Sam and Noah both look offended. "Why 'ewww'? That's not cool man."

"Oh no, Sam. Not cool is being cornered by a boy reeking of many kinds of alcohol and being slobbered on in the sloppiest ways possible. And that actually goes for both of you. As terrifying as I found it at the time, David has you both beat in the kiss-rape department." A few minutes later he gets a chime and looks down, laughing, "To which he is now gloating." A few more minutes of pixelated carnage and texting later, Kurt says, "Ugh. He thought I meant Quinn when I said Sue's fave ex Cheerio."

"Close but no cigar, she's not half as territorial over Quinn as she is over you."

"Don't get me started on Quinn, Noah. I'm a bit disappointed in her after the whole prom thing."

Sam looks confused, "Uh, dude... you mean when she stood up? That's fucked up man."

"No! I mean her using her wheelchair to get votes, and then when it didn't work, she chose the middle of Rachel's queen dance to stand up. You know I'm glad she's recovering, but did she have to take that moment from Rachel?"

"You're just jealous the prom king actually danced with Rachel. After la-" Noah is suddenly cut off by Kurt reaching up and pinching his ear, pulling him down so Kurt can whisper angrily. "Okay, okay, God, I'm sorry! I'll shut up."

Kurt glares at him, but eventually turns back to the rest of the room, "Seriously though, I'm a bit disappointed in how no one has ever called Quinn out on her shit before. Leaving the whole wheelchair insensitivity thing alone, how she treated all of you is appalling. She spent the past three years taking turns on which of you she'd mess with, cheating on two of you with each other, tearing Noah down anytime she had a moment free, and that's not even mentioning her back and forth over Beth. Giving her up and then turning around and being all 'Where oh where could my baby be?', then going back to considering the whole thing a huge mistake. I'm so over her bullshit."

There's a few seconds of silence and then Finn's confused, "Did you just make a Pearl Jam reference?"

"Actually that's a cover, but close enough. Blame Noah. He's a horrible influence on my musical references."

Actually, he looks a bit smug. "Anything to get you away from show tunes and Brittany Spears. Although I do miss the days of corsets, skirts, and leggings. You've been wearing pants almost exclusively lately. Something I said, Princess?"

Sebastian is surprised when he catches a brief glance in his direction from Kurt, so quick he's the only one that noticed. "No, Noah, wasn't your fault, I just didn't feel like perpetuating the stereotype any more than I have to. Thank you for what you did at school yesterday though, I didn't get a chance to tell you and then I got distracted, but I appreciate it."

"Hey, if you can wear a kilt to prom, I can rock a dress in glee club, especially if it gets Sue off your back."

"You were possibly the ugliest girl I've ever seen though dude, never do that again." Sam shudders.

"Whatever man, I'm awesome. I could totally be a girl if I wanted to."

Kurt, Sam, **and** Finn say, "No you couldn't." _What the ever loving fuck are they talking about? Do I even want to know? I'm actually afraid to ask. And did he just say Kurt wore a kilt to prom? What the fuck?_

Finn finally looks away from the TV and notices how his friends and brother are sitting, with Sam rubbing Kurt's calf between spawn times, and says, "Okay dudes, what the hell. Have you noticed how gay and cuddly you've gotten? How did you manage to turn the straightest dude in school into your cuddle buddy?"

Although the question is clearly about Noah and meant for Kurt, Sam says, "Actually, I think this is all Puck's fault. He's the real cuddle whore."

Having heard some stories about Puck while Kurt was up in his room with Noah, Sebastian can't help but be confused. All he's heard about 'Puck', _Whoever he is, and what kind of name is that anyway?_ , is that he's a well known Sex God, and a bit of a manwhore. A straight version of Sebastian. He's also supposed to be a badass. He'd gotten the Quinn chick knocked up, and slept with most of the cheerleaders, Cheerios as it were. He'd been to juvie and then was temporarily neutered by something called a Zizes? How is Kurt cuddling with Noah and Sam, with no reservations, Puck's fault?

Noah speaks up, "Shut up, Finn, you're just jealous because Kurt gives us more cuddles than you. That's what you get for being a jerk back in the day."

"Oh really, dumpster tosser? You have something to say about being a jerk in the past? Please, tell me more." Kurt says, turning to Noah, who has the grace to turn sheepish at Kurt's bitchface.

"Um... I love you?"

All that earns him is a smack from Kurt and snickers from everyone else. Even Sebastian has to admit it's rather funny to see such a strong guy shrink in on himself when faced with a pissed off Kurt, even if he is, again, confused by the topic at hand. _Dumpster tosser?_ Having heard about the bullying at their school when Blaine first told him about the slushies, he knows that some kids get tossed into the dumpsters, was Noah the one doing it? _How the hell did they go from_ _ **that**_ _to_ _ **this**_ _?_

At some point Kurt had stopped texting and he turns to Noah, who looks away from watching Sam decimating Sebastian and Finn. "We didn't really get a chance to talk about it, but you have heard about the deal with the garage right? Are you okay with it?"

"I guess so, Princess, but I don't know how much help I'll be. Unlike some people I wasn't raised in coveralls. I can work on my own truck and some basic models but you know I don't know anything about foreign makes or the newer models."

"I'll be teaching you! Tomorrow, after my coffee date with Blaine, we'll go to the garage and start clearing out some of the work Dad let back up, if you have questions, just ask. It won't take you long to get it. You can do this Noah, you're smart and good with cars, stop beating yourself up." Kurt gives him a hug, pointedly ignoring the boys still trying to blow each other up.

"Fine, fine, it's not like I want to be a pool cleaner forever, especially since Finn refuses to go with me. And since I probably won't be graduating, I can keep working there after school and on weekends next year."

Before Kurt gets a chance to respond they hear the front door open. Sebastian turns to see Burt coming in, still slightly stained with oil. He sighs heavily when he sees Noah. "Really Puckerman? Less than six hours after I give the okay for you to come back, not only are you here, but he's in your lap? That's the first thing I get to see coming home after work?"

Kurt frowns at his dad before adopting his bitchface again, "Oh come off it Dad, would you rather us be up in my room? We can always relocate if you're uncomfortable."

Probably noticing that Noah looks a bit too hopeful for that possibility, Burt just mutters to himself, putting his keys on the hook and moving toward the kitchen. When he hears Finn and Sam laughing and joking about how Kurt has Burt wrapped around his finger, Burt turns back,

"Go ahead and laugh it up guys, just remember, with him back in the house the truce is off. And you know who's side he'll take." Smiling widely at the looks of horror on Finn and Sam's faces, Burt goes to the sink to scrub the oil off his hands.

"Truce? Princess, you didn't?! How could you concede?! After all the work I put in?!" Noah looks legitimately alarmed and upset.

"That's easy for you to say Noah, I'm not made for things like this! Besides, I had Sam on my side, at least a little, so it was manageable, and with the truce the harassment stopped."

"Well that ends now. What the hell Kurt? After everything we've gone through? No way. They're back on mornings."

"Like hell we are-"

"Not happening man-"

"Ugh, now look what you've done!" Kurt yells at his dad. The only response is evil laughter from the kitchen. Sebastian looks around the room, all four boys looking furious.

"Okay, what the hell, someone want to fill me in here?"

"Look here, new guy, you're gonna have to pick a side. If the truce is over, you have to choose." Sam looks like he's waiting on Sebastian to tell him he's pregnant or something. _How did it get this serious this quickly?_

"I really have no idea what the hell you guys are talking about..."

"No, really, guys, he just got here yesterday and we were in a truce, he doesn't know. Sebastian, there's a bit of a situation that has arisen with having this many teenagers in the house. We all share one bathroom, the half down here doesn't count for showering and the master bath is off limits, on pain of death. Burt and Carole have left it up to us to figure out."

"Yeah, because they're heartless jerks who won't share." Finn says this fairly loudly, clearly so that Burt won't miss it.

"It started becoming a problem after Sam moved in but really took off when Noah started spending more time here, especially if he stays over on school nights. Luckily you're only here on the weekends, but you will be here Sunday nights, so you will have to pick a side."

...pick a side? What?

Seeing his confusion, Noah jumps in, "As I'm sure you can guess, Princess here takes quite a bit of time to groom. He takes retardedly long showers, has a skin thing he does every night and every morning, and of course there's the hair. All of that is just him. Add in manscaping and showering habits for three more guys and it got real obvious, real quick that lines needed to be drawn."

"Sam and I don't get up so easy in the mornings, so the last thing we want to do first thing in the morning is deal with showering. We'd have to get up earlier, and then we end up having to shower after gym class again anyway, which we both have in the mornings, but not first class. During football season we were showering three times a day because of this!" Finn's shouting now, and Sebastian has to bite his tongue to keep from laughing at how serious they're taking this.

Noah continued, "Right, so with four teenage boys, at least one of which would take an hour a day to shower if he could, sharing one bathroom and no one wanting to shower in the mornings, getting through nightly showers was taking over three hours every night. God forbid more than one person needed to actually use the bathroom, let's just say things weren't going great."

"So, why wouldn't Kurt just take his showers in the morning? If he's the one that needs more time and he wakes up early anyway...?" It seems fairly simple to Sebastian, but the other three boys almost fall off the couch laughing at the outrage on Kurt's face.

"How the hell am I supposed to moisturize if my hair and face aren't clean, meerkat? Not to mention with the products I put in my hair, I'd ruin my linens. No, if there's one person that **has** to shower at night, it's me. Even they don't dispute that anymore. That was a long week for everybody."

"Anyway, things quickly escalated into tricks and pranks when **he** came in to the picture." Sam is now openly glaring at Noah.

"God Sam, get over it! It was a weekend! By Monday your hair was back blonde."

"I'll get over it when you change your wallpaper, Puck! Isn't it bad enough that you put pink dye in my shampoo?! At least ditch the evidence! And for fuck's sake, stop showing people!"

"It shouldn't have even worked! Who gets so busy singing in the shower that they don't notice there's hair dye in the shampoo?!"

Before he gets a chance to really think it through, Sebastian says, "Wait a minute! Noah is Puck?!" This statement actually manages to stop Sam and Noah mid-argument. It also brings Burt back out of the kitchen, still holding a beer. Finn just blinks at him. Kurt is looking at him like he's wearing a fruit headdress. "What?!"

Everyone in the room dissolves into laughter. Finn does actually fall off the couch laughing this time.

"What?! The only person that's been calling him by name was Kurt, and he called him Noah!" Sebastian is now having an aneurism. He's sure of it. Suddenly he's trying to make everything he knows about Puck fit in with the image that Noah has presented since he got here. Somehow he just can't picture the mohawked teen as the badass Sam and Finn had talked about. _No wonder Rachel freaked out. Suddenly I'm not so sure I want to play chaperone between Lady Face and a 'Sex God'._

Burt recovers first, "Actually I called him Puckerman, which is his last name. Puck for short."

"Oh Jesus, that's hilarious. He had no idea. Yeah, sorry man, but hey, don't call him Noah. There's only like five people on the planet that are allowed to call him that without being egged, and two of those are his mom and sister." Sam is wiping away tears as he explains.

Finn scrunches his nose, "Yeah, it's really weird, apparently only people that he loves or makes out with can call him Noah."

Sebastian smirks, says "Well, I'm up for it if he is." and winks.

Burt groans, "Oh god, not another flirter. Seriously, can't you boys keep it in your pants?"

"Sorry Mr. Hummel. Actually can I talk to you for a minute? I heard from my père this morning."

"Sure, let's step outside for a second." As Burt heads for the door, Sebastian gets up and tosses the controller to Puck and follows Burt outside. They sit on the steps and Burt asks, "So, is your grandma okay?"

"Yeah, well, she's physically fine, mentally is another story. She lied to Père to get him to go to France. She just wanted him to take a break and didn't know how else to get him to take that much time off. Unfortunately, he's a pushover, and once he found out what was going on, he agreed to stay in Paris anyway as long as you agreed to look after me, since he already took the time off. He'll be lucky to keep his job at all if they find out he took that much time off just to run to Paris and play house with Grand-mère."

Burt laughs at this, scratching his head under his hat. "True, people may not take it well, but he's a good guy, and he never takes sick leave, so they probably won't begrudge him a month with his mother. So what you're asking is if you can stay anyway?" At Sebastian's nod Burt continues, "It's fine with me. Honestly at this point, what's one more boy in our house? After three, it's a mad house no matter what you do. You're welcome here as long as you need, kiddo. Same rules apply that I told you before though. No physical fighting, lights out by midnight on school nights, don't bring people in the house without asking, do your own laundry, help with chores when asked, and the master bath is off limits."

"Yeah, that one makes more sense now." Sebastian chuckles. "For the record, I wouldn't bring anyone here. The only people I'm close enough to even consider bringing here are Dave, Jeff and maybe Nick. All of which Kurt actually knows and is friends with too."

"What happened with all the stuff your dad used to tell me? He said you had some trouble finding your pants there for awhile. No judgment, as a father it's not what I'd want for any of my boys, and that includes you now, but I can't say I never did anything like that. So, I'm just wondering why it is that I don't have to worry about that anymore."

Sebastian sighs, "I'm assuming that Kurt has told you about Dave's... problems?" After he gets Burt's nod Sebastian says, "Well, I said some things to Dave I'm not proud of, and I was unnecessarily harsh to him because I was too wrapped up in 'losing my pants' to pay attention to what was going on around me. After I found out what happened, I just couldn't go to that bar anymore. I'd see him there, with that look on his face... Even trying to hook up with random guys at school or that I met out at the mall or whatever, I couldn't look them in the face anymore. Being the kind of guy that would tear down someone that was that easily bruised, and not caring what it did to them? I don't want to be that guy anymore."

Burt nods again and pats Sebastian on the shoulder, "Well that's very mature of you, kiddo. Most kids your age, even after something like that went down, wouldn't have gone to such great lengths to change. You're a good kid, Sebastian. I'm not really surprised, I like your dad quite a bit, and people in politics usually annoy the crap out of me. He's working for change and acceptance though, and I'm glad you take after him in that regard."

Sebastian smiles a little and nods, "Thank you sir."

"None of that, it's Burt. Now, that's enough mushy, girly stuff, let's go back inside. It's already too damn hot out here."

* * *

 

When they walk back in it's a little alarming that Sebastian is no longer shocked at Kurt growling in Finn's face about how important his body scrub is and how he won't be rushed through his nighttime rituals. "Looks like the bathroom wars are already back on, good luck son." With that, Burt makes a hasty retreat to his room, leaving the boys screaming at each other.

"Okay, so someone want to finish explaining the bathroom thing? I'm assuming there are demands that must be met or rules you guys follow? It can't be all out war because none of you have a shaved head."

"Don't think I haven't considered it. The only one that could pull off that look is Noah though, so I resist temptation." Kurt glares at Finn.

Sam speaks up, "So the rules... when we were on a truce, there were just three of us, so we all just took showers as quick as possible to save hot water and time, and it was first come, first serve. Clearly that won't work anymore. You're only here on the weekends, so you have it easy. Sunday nights will be the only ones you'll have to worry about. On the weekends Finn, Puck, and I will shower in the morning, leaving all night for Kurt to catch up on his scrubbing or whatever he does."

"We don't ask, it's just better that way." Finn supplies.

"It's the school nights that are the problem. It's still pretty much first come, first serve, which amounts to the first three to shower get warm water and whoever is left gets to freeze their balls off or take one in the morning. But there are hard set rules we govern inside of; Kurt must be one of the three to shower at night. Not only were his points valid, but frankly, Kurt is vicious when pissed off. Just trust us on this, don't screw him out of his night time shower." Sam shudders a little and he's not the only one, none of them look fond of the memories. Sebastian doesn't know whether to be amused or impressed that Kurt has scared the three jocks this badly.

"The other rules are; clean up after yourself, if you 'manscape' as Noah so charmingly put it, clean it up, none of us want to know what your junk looks like. Shut up Noah." Puck looks put out at his joke being ruined before it even had a chance, but he doesn't say anything, so Kurt continues, "Always remember to unlock both doors before coming out, it's an unfair advantage to leave one door locked so your roommate gets in first. A 'me' specific rule is that I do my moisturizing and most of my hair styling in my room at the vanity, not the bathroom mirror because it takes too long."

"We also all have to keep our hair styling products in our rooms, there's not enough shelf space for mousses, gels, pomades, and hairsprays. Shampoos and body washes are okay because a lot of us use the same stuff, the only exceptions being Sam's color treated shampoo, which is why the dye thing worked, and Kurt's stuff, which we aren't allowed to use." Finn looks proud of himself, probably for remembering all the product names. Sadly, Kurt also looks proud of him.

"Oh yeah, using Kurt's stuff is a mistake you only make once. He'll smell it on you and then it's all over." This surprisingly comes from Puck. _Wow, so even he isn't allowed to use it?_

Kurt scoffs, "It's expensive! And it's wasted on you guys. You use my products, then run out and shove your heads into football helmets."

"Hey! You used to wear one of those helmets too, Princess!"

This time he can't contain it, Sebastian bursts out laughing. "Oh you've got to be kidding. Lady Face was on the football team?! How the hell did that work?"

"Actually it was kind of badass. He won us our only game sophomore year. This was before even Karofsky joined the team and our coach was horrible. Kurt taught us a dance number and we used it to distract the opposing team. Then I passed to Puck who ran it in. Kurt broke the tie with the field goal." Finn smiles fondly at Kurt.

"Okay, I have to ask, what dance number?" Sebastian hears muttering from all three of the boys involved and says, "What was that?"

"It was 'Single Ladies' okay? My dad caught me making a music video in my room with Brittany and Tina. I hadn't told him I was gay yet so when he caught me dancing and singing to Beyoncé while wearing a black leotard, I panicked. Brittany noticed and told him I was on the football team. So I didn't really have a choice. Turns out I'm a good kicker or whatever." Kurt shrugs like all of this isn't a big deal.

"He was an awesome kicker, and I gave him so much shit over that stupid dance too. I'm sorry about that, Princess." Puck leans over and kisses Kurt on the cheek, which he wipes off while blushing slightly. Sebastian stares at Kurt with eyes squinted, eventually saying,

"Okay, only one question left, and then I'll let this go." Kurt looks at Sebastian warily. "Where's the tape?"

Kurt starts shifting his eyes around the room. "What tape? There is no tape."

"Lies. You said you were making a music video. That means somewhere, probably in this house, there is a tape of you in a black leotard dancing to Beyoncé. Where's the tape, Kurt?"

"Nowhere, I threw it away." He looks slightly frantic and Sebastian can tell he's lying. Apparently he's not alone.

Puck has a manic look about him as he sits up, "Oh my God. How did I never realize this?! Do you think if I hold him down you can go and find it? It's gotta be in his room somewhere, and he'll never show us."

Sebastian smirks, "I can probably already tell you where it is, but it won't matter. It's locked."

This actually makes Puck smile, which is confusing. When he goes to say something Kurt slaps a hand over Puck's mouth. "This conversation is over. One more word, Puck, and you can sleep in Finn's room tonight."

Ignoring Puck's undignified squawk, Kurt gets up and goes to find his dad, to ask what they're having for dinner tonight. Sebastian turns to Puck and raises an eyebrow. "Sorry man, not worth it. Finn snores, and Sam kicks." Sebastian just shakes his head. _Yeah,_ _ **that's**_ _the reason you don't want to be kicked out of Hummel's bed._ _ **Right.**_


	5. Chapter 5

[Kurt]

They had pizza for dinner, Burt figuring that Carole would be too tired to cook after working all day. Kurt was grateful. Considering he'd made the last two family meals and would be doing breakfast in the morning, the respite was appreciated. Once everyone had eaten their fill they piled into the living room to watch a movie. Saturday was an unofficial family night, where as Friday was very much official. If you had no plans, Burt and Carole would be around to hang, if you did, no harm no foul, that just gave them an excuse to make out on the couch like teenagers. Finn has been unlucky enough to walk in on them having heavy make out sessions this way four times so far. He's not happy about it.

Most kids wouldn't choose to spend their Friday and Saturday nights hanging out with their parents, or quasi-parents as the case may be, but these weren't normal parents. Burt was supportive and honest, with a mostly even temper. Teenagers felt comfortable around him and opened up to him easily. Carole was just the quintessential loving mom. Any time you needed a hug or just someone to baby you a bit, she was perfect for it and always willing. But, although no one was talking about it, the main reason all the boys stayed home that Saturday was because they didn't have many left together. Soon enough, Finn and Kurt would be gone.

So they'd spent the night in, Burt and Carole snuggled up on the couch with Finn sitting on the other end, Sebastian sitting sideways in the arm chair, and Sam, Noah and Kurt sitting in the floor in a pile of cuddles that Finn liked to poke his feet into every now and then, just to break it up a little. Noah especially found him annoying, punching Finn in the leg when he did it. Burt was secretly thankful for Finn's efforts.

They watched the newer Marvel movies in order, starting with Iron Man, so they could go see the Avengers next week in theater. When they get to Captain America, Kurt decides to bow out and go start the showering process, hoping to put off the fighting for as long as possible. Besides, he's seen it. Many times. He lives with Sam.

The first thing he does is take advantage of all of the boys being distracted and opens his locked chest in the closet. He knows that Sebastian will have figured out that's where he hides everything. If that information gets back to Noah, it's over. _I've seen him open dead bolts, a memorabilia trunk would be a joke._

Kurt takes out the tape and re-locks the trunk. Most of the things in there are fine for Noah to find, he knows about them all. Looking around the room for a better hiding place, Kurt eventually decides that out in plain sight is better than locked away, because that's what they'd expect now. Kurt tapes the music video to the bottom of the bedside table in the back corner. He needs to get rid of it this week while neither Sebastian or Noah are in the house but this will have to do for now.

Once he's double checked that you can't see it from either bed or standing anywhere in the room, Kurt finally moves to gather everything he needs for a long shower. He'd been rushed the past couple days and needs to catch up on everything. _I know I'm not heartthrob material like all the other boys in the house, so I have to take care of the few assets I have._

When he steps out of the bathroom with his supplies under his arm he notices that it's much later than he thought it was. After putting away his stuff he sits down at his vanity to do his moisturizing routine, already wearing his black yoga pants and overlarge shirt that he'll sleep in. He's just finishing up when the door opens and Noah and Sebastian come in, talking about the obvious sequel that will be made about the Captain's best friend.

Kurt finishes and stands up, revealing the faded red shirt with black sleeves and 'McKinley Titans' written on it and is bracing himself for comments when he hears Noah snort and ask, "Just how many of my shirts have you stolen, Princess? Don't think I didn't see my black shirt at the top of your hamper. No wonder I can never find my clothes when I go home."

Kurt scoffs, "I only have three or four, and please, this shirt wouldn't fit you anymore, I stole it last year. It's soft... and it reminds me of transferring back to McKinley, coming home. It's the shirt you wore during the Barbra-vention my first full day back." Kurt looks sheepish for a second before snapping out of it and putting his bitchface on, "You can't have it back."

"Chill, babe, it's fine. Just take me to buy replacements before you run off to New York this summer or you're gonna leave me naked here."

Sebastian finally manages to walk around Noah, muttering, "What's the downside?" before going to get clothes to sleep in out of the dresser. Eventually, Sebastian says, "I'm gonna go ahead and shower, everyone else will go in the morning, right? Since it's Saturday?"

"Sure, sure." Noah turns to Kurt, "Finn and Sam got caught up playing Xbox so they won't even be up for awhile. Personally I need the sleep though, so I bailed."

Kurt frowns at the continued reference to Noah not sleeping well. After Sebastian closes the bathroom door, Kurt puts his phone on the charger by the bed so he can hear the alarm in the morning and crawls beneath the duvet. Once he's settled he looks up at Noah, waiting on him to join him.

For once Noah actually looks a little nervous. "Are you sure this won't be awkward with Sebastian in here? He's not gonna be all weird about it right?"

Kurt giggles, "It's a little late to be concerned about that now, Noah, you blew that out of the water when you pulled me into your lap as soon as I came in the door. Besides he doesn't really know you, so it's not like he's freaking out about your reputation. Hell, his reputation isn't much better, he's you but with guys." Suddenly Kurt looks a little worried and drops his head, "If you're, um, not comfortable sleeping here with him around, that's okay... you can sleep in Finn's room or the couch. Just because we fell into this a few months ago doesn't mean I expect it..."

Actually, he's still a little surprised Noah has been this open about their cuddling. Before today the only people who had seen that side of Noah were the Hudmels and Sam. He'd seemed to not even notice Sebastian and Rachel were in the room today though. _Maybe he regrets that? I'm sure Rachel won't say anything, and Sebastian has no need to, but maybe he's worried about it anyway?_

Before Kurt can really start to second guess himself, he's pulled out of his thoughts by Noah climbing into bed wearing only his boxers. Kurt had been so busy working up a freak out that he hadn't noticed him shucking his clothes. Noah lays down and pulls Kurt to him, hugging him close and kissing the top of his head.

"You should know better, Princess. That wasn't my problem at all, at this point I'm so wrapped up in how I'm going to handle you not being here next year, that I'd hold you on my lap at lunch if I didn't think the hobbit would tear my head off. I was just worried about making the situation worse for you and Seb. Not sure how to deal with another guy being in here while we sleep."

Kurt smiles and buries his face into Noah's neck. "Okay, I get it. But he can't possibly care. Like I said, he's probably slept with as many guys as you have girls, I'm sure he couldn't care less that you climb into my bed at night. Hell, he probably wishes he could toss me out and take my place. He has been flirting with you."

Noah laughs and pulls Kurt closer, "You're adorable, babe. Getting all jealous of a couple comments about my admitted awesomeness. But no, fucking is different from sleeping with someone. If he really is like me he's probably never spent the night in someone's bed. We tend to sneak out before they can get attached. You're the first non-bro that I've slept with."

Kurt fake pouts, "Are you saying we aren't friends, Noah?"

"There's a difference between a friend and a bro. A friend is someone you talk to when you need help or someone you can cuddle with, a bro is someone you punch on the arm when they get laid and demand for details."

"Oh Gaga, I just imagined you spilling to Finn about your feelings and asking me for blowjob tips." Kurt is still entrenched in a giggle-fit when Sebastian steps out of the bathroom. Noah can tell by the raised eyebrow that he'd caught the end of Kurt's sentence so he gives him a smirk and a huge wink.

When Kurt finally recovers, he notices a shirtless Sebastian sitting down on the bed wearing a pair of jersey shorts and plugging in his own phone. _Okay, so he's an asshole, he's still pretty hot. Especially when he keeps his mouth shut._

He can tell when he glances at Noah that the Jewish boy has guessed what he was thinking. Blushing more than he'd care to admit to, Kurt leans over and turns off his lamp, leaving the only light in the room to be the floor lamp by Sebastian's bed.

When Sebastian turns off his light too, Kurt is a little surprised at Noah's, "Night guys." but even more surprised by Sebastian's,

"G'night."

"... 'night."

_Weirdest day_ _**ever** _ _._

* * *

 

When Kurt blinks his eyes open the next morning, he's a little shocked. _I can't remember the last time I slept all the way through the night without waking up to at least turn over._

Actually, that's not true. He can remember, it was the morning he'd woken up to his dad yelling from the bedroom doorway, wanting to know why there was a naked Puckerman in his son's bed. To be fair, it's a valid concern for a man that is still trying to be sensitive about said son's recent break up. Going from thinking your son is heartbroken to finding a naked boy in his bed would be a little shocking to anyone. _Hard to believe that was only two and a half weeks ago... if we couldn't go three weeks without each other how the hell are we going to handle the rest of our lives with me in New York?_

Suddenly depressed, Kurt snuggles into Noah's warm chest and clings to him a bit. Eventually curiosity gets the better of him and he leans up to look over at the alarm clock. "Oh shit! Dammit!" _I forgot to set an alarm!_

Kurt manages to scramble out of Noah's hold and jump over him, darting around the room to grab the necessary pots and tubes for a two minute cleanse and running into the bathroom. It's only as the door slams that he realizes he was probably being a little too loud and that he'd have woken up at least his roommates, if not Finn and Sam too.

Sure enough, when he steps back out of the bathroom, moving as quick as he can, Sebastian has pulled the covers over his head, only his eyes visible as he glares at Kurt. Noah is sitting up and stretching. He grabs Kurt's phone off the table and glances at the alarm clock on the dresser. 8:53am.

Kurt can tell that he's texting but can't be bothered to ask about it. Quickly grabbing the first pair of pants in his closet, and slipping out of his yoga pants, he starts wiggling into the jeans. Kurt quickly steps into his closet while taking off his shirt, and picks out a button up shirt with a printed design on the shoulder. He throws on a last minute scarf, and grabs his go-to Doc Marten boots, tightening the laces on his calves. As he grabs his wallet and keys, Noah hands him his phone, "I told the hobbit you were running late, he said take your time."

Kurt says, "Thanks hun, you're a life saver. I'll make waffles when I get back. If you guys stay up and are too hungry to wait, I bought muffins yesterday, Finn put them in the kitchen. Put pants on before you go downstairs or Dad will kick you out again. Love you, I won't stay gone too long, don't fight. Don't start the wars, you know it will happen soon enough." Kurt leans down and kisses Noah quickly on the cheek and tosses out, "Sorry I woke you up Sebastian!" and he runs out the door.

As he quickly makes his way outside he scrolls through the texts that have been left up on his phone,

_**To Blaine: hey hobbit, Kurts runnin late. hes tryin to squeeze his ass into the tightest pants he owns that arent gold** _ _**.** _

_From Blaine: hey Puck, no rush, good to know tho. Was worried he was standing me up D=_

_**To Blaine: whoa, its not a date rite? Ur just talkin bout the break up and being friends rite?** _

_From Blaine: Yeah, it's a figure of speech Puck lol_

_**To Blaine: good, bc I'm not losin him before I have to.** _

_From Blaine:_ _LOL that's implying that you ever cared before that he was taken, what would stop you now?_

_**To Blaine: Point. He's putting on his bitchboots so he'll be there soon** _

_From Blaine:_ _k, np, thanks for tellin me!_

Kurt shakes his head at his friends and jumps in the Navigator. When he pulls up outside the Lima Bean, he's actually surprised to see Blaine waiting for him, figuring he'd be inside already. As he steps out of the Nav, Blaine runs up and hugs him saying, "God I've missed you. You've been avoiding me like the plague, so I figured maybe you were still upset or something."

"No, I've missed you too, I've been staying away, giving you space to... breathe." The unspoken 'get over me' is heard loud and clear, Kurt slightly awkward at how pompous that makes him sound.

"I appreciate that, but honestly, getting over the romantic side of things didn't take as long as I thought it would. I just really missed hanging out with you and talking to you." By this point they'd managed to separate and head inside, standing in line to order. Blaine looks around a little, obviously looking for someone. "We should have picked somewhere else. I know you don't like coming here in case we get interrupted by Sebastian. Granted, it's a little early on a Sunday for him to show up..."

Kurt can't help but snort at this, "Oh, it is too early. He's still curled up in bed with a blanket over his head. Although he did wake up enough to glare at me as I as dressing." Kurt enjoys the way Blaine's eyes bug out at this information.

"What?! He's in your bed?! Didn't **Puck** just text me from your bed? Something you'd like to share with the class there, Kurt?" Blaine looks down right scandalized. He's not alone. Everyone within a ten foot radius has stopped to stare at them.

Kurt blushes like crazy, "Oh my God, Blaine. Overreact much? No, I didn't sleep with Sebastian Smythe! And I definitely didn't have a threesome with him and Noah. Jesus." Kurt takes his coffee as it's called and goes to sit at a table, waiting until Blaine has joined him before saying, "It's a long story that involves his family, misunderstandings and blackmail, but the short of it is, for at least a little while, Sebastian is staying with us when he isn't at Dalton. Our fathers are friends, apparently."

Blaine takes a minute to process this, "Okay, so if you didn't sleep with him, why was he in your bed watching you get dressed? Which Puck was also doing, I'd like to point out. He commented on your pants."

Blushing again, damn his pale skin, Kurt says, "He wasn't in my bed, he was in his. We put the roll-away in the corner where the chair was. Noah was in my bed, admittedly, which you know about, so I don't have to explain."

"Actually, I'm not sure that's true. It was one thing when we were dating, but I'm not sure what's happened now that I'm out of the picture." Blaine's smirk isn't appreciated.

"Nothing has changed, he was coming over a bit more often, but that's it. Then Dad found him one morning and didn't like what he saw **at all** , so he banned him from the house. Last night was actually the first night he was allowed back." Kurt sips his coffee, watching the gears turn in Blaine's mind.

"Okay, so what did your dad see that made him freak out? Puck's been sleeping in your room for months."

Kurt sighs heavily, "He wanted to know if I was up and would make breakfast because Carole got called in to work a double. He walked in to find out that Noah can't sleep wearing pants. I guess he was under the impression that because Noah is 'straight', he'd be wearing a chastity belt or something. Instead he found us curled up in bed with seemingly nothing on under the small strip of blanket that was covering him. He panicked, and ran back out in the hall, yelling at Noah to get up, put pants on and get out of his house."

Kurt glares at Blaine, who is now doubled over in giggles. "Sorry, sorry! I know, you must have had such a rough time convincing him **that** was innocent. Not to mention how you guys survived the time apart."

"Ugh, you have no idea. I slept very little, if at all, the passed three weeks. It's why I overslept today, this is the first time I've slept more than four hours without waking up since the ban started. And you don't want to know how Noah handled it. Not well."

"Aww, poor Puck. I could tell he was off in school, that you both were. But... I didn't know what his issues were, and I figured you were just taking the break up really hard, which made me feel so bad. After a couple weeks, aside from the occasional sense of wrongness when I thought about telling you something, I've managed to handle it pretty well." Blaine looks very guilty at this admission, so Kurt hurries to say,

"No, God, yeah, me too. Don't feel bad about it. I guess this just goes to prove the reason our relationship wasn't working is because we really were just very close friends."

"Definitely! Although I will miss the sex." Blaine replies with an evil grin. Kurt flushes and smacks his arm.

"I guess we'll just have to find you a new man then." They sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Kurt remembers, "Oh! While I have you here, there's something I want to ask you about school tomorrow. It's about Dave."

* * *

 

When Kurt comes home it's still not quite 11am. He runs upstairs to give coffees to Noah and Sebastian. When he walks in the door, he finds them both sitting in their respective beds, Sebastian with his back against the window and Noah leaning back on his hands, talking.

"Hey babe, how did it go with the hobbit?" Noah reaches over to take his coffee from Kurt, kissing him on the cheek and murmuring a quick "Thanks."

Kurt just smiles and walks over to hand Sebastian his, not noticing the look of surprise on his face, him only just now realizing that Kurt knows his coffee order. He was a bit too preoccupied to notice yesterday.

"It actually went great," Kurt moves back over and sits down in front of Noah, leaning back into his chest. "He seems to have handled everything about the same as me, soul crushing sadness for the longest five minutes in the world, then just an ache where a friendship should be. So, we should be good now. He's agreed to help with David, so that's one more person on his side who didn't used to be."

"Meh, his dislike of Karofsky was never rational. He just didn't like that he wasn't as romantic as the gorilla was. And to be fair, he was already dealing with us, he really didn't need another guy coming in and trying to steal your affection." Noah looks smug, which earns him a pinch to an exposed thigh.

"Yes, well, look how that turned out. Besides, David didn't really like me. I was just the only gay guy he knew back then." Kurt shrugs and yawns, and he's a little surprised that he almost feels like going back to sleep. Noah notices though,

"Oh no you don't, Princess, get your perky little ass downstairs and make me waffles. You can nap later." Noah starts to mercilessly poke him in the side until Kurt grunts and stands up.

"Fine, fine. I'll go, but I can't nap later, after breakfast we're hitting the garage. I have to teach you as much as I can, as quick as I can." Kurt steps over to his closet, bending down to take off his boots and then putting his scarf away too. Kurt may miss Sebastian staring at Kurt's previously mentioned ass but Noah doesn't. When Seb finally realizes what he's doing he looks over at Puck to see him grinning widely at Sebastian. Before either can comment Kurt says, "And no matter how much you may wish otherwise Noah, you can't actually make me stay barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. For many reasons."

As Kurt flounces out the bedroom door, Noah yells, "But I can keep trying though, right?"

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian is left alone in the room, Puck having gone down to talk to Kurt while he cooks, he gets up and adjusts his finally flagging erection. _Damn skinny jeans. I mean, it's just Lady Face for fuck's sake. This shouldn't even be a problem. I have got to find someone to hook up with. Maybe I could try one of those fucking relationship things I've heard so much about? At least it would get me out of this house sometimes._

Changing into jeans, a white button down shirt and a thin, pale green sweater, Sebastian heads down to find out if breakfast is done. He wishes he was still surprised that Kurt isn't just standing in front of the toaster with a box of Eggos, but sadly, he's come to accept the fact that Kurt Hummel is an awesome cook. He's been actively biting his tongue to keep both moans of delight and 'little woman' comments from slipping out. And then, of all people to finally make a wifey reference, it's Kurt himself. _Will wonders never cease?_

He'd stopped to yawn and stretch at the bottom of the stairs when he runs into Sam, just coming down from his room. Seeing Sebastian, he stops and moves closer, whispering, "By the way, new kid, don't eat the last waffle." When he starts to walk away with no explanation, Sebastian sputters,

"Wait, what?"

Turning to make sure no one in the kitchen is close enough to hear them, Sam repeats, "Don't eat the last waffle if there's only one left. It's Puck's. Trust me on this." And then, Sam just walks away.

 _Seriously, are these people on meds? They should be._ He walks further into the room, still confused, to see Kurt setting an over full platter of homemade blueberry waffles on the kitchen table. Sebastian walks up to table and watches the men around him fighting over the syrup bottle and just shakes his head. _Whatever. I'm not asking._

When he notices that Carole is still in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, drinking coffee, while Kurt moves from the waffle iron to the stove and getting out more ingredients, he goes to investigate. "Why are you still cooking? There looks like there's enough for an army."

Kurt turns to look at Sebastian, clearly checking over his clothes before nodding slightly in approval. Before he gets a chance to respond, Carole speaks up, "The last few meals have been kind of heavy for us so Kurt is making us some egg white omelets. The men wouldn't touch them with a stick."

Kurt mutters, "Plebeians." and continues to whisk things in a bowl.

Sebastian debates with himself for a minute before finally asking, "Don't suppose you could stretch that to another serving could you?"

Kurt turns shocked eyes on him and says, "Easily enough, but wouldn't you rather have the waffles?"

Rubbing the back of his neck, Sebastian says, "Not really, then I'd have to workout an extra hour and I really hate working out as it is. I'm surprised Sam and Puck are eating them, actually."

Carole laughs, "Oh no, those two are total gym rats, they love working out. We actually had problems getting Sam to eat like a regular teenage boy at first, but eventually he figured out the more he ate the more he could work off, and it's been smooth sailing ever since."

"Easy for you to say. Every time I turn around one of them has puppy eyes and a spatula. Finn's the worst. He's shameless." Kurt shakes his head and goes back to the fridge, gathering a few more eggs. Sebastian grabs himself a cup of coffee and tunes out the conversations while waiting on his omelet. He's trying to decide what to do today when he's snapped out of thought by Kurt passing him a plate.

He grunts and thanks him, going to sit down at the table, noticing that most of the waffles are gone already. _Jeez, you'd think they didn't just stuff themselves with pizza last night._

When Kurt and Carole join them a few minutes later, Kurt adds a muffin and a banana to his plate without comment and goes back to his own breakfast, loaded with berries and an omelet. Sebastian shrugs and just goes with it, eventually eating everything, not seeing Burt and Carole exchanging a knowing look, Carole being much more amused by the silent exchange.

As he goes to take his dishes back into the kitchen, Sam cuts him off, whisking his plate away and heading for the sink. He calls over his shoulder, "Tonight you either help with dinner or do dishes, new kid." Then he and Finn commence to clean up the mess left behind, as small as it is. Of course Kurt is the type that cleans as he cooks.

Sebastian nods and heads back upstairs, eventually deciding to just play games for a bit. He's in the middle of running Squall through the Fire Cavern on Final Fantasy VIII when Puck and Kurt come back up. They both stop and stare at the TV in shock. Puck, not knowing much about Final Fantasy games just shakes his head and goes to change. Might as well put off showering, he's just going to get gross at the garage and he'd showered before he came over yesterday.

Kurt however is still watching Sebastian like he's a new species of bird that flew through his window. "You play rpgs?"

Sebastian pauses the game and looks up at Kurt in confusion, surprised Kurt even knows the term 'rpgs'. Eventually he warily responds with, "I thought that would be obvious by the fact that I owned a PS3, not an Xbox..."

Kurt flushes, eventually saying, "Actually I didn't notice what kind of console you had, I've been a bit busy."

Puck speaks up, looking at the paused battle between two heavily pixelated characters and a giant... well, he's not sure what it is. It looks kind of like Beast from that Disney movie his sister watches. "That game looks old as hell, if you have a PS3, why don't you play a new one? Didn't they just come out with a new Final Fantasy? Like a sequel of the last one?"

Puck almost skitters back at the look he receives from both of them. Kurt pops a hip out and crosses his arm, hissing, "You can't compare the old PS1 Final Fantasys to the new ones. It's not even close to the same quality. Everything after X, and that includes it's "sequel", was complete crap. XIII and it's sequel are almost unplayable. Unless you're a four year old. Then sure, it all works out."

Kurt glares at Puck for his stupidity and Sebastian has only just managed to pick his jaw up off the floor by the time he turns back to him. "My favorite is IX, which you can probably guess because it's the girly one, but I loved VIII too. Which is about 75% Squall's fault. He's just too pretty. The other 25% is Seifer's, because who doesn't love a badass? Anyway, we've got to get going if we're going to get any work done. Good luck in Dollet, I hate that part."

Kurt and Puck slip on some shoes, Kurt decidedly not wearing the hot-as-fuck hooker boots, and head out, Puck tossing him a wave as they go. Sebastian sits in stunned silence until long after he hears the navigator pull away out front. Eventually he digs out his phone,

_**To Bear Cub: how did I not know that Hummel plays video games? And how the hell did that happen anyway?** _

Not having anything else to do but wait for Dave to wake up, he goes back to his game. He's just made it passed the SeeD exam and is leveling up his characters outside Balamb when he gets a response.

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: lmao plz tell me Fancy schooled u. That wld make my day._

_**To Bear Cub: Shut up. No, he didn't, well... sort of? He schooled Puck and I was just a witness. Did you know he plays FF?** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Lol actually ya, I knew. he also played WoW, which I had fun teasing him about when he told me._

_**To Bear Cub: …** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: NO. not u too?!_

_**To Bear Cub: Shut up! It was freshman year! I was stuck in Paris and I only knew broken French! I just spent the whole time trolling ppl in trade chat. What did he do? Did he even make it out of the barrens?** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Idk wtf that means dude, all I know is he got really uptight abt it. He only playd for about 6 months, then his dad made him stop. he was like that penny chick from big bang theory._

_**To Bear Cub: Lmao o god, Kurt Hummel with cheetos in his hair... but yea, that happens a lot when normal kids get sucked into world of warcrack.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Lol u just called Fancy 'normal'. =D_

_**To Bear Cub: … shut up. Hey, I'm bored, I'm tired of leveling and I hate timber, give me something to do.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Um, go have gamer nerd talks with Fancy about ur dwarf or whatever?_

_**To Bear Cub: Can't, he's working at the garage with Puck, and I was horde, asshole. Also, that sounded dirty.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: What u said or what I said?_

_**To Bear Cub: ...both. And you're not helping.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Shit dude, I dunno, u could come over here and help me get rdy for my tests tomorrow?_

_**To Bear Cub: Sounds better than anything I could come up with, text me your address or directions or something.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Was kidding, I'm actually watching Jay and Silent Bob, I've studied as much as I'm gonna, I really don't care anymore._

_**To Bear Cub: Well fuck it, I'll watch with you then, I'm bored as hell.** _

_From_ _Bear Cub_ _: Works for me, lemme look up directions from Kurt's house._

Sebastian gets up to find his shoes and keys. As he's fixing his hair, he gets a text with directions and replies that he'll be there in ten minutes.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, most of the story really, has a lot of long explanations. Sorry about that, but since Sebastian has all these stupid ideas about who Kurt is, I take great pleasure in proving that he's wrong. My husband tells me the song thing is annoying, but that's just a glee thing right? D=

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian follows Dave into his room, he tries very hard not to glance at the closet. _How does he stay in this room? How does he not freak out every time he looks for a pair of pants or something? I don't think I could open the door on the place I tried to kill myself without throwing up. Hell, I still might if he opens it._

Trying to shake off the guilt and anxiousness, Sebastian sits in the chair by the window, Dave sitting on the bed. "Could your room be anymore 'boy next door'?" Sebastian chuckles, looking around.

"Shut up Seb, at least I don't have to have posters of girls up in here anymore. That shit was just uncomfortable."

"Okay, but seriously with the airplanes? Are you 12? How long has this been your room?" Sebastian keeps glancing up at the plastic planes, half expecting them to fall on his head.

"Ugh, I made them with my dad when I was a kid. Drop it, Seb. This has been my room my whole life. Why else would three walls be baby fucking blue?"

"Aww, this was your nursery? Where did the crib go? Do you still use the baby blankets?"

"Well damn, look at the time. You should get back to staring at Fancy's walls, since you're just so busy."

"Okay, okay, I'll stop. Seriously though, it's kind of awesome that you've lived in once place forever. We moved every two or three years, sometimes less. Is there a growth chart on a doorway?" Sebastian can't help but smirk.

"Again, shut up Seb... and yes, there is, and no, you can't see it. I was a freakishly early bloomer. Early pubes and everything." Dave looks like he'd rather talk about anything else in the world, so Sebastian looks around the room for a new topic.

"Why the ever loving fuck do you have a wedding cake topper on your bookshelf?"

Dave pales a little, "Let's go back to talking about early puberty."

Intrigued, Sebastian walks over to it and picks it up, "Okay, so what's the story, why do you have it and why are you glaring at me for touching it?"

Dave scoffs, "I'm not 'glaring at you for touching it', it's just not something I want to talk about and I kinda forgot it was there. Now I can't decide if I should throw it away or give it back. But yea, definitely don't put it back... now that I know it's there I kind of want to take it outside and smash it." He looks genuinely upset, so Sebastian moves back to the chair, still holding it, and asks,

"Seriously, what's the story?"

Dave sighs, "Okay, so you know that I did some fucked up things to Fancy and he transferred to Dalton right?"

"That's about all I've heard about it, but yes." Honestly, Sebastian thinks Kurt is quite the drama queen. He's heard from Blaine about kids being slushied and tossed into dumpsters, sometimes threatened or pushed around a little, it sounded like scare tactics and intimidation. _Can't believe the little princess put his family through the financial strain and drama to transfer. Then he came back just a few months later. What was the freaking point?_

Dave shifts uncomfortably, "Well, one of the things I did was take that wedding topper from him."

"Seriously? That's what you're so upset over? It was a year ago man. So you stole a cake decoration, I'm sure the dollar store has lots more of them." Sebastian shrugs it off and goes to toss the topper to Dave. He's unprepared for the growl Dave let's out and the glare he gets for his off-hand comment.

"Yeah well, considering I'd threatened to kill him the day before, I doubt he was that worried about the fucking cake."

Sebastian just stares at Dave for a solid 45 seconds, letting that sink in, then he weakly manages, "You what?"

Sighing, the anger running out of him, Dave rubs a hand through his hair and says, "Look, that was the end of the story. This all started because I liked him, okay? Which you already knew. I'd see him strutting around in his tight-ass pants or his fuck-me boots, or for fuck's sake, a corset-"

"Yeah, even I've heard about the corset, seems to be a favorite."

Dave continues like he hasn't heard Seb's comment, "-and all I'd want to do is push him against the nearest wall and... but I couldn't. I was terrified of the idea of it, pissed off that I was thinking it, and always so fucking worried that I wouldn't be able to control myself. So I started pushing him around a bit more. I couldn't slushy him or throw him in a dumpster... As fucked up as everything I did was, I couldn't bring myself to actually ruin his clothes. So if we slushied the gleeks, I'd pick someone else, let Azimio or someone take care of Hummel."

Sebastian considers commenting that even Kurt would probably rather ruin an expensive sweater than be threatened, but he just sits quietly and let's Dave finish. He needs to hear this and it sounds like Dave needs to say it.

"It got to where I was pushing him so hard he'd slam into the lockers. I'm sure he had bruises, but in my fucked up mind they were like angry hickeys or something, some mark that I'd made on him, that made him mine." Dave looks more disgusted by that statement than Sebastian is, which is impressive. _At least he hears himself and knows how fucked up that is._ "He would fall down in the floor and I'd just walk away like I wasn't dying to touch him. Like I didn't want to kick my own ass for hurting him."

Dave gulps and says, "Then one day, I'm walking down the hall, and he's got his phone out, and he's got this smile on his face... and I just knew. I knew he'd finally found a boyfriend or someone that could actually like him back. I smacked the phone out of his hand and pushed him again. It wasn't that different than how it usually went. I walked away, went to the locker room to gather my shit for practice. But for some reason, that day, he followed me. Ran into the room, yelling at me. He started ranting, telling me how I wasn't his type, total bullshit, I later found out. He has a major thing for jocks. But at the time it was like he was punching me in the stomach. He was just going on and on, pulling out that bitchy attitude that made me want to..." He stops himself and coughs before continuing, "So... I did."

Sebastian blinks for a second, "You did what?"

"I uh... I kissed him. He refers to it as kiss-rape, and sadly he's used to it now. He has no idea how hot he is. He brings out the tiny sliver of homo in the straightest of dudes." Dave shakes his head, "Anyway, I kissed him, and I went back to kiss him again and he pushed me away. That's when I noticed his face... he looked so fucking scared, man. I got angry, punched the lockers, ran away. Didn't stop running until I got to my car. It wasn't until I got home that I realized the reason he looked so scared was because he was afraid I wouldn't stop. He was freaked out and worried that I would..."

"He thought you would rape him..." Sebastian barely manages to whisper it.

"I think so, yeah. But I swear man, as soon as he pushed me away, I ran. I wouldn't have done that. Ever. Not even at my worst, did I think it for a second. That night, I realized that the boy I'd been terrorizing all year now knew my worst secret. Knew I was a hypocrite. When I got to school the next day, I expected to be jumped in the parking lot. I mean, Kurt got so much shit, and everyone had known he was gay since we first learned the word. 'oh, gay means boys that like boys, like Hummel'. But me? God, I was the furthest thing from the stereotype. They'd tear me apart. Well, we all know how that went when it did go down. Anyway, no one knew. I waited all day for the stares, the comments, they never came."

He tightens his jaw a little, "Then, I'm going to last period, taking the outside staircase, and there he is. Walking with some preppy, over-gelled pretty boy. I'm trying to keep my cool, not make a scene, and they start talking to me about it. Right there on the stairs! Surrounded by students... Bland wouldn't shut up, yammering on and on like a social worker or something, and I snapped, pushed him against the wall. Kurt pulled me off him, pushed me away. Started getting bitchy again. I couldn't take it, I ran. I didn't want to hear what they were saying, didn't want others to hear it. So I just left them there."

Sebastian is just sitting there, staring at Dave in shock. _Kurt did what? He started pushing around the bully who had assaulted him? Yelling at him?_ _ **What?**_ _Is he_ _ **crazy**_ _?_

Dave snorts, "I know, I can tell what your thinking. But that's just the way Kurt is. He doesn't back down. I can't tell you how many times he cut me down to size over the years, never caring that I could take him apart if I wanted. So after that, I figured, well shit, he told Mousse, what's to stop him telling everyone? So I threatened him. I got up in his face in the hallway, told him if he told anyone, I'd kill him. I said it as harshly as I could, I needed him to believe it. I figured it was the only way to stop him. Of course, I didn't mean it. I couldn't have killed him. Obviously, I'd have killed myself first."

Sebastian doesn't appreciate the joke. He knows what it is. He's heard similar jokes from kids who had death touch their lives at young ages. Cancer kids, kids that had lost parents, or siblings. Sometimes grandparents were enough if they were super close. It can warp you a little, change your sense of humor. He's heard Kurt make jokes that most would cringe from. _This must be how Kurt and Dave handled their friendship after the bullying. With this fucked up sense of humor they share._

"The day after I threatened him he was in the hallway, talking to Hudson. I knew he'd had a crush on him the year before, so I got jealous. I walked up to him, scared him, took the cake topper. Obviously I kept it, although I'd forgotten about it. I don't even know how you saw it, it was tucked between books..." Dave glares at Sebastian like this is all somehow his fault.

"Shortly after that his dad found out what was going on, and everything blew up. He switched schools. I missed him more than I thought I would. I used to think if he'd leave, I could move on. Instead I found myself staring at other guys, comparing parts of them to Kurt, which was my downfall actually. Tana caught me checking out Evans' ass. Apparently staring at Kurt was normal, everyone stared at Kurt, the shit he wore, you don't even know. He's so much more tame now."

Sebastian snorts, "If this is tame I can only imagine the shit he was wearing before."

Dave smiles a little, "No, you really can't. Trust me. So when Tana found out, she blackmailed me into being her beard. She wanted to be prom queen. I managed to convince Fancy to come back. Told him I'd protect him, walk him to class. I'd pretend to be Santana's good little boyfriend, who does whatever she wants, to get him back at McKinley. They needed him for nationals or something. So yeah, he came back, I apologized, we moved on. I kept that damned thing at first because it was the only thing of his that I had... then I kept it because I needed a reminder to never be that again. Now it's just a hunk of glass that I really want out of my fucking room..."

Sebastian looks down at it for a second before getting up and turning to the window beside him. He pulls up the blinds and opens the window, leaning out he throws the topper as hard as he can, as far as he can. They hear it smash on the road in front of Dave's house. When he turns back around, Dave looks only mildly concerned that he now has smashed bits of glass or porcelain or whatever it was, outside his house. He also looks relieved. _Meh, he'll get over it. It's supposed to rain tonight anyway, so it should get washed out into the gutter._

After sitting in the chair, Sebastian really speaks for the first time since this conversation started. Dave looks worried about what he's going to say after all the confessions he'd just made. "Okay. So I have a question about all this that's actually been bugging me for awhile."

Dave just blinks at him, waiting.

"You were so into Kurt that you made his life hell, terrorized him, then almost outed yourself. Blaine was so into him that he switched schools. He went from being a rock star at Dalton to being Gay #2 at McKinley. Noah Puckerman, and you know way more about his reputation than I do, follows Kurt around like a lost puppy. I mean, he all but fucks him on his father's couch, right in front of Burt. Who is decidedly unhappy about such events, by the way. My question is this: why the fuck is everyone **so** into him? He's just a guy. There's nothing really hot about him. I mean sure, his ass is alright, but so what? He's got the girliest face I've ever seen on someone without tits and for fuck's sake, he's just **such** a **bitch**. What's the draw?"

Dave just sits in shocked silence for about 30 seconds. Eventually he says, "You are fucking kidding me, right? You live in his **room**. You've seen him. You've seen the shit he wears and the way he acts. How can you not think he's **hot as fuck**?"

Sebastian shrugs, "I just don't get it. He's such a prude. The only times he makes any reference to actual sex of any kind is if no one is in the room. I heard him say blowjob the other day and almost died of shock. Seriously, how can a teenage boy not have a libido at all? I mean, when I first met him and Blaine, I could tell they were virgins. They'd already been dating for like a year, what the hell was he waiting on?"

Dave bursts out laughing. When he's finally controlled himself he says, "Oh my God. You're dead fucking serious aren't you?" Shaking his head, he gets up and gets something out of his desk drawer and sits on the edge of the bed closest to Sebastian. "You are totally talking out of your ass right now. You don't even know. See, Kurt thinks he's this total prudish romantic. He thinks that he's not sexual at all. He told me once that he referred to himself as having 'the sex appeal of a baby penguin'." Sebastian laughs at that, totally agreeing with him on that front. _Sure, he's pretty. And his ass is better than I'll ever admit out loud, but seriously, he just can't do the sexy thing at all._

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up while you can, dude. When he tries to be intentionally sexy, I'll grant you, it's hard not to laugh. Well, used to be, I haven't really spent a lot of time with him face to face since him and Blaine really started going at it. Which, by the way, was mostly Blaine's fault. They didn't get down before they met you because Kurt has some Mommy issues that I'm not getting into with you. He can't watch porn because he can't get over the fact that those guys have mothers who would be horrified, which makes him think of his own mom, and can she see what he's watching right now? And yeah, that's a bit of a turn off." He debates continuing but eventually says,

"He apparently talked to Blaine about that before they started dating and it left Blaine thinking that Kurt thought sex was gross or something. All he meant when he talked about it was that he didn't want to talk to Blaine, a boy he liked, that didn't like him back, about sex. He wanted his first time to be a learning experience, he wanted to learn it all first hand, and for it to be romantic. He really only had basic knowledge of what sex was before just biting the bullet and doing it. And all of that made Blaine back off from the topic. They didn't talk about it, didn't do anything together, until eventually Kurt, thinking Blaine still didn't find him sexy, asked him about it. Blaine was the one that said they should take it slow. He scheduled their make out sessions, for fuck's sake. Looking back now, I have to wonder if they both just knew they didn't feel that way about each other and were afraid of taking that step. Then they met you, and you can probably guess the way that went down."

Sebastian was still processing all this, trying to fit the knowledge that it was Blaine that threw up roadblocks, not Kurt, when Dave says, "Okay, so I'm going to show you two videos that I took with my old camera phone back in the day. Kurt can never know these videos exist. He'd kill me. Especially for the Cheerios one. He still gets shit for that uniform."

Sebastian looks reluctantly interested, "I've actually heard about the uniform. Apparently, Puck offered to de-virginize him after some dance routine. Is this the one?"

Dave looks unsurprised by Puck's shamelessness. "Yeah, that's the one."

Dave leans back on his hands, watching Sebastian watch the small, slightly blurry video that is zoomed in as much as possible on Kurt as he struts through a gym with a bunch of cheerleaders singing Madonna. Dave has to contain a snort of laughter at Seb's face when it gets to the part where Kurt suddenly drops down and his pants tighten over his ass as he grunts.

Sebastian watches, slightly amazed, as Kurt swings his hips and keeps bending over in that tight-ass uniform, ending the number in this cocky little stance with his hips pushed forward and using his full-on bitchface. When the video ends, Sebastian clears his throat and hands the phone back to Dave, "Okay, I think you've made your point."

"Oh, no. Not yet. See, that was sophomore year. Way before Blaine. That was actually right after I realized I liked him. It was completely unintentional. He still doesn't believe he was even hot back then. He thinks the reason Puck was so willing to fuck him was all the uniform, that he didn't care what was in it, just that it was a Cheerio." At Sebastian's raised eyebrow Dave says, "I know, I said he was hot, not smart. Anyway, this was right after he came back from gay hogwarts, like, the **day** he came back. They were doing Lady Gaga again, and they all printed out these shirts. They were supposed to say what each one of them found different about themselves but that they had come to accept. I was watching with Santana because we were 'dating' and I was supposed to walk Fancy to his car after school. He was actually trying to be sexy, if weird, in this."

Having seen some Lady Gaga videos, he's familiar with the concept, so Sebastian just nods and takes the phone back, kind of dreading what he's about to see. He knows he's in trouble from the second Kurt shows up with just-fucked hair and puts his arms up, giving something in front of him this sexy, blank stare. Sebastian watches with a carefully blank face as Kurt poses, runway walks, and does the stepping move from Grease. When he strips off the jacket Sebastian tries very hard not to swallow his tongue. He can now see the tight white shirt clearly, already having read the message, 'Likes Boys', he's more focused on the way the thin material clings to him, "Where the fuck did those arms come from?"

It's only after Dave snorts that he realizes he said that out loud. Damn. He does the Grease step again, then starts shaking his hips and for fuck's sake, starts running his hand down to his crotch, only to divert and reach behind himself and then starts swinging his hips again. Seb's all but holding his breath by the time the video ends. He passes the phone back to Dave, saying,

"You're an asshole. How am I supposed to look him in the face now? That gay, gay face."

Dave laughs and tosses the phone on his nightstand, leaning back. "Sounds like your problem, not mine. Besides, it won't matter. You're probably in the zone by now."

"The zone?" At Sebastian's confusion, Dave explains,

"See, Fancy spent most of his time crushing on straight guys until sophomore year, when he met the Great White Gay that is Bland. He did some things, especially with Finn, that turned people against him. He would flirt shamelessly with Finn, he didn't even care if they were in the hallway or whatever. He went a little nuts with it, and because of that, Finn got really weird about him hanging out, or really even being around, straight guys. Which in this town, was just guys.

"So Kurt trained himself to friend-zone straight boys. When he met Evans- Sam by the way, Kurt thought he was gay, so he asked Sam to sing with him and started flirting with him, a little, it wasn't even overt apparently, and Finn flipped his shit. He told Sam not to sing with him, that he'd get all kinds of shit for it or whatever. Sam didn't seem to care and wasn't going to back out, so Finn went to Kurt and started guilt tripping him, telling him how if he didn't drop out of it, that Sam would quit glee and it would be all Kurt's fault, how selfish Kurt was being, etc. So Kurt caved and backed off. He shut down all feelings he had for Sam and refused to think of him as anything other than, **friend**."

Sebastian is confused, "Uh, I live with them now, they're much closer than I am with any of my friends. I don't make a habit of slapping my friends' asses and cuddling with them during movies. Especially straight friends."

"Well, that's the thing. He's not straight. Apparently, Sam is bi." Seeing the look in Seb's eye at this news, Dave scowls, "Don't even go there dude, not only do you have to live with him, he's not even out. You can't tell anyone I told you or let on that you know. Forget I said anything after this conversation okay?"

"Fine, fine. So what happened?"

"Well, a few months after the duet thing went down, they had a party and Sam got really drunk, he was dating Tana, but she doing body shots with Britt, so he stumbled up to Kurt and **he** kiss-raped him."

"I've actually heard about that, sort of." Sebastian admits, still confused.

"Well, the next day Kurt calls him up and asks him what the fuck that was about, and Sam admits that he's liked Kurt since he joined glee club, he's just not out. And Kurt told him that he'd spent too long thinking of him as a friend and that he didn't think about him like that anymore. That, and he was still wrapped up in Blaine."

Seb smirks, "Okay, but that's just one guy, how is that a pattern?"

"It wasn't just him. Puck has been trying to tap his ass for years. At first, Kurt said he wouldn't give up his virginity for a quick fuck. Then by the time he broke up with Blaine, he said they were too close and it would ruin the friendship. So **bam**! Friend-zone strikes again. Then there's me, when I told him I liked him on Valentine's Day, he told me he didn't think of me that way. At the time, I thought he wasn't into me because of all the shit he said about me not being his type, but yeah, no. He told me about two months ago that it wasn't that he didn't find me attractive, he just saw me as a friend." Dave rolls his eyes then says,

"He put Sam in the 'No' box because he was "straight". Puck got put in because Kurt won't fuck a friend, and Puck doesn't do relationships. I got da' box for being such an asshole for so long. Which if I'd known he could have been interested, I'd have fucking carried him from class to class, and beat the shit out of anyone that looked at us funny but, hindsight right? There was also a guy at Dalton that he thought was straight... so yeah. You're probably already fucked. I can think of at least three reasons he'd friend-zone you. Hell, the only one to make it out was Blaine and that's because it was his zone, not Kurt's."

Sebastian finally speaks up, "You know that long ass rant was pointless, right? I don't give a shit what Lady Face thinks of me, it's not like I want to fuck him anyway. As he pointed out, you can find someone hot and not want to fuck them."

Dave just smirks, "Sure, I can. Kurt can. You can't."

Secretly, Sebastian thinks he probably has a point, but all he says is, "Shut up, asshole. Thought we were going to watch a movie?"

* * *

When Sebastian gets back to the Hudmel house, he just sits outside in his car for a few minutes, thinking of everything that's been going on. _Okay, I really need to remind myself of the facts. Kurt Hummel has a_ _very,_ _ **very**_ _gay face. Apparently his classmates could tell he was gay before they even knew what gay was. That type of stereotype reinforcement pisses me off to no end. He flounces around singing show tunes, freaking out about hair products and moisturizing. He wears girl clothes, and apparently used to wear even_ _ **worse**_ _stuff. He was a cheerleader. He's a countertenor, which, while that makes for an awesome singing voice, is not something that butches him up by any means._

_And okay, so he can be hot. I'd have to be stupid to not find him attractive, but there's a difference between finding someone hot and actually considering them as someone to sleep with, or God forbid, date. I could never be with someone who tries so hard to be a girl._ Scoffing angrily at his thoughts, _Why am I even thinking about him romantically?_ , Sebastian finally climbs out and heads inside. As he's stomping up the stairs and coming down the hall to their room, he hears the beginning strains of Christina Aguilera's 'Ain't No Other Man' and he stops himself. _You have_ _ **got**_ _to be kidding me._

Walking up to the door, Sebastian stops to bang his head on it once before opening it. It's worse than he thought. Not only is Hummel dancing around in nothing but Noah Puckerman's old McKinley shirt, Puck himself is sitting on the bed holding a guitar, playing and singing along. Sebastian gets an idea and barely manages to pull it off in time before they get through the long _Heeeeeeeey-_

( _Kurt_ **Puck** _**Both**_ )

**Just do your thang honey!**

_I could feel it from the start,_  
Couldn't stand to be apart.  
Something bout you caught my eye,  
Something moved me deep inside!  
Don't know what you did boy but you had it 

_and I've been hooked ever since._  
I told my mother, my brother, my sister and my friends  
I told the others, my lovers, both past and present tense.  
That every time I see you everything starts making sense.

**Just do your thang honey!**

__**Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do** __**  
** **(what you do).** __**  
** _You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon._ __**  
** **You got soul, you got class.** __**  
** _You got style with your bad ass -_ __**oh yeah!  
** **Ain't no other man its true -** _all right -_ _**  
** _ __**Ain't no other man but you.**

**Never thought I'd be all right.** _No, no, no!_ **  
Till you came and changed my life.** _Yeah, yeah, yeah!_ ****  
What was cloudy now is clear! Yeah, yeah!  
You're the light that I needed.  
You got what I want boy, and I want it!  
So keep on givin' it up!

_So tell your mother, your brother, your sister, and your friends._  
Every other, your lovers, better not be present tense.  
Cause I want everyone to know that you are mine and no one else's!

_Oooooooo, oh!_

__**Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do** __**  
** **(what you do).** __**  
** _You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon._ __**  
** **You got soul, you got class.** __**  
** _You got style with your bad ass_ __**  
** **Ain't no other man its true** _**  
** _ __**Ain't no other man but you.**

**Break it down now!**

_Ain't no other, ain't, ain't no other!_ **(other)** __  
Ain't no other, ain't, ain't no other LOVER!  
Ain't no other, I, I, I need no other!  
 **Ain't no other man but you!**

_** Ohhhh! ** _

**You are there when I'm a mess**  
Talk me down from every ledge  
Give me strength, boy you're the best  
 _You're the only one who's ever passed every test_

_**Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do**_  
 _You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon._  
 **You got soul, you got class.**  
 _You got style with your bad ass -_ **oh yeah!**  
 _ **Ain't no other man it's true**_  
 __ **Ain't no other man but you.**

_And now I'm tellin' you, so ain't no other man but you._

_**Ain't no other man, can stand up next to you  
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do**_  
 **(what you do).**  
 _You're the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon._  
 **You got soul, you got class.**  
 _You got style your bad ass –_ **don't you know?**  
 **Ain't no other man it's true -** _oooooh -_  
 __ **Ain't no other man but you.**

Sebastian has just hidden his phone behind him when Kurt and Puck turn to the doorway. He slips it into his back pocket and crosses his arms over his chest, leaning on the doorjamb, waiting on someone to say something with a nasty smirk in place. Kurt laughs nervously and goes into his closet to find pants, having changed out of the ones he worked in, after his shower. Puck flushes a little but shrugs, trying to act like they weren't just caught singing Christina fucking Aguilera. He's going to kill Kurt for his.

Sebastian doesn't say a word, just walks in and grabs his laptop and goes back downstairs. It's almost dinner time and he needs to email his dad. While he's checking his facebook at the kitchen table, three of four teenage boys come thundering down the stairs and collapse in the living room. Puck is missing, probably showering to avoid drama later. They start trying to pull Sebastian into the conversation but frankly, he wants nothing to do with them at this moment. He's so tired and emotionally drained after this weekend that he just wants to eat and go to bed. Tomorrow he'd be back on his way to Dalton and he'd be able to forget about all the bullshit that is living with Kurt Hummel.

Finally deciding he'd rather cook than clean, he moves his laptop away from the table and goes into the kitchen, poking around to see what they have. Luckily Kurt and Carole seem to be diverse chefs, because he finds everything he needs. Resigned, he sighs and starts slicing onions.

* * *

 

Half an hour later he's pulling out the oversized coffee cups filled with soup from the oven. He'd looked for enough oven safe bowls, but honestly their coffee cups were big enough and he fit the bread in them fine. He's setting the cups on the table when Carole comes in from work. When she steps over to him she smiles widely, "Oh wow, Seb, honey, thanks for making dinner! I didn't know you could cook!"

Sebastian shrugs and says, "It's just French onion soup, I also made salad but I'm not sure if anyone will eat any of this, I probably should have asked first."

"No, no! You're fine! They complain about healthy food but really, they'll eat anything. And I know Kurt loves French onion soup." Carole smiles at him like this is the best news she's ever shared. Sebastian kind of wants to just go straight to bed, not even hungry anymore. Before he can think up something to say that wouldn't accompany a sneer she turns and yells, "Okay guys, dinner's ready! And no complaints or everyone will eat Hot Pockets for a week!"

The guys, plus the previously missing Puck, had been so wrapped up in their game or movie or whatever that they hadn't even noticed he'd gotten off the computer. They slowly trickled over to the table. Most of them looked confused but Kurt had a wide smile that he tried to aim at Sebastian. Instead of acknowledging it, Sebastian turned to help Carole in the kitchen.

_Is it morning yet? Get me out of here._


	7. Chapter 7

[Kurt]

For the first time in a long time, Kurt is actually woken up by an alarm. Noah barely grunts and turns over. He'd set it last night, even though asking Sebastian what time he needed to be up had gotten him snapped at, for some reason. But whatever, he'd slept through the night! Blaine was his friend again! Noah was back in his house! High school was almost over! His job interview was today! He'd get to see David! So what if Sebastian Smythe was a jerk, isn't that the status quo?

He'd actually thought that they'd been getting along lately, but last night he'd refused to even glance in Kurt's direction and seemed annoyed by Kurt's persistent existence. It probably didn't help that he'd gone last in the shower and had only had lukewarm water.

Kurt gets up and walks over to Sebastian's bed, tapping him lightly on the shoulder when he makes no move to get up. "Sebastian. Sebastian! **Sebastian!** "

" **What?!** "

Kurt jumps back a little, then says, "It's 5:30, the alarm went off. If you're going to make it to school on time, you need to wake up."

Sebastian glares at him and Kurt backs away a little, then he huffs and just turns away from him. _If he wants to be an asshole for no reason, let him. Who even gives a damn?_

Kurt grabs his outfit for the day and retreats into the bathroom to wash his face, brush his teeth, and change his clothes. It's as he's putting the finishing touches on his outfit that he notices that something is off with the hanging shelf in the shower. He walks closer and gasps when he sees the problem. Grabbing the bottle, he runs back out into his room. Sebastian has actually managed to get himself up, get dressed in a fresh Dalton uniform, and is working on his hair standing near the vanity. Him being almost ready to leave doesn't help with Kurt wanting to strangle him.

" **You**! You took the last shower last night, right?!"

"God don't remind me. It was freezing by the end so I'm definitely not going last again."

Biting his tongue, Kurt forces out, "Did. You. Use. My. Shower. Gel?!"

By this point, Noah is sitting up in bed, blinking blearily and he can hear movement from Finn and Sam's room. Sebastian just glances at the bottle in Kurt's hand and shrugs. "Yeah, I forgot to grab mine and they use Axe. If I wanted to smell like a stripper, I'd find a pole to dance on."

Kurt can feel the blood drain from his face as he sees Sam, out of the corner of his eye, freeze on just the other side of the bathroom door. Knowing that Sebastian probably doesn't know what he's just said, he quickly recovers and charges forward, getting into Sebastian's face.

"That's not funny asshole, and you left the lid off the bottle! You knocked it over and it spent all night going down the drain! This shit costs like $40!" By this point, Kurt is so mad that he's barely keeping his voice below a decibel that would crack glass.

Sebastian sneers, "Jesus fuck, you're such a priss, Hummel. Who cares? Buy another bottle."

"Buy anoth- **are you fucking kidding me?!** Why should I spend $40 just because you're an asshole?! **You** buy another bottle!" Kurt can see that Noah has woken up and is glaring at them, but is leaving it to Kurt to handle. He can also see Sam has been joined by Finn, both watching warily.

Sebastian snaps, "Fine! You know what, here." He walks around Kurt and grabs his wallet out of his gym bag, already packed for the trip back to school. He gets out a $100 bill and throws it in Kurt's face, then stepping up close to him saying, "Here Gay Face, now you can buy yourself a new bottle of fucking shower gel. There should even be enough left over for you to pick up some Midol for your cramps and a frilly pink tutu. It'd be better than the shit you usually wear."

Before Kurt can say or do anything, Noah is up and standing toe to toe with Sebastian. Kurt can also see that Finn is being restrained by Sam in the bathroom, Sam hissing in his ear, probably telling Finn to calm down. Noah gets right up in Sebastian's face saying, "It's time to go, asshat. Run back to that school while you can still fucking walk. You've got about 30 seconds to be in your car before I break your fucking kneecaps."

Sebastian pales at the dead seriousness on Noah's face and turns around, grabbing his bag and keys and walking quickly from the room. A few seconds later they hear the front door slam. Sam finally lets Finn go, who rushes up to Kurt and asks if he's okay. Sam goes to the window to make sure Sebastian left.

Noah walks up to Kurt and touches his arm, "Are you okay, Princess?"

Kurt flinches at the nickname and says lowly, "Please, don't call me that right now."

Before Finn can punch Noah, which it looks like will be any second, Noah reaches out and grabs Kurt in a tight hug. "No. That douche isn't changing a damn thing about you or the way we treat you. Nothing he says matters. None of that shit was true. He fucked up. He broke the rules, and he should know better. New guy or not, we told him. If he was going to use your shit he should have at least taken care of it. This whole thing is on him, babe. You did nothing wrong."

Kurt grabs Noah's back, a small sob escaping the tight hold he'd held on it. At the tiny sound, he's suddenly surrounded. Finn glomps onto him immediately from behind him, having been standing so close, and he's shortly followed by Sam who squeezes under Finn's much larger arms to hold him from the side.

After only a few minutes, Kurt calms down, realizing that having the support of these guys, one of which had once said something not so different, meant way more than anything Sebastian could say or do to him. When he straightens up as much as he can, they all take a step back to give him room to breathe. Noah reaches over and wipes the few tears that escaped from his face, kissing him on the cheek and saying, "Okay, after that rude awakening, I really have to piss."

When the door shuts, Kurt shakes his head and a small laugh bubbles out. Finn steps up beside him and gives him a quick side hug and says, "I'm going to go get some cereal. Are you okay now?"

Kurt smiles and replies, "Yeah, I'm fine Finn. Thank you for trying to help."

After he walks out, Kurt finally turns to the last man standing. "I'm so sorry Sam. I'm pretty sure he didn't know what he was saying when he said it. Even if he did, fuck him."

Sam actually laughs at this, giving Kurt a sheepish smile, "Yeah, fuck him. It's okay, I've heard it before from people who did know. If I can forgive Blaine, I can forgive him some day too. Ya know, if he ever actually pulls his head out of his ass. I'm honestly way more pissed off about what he said to you. I just didn't want Finn to get in trouble with Burt and I knew you and Puck could handle it. Although he rendered you kinda moot."

Kurt wipes one last tear away and laughs, "Yeah well, every now and then it's nice to be protected. Not that I needed it of course."

"Of course!" Sam smiles and tugs Kurt in for a long lasting, tight hug, burying his face in Kurt's neck. Naturally, that's when Noah comes back out of the bathroom, clearly having taken the time to brush his teeth and get ready for school.

"Hey! Hands off! Stop using sympathy to try and steal my princess!" Noah glares at Sam as he walks over to the dresser that he keeps a few sets of clothes in. He puts on a pair of jeans but he's obviously a couple shirts short. "Dammit babe, did you have to steal so many? I didn't have that many here. Hey, Stephen Tyler, get your hands off my man and go get me a shirt to borrow."

Laughing at Puck's glare, Sam pats Kurt on the ass before releasing him. Then he winks at a shirtless Puck and walks back into the bathroom, finally getting to finish what he went in there for a good 15 minutes ago.

Puck starts muttering to himself and grabs his hair wax, moving to the vanity to fix his mohawk, using very little because he knows Kurt likes it better natural. Kurt smiles to himself and looks around the room. He notices that Sebastian didn't make the bed before he left, so he sighs and goes about doing it himself. _I don't want to look at it all week and remember this moment._

When he leans back up, he feels Noah's chest press against him, and soon he's wrapped in his arms with Noah pushing his forehead down on Kurt's shoulder. "Don't listen to him, Princess. You're perfect just the way you are. Tutus and all."

Kurt finally let's himself relax completely. He should have known Noah would notice the tenseness, even if Finn and Sam hadn't. "How do you always know when I'm still on edge, even if no one else can see it?"

"Easy, your ass is clenched tighter than usual."

The deadpan statement manages to shock a loud laugh out of Kurt. Smacking Noah on the arm, he finally steps away from him, bending down to grab the slightly crumpled $100 bill.

"So what are you going to do with that? Give it back? I have a location suggestion on where we put it." Noah still seems mad enough to hit something, so Kurt wisely doesn't indulge in agreeing with him. Noah goes back to getting ready, putting on the shirt that Sam tosses at him through the bathroom door.

"Oh no, I'll be buying new shower gel with it. Along with some... other things. Just trust me on this. He's going to regret giving me quite this much. In fact, I'll even chip in some of my own money. New York be damned, this is worth it." Smirking in a way that gives Noah chills, Kurt gathers up his school bag and grabs Noah's hand, leading him downstairs, "Okay, let's go swear Finn and Sam to silence. If this gets back to dad he won't let Sebastian back in the house, and then how would I get revenge?"

"Oh God, if I didn't hate that bastard with a fiery passion right now, I'd actually feel sorry for him." Noah shakes his head. Sebastian really doesn't know who he's fucking with.

* * *

 

By the time they pull up to the school, the boys have mostly forgotten about that morning's drama. Thankfully they had plenty of time to eat and then go out for coffee, so even the slight redness is gone from Kurt's eyes by the time they are supposed to meet up. He's standing beside the Navigator waiting for Dave to pull up when Blaine walks over.

"Hey! Why the protection brigade? Surely Karofsky won't need this much help this early?" Blaine looks around at the three boys that haven't moved farther than ten feet away from Kurt since they got out of the car. Kurt sighs,

"Guys, it's okay. I'll be fine. The big bad Warbler can't get me here. You can go."

Finn inches closer and says, "Are you sure, bro? I can hang out just in case. Something might happen with Karofsky, too." Sam also looks reluctant to go.

"We'll be fine. I'm assuming Noah couldn't be wedged away with a crowbar, and I've got Blaine, and David can take care of himself. Shoo!" Nodding, they finally go to step away, Finn slapping him lightly on the back and Sam squeezing his hand briefly before taking off. As they leave, Noah moves in closer and throws an arm around his shoulder, pulling Kurt a little closer.

"So, now that you guys are talking, PDA is okay right?"

Kurt sighs, "Noah, you're going to give people the wrong impression. About both of us."

Noah scoffs loudly, "Who gives a shit what they think? I'm losing you in a few short weeks, you don't plan to date anyone else between now and New York, so fuck it. I don't care what any of these losers say."

Blaine smiles, "Well put! And honestly, I think it's cute that you guys are so close. It was a little worrying when we were dating, but now I just find you guys adorable!"

Noah glares and mumbles, "Stupid hobbit. 'M not adorable. I'm a badass."

Kurt just smiles and smacks Noah on the arm. He's just about to pull out his phone and text David to find out where he is when he sees his truck turn into the lot. Pulling into the space beside the Nav, David steps out and notices that Noah looks tense and Blaine looks ready to defend. Defend who isn't clear. Kurt just ignores them and steps out from under Noah's arm to walk up to David, and pull him down for a quick hug.

As he's backing away Kurt whispers, "Don't worry, we've got your back." He smiles at David and then turns back to Noah and Blaine. "Okay, so we need to hit the office first, then probably the teachers' lounge so I can look for Coach Sue and warn my teachers that I won't be in class today."

Noah steps back up to Kurt and puts his arm back around his shoulder, leading him inside the school. David glances at Blaine, who shrugs, and then they follow. If everyone in eyesight is staring at them, a few with hostile glares, they seem not to notice.

* * *

 

Kurt sits in the library at school and tries to prepare himself mentally. Lunch starts in five minutes. It's been a long day already, and they're only half way through it. This morning Noah and Blaine had walked them around until Kurt managed to get notes from Coach Sue and track down all of his teachers. Then they'd walked Kurt and David to his pre-cal class. _Who knew David was that good at math?_

Kurt had just sat in the back re-reading 'Sense and Sensibility'. He really needed to be reminded that there was romance in the world and that sometimes, the good guys won. He'd told Blaine and David about what Sebastian had said and done that morning, and while Blaine looked like he was ready to drive to Westerville to take Sebastian apart, David had looked shocked for a few seconds before shaking his head sadly and saying, "Make sure you kick him in the balls before you let him apologize, Fancy."

Kurt was so surprised by David's comment that he said, "What makes you think he'll apologize? Or that I'd listen if he did?"

Which only got him a smirk and a "Because I know you both. He won't be able to stomach the guilt and you could never hold a grudge the way you're supposed to."

Kurt realizes that he's spending yet more time thinking about Sebastian 'Douchebag' Smythe, and forcibly gets up and makes sure everything is packed up before the bell rings. Between first and second period, it had been Finn and Mike who'd walked them to the library, showing up about two minutes before class ended.

They wait near the door. Less than a minute before the bell Noah, Sam, and Artie all walk or roll in to get them. As they go down the hall, Kurt notices the looks a bit more than he did this morning, but to be fair, it might not even be David they're staring at.

This morning, Noah had walked through the school with his arm on Kurt's shoulder. Now it's around his waist. Kurt flushes a little, but doesn't stop the possessive hold. He just pretends not to notice anything is different. They walk in and after getting their food, sit at the glee table. Kurt goes to sit next to David but Noah beats him to it. Before he can tell him to move over, Noah reaches out and grabs Kurt around the waist again and for the second time that week, pulls him down into his own lap.

Kurt is now roughly the shade of a tomato. He turns slightly and slaps Noah on the arm but makes no move to get up. Everyone at the table is staring at them and Kurt is kind of afraid to look at the rest of the room. When no one actually says anything about it, Kurt eventually relaxes and turns to put his feet under the table, relaxing back against Noah's shoulder and grabbing his sandwich.

Most of the gleeks knew, at least a bit, of their close friendship, even if they'd never actually witnessed it. Everyone tenses again when Blaine comes over with his tray. He sits next to David and leans around him to ask, "So, you guys do know you're in public, right? Seriously, you should see the faces of every jock not sitting at this table. It's not pretty. It's like half of them are trying to remember if or when they've ever exposed their junk to Puck and the others are just confused."

David snorts. "I swear, it's like Puck's trying to steal my spotlight." Then he says, in his best Kurt impression, "You bitch!"

Kurt busts out in giggles and slaps David while Puck just smirks, "Come on, there's enough homophobia to go around, we can share!"

Kurt gives a long-suffering sigh. "I need new friends." He pouts at the rest of the table.

Finally recovering from all of the weirdness they're seeing today, it's Santana who says, "So Hair-gel here has no problem with watching his ex-boyfriend of less than a month ago be felt up by the male Lindsay Lohan?"

Before Kurt or Noah could comment, "Actually, that'd be kind of hot. What do you say guys, need one more?" Blaine winks.

Kurt is off giggling again and can't manage to stop himself. Everyone else at the table, including Puck, looks like they're about to explode into a giant pile of 'WTF'. Blaine has loosened up a lot more than people really know since Kurt helped him remove the stick from his ass. _Whether or not I then put it back, is not their business._

His own thought makes Kurt almost fall off Noah's lap as he doubles up laughing. Blaine says, "Uh oh, I know that laugh. He's thinking dirty thoughts. Share please?"

That sobers him up enough to sit back up, calm down and say, "Oh Gaga, trust me, you don't want me saying that in front of the straight boys. Especially while they're eating. To answer your question, Santana, yes, Blaine is okay with me and Noah. We talked about it yesterday. Blaine and I are just really good friends now, neither of us regret the break up."

"Except for the sex. I'll miss the sex." Blaine says this with a dreamy far-off expression on his face.

Kurt flushes again and turns to David, "David, hun, be a dear and slap Blaine for me, I can't reach him."

David just laughs and says, "I ain't in it, Fancy." Which leads to Blaine sticking his tongue out at Kurt and hiding behind David's arm when Kurt glares at him.

Kurt sighs again, "I really need new friends."

* * *

 

After lunch they'd been walked to French class by most of the gleeks. French is a class they actually would have shared, and they sit in the back. David finishes his exam pretty quickly so he and Kurt both sit in the back of the room and read.

For the last class, they are walked back to the library, Mike and Sam making conversation with David about football. They'd have to wait in the library for the end of the day. He only needed to take three exams and the teacher for his AP English and Comp class, which he should be in now, is absent today. He'll need to come back on Friday.

Kurt is a little worried about David making a return trip. Favorite Cheerio or not, Kurt doubts he can get written notes for everyone again. He's sure his own teacher won't have a problem letting him out of his last class but getting someone to walk with them may be a problem. Deciding to talk to Noah about it later, he starts talking to David about what he plans to do next year.

He's just finished telling Kurt about him getting into OSU on a partial football scholarship when they're joined by not just Noah and Finn, but Sam and Blaine, too. He rolls his eyes. "Really? Don't you think five guards are a little excessive?"

"Depends, Princess. Who do you think is the fifth guard? You or Yogi?" Noah smirks and goes to carry Kurt's bag for him.

Kurt stands in a huff and puts it on himself, grabbing David's hand and pulling him away from the table. Without another word he stomps out of the library with David, glaring at anyone that looks at them funny. The other boys shake themselves and manage to catch up before Kurt clears the front doors, headed for the parking lot.

They can see some of the hockey team hanging out and being very unsubtle only about five spaces away from Kurt and David's trucks, but there are only four puckheads and there are six of them, so they pass without trouble. Kurt has just hugged David again and is telling him he'll figure something out for Friday, when he hears someone walk up behind him.

He turns to find Azimio glaring at Kurt. Before he can say anything, Azimio changes his glare to David, "Really, dude? You come back here after this long and you hang out with the gleeks all day? Don't say shit to me? Act like I don't even fucking exist, then you're just gonna bail?"

David shifts from foot to foot and says, "Z, you told me you never wanted to talk to me again. I'm just doing what you fucking wanted."

Azimio looks like he's getting steadily more and more pissed off. He gestures to Kurt, "Oh, so because I was pissed that all the sudden you're a homo, you run off with fairy boy here and-"

After the day Kurt's had, he can't help it, he flinches at the words. It's only a little jolt, but it's enough. Before he can react, Noah and Finn are stalking up to Azimio, Sam has put his hand on Kurt's back and Blaine has moved in front of him. None of this affects David, who yells, " **Stop!** "

Noah and Finn actually stutter to a halt and turn to face him, but he wasn't talking to them. David steps forward and gets into Azimio's face, speaking lowly, "I've always been a 'homo'. I was a homo when we were in the fifth grade and you broke your leg, when I spent all summer with you being bored because I didn't want you to be alone. I was a homo every time we shared a locker room, and guess what, asshole? You're not my type." Kurt actually smiles at this. "I've never checked you out, I've never liked you, I've never thought of you that way, because you were like a brother to me. And when I needed you most, you called me a fag and told me to leave you the fuck alone. So no. I didn't talk to you today. What the fuck did you expect?"

David is visibly shaking, "When I was laying in that hospital bed and my world was crumbling, all you did was tell me to fuck off. That 'fairy boy' has more balls than you and every other guy in this school, combined. He helped me when all he **should** have done was tell me to go to hell. He was there for me in a way **you** should have been. So if you have a problem with me being gay, or being friends with Fancy, **go fuck yourself**. I don't give a shit."

For a tense few seconds, no one moves. Eventually Azimio glares at David and then stalks off without another word. Kurt moves away from Sam and Blaine and hugs David again. "Thank you."

David hugs him back and picks him up a little, causing a shrill cry in his ear. "Don't mention it, Fancy."

* * *

 

That night, Kurt is laying in bed, thinking about the fucked up mess that was his day and missing Noah. _There's got to be a way to convince Dad to let him over even when Meerkat isn't here... It's not like he has anything to actually worry about. Besides, what does he think will happen? I told him years ago, I can't get pregnant. Jeez._

Eventually, he hears a knock on the door and sits up. When he calls out for whoever it is to come in, Sam steps inside and comes to sit next to Kurt on the edge of the bed.

"Are you okay?"

Kurt smiles at him, "Yeah, I'm fine, Sam. It's just been a very long day. Luckily I managed to get enough shower gel out of the bottle for tonight but I'll have to hit Columbus tomorrow. I need to pick up some other stuff anyway."

Sam shifts closer and leans against Kurt, "How are Puck's lessons going?"

"Well enough. We didn't have much time today, so we stuck to paperwork and office crap. He thinks he can't do it, but I know he can."

"Yeah, he'll be fine. It'll just take some getting used to. Hey, didn't you have a job interview today?"

"Yep! You're looking at the proud new employee of the Lima Bean. I won't start for a couple weeks, but that's fine. It gives me time to shop for work clothes. Which I can do while I'm in Columbus tomorrow! This all works out." Kurt actually looks excited for his trip now.

"Well, that's awesome! I'm glad you're going to be getting out of the house. At least you're not all mopey. And hey! Nationals this weekend!"

"Whoo! We leave on Friday, so after I meet up with David, I can just grab my bag from the car and head over to the bus."

"I'm surprised Burt isn't being more reluctant about us not being here for Friday night dinner. He seems like he's not bothered at all." Sam seems legitimately confused by this statement and Kurt kind of wants to facepalm.

"Sam... honey, they're a married couple that live with three to five teenage boys at all times. Next Friday, said boys are all going somewhere else for the night. Why do you **think** they're excited?"

Sam blinks for a few seconds before his face morphs into a horrified stare. Then he breaks into loud chuckles and says, "Oh God. Gross. Ugh, why did you have to tell me? Ignorance is bliss, man."

Kurt just shakes his head and pats Sam on the knee. His dad had told them all at dinner that night that since they wouldn't be here this weekend, Sebastian has arranged to stay Friday night with David. He didn't say anything about Saturday night, but it's not like it matters, they'd be in Chicago. Sunday morning they'll be on a bus, on their way back from nationals. Hopefully with one less seat, filled with a giant trophy.

"Okay, well, since you're done with your shower, I'm going to jump in before Finn realizes how late it is. Have fun in Columbus tomorrow!" As Sam walks out, Kurt gets a sudden inspiration.

Pulling out his phone, Kurt calls up Mercedes, "Hey Boo, you busy after school tomorrow? I need a shopping buddy."

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian stomps into his dorm room on Monday night he's so fed up with his life at this moment that he can't see straight. Without thinking it through, he throws his lacrosse stick and helmet across the room and goes to rip off his jersey. Damn it. He didn't even stop at the locker room to grab his shit. As he tears off his pads and throws them down by the desk he thinks back to the practice he just ran out on. He knows, logically, that Chad had made a legal hit. He had no reason to push him, let alone punch him. Luckily the team broke them up before they could get helmets off. The last thing he needed was to explain having a black eye or busted lip when he got to the Hudson-Hummel house.

Remembering, Sebastian sighs and rubs a hand through his hair. _How the fuck am I going to explain to Père that I can't go back there? He'll have to come home, which will piss off Grand-mère. Especially if she finds out_ _ **why**_ _. God, so much for her oh-so-inspired plan._ He has no doubt in his mind that the boys will have told Burt and Carole what went on. Kurt will probably have demanded that Sebastian not be let back into the house, let alone his **room**.

Glancing at the clock and doing a quick calculation, Sebastian figures it's probably too late to call, but what the hell, if he's not up, he'll leave a message. His père answers on the third ring,

" **Hello? Sebastian?"**

" **Hey, Père."**

" **Hey! Is everything okay? I wanted to call earlier, but didn't you have practice today?"**

" **Yeah, I got in a fight and bailed. My head is a little too messed up to be dealing with pissed off lax players."**

" **Messed up? What's wrong? I thought the weekend went well?"**

" **Uh, who told you that?"** He must have talked to Burt last night or something. _Dammit. Now I have to tell him it was my fault this morning, if he knows everything was fine when they talked._

" **Actually, I just got off the phone with Burt about 20 minutes ago. He said you even made dinner last night. That's great! You hardly ever cook."** Stephan sounds genuinely excited, like nothing in the world is wrong.

Sebastian is at a loss. _Wait, what? Burt didn't tell my dad what happened? Or... they didn't tell Burt. Why the hell wouldn't they tell Burt?_

" **Well, it doesn't make sense to cook big family meals for just two people."** Sebastian is still confused. **"So, that's all Burt said? That things went well and I made dinner last night?"**

" **He said you were a good kid, a bit like another friend of Kurt's, Puckerman?"** _Okay, so it's good that they didn't rat me out, but for fuck's sake, please don't compare me to Kurt's boy toy._

" **Well... that's... um... okay, yeah. Things went great. Even Ladyf- Kurt was more tolerable than I thought he would be."**

" **That's great, son! I'd let you talk to Mère, but she's asleep by now. I really should be too, she's dragging me out for breakfast tomorrow."**

 _Yeah, no shit. It being so late was the only reason I risked it. The last thing I need right now is her breathing down my neck._ **"That's cool, Père. I actually gotta go, I've got to get a shower before everyone lets out of practices."**

" **Okay, son. I'll talk to you in a few days, alright?"**

" **Sure, sure. Bye, Père."**

After Sebastian hangs up the phone, he stares at it for almost a full minute before making a decision. While he waits on Burt to answer, he wipes his palms off on his shorts,

"Hello?"

"M-Mr. Hummel? It's Sebastian."

"Hey kid! Didn't see ya this morning, I guess you left before I woke up. What's up?"

Sebastian breathes out slowly, "I wanted to talk to you about this Friday. I was wondering, since the guys will be gone, if you'd like for me to stay with a friend?"

 _I can't face anyone in that house right now. Even if they don't know what happened._ _**Especially** _ _if they don't know._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so a quick thing I'd like to point out is that I totally ripped off a line of this from Sukunami. She wrote mostly Seifer/Squall, which was my first pairing. The line stolen was the comment Puck made about Kurt clenching his ass, which I stole from her story Game Restart. If you haven't read her stuff, you really should. She's amazing. (I also stole the way I determine who the focus of the story is from her...)


	8. Chapter 8

[Kurt]

 _This has been the longest week in the history of the world._ Kurt had gone to Columbus with Mercedes on Tuesday. He'd bought a new bottle of shower gel, along with another bottle that cost less than $5 but didn't 'smell like a stripper'. He'd just leave it in the bathroom, and if a certain smirky-asshole-bastard forgot his own again, he'd have a valid reason to not touch Kurt's.

He'd also picked out some cheap work clothes so he didn't have to ruin his designer wear making lattes. When he explained everything to Mercedes and asked her for help picking out Sebastian's "present" she was all for it. She did have a few good ideas, and cackled madly at his own. Said present was now sitting on Sebastian's bed. Kurt was only sorry he wouldn't be there to see his face.

Now it was Friday. Nationals are tomorrow, and Kurt is freaking out. It's really all he can think about, has been all day. He does manage to talk his teacher into letting him out of class early so he can go wait outside David's classroom. They'd arranged it so David would get there right after the bell rang for last period. He wouldn't need an escort in because no one knew he was coming. Thankfully, he didn't need a full class period for the test. He had plenty of time showing up ten minutes late and slipping in the back.

He's standing outside the classroom, wondering how much longer it will be, when Noah strolls up to him and puts his hand on Kurt's lower back.

"Hey, babe. Less than a minute now. We'll have to haul ass after we see Yogi off, if we're late we'll have to listen to Rachel screech at us for four hours."

Kurt shudders, "Oh God, don't remind me. It's going to be a long enough trip without us setting her off."

Dave comes out of the room then, saying, "We should get a head start, there **are** just three of us." He quickly takes off down the hall, pulling Kurt by the hand, with Noah following closely, one hand on Kurt's hip, like a demented, lopsided human chain. They're in the middle of the hallway when the bell rings but they don't stop. They can stop to chat and bullshit when they are out by their trucks.

It's as David goes to throw his bag into his truck that they hear running footsteps coming from the school. David grabs Kurt and pushes him behind him as he and Noah turn to face the four puckheads from Monday, and Azimio. David glares at him. "Seriously? After everything, is this really how you want it to go down?"

Glancing over the assembled hockey players, Kurt only recognizes Rick. The other three are unknown but fairly small considering the tough guy acts they're all putting on. Kurt is fairly sure either David or Puck could take all three of the extras in one go. Rick is a different story, not to mention Azimio. Puck had actually gotten in a fight with Rick last week, he didn't win it either. _Granted, that fight was on a day where Noah was by himself and was so wrapped up in his own head and feeling sorry for himself that I don't think he really cared what happened. He's known all week that today could lead to a fight._

Kurt is more worried that the two of them will spend so much time trying to protect **him** , that they'll lose their own fights. Especially between David and Azimio. He's not sure who would win, but it wouldn't be fun for either of them.

Kurt backs away from David, closer to the back of the truck to give him room to move if he needs it. The hockey players are still on the other side of Dave and Puck, so they'd still have to get through them to get to Kurt. When Kurt leaves his head and zones back in on what's going on, he's surprised to find the two smallest guys already on the ground. Apparently they'd charged in first, thinking they were all going in together, and Puck had laid them both out with one hit each.

David had yet to look away from Azimio for even a second. They weren't even talking, just staring at each other, like they're silently conversing or something. Kurt then notices that the third little one has disappeared, but that Puck already has Rick pinned to the ground and is wailing on his face. He can tell that Puck had been punched at some point, a small, dark bruise already forming on his cheek but it's clear who's going to win that fight. Before Kurt can turn back to Dave and Azimio, he hears a shoe scuff behind him.

He turns quickly, ducking mid-spin. He feels the fist barely miss him as it whizzes past his face. Not thinking about it, just reacting, Kurt skitters back a step. He quickly hauls back his foot and kicks the person in front of him in the balls, followed immediately after by a punch to the nose. When the guy drops, Kurt realizes it was the missing puckhead.

Kurt huffs and pops his hip out, crossing his arms over his chest. "Really?! You not only ran away, you snuck behind the Nav so that you could sucker punch someone? And then you pick the smallest guy?! Could you be more of a bitch?!"

Kurt is surprised to hear laughter coming from two unlikely directions. First he glances behind him to see that Azimio is almost doubled over, with tears running down his face. "Oh shit! Jesus fucking Christ. You just got your ass kicked by Hummel! Oh man! And he's right, that was a total bitch-move, Stevens."

Kurt eyes Azimio for a second before sensing that he's no longer a threat and then turns to Noah. Rick is down, not knocked out, but not really moving much either, Noah on the other hand, has moved closer, like he was running over but got stopped in his tracks by the sight of Kurt fighting. Kurt scoffs and rolls his eyes.

"Well, at least you won this time, Noah."

"Fuck that, Princess, why did you tell me you couldn't fight?" He actually seems a little disappointed that he didn't get to save the day.

"I never said I couldn't fight. I said I didn't condone violence. Self defense on the other hand, is fine. You **assumed** I couldn't fight. It was very nice of you to want to defend me though. Thanks, hun." Kurt steps closer and kisses Noah lightly over his quickly-forming bruise. Noah just sputters a little. Azimio, and now David, still laughing softly.

They're interrupted again by the other laugh that he'd heard, and forgotten about, starting again. He looks over and is only mildly surprised to see Blaine standing on the other side of the crumpled heap that used to be someone named, 'Stevens'. "That was actually me. When Kurt transferred to Dalton because of bullying, I taught him a few things. He's never going to be a great boxer or anything, but he can handle himself better than most people think." Blaine smiles at Kurt and pats his butt briefly before turning back to Stevens. "After all, he broke this dude's nose."

"Yeah, hey, about that. Why didn't you tell me it would hurt my hand so fucking much?! Oww!"

Blaine checks the hand and tells him he'll be fine, just sore. Then he adds, "Oh, the reason I was looking for you guys is because they're waiting for us at the bus. We need to hurry, we're even later now."

"Shit! Okay, come on, Noah. I'll patch you up on the bus. I brought a first aid kit." Kurt turns to David, eying Azimio again, "You sure you're going to be okay?"

David laughs, "Why, Killer? You gonna kick his ass if I'm not?" At Kurt's glare, David coughs, "Sorry, Fancy. Yeah, I'm good. Seb's here anyway. We can take Z if we have to."

Kurt looks at David, confused, until he gestures behind the trucks. Kurt turns and sees Sebastian has been standing there, for who knows how long. _Probably since Blaine got here. Damn it all._ Kurt scoffs and opens the Nav, grabbing his suitcase and the bag he'd packed for Noah of the stuff he'd left at his house, figuring Noah would forget to bring anything. Since he sees no other luggage, he knows he was right.

He tosses the backpack to Noah, who also takes Kurt's suitcase. Kurt gives David a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek, "I'll see you sometime next week, Hamhock. I want to hear the rest of this story." David nods, says goodbye, and wishes him luck with nationals.

Kurt links one arm with Blaine's, grabs Noah's free hand with the other, and heads for the bus without so much as a backwards glance at Sebastian.

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

 _As if my week wasn't confusing enough, now I have to deal with this shit?_ Sebastian is sitting in the cab of Dave's truck, waiting on Dave to finish his conversation with Azimio. School had long since let out, the bus containing a very complicated boy is long gone, and here Sebastian sat, listening to old pop songs on the radio because he doesn't listen to it enough to know the stations and can't be bothered to search.

Seb is leaning his head back, trying to sort out his thoughts. _Okay, so apparently, Hummel can fight. And he fights pretty freaking dirty._ Sebastian had gotten out of school early. His last class was canceled today and since he had study hall second-to-last period, he just took off. He figured that with the almost two hour drive, if he hurried, he could get to McKinley fast enough to watch out for Dave. He knew the protectors he had on Monday wouldn't be around today. What he hadn't counted on, and should have, was for Dave to come barreling out of the school dragging Kurt along behind him.

Not wanting to confront Kurt, especially with Puck there too, he'd hung back by his car at the edge of the lot. He'd kept an eye on them, but once they were standing at their trucks he couldn't see anything. After a quick debate, he decided to move a few rows closer, but still keep his distance until Kurt and Puck left. He was about half way to the Navigator when he was intercepted by Blaine, who looked pissed as fuck.

"Uh... hey, Blaine! I'm here to meet up with Dave..." At Blaine's continued glare, he'd sighed, "I won't even talk to him Blaine, I swear. I don't want to screw you guys up before nationals."

Blaine went to respond but Sebastian cut him off, "Wait, what the hell is that guy doing?" Without another glance at Blaine, Sebastian had run over toward the place where Kurt, Dave, and Puck were.

He got there just in time to see Kurt dodge a fist and then put the guy down. He'd just gaped openly at them until Blaine's laughter had woken him up. The look of total disgust on Kurt's face when Dave had pointed to him had been like a punch to the throat. _Okay, clearly he's still mad... I get that. I was a total ass. And what's worse, I'd meant it. Well, not about the tutu. Even Kurt's clothes were better than that. Although Kurt in a tutu would be comedy gold._

 _Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Kurt can fight. Pretty effectively. His guy was the last one to get up, and he'd been slightly bigger than Sam, and a jock. Apparently Hummel_ _**is** _ _a good kicker. The bitch-fit he'd thrown afterward had just been hilarious, and okay, hot as hell._

_And okay, yeah, there were times that Kurt had done other non-girly things. Apparently he works in his dad's garage. Enough that he has to teach Noah Puckerman. Now that he thinks about it, Puck's badass reputation was well earned. He took out three of the four attacking guys, and would have taken out the last one if Kurt hadn't. I'm starting to see why everyone freaks out about him playing lapdog to Kurt._

_Stop sidetracking damn it. Kurt also played football. Apparently he'd needed to dance to do the kick, but whatever works, I guess. And I've got to admit, his bitchy side is pretty hot. And it's not really a girl bitchy. If a girl acted like that she'd be... well, Santana. Ugh. I don't want to think about her in all this. Actually, I'm pretty well done with this whole damn thing. How long are those girls going to chat?_

He'd only listened in long enough to hear that Azimio had seen Dave in the hall and chased after him to talk. He said the hockey players had followed him, that he had no intention of fighting. They had just jumped before he could get a word in. Apparently Seb wasn't the only person surprised and impressed by 'Fancy' today. _And how the_ _ **hell**_ _does Dave not get slapped for calling him 'Fancy'?_

Sebastian had heard bits and pieces about a cousin of Azimio's named Wade, who was gay or a drag queen, or something. It was never that Dave was gay, it was that he'd lied to Az for all these years. Whatever. Dave has his friend back now, so all's well or however that goes. _I just really wish we could get the hell out of here._

When the next song starts he groans out loud. Christina Aguilera's 'Ain't No Other Man'. _Nope. Not happening._ He turns the radio off and gets out of the truck.

"Come on, Dave. As heart warming as this is, I still have to go to Kurt's to get some shit before we hit your house. Can we go? You guys can braid each others' hair later."

Azimio laughs, "You do have a type don't you, dude? He's as bitchy as Hummel."

Dave actually makes a face like he's grossed out. _What the fuck? I'm hot! Oh, he's going to regret that._

Sebastian drops his voice into a seductive purr, "Come on, Davey! I really need to go! When we get to your house I'll even do that thing with my tongue-"

"Oh my God! Sebastian! **Shut up**!" Dave is now eight shades of red and Sebastian smirks at him. "Az! We're not dating! Jesus. He's just a friend. An **asshole** , but a friend."

"But Davey, you said you like my assh-"

" **AHH**! No! Shut up!" Dave turns to Az, now looking panicked. "He's not my boyfriend, but I have to get him out of here, because he's totally shameless and I really don't want to know what he'll say next. Go get your car, Seb, I'll follow you." Dave gives Azimio a fist bump and then climbs into his truck.

_Heh. I win. You don't know who your fucking with Davey._

* * *

 

_What. The. Fuck._

Sebastian could tell, if he'd actually stopped to think about it, that his face is frozen in a mask of horrified wonder. He really shouldn't be surprised. They'd warned him. Not only the boys in question, but Dave too, they'd all warned him. And they were right. He really **didn't** know who he was fucking with. He's still frozen in horror when a flash of light breaks him out of it, and he whips his head around to blink at Dave. **Who'd just taken a picture of him with his phone.** That **asshole**!

"Sorry, dude, that was too good. Fancy might actually forgive me for coming into his room if I give him this." Dave laughs and moves closer to the "gift" on the bed, taking a picture of it too. That pulls his attention back to the professional looking gift basket sitting on his bed. It's a big basket, wrapped in clear cellophane and topped with a huge rainbow-colored bow. He really shouldn't be surprised. But he is. _Oh my god. Kurt Hummel has a sense of humor. A_ _ **very**_ _fucked up one._

Sebastian can't pick out which item in the basket is the worst one. At first he'd thought it was obvious, the Summer's Eve Douche. Then he'd thought maybe it was the giant sparkling pink dildo with a note on it that says "For when you go fuck yourself!" But actually, if he has to pick one, he'd think it's the heavy card stuck in the back of the basket, which on the front has a picture of a 7 yr old girl throwing a tantrum and inside, in fancy hand written script it says:

10 Helpful Tips And Hints To Help You Remove Sand From Your Vagina! -Which he laughs at until he reads through it, and realizes they're real tips with advice on how to remove sand from lady parts. Gross. Except number ten which is simply, "Get the fuck over yourself and grow the hell up!" Dave is all but curled up on the floor laughing. He actually might not recover. Sebastian wishes he could just be pissed about it. But he's actually fairly impressed too. _Who knew he had it in him? Well, aside from everyone but me, apparently._

He digs through the basket, finding everything from strawberry flavored lube to body glitter. He finds a cheap lace, black and green colored pair of women's thongs. A truly massive box of condoms. A cock ring, it's purple and the package says "Guaranteed to keep your minute man from ruining the moment!" A box of laxatives, because according to another note, he looked constipated. A tube of Monistat, which Seb had to Google and is apparently for an itchy vagina. _He's really not letting that go._

There's also brochures. He doesn't know where Kurt got them but stuck in the back are pamphlets that say things like 'When to stop talking!', 'Is that a zit or an STD?', 'Why is there blood in my pee?', and 'Having gay sex, am I doing it wrong?'.

When Dave finally recovers enough to get up off the floor, Sebastian just looks at him. "Really, man? Who's side are you on?"

Dave scoffs. "Duh, his. You were a total douche. You deserve this. Besides if you try to tell me you won't use half of this stuff, especially the dildo, I'm calling you a liar."

Sebastian actually stops and picks up the dildo. "I dunno dude, this thing is pretty big. I'd definitely have to work my way up to it. Don't think I've ever taken anything this big before." Before Sebastian can really think about what he's just said and be embarrassed of the conversation he is now apparently having, Dave says,

"Really? This is considered that big? Huh." Sebastian stops and stares at Dave for a solid 45 seconds before Dave realizes what he just implied and blushes. "Shut up, Sebastian."

"No, see, now we have to talk about the fact that you're hung like a horse. Are you fucking kidding me? It's bigger than this?" Seb shamelessly waves the fake nine inch glittery cock at Dave.

Dave takes that as his hint to leave. "Okay! On that note, I'm leaving! You know where I live, and you said you wanted to take your car anyway. I'm not even sure why I'm here. Although, I got to see you open this, so it was totally worth it. If you're not at my house in 20 minutes, I'm texting Kurt to tell him your taking your new dildo for a test drive." and he walks out the door.

Sebastian piles everything back into the basket and sets it in the closet while he digs out clothes and shoves them in a bag. "I need new friends."

* * *

 

[Kurt]

They're almost to Illinois when Kurt gets a text, and it turns out to be a picture of a horrified Sebastian who looks frozen in shock. Dave follows it with, 'Seb loved your gifts'. Kurt laughs, drawing the attention of Noah and Blaine, both seated fairly close to him on the bus. Since they both knew about the basket, he showed them the picture.

He doesn't text Dave back right away, not really in the mood to get into a conversation when he's with Sebastian. Kurt puts his phone away and turns to talk to Brittany.

* * *

 

Kurt really can't believe how nervous he is. Of course he's not doing as bad as Noah and Sam, who actually got into a screaming match last night. _Seriously though, Noah knew the dance and even if he didn't, his future is more important. Not that I'd say that to this group of rabid wolverines._

Luckily Mr. Shue had excused Noah from dancing and got Artie to help him, so Kurt doesn't feel guilty concentrating on learning steps instead of Noah graduating.

But see, now it's time to find out if it was worth it. If it was worth possibly jeopardizing Noah's future, taking time away he could have been studying to come to Chicago. Kurt waits. He's holding Blaine's hand, Noah staying as far away from him as he can so he won't slip up and do something embarrassing in front of hundreds, or thousands, of people. Kurt is barely breathing at this point.

When they announce the winner, Kurt almost collapses. Everyone around him is screaming, hugging, kissing, crying. Sam hugs Finn and then gives Noah a huge kiss on the top of his head before running over to Kurt, who by that point is bouncing up and down, hand in hand with Blaine. Sam scoops him up and gives him a huge bear hug. As soon as he's put on his feet, Finn grabs him into a tight, if brief hug. When Finn steps away to find Rachel, Kurt sees Puck pumping his fist and runs at him, throwing his arms around him. The mohawked boy laughs and squeezes him back.

_We did it!_

* * *

 

That night when they get back to the hotel room, they are all so pumped up they can't stop screaming. Eventually they get a call from the front desk asking them to please keep it down, but congratulations on their victory! They settle down when Mr. Shue comes in to tell them to knock it off, they have an early bus tomorrow and will need sleep.

He'd finally gotten around to texting David back. He'd thanked him for the picture and told him he was off the hook for going into his room without him there, as long as he hadn't touched anything. After calling his dad to tell him the good news, he'd texted Dave again, sending a picture of the sky-scraping trophy with his housemates and Noah posing around it for size comparison.

As Kurt does the quickest nightly routine he's done in years, he listens to all the rough-housing going on outside the bathroom. _Ugh. Boys. Thank god for the extra bed. Sharing with Noah and Blaine is awkward enough, imagine trying to share with the painfully straight, back-slapping type? I'd sleep in the bathtub._

He actually hadn't even known that triple, or 'family' rooms existed. The joys of Chicago. Even still, trying to cram nine teenage boys into three queen beds was a bit too optimistic. _Luckily I'd already slept in a bed with both of them. Not at the same time though. And for very different reasons. Ugh. The jokes that will spawn from this..._

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

Sebastian doesn't head back to the Hudmel house until late on Saturday, long after dinner. He'd been given a house key, and had used it the day before because no one was home, but he didn't really want to just walk in... it still didn't really feel like his house, especially after what he did to Kurt. He decides to knock twice and then open the door without waiting for someone to come open it. That way if there is anyone around, they're warned but don't have to get up.

He steps inside to find Burt and Carole looking a little too comfortable on the couch and Sebastian flushes and darts up the stairs with a quick, "Hey guys! Going to shower, had a long day. See you in the morning!" He hears snickering from the living room and decides parents are evil.

He unpacks the few things he took with him to Dave's and heads for the bathroom. _It's so weird, I'm the only one here._ As he goes to reach for his shower gel he realizes he left it. Again. Then he notices a new bottle on the bottom edge of the bathtub and opens it. _Hmm, not bad. It looks new... I bet Kurt bought it. Well, it's a hell of a lot more subtle than Axe, and at least I haven't done much today, so I can get away with using a little... right?_

He uses the smallest about he can and makes sure the lid is tight down, putting it back on the tub's edge. He almost uses a washcloth to push it into the corner and prop it up, just in case. Then he realizes he's being ridiculous. _Seriously, if I end up with a shower gel complex over this, I'll be forced to kick my own ass._

When he comes out of the bathroom in only a towel, he looks around the room. _It's just so freaking quiet. Is it weird to miss the sound of guys messing around and screaming at each other? It's been over two weeks since I was in a house this quiet. I didn't notice how much I liked the noise._ He'd always thought that living alone with his père had made him appreciate silence. Apparently that was very much not the case.

Sighing to himself, he goes to the closet to get a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. After he's dressed he stares down at the basket, not really knowing what to do with it. He knows he can't just leave it out. There's the smallest chance that Kurt hasn't told everyone else what he did and Sebastian will do anything to keep them from finding out. He picks it up and sets it back on his bed, finally going through it and making two piles. One is a pile of stuff to keep, either to use himself, or to give away, if it's not too embarrassing. The other is a straight up, 'throw it away' pile. No one needs to know he ever owned, however briefly, a tube of Monistat.

He won't even throw it away here, because he puts nothing past these guys. He'll take it to a McDonald's parking lot or something. Sadly, the 'throw it away' pile isn't as full as he'd hoped it'd be. _Wow, the things you learn about yourself when you get gag gifts. I wonder if anyone else ever had the revelation that they're kinkier than they thought, and it's all their friends' fault?_

He'd just picked up the body glitter, _I was going to throw it away, I swear!_ , when he dropped it. The little jar had rolled away, under Kurt's bed and all the way to the other side of it. _He would be the_ _ **only**_ _teenager in America to not have anything under his bed that would stop it from going way the fuck over there._

Grunting, Sebastian goes over and gets down on his hands and knees, looking for the jar. He grabs it up quickly and goes to stand when he notices that there's something taped to the bottom of the table in front of him. Before he can really think it through, he's pulling it off and standing up. _It's a tape. Who the hell still uses-_ He stops. _It's a tape. From a camcorder. Which would make it a few years old, because seriously, who's still doing that? … it's_ _ **the**_ _tape._

Sebastian tosses the jar over to his bed and starts searching the room for the camcorder. It's the easiest way to watch it. He's starting to get desperate when he finally turns to the closet, pulling it open and looking at the shelves. He briefly considers the trunk he'd thought the tape was hidden in, but decides that it's unlikely. _It's not very big and honestly, I'm sure Kurt had enough to hide that he didn't even think about the camera._ Before he resorts to breaking the lock on the trunk he decides to poke around the baskets and boxes on the shelf first.

After about five minutes of fruitless search he hits pay dirt. The camera had been tucked between boxes on an upper shelf, so he hadn't even needed to dig into personal stuff. _Maybe that will keep Kurt from coming after me when he hears about this?_

Sebastian takes the camera and sits on Kurt's bed, since his is currently covered in feminine hygiene products. He leans forward with his elbows on his knees so he can watch the tiny screen. It's shot in black and white, and when he first sees Kurt he has to pause it for a second. _Holy shit! I thought he was baby-faced now! Jesus. He looks like 12 years old! This was sophomore year?! That was just two years ago. Damn. He's changed a lot in two years... I guess I was more focused on his... assets when I was watching the Cheerio clip. Damn._

He hits play. He watches the video all the way through no less than six times before he finally stops. _Okay. So... apparently two years ago, Kurt Hummel was the most innocent and obvious virgin in the world, over the age of ten. Even back then though, he'd had the hips. I almost feel like a pedo watching this, which is fucked up. He was only a year younger than I am now! But yeah, obvious innocence aside, he'd already known how to dance. He's been working the hips a lot longer than I thought. And that bitchy attitude? Was he_ _ **born**_ _with it? Oh god. Burt saw this? He_ _ **walked in**_ _on this? And Kurt wasn't_ _ **out**_ _yet?! Yeah, not surprised that he came out shortly after. If your comfortable enough to do_ _ **this**_ _, it's safe to say, 'Hey Dad, I like boys.'_

Sebastian groans and flops back on the bed. _Great. Now I'm thinking about 'Born This Way'. Jesus. Maybe I_ _ **should**_ _try to fuck him? He's clearly not the innocent little 'Gay Face' I thought he was. Well, he_ _ **was**_ _, but not now. Shit, not by comparison. Ugh. Who am I kidding. I can't fuck Hummel. Even if I wanted to, there's just no way in hell. If for no other reason, Puck would tear my arms off and beat me to death with 'em._

 _So, just to recap, because I like to keep my mental breakdowns organized: Kurt Hummel was as innocent as a Keebler Elf two short years ago. He was born a bitchy ice queen. I find that bitchy ice queen unquestionably hot. I can never_ _**tell him** _ _I find that bitchy ice queen unquestionably hot. He is now more bitchy and much less innocent. I find that even_ _**more** _ _hot. I can still never tell him._

Sebastian groans and gets up, putting the camera on the bed and moving back to his own to clear it off. He grabs the 'keep' pile and shoves everything in the bottom of his duffel bag until he can stop off at his house and hide most of it. He wraps the 'no' pile up in the cellophane, to be thrown away no later than tomorrow, and tucks it in the bag too, near the top. He's left staring at the basket and the bow. He picks the bow apart until it's just a rainbow ribbon and rolls it up, sticking that in the bag too. _What the hell am I going to do with a huge basket?_

Suddenly he has an idea, a use for the damned basket and a way to get back on the boys' good sides. _Well, it'll help. I still really need to apologize to Kurt though._ Finally, he's left with nothing else to do and turns back to Kurt's bed and the camera that sits on it. Before he can stop himself, or really even decide to do it, he's watching the video one more time. _He really was just too freakin cute though. It's kind of insane that he can look that bitchy and that adorable. Ugh. I'm a total girl right now. Jeez._

When it's over, he pops the tape out and puts the camera back where he found it. He's holding the tape, trying to decide what to do with it. _He wasn't just hiding it from me. He didn't want Puck or, I'm assuming, anyone else seeing it either. If I found it, they could. I should just... keep it. I'd be doing him a favor. No one will look for it with my stuff. And really, these guys aren't interested enough in anything to do with me to look through my shit anyway._

Before he can talk himself out of it, he walks over to his guitar case and hides the tape in the storage compartment. He then decides, screw it, nothing better to do, and grabs his guitar, scooting back on the bed. Leaning back against the window, Sebastian at first is just messing around, making sure it's tuned. Eventually he falls into one of his favorite songs, even though it was written when he was still in diapers. Whatever.

He plays 'When The Lights Go Out' by Five, because it's one of the few songs he can remember all of without looking it up. He tries not to put any special emphasis to the song, but he's not sure it works. Usually singing makes him feel better, but by the time he's done he's kind of feeling worse about everything. He puts his guitar away and lays down, hoping to fall asleep quickly.

 _It's a song about sex, for fuck's sake! And okay, a little about feelings but, shit! It's not like I really want to sleep with him. And according to Dave, it's not like he'd touch me with a ten foot pole either. He doesn't sleep with friends... well I'm not his_ _ **friend**_ _. But he probably only wants a relationship. Ugh. Even if I was up for that, he definitely wouldn't start one right before he moves away to New York. It's probably the only thing keeping him and Puck from fucking. If they aren't actually fucking. Which I don't think they are. I wouldn't really be surprised either way though._ Sick to death of his own thoughts and feelings, Sebastian purposely lays down, closes his eyes and does nothing except go over his previous lax games in his head.

_Is it morning yet?_


	9. Chapter 9

[Kurt]

Kurt doesn't get home until almost noon on Sunday. He'd hoped to be home early enough to convince Carole to cook breakfast. By now though, she's gone. So, it probably means cereal. He's had nothing but vendor snacks and fast food for days and he's honestly just tired of the cheapness of it. _But screw it, there's no way I'm going to cook after watching Rachel and Finn make googly eyes at each other for four hours. This day is off to a **wonderful** start. Not to mention there's probably a meerkat in my room. Ugh._

The first thing he does is pass Finn his bag, asking him to take it up and drop it in the hallway. He'll get it later, he doesn't want to see Sebastian yet.

"Sure, little brother!" Finn runs off, with a slightly scheming smile. _He's probably hoping for a shower to get the smell of Rachel's perfume off before people think it's his._ Shaking his head, Kurt heads for the kitchen. He's about half way there when he sees the basket sitting on the kitchen table.

At first he's horrified. _That asshole wouldn't actually leave **that** down here would he?!_ But when he looks closer he sees that it's been emptied of it's more... questionable items. Instead it's filled with baked goods. Everything from muffins and cookies, to pastries and croissants. Kurt cautiously moves closer and picks up a muffin. It's some sort of mixed berries and maple syrup combo from the smell of it. Kurt is just debating trying it when he hears someone coming down the stairs.

He's only mildly shocked when he sees Sebastian standing about five feet away, looking at him warily. _Finn ratted me out. He told him I was down here so he could get 'alone time' in the shower. Ugh, gross. I'll get him for this._

"Um... Finn said you wanted to talk to me?" Sebastian is actually shifting from foot to foot. If Kurt wasn't so pissed off, he'd be amused.

He growls lowly, "No. Actually, I told him to take my bag up so I could **avoid** you. So much for brotherly love."

Kurt goes to put the muffin back when Sebastian cuts in, "Um, that's a whole-grain, strawberry, raspberry, and blackberry muffin. Most of the stuff in there is healthy, or at least not as bad as like, Pop Tarts."

"Oh, quite the high achievement. Are they also healthier than crack and heroin?" Kurt snarks back.

"No! What I meant is that some of that stuff is vegan, some of it is like that, just **kind of** good for you, but the chocolate stuff is like, only mildly better than donuts. I can't use chocolate substitute. I just can't. I'm French." Sebastian looks worried that he's said something too snobby and stuck up. Kurt isn't about to tell him that he agrees with him, so he just keeps the muffin and sits down to eat it.

After a bit of silence, Sebastian asks, "So, where's Sam and Puck? I only heard you and Finn come in."

"This was supposed to be a Kentucky weekend for Sam, so his parents drove up and surprised him. They were waiting to take him out for the night when we got off the bus. He'll probably stay in their hotel room tonight, with Stevie and Stacey. Noah decided to go home and celebrate his win with his mom and sister. I helped Sarah bake him a cake on Thursday, I just hope she got the letters right. I couldn't help her because I didn't know if it'd be a 'congrats!' cake or a 'at least we have cake!' cake." Kurt shrugs this off, like it's no big deal that he spent hours, on a school night, right before a major competition, helping a little girl make a cake, just to make his friend smile.

Sebastian continues to shift around, looking anywhere but at Kurt and eventually the smaller boy snaps, "For fuck's sake, if you're going to stay, either dance better or sit down."

Quickly moving to sit down at the table, Sebastian finally gets the balls to look up at Kurt, who is scowling at his half-eaten breakfast. "Is there something wrong with it? I don't think that's one of the ones I taste-tested..."

Kurt had already guessed that Sebastian had made the whole basket of food but he's still a little stumped on what to do or say about it. _This would have taken hours, why the hell would he bother?_

Kurt snaps, "It's **fine**." Sebastian deflates a little, looking down at his hands resting on the table. _Ugh! Why should I feel guilty?! He's the asshole!_ "Fine! They're awesome! Where the hell did you learn to bake like this? And don't say Paris, or I'll hit you."

He chuckles at that but says, "Actually, it **was** in Paris but it was my grand-mère that taught me. She knew my père was useless in the kitchen so she taught me enough dishes to not starve between pizza and chinese deliveries."

Kurt grunts, suddenly remembering the conversation he'd heard last week. _What was that about anyway? What was his grandmother planning and why couldn't he see it working? He was so against it. And why did he lie to everyone about what she was doing?_

"So, do you and your grandmother get along? Because last time you mentioned her you were decidedly unhappy. Maybe she was just lonely?"

Sebastian scoffs, grabbing a peanut butter cookie and crumbling it up with his fingers. "Usually? Yes, we get along fine. **When she isn't scheming to ruin my life.** "

Pausing as he hears Sebastian mutter in French, Kurt wonders if he should just go ahead and tell him that he's not as alone in his speech as he thinks he is... Just as he's opening his mouth his eyes rest on the basket and suddenly he's reminded that this is just his newest turn of Sebastian's game of hot and cold. _UGH! No. I'm not telling him shit. He still hasn't really apologized. The shit he said, and implied? Fuck that. If he has such a problem with me he can just leave._

Kurt glares at him, "So, why are you here? I figured by now you'd have told your dad you couldn't stand to come here any more. My face won't get any 'straighter' and my clothes won't get any more butch. I wore flannel for a week once and I'm never doing it again."

Sebastian takes a minute to try to picture Kurt in flannel and snickers a little. This appears to be the wrong thing to do because Kurt just scoffs angrily and gets up. He throws the rest of the muffin away, like he can't even stomach the sight of it anymore. Sebastian scrambles away from the chair and stands in front of Kurt, hands out in surrender.

"Wait! Wait! I'm sorry! I was just trying to picture you in one of Burt's shirts and I couldn't hold it back! You can't tell me that's a good look!"

Kurt grunts and crosses his arms over his chest, but stops. "Whatever Sebastian, I'm done with this. You want to be an asshole, and turn on people for no reason, go ahead. Leave me out of it. I've got enough drama and bullshit going on."

"I'm sorry! Really! Last weekend was really fucked up for me okay? I went from thinking my grand-mère, the only woman that's ever meant a damned thing to me, was dying, to her essentially playing a prank on me! Then, before I even have a chance to process that and the shit she said, you hit me over the head with you and Blaine breaking up! And I gotta say Kurt, if there was one couple I was sure would make it, it was you and Blaine. You got a little jealous yeah, but... You were just so confident. No matter what I said or did, I knew that I wouldn't be able to break you guys up."

Sebastian swallows, looking like he's expecting to be hit, "I admit, that pissed me off to no end at first. So I kept trying. But eventually I got used to it. When I saw him, my mind went 'Oh, Kurt's boyfriend is here.' and when I saw you, it was 'Blaine's boyfriend'. When I befriended him after the slushy thing, I really was expecting to be asked to help him propose to you one day, in some grand gesture. Then all the sudden, 'Oh hey! We broke up. But look at this really hot guy I hang all over! Aren't we cute?'. I didn't handle that well."

Kurt sputters, "Wait, what?! **That's** what your problem was?! **Me and Noah?!** "

Sebastian winces, "I really don't know how to put it without pissing you off... Kind of? But not really?" At Kurt's continued glare, he tries again, "I'd spent months seeing you as 'Blaine's innocent boyfriend'. Then, as soon as I'm let into your personal life, I'm given the impression that you've been cheating on Blaine with Puck, and that everyone in your life knew about it, including Blaine! I was **really** confused! But I didn't feel like I was allowed to just ask, 'So hey, are you fucking Puckerman?' Eventually I caught on that Puck wasn't just 'the other woman', that there were real feelings there, not that I really know what those feelings are. And it's not my business! So I don't ask!"

Now it's Kurt who's confused, _So... what's the point?_

"Ugh! I really didn't know what was going on with me, or how I felt about any of this! Between Grand-mère's theory and talking to Dave-" Sebastian cuts himself off.

Kurt blinks at him... _Is he actually going to tell me what she said?_ "Wait, what? What theory? And what did Dave say?"

"Um, nothing Kurt, it's personal. Shit, all of this is personal. All you really need to know is that my head was a mess and I kept going around in circles. Every time I turned around you proved yourself to be less and less of the stereotypical, girly prude I'd spent months thinking you were. All the sudden you weren't 'Blaine's Boyfriend', 'Gay Face', or 'Betty White', you were someone I could have been friends with if I'd pulled my head out of my ass in time. It was weird for me. And I couldn't handle it, so I snapped and did shitty things to you. I guess I was convinced that if I said that shit loud enough, they'd be true again, and the world would keep spinning."

Kurt looks less confused, but still... something. It still wasn't right. It wasn't fixed. "I really **am** sorry. I didn't mean the shit I said last week. For one thing, a frilly pink tutu would really **not** go well with your arms and chest. Sorry. You might have been able to pull it off back in your Gaga days, but now you'd look ridiculous... Damn it!"

Before Kurt can stop himself, he says, "What?"

"Sam was supposed to bring the group picture so I could see the Gaga/Kiss costumes. I really wanted to see Puck and Finn in make-up. He won't be back before I go back to Dalton. Shit. Oh well, he probably wouldn't have brought it now anyway." Sebastian notices that Kurt is biting his lip and thinking about something. "What?"

He coughs, "Actually, I have a copy of that picture. I worked damned hard on that costume. Hell, I still have the shoes."

Debating only for a few seconds Sebastian asks, "Can I see it? I swear I'll only laugh the appropriate amount."

"I appreciate the honesty... fine. Come on." Kurt takes a few steps before turning back around and grabbing another muffin. When he notices Sebastian's smirk, he says, "Shut up." and goes upstairs.

After directing Sebastian to the bed so he can't see inside the closet, Kurt goes in and opens the chest, slipping the picture out. He quickly re-locks it and hands the picture to Sebastian, sitting at the vanity to eat the muffin.

Looking at the picture, Sebastian can't help but laugh. "Oh wow. You don't even stand out in this picture. Which is amazing because you're wearing shiny silver from head to toe and ten inch heals! How did you walk in those things?"

"Not easily. Took a lot of practice. I made them myself, I had to. I couldn't find anything close in women's sizes. Even back then, I wore a ten in shoe. Now it's eleven. So even if I were so inclined, I can't wear women's shoes."

If Sebastian seems surprised by any of this, he doesn't let it show. "You guys really go all out for your costumes. This was just a weekly assignment?"

Kurt nods, "Yeah, Mr. Shue is great. He even admitted at the end of the week he didn't really have a point to it, just wanted us to have fun with it."

"I really don't know how you didn't get your ass kicked wearing that to school though. Especially **that** school." Sebastian shakes his head, handing the picture back. "Can I see the shoes? You said you still have them, right?"

Kurt nods, finishing the muffin and standing up, putting the picture back above his dresser where it had been two weeks ago. He turns to the closet and starts digging in the back, eventually saying, "Well, I almost did. This was the beginning of the whole 'Karofsky-has-the-hots-for-me-so-he-has-to-beat-me-up' thing. He and Azimio cornered me alone once when I was wearing it. That's when I told them that being different was the best thing about me, and if they didn't like it, they could go ahead and hit me. Luckily I was saved by Finn, who showed up in a floor-length red rubber dress- Oh! Found 'em!"

Kurt walks back out of the closet holding giant bedazzled shoes and presents them to Sebastian. Who is staring at Kurt with his mouth open.

Kurt is confused again, "What?"

"Why the hell had Finn shown up in a rubber dress?"

Kurt smiles, "Because he'd called me a fag."

Sebastian just sits and blinks for a few seconds, interrupted by the bathroom door opening, "Dude! You kept your shoes? I wish I'd thought of that. I only kept the arm bands from Kiss and the eye things from the dress."

Kurt scoffs, "True, but you get to keep your football jersey and your letterman jacket."

"You got to keep your jersey too!" Finn points out.

"Yea, but I was only in football for like a week. I didn't get to keep the Cheerios uniform, Coach Sue took it back." Kurt is actually rather upset by that. _It's not like anyone else wore it! I was one of the only guys on the team and I was definitely the smallest._

Sebastian shrugs, "It wouldn't fit now anyway, would it?"

Kurt sighs, "Probably not."

After a minute, Finn speaks up, "So, do either of you know if we're still going to the movies tonight? I mean, Sam's not here and if we see Avengers without him he'll totally kill me."

"Actually, I asked him before he left. Apparently, he's going to see it with his family anyway. I'll probably have to go again with Noah to see it sometime after his test, since he's going to spend the day at home, probably keep studying." Kurt is starting to get worried that Noah is burning out. Mr. Shue had talked his teacher into giving him more time after nationals, so they still have a week. He'll have to hunt Noah down tomorrow and talk to him about pacing himself. He needs to breathe.

"Well, we still have a few hours before Burt and Mom get back, I'm gonna go see if anyone is on Live." Kurt stands up and goes to shut the door after Finn leaves, not wanting to listen to the yelling that will occur when he gets going on Xbox.

When he turns back around, Sebastian is staring at his feet. It's really weird to see him this uncertain. The only time he's ever been anything like this was after Dave...

"What's wrong?"

Sebastian seems to snap out of his thoughts, "So, are we okay? I don't really know what else I can say except to keep saying sorry, and that'll annoy you eventually."

Kurt laughs softly, "Yeah, we're okay. Honestly, what you said wasn't anything I haven't heard before. I just overreacted."

Sebastian eyes him warily, "No, you didn't. If someone said that shit to me, I'd punch them in the face. Thank you for not doing that by the way. I didn't know to be grateful for that at the time, but after seeing you take down a hockey player, I know the bullet I dodged."

"Pretty sure he was more upset about his balls actually. Granted, by now the nose is still hurting and the balls should have recovered. Eww. Okay, let's stop talking about that guy's genitalia." Kurt shudders lightly.

Sebastian says with a wide smirk, "What? I thought jocks were your type?"

"Ugh, not ones with mullets- wait. Who told you jocks were my type? I mean, you knew about Finn but Blaine is anything but a jock..." Kurt suddenly looks a little pissed off.

"Dave told me more about the crap that went on back then, and he mentioned it." Kurt seems relieved and that just intrigues Sebastian more. "How did you think I knew?"

It's Kurt's turn to shift uncomfortably now. "Well, back then, Dave wasn't the only guy that thought I was out to 'molest and convert' straight boys." Seeing Sebastian's blank look, Kurt says, "When Sam first moved here I flirted with him, trying to find out if he was into guys, and Finn... didn't handle it well. He kind of made me feel like a pedophile with a windowless van. He went to great lengths to keep me away from Sam. He even told his mom that I had molested him the year before or something."

Sebastian let's a sharp laugh escape at this, "You molested Finn?"

"No! Well, not really? Okay look, Finn is an awesome brother, and he's really sweet... but he's **very** stupid. I tried flirting somewhat subtly at first and got no reaction. I slapped his ass in front of the entire school once and all I got was a startled glance. He never said stop! He would look around, like he was afraid people would see, but he never actually said, 'Hey! I'm not into dudes, so stop it.' Frankly, I liked him enough to keep going until I knew for sure. Backfired big time. As previously mentioned, it ended in us having a fight and him referring to things around my room as 'faggy'. Dad overheard him, and it was just a whole lot of drama."

He snickers again, "Okay, and this was before Sam?"

Kurt sighs, "Yeah, when the Sam thing came up, Finn tried to get me to back off and I didn't think I was doing anything wrong, so I said no. Then my dad said that I had to be careful not to hit on straight guys, because he'd heard what had happened with Finn. He said it sounded like I was taking advantage of Sam... So I let Sam off the hook and sang Le Jazz Hot by myself."

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, "What does any of this have to do with you getting pissed off about me knowing your type?"

Kurt coughs and looks away, "I thought... Finn, or one of the other guys, might have warned you to keep your distance from me so I wouldn't prey on you, too."

Sebastian keeps a perfectly blank face. "Kurt... I don't know how to tell you this... but... I'm gay."

Throwing a pillow at Sebastian's smirk, Kurt says, "I know that, asshole! But I thought that maybe... since you play lacrosse, and you're clearly not into me, Finn would have warned you anyway... or something. I mean, for the most part Finn is comfortable around me now. He's much better about the gay stuff, but honestly that's probably because Noah takes PDA a bit far around him just to fuck with him. I don't know how he'll react to new guys coming in that aren't used to me. He seems to be under the impression that I should come with a warning label."

Sebastian smirks and says, "Well, that's just unfair as hell. Even I've seen him and Rachel be downright sickening. They never care what they're doing around other people."

"Oh God, you don't even know. You should have been on the bus from Chicago, I swear I thought I was going to throw up. Meanwhile, I was barely allowed to hold hands with Blaine without getting funny looks when we were dating. I think the only reason he doesn't say anything to Noah, especially at school, is because Noah would just taunt him more. So far he's kept his hands mostly to himself, but if Finn tries to stop him, Gaga only knows what he'd do." Kurt smiles slightly.

"Wait, I thought Puck wouldn't do PDA. That's why the she-hobbit freaked out right?"

"Oh, those rules have left the building. The time apart and the realization that I'm leaving soon has pushed Noah over the edge. He pulled me into his lap in the lunchroom on Monday. It got worse from there. Every time I walk with him in the halls I keep expecting his hand on my ass or something. It's coming, I know it is."

"He's probably saving it for when Finn makes a comment he doesn't like." Sebastian seems highly amused.

"Probably." Kurt seems less so.

"Well, I find the whole thing **very** hypocritical. I've seen straight guys rub their... crotches against girls to get attention, and I'm willing to bet you never went that far."

Kurt actually turns a little green at the idea. "Please never joke about my dick touching my brother again."

A shocked laugh leaves Sebastian, "Oh my God. Kurt Hummel just said dick! And I went to such lengths to censor myself!"

Kurt glares, but not with the same heat he had only an hour ago. "No one asked you to. Between Sam and Noah, I'm pretty much immune. And I think I've corrupted Blaine. When we were at lunch Monday-"

"You mean when you were in Puck's lap?"

"Shut up. And yes. Anyway, Blaine kept making sex jokes. It took me a minute to recover from the looks on people's faces. I guess I never noticed that Blaine and I were so prudish around other people until we started doing things like climbing into the laps of straight boys and making jokes about threesomes." Kurt shrugs. "It's probably got more to do with the guys being comfortable listening to the jokes than us actually making them. That and Blaine and I aren't really alone anymore so we have to talk in front of people."

"So the whole prudish schoolmarm thing was an act to protect you from homophobes?" Sebastian looks a little disbelieving.

"I wouldn't go that far. We were also pretty shy, especially before we actually had sex. But we were definitely keeping things private. This is Ohio, and I just can't pull off a 'got my ass kicked in fight club' kind of look."

Sebastian seems to be debating something, eventually saying, "So, if I wanted to get revenge on Finn for his closet homophobia and start acting the way Sam or Puck do with you, you'd be okay with that?"

Kurt has to stop and think about that for a second. _Well, if we're going to be friends, I guess it's fine... Maybe not to the degree of Noah, but I doubt he'd want to take it that far anyway. Honestly, as tactile as I am, I'm sure he'll get uncomfortable before I will._ Kurt snorts, _Oh God! Gay Chicken with two actual gay dudes. That could end very badly._

Kurt shrugs again. "Fuck it, sure. You'll have to watch it around my dad though, because you're actually gay, and in my room. If he gets a threesome vibe from us and Noah, he **will** send you packing."

Sebastian is speechless for a bit, eventually managing, "I didn't think you'd actually agree to me touching you."

Kurt rolls his eyes, "Despite all appearances to the contrary, I'm not actually a virgin anymore, Seb. Light touching, even from another gay guy, isn't going to give me palpitations."

Not commenting on the nickname, Sebastian says, "There's a difference between 'virginity' and 'innocence'. I'm pretty sure I lost my innocence **way** before I lost my virginity. You, on the other hand, couldn't look more pure if you were wearing a habit and a rosary."

Kurt huffs at that. "I get it, I have the face of a preteen and anyone attracted to me is a child molester. Trust me, I don't need you to tell me that."

"No, that's not really what I meant. Honestly, when I first met you, yeah. I thought that way, that you had the gayest, most innocent face ever. Then I saw those pictures." Sebastian nods his head at the old glee photos from sophomore year. "You've changed a lot and your face will probably always have an innocent quality to it but that's not really a bad thing."

Kurt is back to glaring now. "How is looking like a child not a bad thing?"

"You don't look like a child, you look innocent. It's the whole thumbs can be fingers thing. You don't have to look like a child to look innocent. The most expensive hookers are the ones that look like virgins. Guys want to feel like they got there first, you definitely give off an untouched vibe."

"Well, you sure have changed your tune. You called me 'Gay Face' less than a week ago." Kurt raises an eyebrow, remembering all the shit that Sebastian said last Monday.

He has the grace to wince, "Okay, but see, that was part of me trying to convince myself that nothing was changing. If I said you were girly, maybe I could convince myself I still saw you that way. For the record, it didn't work. I won't ever really be able to see you as the prude with no sex appeal ever again."

Kurt is completely shocked by that statement. _He thinks I have_ _ **sex appeal**_ _? What the hell has he been thinking this week?!_ Kurt wishes he could pretend he didn't squeak, "What?!"

Sebastian doubles over at the look on Kurt's face. "Chill! God, it's not like I'm going to molest you. Well, not without Finn around to see it. It's possible to find someone attractive and not hump their leg. I find all manner of people hot that I'll never make a real move on. I joke around a lot but I'd never actually sleep with Dave. And he's hot as hell."

Kurt actually relaxes, "I'm totally with you on that one, so I think I understand. Although, and if you tell him this, I'll happily murder you, I did have a crush on David freshman year."

Sebastian's eyes bug out, "No way!" At Kurt's sage nod he says, "Do you have any idea what he would do if he knew that?!"

"Exactly! That's why he can't know. He's mostly over me, and he **has** to get over me. We wouldn't work as a couple at all. He's too vulnerable and I'm too bitchy. I'd end up treating him like a doormat, and frankly he just deserves so much better than me after everything he's been through. I wish him every happiness, it just can't be with me." Kurt smirks, "But he's still hot as fuck. I accidentally caused him to have some body issues... So, I've tried to let him know that I do find him attractive without getting his hopes up."

"I think you've succeeded, he broke down and told me about what went on sophomore year. He seems to be under the impression that if he hadn't picked on you, you guys might have had a shot. Which means he believes you about being attracted but him having no chance now." Sebastian explains.

"Well, that's actually a load off. He probably has a few things twisted, but I'd do more damage than good to poke at it."

"Probably." A few seconds of silence pass before Sebastian says, "So, can the awkward-as-shit, 'you're hot but I won't fuck you' conversation please die now? Because seriously, my throat hurts from all the talking."

Kurt smirks, "Well, it's got to be an improvement compared why your throat usually hurts."

Sebastian laughs, "Oh, I think I'm going to like this new, talks-about-sex-Kurt."

He waves a hand at him, "Bah, you just like it when someone can keep up with your barbs and innuendos."

"True. Okay, let's leave this room before our periods synch up." Sebastian gets up and heads for the door.

Kurt smacks him as he goes by. "Gross. Just for that, I'm not helping you torture Finn."

Sebastian pouts, "But but but-! The straight boy! He should be taught a lesson!"

"Oh shut up, we have all summer."

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

To say that Sebastian is a little confused about the way the day has gone, is an understatement. _Seems like all I've done since I first stepped foot in this house is try to figure out what the hell is going on._

He'd woken up this morning feeling sick at the idea of Kurt and the guys coming home. He knew they'd still be pissed at him, and for good reason. He'd gotten up, gotten dressed, and went shopping for groceries before either Burt or Carole had roused.

After hours of baking, he'd left the basket of stuff on the table and gone to hide in Kurt's room, not really wanting to see their faces yet. He'd only really been done for about half an hour when they got back, surprisingly just the two of them.

When Finn came in with Kurt's suitcase and told him Kurt wanted to talk to him in the living room, Sebastian had kind of guessed that Finn was lying and just wanted him out of the room. But honestly, he knew he needed to talk to Kurt and the less witnesses, the better. After their heart-to-heart, where Sebastian had revealed **way** more than he ever meant to, they'd gone downstairs to taunt Finn while he got his ass kicked.

They'd been sitting around and joking for a few hours when Burt and Carole had come home. They'd all gone out to eat at a truly horrible restaurant named Breadstix, then gone to see the Avengers. He'd really liked it, which wasn't actually that surprising with that much eye candy on screen.

Kurt and Sebastian had spent the ride home discussing who would make a better match, Captain America and Iron Man, or Thor and Loki. Kurt eventually won. Finn had backed him up when he really caught on to what they were saying, pointing out that Thor and Loki were brothers, and that was gross.

Now they were settling in for bed and Sebastian, thinking about the movie, snorted loud enough that Kurt turned to look at him. "What?"

"I just realized. You're totally Black Widow."

Kurt glares over at him, "While I appreciate being compared to someone as undeniably hot as Scarlett Johannson, again, I'm not **actually** a girl."

"No, shut up. Hear me out. She's this innocent looking chick, who's stuck in this horrible situation, and she looks like she's about to get her ass stomped. Then, as soon as one of her friends is in trouble, she starts busting balls and kicking ass, then strolls off, shoes in hand, like 'that's just Tuesday night for me'. You've got to admit, except for the chick part..." Sebastian explains, liking the comparison more and more as he goes.

Kurt giggles, "Okay, I get it. Thank you. The only reason I'm agreeing is because she didn't forget her shoes or wreck her outfit. Usually if girls do something like that in a movie they walk out looking like they're fresh from 'Nam."

Sebastian laughs too, "Oh god, that **would** be your main concern. Jesus. Go to sleep, Widow."

"Night, Meerkat."

_Weirdest day_ _**ever** _ _._


	10. Chapter 10

[Kurt]

The next morning, Kurt wakes up before the alarm again. _I knew it was too good to last._ Sighing, he gets up and goes downstairs to make coffee. He checks his facebook as he enjoys his first cup. Since he'd only woken up about half an hour early, he goes back up and barely makes it in time to turn the alarm off before it blares, waking up Finn too. _Idiot. I've told him not to leave the bathroom doors open. If I woke him up before 6am, he'd die._

Kurt sets the cup of coffee he'd brought for Sebastian down on the table beside his bed and debates how to wake him up. Eventually he moves over to the bathroom, shutting the door and then tapping Sebastian on the shoulder. Like last week, he gets no response.

Smirking his most evil smirk, he leans over and licks Sebastian from jawline to temple, à la the Lion King bathing scene. Kurt has barely managed to shuffle backward before Sebastian jolts upright in bed, hair sticking up everywhere.

Kurt is too busy falling on the floor laughing at him to notice that Sebastian is glaring at him and wiping his face. "D-did you just **lick** me?!"

"Oh my god! Your face! And your hair!" Kurt is still unable to collect himself.

"Seriously?! Did you just lick me?!" Sebastian looks grossed out and slightly shocked when Kurt finally manages to look back up at him.

"Sorry! I couldn't resist. After last week I needed one more bit of revenge and you weren't waking up. If it's any consolation, I brought you coffee." He gestures to the cup on the table.

Sebastian picks up the coffee gratefully, still glaring at Kurt, and leans back against the window, mumbling, "Okay, whatever, Simba. Just never 'lion's kiss' me again. So gross."

"Simba? He wasn't the one that did it, but I'll take it, before you get a chance to look up his mom's name. Besides, it's better than Fancy or Princess." Kurt gets up and moves over to his vanity to start his morning moisturizing.

Sebastian looks over at him, "I've actually wanted to ask you about that. How come Dave and Puck don't get punched in the face every time you talk to them?"

Kurt laughs, "Well, with David, it was the lesser of evils. He called me a lot of things when he was bullying me, but Fancy was the one that stuck. Eventually he explained it wasn't meant to be mean, and I guess I get that. In this town, it's hard not to be 'fancier' than most." Kurt picks up another tube and continues,

"With Princess, it's actually a Mario Brothers reference. One day, he came over because he was upset about something but Finn wasn't around. I told him he could come in and wait. We were just sitting there talking, and eventually he spilled. Before I realized what I was doing, I'd hugged him. It just kind of developed into a cuddle session. When he got up to head home, I asked him if he was going to go back to treating me like shit now. He said no, that he couldn't do that anymore. Not with someone that actually helped him when they really didn't have to. He said from then on, he'd protect me."

"Ah, making you Princess Peach." Sebastian actually smiles at this.

Kurt huffs, "I drew the line at Peach, but I let the princess thing go. I knew he didn't mean it as an insult. Besides then he made a joke about how he was Mario to Finn's Luigi and I just couldn't hate it anymore. I still get mad when other people say it, though, so don't get an ideas. He means it protectively. Everyone else just means I should be wearing a tiara and glass slippers. And really, who downgrades from a crown?"

It's only after the words are out that Kurt realizes that Sebastian doesn't actually know about the 'Prom Queen' thing. He looks to Sebastian and notices his raised eyebrow, clearly not missing the comment or moment of panic that he couldn't hide. Kurt drops his head down on his vanity and groans. _Damn it! He's never going to let this go. Why do I even bother to keep things hidden at this point? I should just up-end the chest on my bed and get it all over with. I doubt he'd be shocked by anything anymore._

Sighing, without another word, Kurt just gets up and goes to the closet. He pulls out the memorabilia chest and puts it on the bed. Angling it where Sebastian can't see the combination, he opens it and grabs the prom picture, handing it to Sebastian. Then he sits beside the chest, waiting.

"You were Prom King? I thought your school treated you like shit?" Sebastian looks honestly confused, which makes Kurt feel a little better.

"No. David was Prom **King**."

"But you're dancing with Blaine, and you have a crown-" His eyes widen. "Oh my god! Are you serious?! You were Prom Queen?!" It's clear that Sebastian can't decide if it's okay to laugh or not.

"Yep. Last year. Regrettably, I'd decided to wear a kilt, too. My classmates thought it would be the height of hilarity."

"So, if you went with it, why aren't you dancing with Dave in this picture?"

Kurt sighs, "I freaked out at first. I ran out, crying. But when Blaine asked if I wanted to leave, I just couldn't do it. I couldn't let them win. So I went back. I let them crown me and I played along. But when they told us to dance, I pressured David too much, and he ran off. Can't really blame him. Then Blaine stepped up, and we danced. Fuck em." He shrugs again. _It's still a sore spot, but screw it. It's the past._

Sebastian is obviously impressed. "Wow. That's actually very awesome of you. To be able to just shrug it off when people are that cruel. No wonder I was barely a blip on your radar when we met."

"Oh, you were more than a blip. But yeah, at that point I was firmly in the 'fuck it' stage." Kurt gets up, goes back to his moisturizing. He notices out of the corner of his eye that Sebastian is eying the box on the bed, like he wants to open it but is afraid to ask. "Go ahead, at this point, it's not like there are many secrets left. But you are restricted to one question per item."

Sebastian springs off the bed like an Olympic swimmer off the mark. The prom stuff having been already explained, he just sets them aside. He holds up each item of clothing and Kurt usually gives a short explanation on why he owns it, or why he wore it. The corset almost puts him in the floor because Kurt's only explanation was "I was trying to tell Mercedes I was gay without actually saying 'I'm gay'. It didn't work and she ended up busting my Nav's window out with a rock."

It's pretty clear when he gets to the bottom of the trunk because he doesn't touch the last thing laying there but he does give Kurt a wide-eyed look of surprise. Kurt laughs, "Okay, there are two explanations I could give. One is along the lines of, 'doesn't every gay boy need one?' And the other is more explicit than anyone but Blaine actually knows. Your pick."

Sebastian swallows and glances back down before turning back, "I guess option two, since you sort of already told me option one."

Rolling his eyes Kurt turns back to the mirror so he doesn't have to actually look at him as he speaks, "Well, all of this is probably TMI, but you asked for it. Blaine doesn't like to top. Like, at all. We tried it once, and he said it was okay, but he really liked to bottom. I, on the other hand, really liked bottoming, and would have preferred to switch it up, at least some of the time. That was Blaine's compromise. He got it for me for Christmas. Could you please not look at it too closely? He'll kill me when he knows you've seen it. I'd like to at least be able to tell him it was just a glance."

Sebastian turns to him, "Why would he care if I've seen your dildo? For fuck's sake, you bought **me** one."

Kurt giggles, "That was hilarious. I really hope you kept it, because that thing was actually pretty expensive." He ignores the slight sputtering coming from his bed, "Actually, that's a Clone-A-Willy. He bought a kit and made it himself using a mold thing. It's actually **him**. So yeah, it'd be better if he didn't find out that you'd seen it."

Sebastian laughs, "Oh please. It's not literally him, and it's not like I haven't seen my share of cocks. It's not a bad one though."

Kurt laughs, "Well, on that note, you should get ready for school or you'll be late."

Sebastian glances over and starts a little at the time, "Shit! Gotta do my hair. Rules be damned, I'm doing it in the bathroom to save time."

"Go ahead, I have plenty of time. I'll clean up when you're done, just haul ass." Kurt finishes his face and gets up to put the clothes back in the closet. After hanging everything up, he puts the prom memorabilia back on the bookcase. Even the picture, now that it's not painful to look at. _I should really try to find a picture of David and I though, the traditional picture. Surely_ _ **someone**_ _snapped one?_

Kurt glances around the room, seeing if there's anything obvious that should be packed up for Sebastian to take back to school. Luckily he didn't unpack much since he'd only really been there Sunday. He does grab the laptop and his chargers, shoving them in the duffel and putting the phone on top. Sebastian comes out of the bathroom and notices that everything is ready to go.

He thanks Kurt and while dressing says, "I wanted to ask, the shower gel in the bathroom, is that another one I shouldn't use or...?"

"No, no! I bought that one for you. I figured if Axe really bothered you, and you tend to forget, I'd find something cheap but subtle. And honestly, it seemed nice enough that I could use it in a pinch. Good to have a back up everyone can use."

"Oh, good. I had to use it and was feeling guilty. But I figured it had to be better than using the good stuff again. I could tell by the bottle it wasn't as expensive as yours." Sebastian has just slipped on his blazer, and grabbed his bag. Kurt had been warring with himself, but finally speaks up,

"Um, I know you're in a hurry, but can I ask you something?"

Glancing at the clock, Sebastian says, "Sure, you bought me time packing for me and I can skip the coffee since you brought me one. What's up?"

"Last week... um. What all do you know about Sam's past?"

Not expecting that at all, he says, "Very little? Just that he's living here because his family moved to Kentucky and he wanted to come back to McKinley. And I know they had some money problems but things are going better now, right?"

"Yeah! Yeah, his family is fine. Both his parents got new jobs, they're doing great. It's um... see, when he was living in Kentucky... they were still having trouble. They couldn't find work. So Sam decided to help out. He couldn't find a job for more than minimum wage... so he... stripped. For awhile."

Kurt watches Sebastian's face go pale. "No. You... you can't be serious? And I... Jesus fuck! I didn't know! I swear I didn't know, Kurt!"

"I know! I guessed you didn't know when you said it. I was shocked, and I could tell he heard you, and that it bothered him. I talked to him afterward and made sure he knew that you couldn't have known. He's gotten some shit about it before, but honestly he's not that ashamed of it. He did it for his family. But yeah... the comment was a little below the belt."

"God! Yeah, the comment was bad enough. Then I threw money at you! No wonder they wanted to kick my ass! Jesus." he stops freaking out long enough to notice that Kurt looks shocked and a little sickened, "Oh god, what now?"

"No! It's nothing... I just didn't put that together before. About the money. Jeez. He probably assumed you were implying I was a stripper or something." Kurt sighs, "Well, he couldn't have been too upset, he **was** holding Finn back. Not an easy thing to do."

"Ugh. I really do need to leave or I'll be late. I'll apologize to Sam next weekend. Well, I'll apologize to everyone, even Finn, even though I've seen him. But especially Sam. Jesus." He shakes his head and moves toward the door.

Kurt jolts, "Wait! Let's trade numbers. If you're going to live in my room, I should probably be able to text you."

Sebastian laughs, although it's muted, "Sure, but ya know, a sock on the doorknob does the trick."

Kurt slaps him, then puts in Sebastian's number as he calls it out, walking backward toward the door. "Turn around before you fall down the stairs!"

Kurt gets a yell from near the front door saying, "See ya next weekend, Widow." He waits til Sebastian is outside before he shoots off a text,

_**To Seb: don't beat yourself up about Sam, Timon. He's a big boy, just apologize and you'll be fine.** _

He's grabbing everything and shoving it in his messenger bag when he gets,

_From Seb: ya ya, don't worry. You're hilarious Simba. Now shuddap, I'm driving._

Kurt starts to text him and bitch him out for texting while driving before he realizes how stupid that is. As he hesitates, he hears Sebastian honk his toy car's horn and pull away from the house. _Oh! He was_ _ **leaving**_ _. I don't have to kill him. Thank god. I don't have clothes I'm willing to ruin hiding a body._

Kurt gets up and goes to wake Finn up, _Maybe with coveralls?_

* * *

 

As Noah and Kurt push open the doors of McKinley High, none of them really know what to expect. Anywhere else in the country, winning a national competition is a big deal, no matter what it's for, or who actually does it. When Kurt sees the two smallest hockey players from Friday walk up to them holding slushies, his only thought is, _Here we go again. I hope it's not blueberry._

Instead of being hit in the face with burning cold ice, they are littered with confetti. Kurt can't help but look at it like a baby first discovering his own feet. As they walk down the hall, continuously pelted with new confetti, Kurt half expects Noah, Sam or Blaine to attack him with hugs and/or kisses. The last thing he expects is the puckhead from Friday with a broken nose to leap out of nowhere and hug him. He later hears from Noah that Rick, moving a little slower than usual, paid Finn off for their bet with a scowl on his face. _I guess_ _ **some**_ _people hold a grudge._

When Sugar starts passing around sparkling cider, Kurt is not even a little surprised when Blaine and Noah team up against him, chasing him with bottles, trying to ruin his clothes. He tries to be mad but he can't stop giggling.

After staring at the Nationals trophy inside the case for longer than they'd ever admit, Kurt waits for Finn outside by the Navigator with Sam and Noah. Kurt can't stop bouncing, still charged from a day with not a single person looking at him with hate in their eyes. Noah has an arm around his waist and Sam is laughing as Kurt tells him about Sebastian comparing him to Black Widow.

When Finn comes out, he tells them they've been asked to sing tomorrow night and Kurt starts bouncing again. Seeing this, Finn laughs and hugs him, giving him a set of mini-pom poms. "They fit you better, especially right now. Can you stop bouncing long enough to drive us home? I'll fill you guys in on the way."

* * *

 

Tuesday night finds all the New Directions waiting backstage for Finn and Rachel to finish their speeches. When Finn starts singing 'We Are the Champions', and the music starts, Kurt can't help but be glad he has enough time to breathe before his solo comes up. _The last thing I need is to start crying. I'm in the front row!_

As Kurt sings his lines, Finn runs down and pulls Mr. Shue on stage. Kurt finishes the song with everyone else, arms wrapped around Quinn. Mr. Shue is pulled out of their hug by Quinn to go accept his award. Kurt wraps an arm around Sam and glances at the audience. He has to double take, but just before everyone stands up, Kurt sees Sebastian smiling at him from the back row. When he looks back, a few minutes later, the seat is empty, like most of the rest of them. He almost thinks he imagined it until he walks off stage.

He almost runs into Sebastian, standing at the bottom of the stairs. "Hey! You stuck around! I thought you left. I can't believe you drove all the way here."

Sebastian shrugs, "Yeah, well, I wanted to see you guys perform. It wasn't nationals but you guys were amazing. I wish I'd gone to Chicago."

Kurt laughs, "That would have been ridiculous and not a single member of our club wouldn't have mocked you for it, but thanks for the sentiment."

Before Sebastian can respond, Noah and Sam come out of no where. Noah puts his arm around Kurt, with his hand on his lower back and Sam steps in front of them. Noah snaps out, "What are you doing here, Craigslist?"

Sebastian groans, "God Kurt, did you have to tell them about **that**?"

Kurt is unrepentant. "Hey! It was one of the funniest things I've ever said. I'm keeping it."

Sebastian ignores him and responds to Noah, "I just came to see the performance. And to congratulate everyone on Nationals. From what I just saw, you guys deserved it."

Noah is looking at him warily but says nothing. Kurt had told them all that Sebastian had apologized, but everyone knows Kurt can't carry a grudge.

Sebastian turns to Sam, who is still glaring at him. "I already apologized to Kurt for what I said to him, but I also want to apologize to you. I had no idea and I'm very sorry for the things I said and did, especially if they hurt you. I don't know you very well but you seem like a nice guy and I never would have acted like that if I'd known."

Sam relaxes a little and glances behind him at Puck, who shrugs a little but holds Kurt a little tighter. Kurt cuts in with, "Seriously guys, it's fine. He really didn't mean anything aside from calling me a girl, which we've talked about. He had some shit going on. If I can forgive him, you guys should, too."

Sam shrugs, immediately backing down, "Alright, if you say so, man. If he can compare you to Black Widow, he must understand you well enough to know we aren't the ones to worry about."

Sebastian winces, "Yeah, no. Message received there. I'll not be pissing him off on purpose anymore."

Sam gives Seb a quick fist bump, smacks Kurt on the ass, and walks away to find Mercedes.

Noah finally seems to relax a little, "Fine. If Princess here can move on, so can I. But I'm watching you, asshat. You say or do anything to Kurt and they'll be picking up shards of your beaver-teeth for a month."

Kurt slaps him, "Noah! Be nice! Well, nicer. He really is sorry, and he drove almost two hours to see us sing for three minutes."

Noah mutters, "Us. Right." and gives Kurt a kiss to the temple. "I'm sorry, babe. I'll back off." He means that figuratively, because he makes no move to release Kurt or move away.

Sebastian coughs, "I actually wanted to apologize to Finn too, I never got around to it when I saw him this weekend."

Noah, without looking away from Sebastian, whistles loudly, and calls out, "Yo, Finn!"

A few seconds later, Finn runs up, smiling widely. "Hey! It's the master baker!"

_Jesus. I really do need new friends._

* * *

 

Kurt spends the next three days spending almost every waking moment with Noah Puckerman. During school hours they were often found in the library, Kurt helping him memorize facts for his test on Monday. After school they head to the garage where Kurt quizzes him on the things they'd studied that day. It's slow going, but Kurt doesn't know what else to do. _At least Noah knows that people care, that we're here for him._

Kurt's honestly not sure if this much time has really been helpful, though. _He seems to be stressing himself out more with the extra time._ When Quinn had offered to help him study, Noah had actually snapped at her. He'd said he was already doing all he could and that Kurt was helping him with every free second.

Finally, on Friday, Kurt broke his silence. They're in the library, where they'd been studying, as usual, and the school day is about to end. As they're packing their school bags back up, Noah says, "Since we aren't working at the garage today, are we going to your house? You said your dad is in D.C. so he won't care that Sebastian won't be there until later, right?"

Kurt decides to just be honest. "Actually, I think you're a little burned out, Noah. I know I am. Why don't we take a break tonight? Let's go out. Do something. You should enjoy your weekend. You know most of this stuff already and brains work better with rest."

He looks like he's going to say no so Kurt cuts in, "I promise you, Noah, it will be fine. But you need to relax. You've been working too hard and you can't even take the test if you have a breakdown." Kurt does his best impression of Finn's puppy look.

"Okay, okay. Jeez. Pull it back, dude. Fine, what are we doing?" Noah looks amused, if still a little worried.

"Well, let's head out to the truck and find out what Sam and Finn are doing. We'll go from there." Kurt grabs Noah's hand and pulls him outside.

When they get to the parking lot they find out Finn and Sam both have dates that night, and won't be around until fairly late. Kurt refuses to ask too many questions, sure that at least one of them will be taking advantage of the empty house, and that's just really not what he wants to think of when their girlfriends are Rachel and Mercedes.

As Kurt and Noah climb into the Nav alone, Kurt says "Okay, so that takes them out of the equation. Should I call Seb and find out what he's up to?"

"Sure, babe." Noah had actually been much better about Sebastian, once Kurt had sat him down and made him listen about the whole thing. His response to being told about Sebastian not handling the revelations well had actually been laughter. He'd said, "Oh, I'm sure I understand his problem better than you do. You're so fucking clueless sometimes." Kurt had been confused, but Noah wouldn't explain it.

Kurt pulls out his phone, calling Sebastian.

"Hey, Kurt. What's up?"

"Hey! We were just wondering if you had plans or if you wanted to do something tonight. We're bored and studied out."

"Who's 'we' in this scenario?"

"Noah and me. Finn and Sam have dates."

"Sure, how bout a movie or something? We can just hit the cinema at the mall, get dinner there afterward so no one has to cook."

"Sounds good to me. Movie, Noah?" At his nod, Kurt says, "Alright, where are you?"

"I'm actually in the car already, headed that way. I'm about an hour and half out though."

"K, just meet at the mall then?"

"No problem. Hey, we should invite Dave, he doesn't get to hang out with groups much anymore."

"Ugh. Okay, I'll call him next, since you're already driving."

"What the hell was that 'ugh' about? I thought you liked Dave?"

"I do! It's not Dave specific. It's just... So, walking through the mall will be Noah, Dave, you, and then **me**. I'm going to look like your freaking mascot. Like I don't look enough like a girl, now I'm going to be surrounded by you guys. So yeah. **Ugh**."

"Okay, that's it. I'm done. Give Puck the phone."

"What? I'm not-"

"Now, Simba, let's go."

Kurt huffs, "Here, he wants to talk to you." When he turns to Noah, he's surprised to see him already glaring at him, but he takes the phone.

"What's up?"

"Okay. So Kurt seems to think he looks like a girl. I swear, as much time as he spends in front of the mirror, you'd think he'd realize he's hot as fuck."

"Well, at least we agree about something."

"Granted, his clothes are pretty effeminate. So here's what we're doing. You're going to take him home and strip him-"

"On board so far."

Sebastian laughs, "Pick out some of his clothes. See if you can find some pants that he didn't buy at Sherwin-Williams, find a shirt that is tight but not stupidly so, and for fuck's sake, not girly. Find him a hoodie or something. Then you style his hair. If you can't find something that works, raid Sam's closet, I'm sure he won't mind."

"Okay, so, say I agree to do all this, how the fuck are you going to get **him** to agree?"

"I got this, give him the phone back."

Noah just laughs and passes the phone back, "Tag, you're it."

"Seriously Sebastian what the-"

"You're going to let Puck dress you or I'm going to call Blaine and tell him I've seen his cock."

"What?!"

"You heard me. See ya in a bit. Don't forget to call Dave."

And then he hangs up.

Kurt just blinks. " **What?!** "


	11. Chapter 11

[Sebastian]

When Sebastian pulls up outside the movie entrance to the mall, he sees Dave waiting out front. After he parks, he walks up to Dave, "Hey Bear Cub, how's it going?"

Dave just nods, "Kurt just texted, although I think it was Puck, said they'd be another ten minutes. Something about getting shoes from Puckerman's house?"

Sebastian realizes, "Oh, shit. Yeah, shoes. He'd look ridiculous in his hooker boots with a normal outfit."

Dave just looks confused, "Normal?"

Sebastian laughs, "Oh, you'll see. Should be good." Without another word, Sebastian turns and goes inside, looking at which movies are playing. "God, I hope Kurt doesn't make us watch a chick flick. Think the three of us have any chance of out voting him?"

Dave gives him a pitying look, "Have you met Fancy?"

Sebastian sighs. "Yeah, I didn't think so. Damn." They stand around and bullshit a bit longer, Sebastian noticing the large amounts of kids their age walking around. _Good. Let's hope they're still around after the movie._

Just when he's about to text Kurt to find out where the fuck he is, he hears Dave say, "Goddamn."

Sebastian turns toward the door to see a smug looking Puck walking with an embarrassed and shifty eyed Kurt. Sebastian almost wants to crow in triumph. Kurt is wearing only slightly too-tight jeans, a form fitting grey t-shirt, a large, but not baggy, red hoodie and black converse shoes. His hair is a toned down version of the 'Born This Way' video. He's also now glaring at Sebastian like this is all his fault. Which it is.

Sebastian starts talking before Kurt can say a word, "So, what movie are we seeing?"

Kurt glares but says, "I don't really care, as long as we can go sit in a dark place soon. I look stupid."

They all laugh a little, Noah says, "I told you, babe. You look fine. As in 'fine as hell'. Let it go."

Kurt huffs but stays quiet. Dave speaks up, "How 'bout Battleship? It's pretty much the only thing that's not a chick flick or a kid's movie."

"Sold. I'm easy." Sebastian says, shrugging and digging out his wallet.

"We know." Kurt finally cracks a smile and Sebastian just rolls his eyes. After collecting the money, Sebastian steps away to buy the tickets, leaving Dave and Noah alone with Kurt.

Dave speaks up first, "Okay. How the ever loving shit did they get you to do this?" When Kurt just shakes his head and glares over at Sebastian, Puck says,

"Dude, I was sitting right there. I still don't know how he did it. It took him like two seconds to convince him. Kurt won't tell me what he said." He looks a little put out to be kept out of the loop, actually.

Dave looks impressed. "Well, as long as he continues to use his powers for good instead of evil, I'm all for it."

Kurt looks uncertain before finally asking softly, "So you guys really don't think I look stupid?"

Puck groans and facepalms, Dave just shakes his head. "I swear to God, Fancy. You look hot. Let it go. I have no idea why Sebastian had you dress like this, but it's a nice change. Not that we don't all miss your usual pants."

Puck laughs as Kurt blushes like crazy. "Ooh, that's a fun reaction. Who said what to make him blush like that?" Sebastian comes back and passes out tickets.

Kurt just mutters, "Shut up."

Sebastian laughs. Puck, looking down at his ticket, says, "Okay, we have over 20 minutes to kill. Now what?"

Kurt mumbles, "Can't we just go sit and wait?"

Sebastian sighs. "God, Simba. If it's that big of a deal, we can just go? I thought you wanted to hang out. I thought you didn't like people judging you because of your clothes. But now you're just moping and bitching because your clothes didn't cost more than your car."

Groaning, Kurt says, "Fine! I'll shut up! But I still would rather go sit down, we just got out of school and I want to relax, not deal with stupid people. I can't even shop for clothes because all of you are hopeless."

"Like we'd let you buy something to change into? Yeah right, Princess." Puck smirks.

"The bitch-fest is amusing, but I'm with Kurt, let's just go wait. At least we have plenty of time to get through concessions." Dave walks away without waiting on anyone, Kurt running to catch up.

"You do have a reason for this right?" Puck looks over at Sebastian, who smirks again,

"Trust me."

* * *

After Battleship ended the four guys made their way over to the food court, bitching about it.

"It wasn't **that** bad."

Kurt snorted, "Anyone remember when Dave used to have balls? It's been awhile, but seriously. Didn't he used to be a total jerk?" At Puck and Sebastian's laughs, he turns to Dave. "You're too nice. That movie was total shit."

"Meh. At least things happened. The last movie I saw with that much ocean was 'Open Water'. **That** movie sucked." Dave scowls at the memory. "Two hours I'll never get back."

Sebastian turns to him, "That's all you require in a movie? 'Don't make me resent living for the next two hours'? That's sad as hell."

Puck nods, "That's pretty bad, dude. There were hot people to look at and good graphics, everything else was shitty at best."

Kurt huffs, "We should have just seen Avengers again. Noah still hasn't seen it anyway."

Puck shrugs, "I can wait. I wouldn't have been able to hear it over you assholes anyway."

"Aww! Sorry, Noahie! Didn't mean to detract from your movie-going experience." Sebastian laughs at the death-glare he now receives.

When it looks like Puck is about to say something, Kurt cuts him off. "Don't! Jesus fuck. Don't get him started, Noah. I don't want to end up on the news." When he doesn't say anything but continues to glare, Kurt groans. "Okay, ya know what? You guys stay here. Me and David are gonna go get food."

As Kurt walks away, Dave in tow, Puck's anger drains. If anyone knows not to piss Kurt off, it's Noah Puckerman. Puck and Sebastian just shake their heads and follow.

15 minutes later, Kurt is surprisingly done eating first. He'd wolfed down his burger in record time and now sat leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed, scowling down at the table while the others finish eating. Dave finally speaks up after finishing his own meal. "Okay, what's wrong?"

Kurt scoffs, "Nothing." It becomes clear he's still pissed about his clothes because now he's picking at the sleeve of the hoodie and glaring at them in turn.

When Sebastian finishes his chicken sandwich, he turns to Kurt. "Okay! Now for results!" He stands up, pulling Kurt with him by the elbow. Kurt just looks confused, but goes with it, because seriously? At this point? Fuck it.

Puck and Dave glance at each other before following.

Sebastian only goes about two tables away. Sitting at the table is a group of three girls only a year or two younger than them. Sebastian had noticed them shortly after leaving the theater. The girls had actually followed them. They'd sat giggling and drinking smoothies, pretending not to eavesdrop on the group of boys.

Knowing that the girls had been listening to them for a good 20 minutes, he figured they'd be the best ones to ask.

"Hello, ladies. Do you mind if I ask you a question?" Puck, Dave, and Kurt just look confused.

The girls giggle and the one in the middle says, "Sure, hun. Fire away."

Sebastian smiles, then asks, "Of the four of us guys, which, if any, would you guess is gay?"

Dave looks shocked and embarrassed, Kurt looks horrified, and Puck just laughs. Sebastian waits patiently. The girls on the sides look just as surprised, slowly looking each of them up and down. The middle girl, after a long moment of just staring at Seb, finally answers, barely glancing at them.

"Butch and Mohawk." At Kurt's sputtering, the girl smiles, "Did I get it right?"

Sebastian laughs, and turns to the other two. "What about you guys?" One girl guesses Sebastian and Puck, the other says none of them. Sebastian turns to the first girl and says, "Okay, you had your answers right away, can I ask why you chose them?"

The girl laughs, "My brother is gay, so I guess I just watch guys a bit closer or know what to look for or something. Butch keeps checking guys out when they walk by and Mohawk kept going to touch 'Lil Bit, then stopped himself, like he suddenly remembered he wasn't allowed to."

Puck frowns, "So, why wouldn't you just assume we had dated in the past or something?"

"You guys don't act like exes. You seem like you're just really into him but aren't allowed to touch him. Plus, he doesn't seem to like any of you enough to date, he's been bitching the whole time."

Sebastian laughs, "Okay! Thank you for your time!" When they go to walk away, the girl calls out,

"Wait! Which one of us were right?"

Sebastian smirks, "Actually, all and none of you. Butch, 'Lil Bit, and I are queer as three dollar bills and Mohawk has been trying to get into 'Lil Bit's pants for years, although he insists that he's straight."

"Hey! You can be straight and have an exception, right babe?" Puck finally can't contain himself, grabbing Kurt around the waist and pulling him in, which earns him a smack.

At the girls' confused faces, Sebastian says, "Sorry about that. 'Lil Bit thinks he looks too gay, so we dressed him in boy clothes and brought him out to prove a point. Which you've just done beautifully, so thank you."

One girl mumbles, "No problem." and the other just nods. The girl in the middle smirks though.

"If you really wanted to make it up to us, you guys could always make out. That'd be hot as hell." Her friends look shocked, but noticeably don't disagree.

"Well, shit. You heard the woman, Simba, pucker up." Sebastian turns to smirk at Kurt, who is glaring at him, but he's suddenly interrupted by Puck's face. Startled to suddenly be kissing Puck in the middle of the food court at the mall, Sebastian freezes up for a second before kissing back. The kiss only lasts maybe ten seconds, and when they pull away, Dave is laughing and Kurt looks amused.

Sebastian looks at Puck and huffs. "Dammit Puck! That was my one chance to kiss him and you ruined it!"

Puck just tightens his grip on Kurt, "Stay the fuck away from my princess, Meerkat." Then he turns to Kurt, "By the way, I'm totally not gay. He's hot and that was an awesome kiss, but it did nothing. Wanna see if you can do better?" Kurt just smacks him again, laughing.

Sebastian laughs, shaking his head and turns back to the girls, all of which have suddenly frozen. "Uh oh. I think we broke them."

Dave waves a hand in front of them. Nothing. Sebastian shifts away, looking around then says, "We should go. Pleasure meeting you ladies!"

Then they run away.

* * *

That night, when they get home, it's just after midnight. They'd spent all night hanging out with Dave, ending with just parking outside Dave's house and sitting in the back of his truck. The later it got, the colder they all got. It was actually much too cold for this time of year. All any of them were wearing were light jackets and hoodies. Eventually they sat in the bed of the truck, Noah wrapped around Kurt and Sebastian leaning close to Dave, talking about the passed few years of their lives and their vague plans for the future.

The only one that knew for sure what he'd be doing in the next year was Dave. Even Sebastian confessed he was worried his dad would get transferred and he'd have to leave Dalton in his senior year. He really didn't want to start over that close to graduation.

After Puck admits that his entire future rests on a stupid test, they all drop the topic. Secretly they all think Puck will be fine, but saying so would set him off, so they just smile at him and move on. Kurt never mentions that if he doesn't get into NYADA, he won't be much better off than Puck. Yeah, he's graduating, but he also might be stuck in Lima. That thought terrifies him.

Kurt tells Dave that since his birthday is two days after graduation, the glee club is throwing a combo party next Saturday, and they're having a mini-party at his house on Sunday, and he's coming to both. Not invited. Coming. Because as Kurt told him, he needed as many non-crazies around as possible. When it gets too cold to sit there, they finally break it up, and go home.

He informs Sebastian that he'll also be going, which Seb smirks at, but doesn't deny. When they get inside they find all the lights out and notice that Finn and Sam are already asleep. Sebastian and Puck agree to just change and lay down, hoping to warm up, while Kurt goes to take a shower, because he's already sneezing and the last thing they need is Kurt with the sniffles.

Left alone, Sebastian and Puck both climb into their beds, still a little chilly, but warming up. Sebastian asks if they can just turn the heat on, but Puck said Burt and Carole had blown out the pilot light just a few days ago. They thought they wouldn't need it. And honestly, if they hadn't sat outside, like idiots, they wouldn't. A few minutes into his shower, they hear Kurt cursing from the bathroom and glance at each other warily. He comes out with wet hair, and says, "The water is stone cold."

Seb just raises his eyebrows but Puck jumps up and goes to check. When he comes back, he's glaring. "How the hell did they manage to run through all of the hot water? It was just the two of them! And it's a Friday! Why not just wait til-" he cuts off when Kurt sneezes again.

Sebastian thinks fast, getting up to grab his warmest sweater that he brought and pulling it over Kurt's head. He then pushes him and Puck back toward the bed and goes over to the vanity, checking the basket sitting on the floor under it. He grabs a hair dryer and spends 20 minutes drying Kurt's hair, then using it to heat up his hands and feet. Eventually he gives up and just climbs into bed behind him, Puck on the other side.

Trying to keep his hands to himself, he turns over, pushing his warm back against Kurt's freezing one. After the longest half an hour of Sebastian's life, Kurt stops shivering and manages to fall asleep. It's warm and comfortable under the blanket and Sebastian catches himself trying to nod off. Eventually, Puck asks, quietly, "Are you staying? He wouldn't mind, ya know. If he did, he wouldn't have let you climb in."

Sebastian considers it for a few minutes before saying, "It would be a really bad idea. And I'm trying to only act on good ones." He turns over and smiles a little at Puck, over Kurt's back. He gets up, immediately tucking the blanket down around Kurt. He looks down at him and watches him breathe for a minute before snapping out of it. Refusing to look at Puck, he goes back to his own bed. He's almost relaxed enough to sleep before he asks, "So, I take it the bathroom wars are on for tomorrow?"

Puck's response is instant. "Oh, hell yes."

* * *

When Sebastian woke up it was barely daylight. The sun wasn't even up yet. As he crept toward the bathroom, he glanced at the bigger bed. All he saw was a giant lump and he heard Puck snoring quietly. Trying to get a glimpse of Kurt distracted Sebastian until his nose was almost pressed to the bathroom door. Trying not to wake anyone up, he eased the door open quietly, going to step inside. Until he noticed the light was on.

After blinking away his light sensitivity, he finally manages to look into the room. He lets out a short scream, stepping back out and closing the door. But he can't unsee the image of Kurt Hummel, laying with his head leaned back against the shower/tub wall, surrounded by bubbles- _Because of course he takes bubble baths. What teenage boy_ _ **doesn't**_ _._

Sebastian scowls at the sarcastic thought, but he's thankful that something stopped him from reliving the memory. Eventually realizing that he does still have to pee, he darts downstairs. _God, I hope I didn't wake up Puck. Him finding out would just really start this day off perfectly._

When he comes out of the half bath, Sebastian decides to just stay downstairs. _I can't really handle being up there while he's..._

Shaking his head again, Sebastian goes into the kitchen and starts the coffee. By the time Kurt comes down, Sebastian is on his second cup and eating a bowl of cereal. When he sees that Kurt is wearing his sweater that Sebastian shoved over his head the night before, Seb almost swallows his tongue. But when Kurt just goes about getting a bowl himself, and not speaking, Sebastian is slightly relieved. After about ten minutes have gone by since Kurt came into the kitchen and neither of them have said a word, he finally manages to look up.

Kurt is pale, paler than normal, and is barely moving, making every effort to not draw attention to himself. Sebastian huffs, "Okay, so are we just ignoring it, or what? It shouldn't be that big of a-"

Kurt cuts him off, sounding surprisingly upset, "Don't say it's not that big of a deal. It is to me."

Sebastian just blinks. "Kurt... seriously, it's not. All guys jack off. Okay, so it's a little awkward that I've now seen you do it, but-"

Kurt cuts him off again, making a strangled noise, "Could we just not talk about it? It's bad enough without discussing it. So, could we just... not?"

Sebastian watches Kurt for a minute before putting his spoon down and turning toward him. "Okay, what's the real problem? A month ago I'd totally believe that you were this much of a prude but seriously? The shit I've seen and heard lately? I'm not buying it. For fuck's sake, I've seen your dildo. Clearly I know you masturbate. What's up?"

Kurt shifts around in his seat for a few minutes, eventually he forces out, "The only person that's ever... seen me... is Blaine. I don't really know how to handle this."

Sebastian thinks for a second before turning back to his cereal, which has been soggy for awhile now, "Well, it's kind of new for me too. Despite what you may think, I don't make a habit of intruding on people's sex lives. If I'm not invited in, I stay out. Okay. That sounded horrible. Forget I just said that. Anyway, it's not like you really need to worry about me seeing anything. There were enough bubbles to cover you." _No there weren't. I'm a_ _ **liar**_ _. But he needs to calm down and honestly, I kind of wish I could banish the image. It's not doing my peace of mind any good at all._

Kurt flushes, "Oh. Well... good. Okay. Yeah... I didn't really remember the bubbles. I thought you got an eye full. Still, even if all you saw was my 'O face', I guess that's embarrassing enough. Let's just please stop talking."

Sebastian pounces on that idea, "Deal. God, let's just shut up before Puck hears us. He'll freaking kill me."

Kurt starts giggling at that. "Oh, he really would."

Sebastian turns to Kurt, "So... how serious is he in his attempts to get in your pants anyway? And honestly, if you guys are this close, why not just date?"

Kurt sighs, "I can't date Noah. He doesn't want a relationship, not with me. He'd actually be an amazing boyfriend. He's loving, sweet, protective, not to mention hot as hell. But, for one, I don't think he actually has any idea what it means to be with another guy. He really is straight."

Sebastian gives him a disbelieving look and Kurt quickly amends, "Okay, so he's like a one on the Kinsey Scale. He is attracted to me, and he flirts a lot, but I really don't think he could handle full out sex. Or if he did, it would only be because it was me and we've gotten very comfortable with each other in the passed few months."

"Oh, trust me, I've noticed" Sebastian laughs.

Kurt rolls his eyes, "But yeah, like he proved yesterday, he isn't at all attracted to other guys. So, maybe it's true? Maybe everyone has that one exception?"

Sebastian tries to get back on topic, "So, if you are his exception, why **not** date? You guys clearly love each other."

Kurt shifts a little, "I don't think we love each other the way lovers should. I mean, it's hard to imagine loving someone more than I do him. He's my closest friend, and since Blaine and I broke up, he's been there for me in ways I couldn't have dreamed of a year ago... but... it's just not that **romantic** , I don't think. I don't really let myself sit back and analyze."

"Okay, so back when you were a Cheerio and he tried to get you out of your uniform, you turned him down. Why? You didn't have any other options, because Dave is a wimp."

Laughing a little at Dave's expense, Kurt says, "Well, in hindsight, I really should have. There's actually very little that I regret about my life. And I hate to say this, and if you tell anyone, you'll look back on the basket with fond memories, but... I wish I'd had my first time with Noah back then."

Sebastian can't keep the shock off his face. "You didn't want your first time to be with Blaine?"

Kurt looks back to the stairs to make sure no one else was coming in, before saying, "At the time, yes, that's what I wanted. Looking back? I wish I'd known what the fuck I was doing." Kurt sighs. "Our first time was... awkward. We were too wrapped up in the emotions to really pay attention to the mechanics, and neither of us had more than basic knowledge. Noah had already done anal by that point, although, obviously, with a woman."

Sebastian really can't form words anymore. "So... you wish you'd slept with him then, but you can't do it now?"

"We weren't that close back then. If I had known that in a couple years, we'd be this close, and sleeping with him wouldn't ruin that chance? I'd have been on my knees by that afternoon." Sebastian coughs, laughing a little in surprise. "Since we didn't know each other that well, we could have casually hooked up and moved on, I think. I'd have gotten the experience, and gotten laid, and been okay if things got awkward afterward. As long as, eventually, Noah had shown up, and we'd had that talk, and ended up the way we are now, I wouldn't have minded that being part of our past. It's just... now... one of us would get too attached, and we just don't want the same things right now. Maybe not ever."

Sebastian nods, "So, which one do you think would get too attached?"

Kurt thinks about it a bit, eventually saying, "Both of us, in different ways. I'm gay, I always have been, so I grew up thinking that I'd have a long relationship. That I'd be in love for a very long time, even insanely, happily in love, for **years** before I'd get married and have kids. It's just not as easy for us, so we tend not to jump into it as quickly. Plus there's no shotgun weddings for us. I want other things... not to say I don't want a husband and kids some day, I definitely do. I just want to be happy in my career, whatever it turns out to be, by then."

He continues, "I want kids when I turn about 30, which is normal everywhere but the midwest. Here, people are having kids and getting married straight out of high school, which is fine! It's just not what I want. I'm pretty sure that's what Noah wants though. He wants a good job, so he can take care of his family, and a family to take care of. And god. He deserves it. He should get that cookie cutter life if that's what he wants. I just can't give him that. I'm a selfish person. I don't want to live in Ohio. I don't want to sacrifice my dreams. I don't want to settle down with the perfect man, and kids, as much as I'd love them."

Sebastian nods, "I get it. You can't sleep together because you'd end up dating and you can't date because you'd end up married."

Kurt laughs, "Jeez. That would have been so much easier to say! Yes. That." Kurt gets up to put their dishes in the sink, then turns back to Sebastian, "My only real concern now is... how do I leave him? How do I go to New York and move on with my life without him there? And not just him. Everyone. How do I leave my dad? And Carole?" Kurt sighs again.

Sebastian gets up, coming over to Kurt and putting an arm around his shoulder, "You just do. You have to. Like you said, you can't stay here, Kurt. As much as you want to be here for everyone, and to have them with you, you would wither here."

Kurt leans on his shoulder, "I know."

* * *

When Kurt and Sebastian hear someone running down the stairs, they jolt and move away from each other. It's only afterward that Sebastian realizes how stupid that is. _What the hell? We weren't doing anything wrong... and I'm supposed to be using Kurt to piss off Finn. Why would I move away when someone comes in?_

Puck comes charging in, grabs something out of the fridge, and runs back out without a word. A few minutes later, he comes back with his hair wet, looking much too pleased and much too coherent. Sebastian is worried. _Oh God. Did I wake him up before? Has he been up this whole time? What was he doing until now?_

It's only when Kurt sees the smirk Puck is wearing that he groans, "Noah! It wasn't that big of a deal! Please tell me you didn't-"

"Don't worry, Princess. I started off small. I purged it and re-hid the supplies. I took Seb's stuff out too, just in case. He hasn't formally picked a side yet, but depending on who goes to pee first, that may not matter." Puck shrugs and glances at Sebastian. "But, if you want a shower today, I'd go do it now, dude. They get pissed easy."

Sebastian is only more confused by Kurt's continued scowl. Ignoring them completely, Puck grabs a box of cereal and goes about making his breakfast. It's only like 7am, so he has a few hours before Sam and Finn wake up, but Seb decides to just go with it and heads upstairs. As he's about to touch the stair rail, Puck says, "Oh! Don't go near their door." and goes back to his cereal.

Now rather wary of the bathroom, Seb continues upstairs at a much slower pace.

* * *

At almost noon, Sebastian, Kurt, and Puck are all sitting around the living room talking about video games. Kurt is leaning against Puck's side and Sebastian is sprawled out in the arm chair. Burt had called about 20 minutes ago to make sure everyone was okay and the house was still standing. When Kurt had told him the wars were started again, Seb could hear the mechanic's laughs from across the room.

Just as they're wondering how long it will take, they suddenly hear an air horn go off upstairs, shortly followed by a loud thud. While Puck laughs, Seb and Kurt wait to see who the victim was. They don't have to wait long. Finn comes charging down the stairs with a large smear of butter on his back. He has a furious scowl on his face, "What the hell guys?!"

Puck snaps out, "No! That's our question. What the hell possessed you guys to use all the hot water on a Friday night?!"

Finn replies, "We didn't! We only took two showers, even if Sam took one, it shouldn't have-"

"Wait! If Sam isn't part of that 'we', who is?" Kurt looks outraged now.

Finn looks sheepish. "Rachel. She was over last night-"

"Ahh! No! No sharing! We don't need to know about why the she-hobbit needed a shower!" Seb cuts in, really wanting to stop that explanation before it starts.

Puck however says, "Oh, no. I really want to know. What exactly could you guys have possibly done that made it necessary for her to shower **here** , instead of her own house, where **she has her own bathroom**."

Kurt looks betrayed at this news, "She what?! What the hell Finn?! She has her own bathroom and you let her shower here?!"

Finn throws his hands up, "Okay! I was trying to be subtle about it, but fine. We showered together!"

Sebastian wants to ask where they keep the bleach. Kurt looks like he might throw up. Puck looks mildly impressed followed shorty by royally pissed off. "So getting laid was more important than Kurt not getting sick?!"

Finn has the grace to look shocked, "What? Why would Kurt get sick?"

"Because it was cold last night, dude! We didn't know it was supposed to get that low, so we were sitting outside talking for a few hours. He wouldn't tell us he was freezing and by the time any of us noticed how bad it was, he was already sneezing. Then we get home and the water is like ice, which he didn't know until he was already in the shower." Puck wraps his arm tighter around Kurt.

Finn stammers, "B-but we didn't stay in it **that** long! There should have been enough for another shower! It may not have been real hot toward the end... but at least enough to warm up!"

Kurt speaks up, "No, actually it was barely lukewarm when I started it, I thought it would heat up, so I got in. Within minutes it was all but dropping ice cubes on my head. At least I got to wash my hair first..."

Sebastian cuts in, "The point is, it took like half an hour to warm him up. It was Friday! I thought everyone agreed to wait until Saturday mornings?"

Finn stutters, "W-well..." but Kurt cuts him off,

"No! Really! We get why you did it! Stop explaining, the gay ones don't want to hear about it!"

Just then they hear stomping on the stairs, "Okay, seriously with all the noise, guys? First there's horn or something, now you guys won't stop yelling! I didn't get home until like 11! Why can't you let me sleep?"

Puck turns to Sam, "Did you take a shower last night?"

"Wha- yeah. It was kind of late, and everyone was asleep, so I just decided to take one so I wouldn't have to worry about it in the morning. I kind of regret it, it was fairly cold when I was done." Sam actually glares at Kurt for this, like it's his fault, so Kurt quietly says,

"We didn't get home until after midnight."

Sebastian laughs at how quickly Sam understands the meaning behind those words, his eyes widening to saucers. "N-no! That's not my fault! I didn't know you weren't back yet!"

Finn flails his arms, "You should have checked dude! It's a rule! Now the wars are back on! And you know Puck doesn't fight fair!"

Sam just blinks at Finn, "Dude, what's all over your shirt...?"


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to point out that most of this story could be seen as slight Puckurt, and this chapter is one of the most worrying for someone that's not into that. This is as far as they ever go. They shut it down, for reasons already mentioned. But they are very close. Obviously, lol.  
> Also, this is one of the chapters that I took great liberties with the timeline on. If you watch the clothes and stuff in the Goodbye episode, it makes no sense. So I just did what I wanted, bc I'm crazy like that. =D

[Kurt]

Kurt has never been more worried about Noah Puckerman than he is right now. It's Sunday night, and Noah finally fell asleep about ten minutes ago. The only consolation was that Noah had wanted to go to sleep early. _Tomorrow night is the last chance to study... He knows all this stuff, I know he does. He's just psyching himself out._

With a long-suffering sigh, Kurt sits at his vanity to do his nighttime routine. While he lines up his pots and tubes, Kurt thinks back on the longest weekend in recent history. The bathroom wars are off to a rousing start. After the air horn and buttered floor, it had quickly gone down hill from there. The pranks were getting more and more childish by the moment. He keeps expecting fake poop and saran wrap. Instead, what followed was a deluge of frozen toothbrushes, toilet paper being replaced with duck tape, clear nail polish covered soap bars, vanilla cake frosting slathered onto the toilet seat at night, and last, a bouillon cube hidden in the shower head.

It took Noah half an hour of scrubbing, even with Kurt's products, to stop smelling like chicken. _I'm actually a little worried about what he'll do in return. Finn_ _ **really**_ _messed up that time. The idea was genius, but I don't think I'd have taken credit for it. I'd have taken that shit to my grave._

After the war was declared, the rules changed. Only two rules remained. First, Kurt still gets one of the showers, but they aren't as careful about it. Now there are marks made on the bathroom mirror with a dry-erase marker to tell how many showers have been had that night. It had only taken one instance of Kurt washing all of Finn and Sam's underwear and socks with a cheap red sweater, bought only for this purpose, for them to realize pissing Kurt off was a serious no-no. _Little did they know, that was a warning shot. I'm glad I didn't need to actually aim and fire._

The second rule is that it must be contained to their shared bathroom, the rest of the house was safe. No sneaking into each others' rooms. No one really disputed that, they all had things they wanted kept safe. It's why Noah had purged the bathroom of all of their stuff, to be hidden in their room. Kurt is actually really concerned with what Sebastian will do when he finally decides to take an active roll. _He has more resources and he's downright devious... I'm glad he's on my side._

He's just finishing up when Sebastian pokes his head inside. "Hey, you guys are done, right?"

Kurt glances at him but has to do a double take, "Yeah, we're done. Why is your hair wet? Oh god! You didn't use the master bath did you?!" Burt and Carole weren't actually back yet, but would be in the next few hours, and even Kurt couldn't figure out how they always knew if someone had been in there.

"No, I didn't even think of it, wish I had now. I used the kitchen sink to wash my hair enough that I wouldn't ruin the pillowcase. Ugh. Sam stole the last fucking shower. Now I have to get up even earlier."

Kurt smiles a little, "I hate to say it, but better you than Noah. He really needs the sleep. And a tranquilizer. Seriously, the man is giving me worry lines. It's like he's lost all confidence in himself."

"Well, it is a lot of pressure. I'm sure he'll be fine though. At least he has you." When he realizes how that sounds he adds, "Helping him, has you helping him."

Kurt giggles, "It's fine, Bas. Honestly, sometimes even I forget we aren't actually dating."

Sebastian turns to Kurt, "Okay, I didn't say anything about 'Seb', because my name is kind of a mouthful, but now it's 'Bas'?"

Kurt cocks his head to the side, "What? No? Sorry. I tried out 'Seb' for a bit, but it reminds me of 'sob' which makes me think if crying, which depresses me. So I've moved on to 'Bas'."

Sebastian just shrugs, "Whatever you say, Peach." At Kurt's glare, Sebastian just smirks, "You call me Bas, I get to call you Peach. Seems fair to me."

Kurt continues glaring. When Sebastian doesn't cave, he sighs, "Fine, I'll try to contain myself, if I slip you can retaliate. But if you call me that in front of Noah, I swear to god..."

"Aww! It's like we're secret friends now! Should we make up a handshake?" Sebastian just looks too amused at himself.

"Go to bed, Smythe."

* * *

The next morning, when Kurt opens the bathroom door, he can't help but groan aloud. Sebastian, barely awake enough to grunt out, "Whu?" stumbles up behind him. Then he starts swearing.

"Goddammit! How am I supposed to shower before school?!"

Kurt just sighs, he'd known he should have tied Noah to a chair when he'd said he needed to "run home for some stuff for school" last night. Obviously, he'd lied. Instead, he'd run around town, buying every old newspaper he could find. He'd crumpled them into giant balls and fill the entire room with them. Granted, it was a small room... but the paper was almost up to Kurt's chest. He turns and glares at the sleeping boy. _How the hell did he manage this? He obviously woke up in the middle of the night to do it, but how did he not wake us up?_

Sebastian finally turns back around and starts gathering up his stuff, luckily mostly already packed. When Kurt notices, he says, "So, since you can't shower you're just going to school in shorts and a muscle shirt?"

Sebastian doesn't even pause, just continues to gather his stuff, slipping on shoes. Good thing he'd woken up extra early to shower. "Actually, I'm going back to my house. We have six bathrooms. If I didn't live so far away, I'd have done it before. But it's on the way to Dalton, so it's perfect."

Kurt stares at him, drooling a bit. _Six bathrooms?_ He snaps out of it and asks, "Can I come, too? My job starts today, so it'd be nice to be better than half-ass groomed. And honestly, I don't want to be around for the yelling this will induce."

Sebastian shrugs, "Sure, grab your shit though, we gotta get moving."

Kurt immediately darts for his closet, grabbing his emergency skin care kit and the clothes he'd already set out for that day and for work that afternoon. That way if he didn't make it back home in time to change, he could just Clark-Kent-it in the bathroom at the Lima Bean. He leaves a huge note on the vanity mirror telling Noah that they were all on their own getting to school. Slipping on his school bag and boots, he turns to Sebastian. "Okay! Let's go!"

* * *

When Kurt finally has his hair done to his satisfaction, he walks back down the hall into Sebastian's room. The room is huge, almost twice as big as his own. It's done in dark stained wood and hunter green. He'd expected something modern and fairly douchey. Instead it all looks very classic, and Kurt is begrudgingly impressed. He can still hear the shower going, so he sits in the desk chair and goes through his school bag, making sure he didn't forget anything. The water had just turned off when the cell on the desk starts ringing.

Kurt calls out, "You know your phone is ringing right?"

Sebastian calls out, "Yeah! It's just Jeff, you can answer it."

Shrugging, Kurt picks up the phone. He's mildly surprised to see the name is 'Draco', not 'Jeff', but he answers anyway, "Hello?"

"Uh... hey? Did Seb have some fun tonight or did I somehow get the wrong number?"

Kurt laughs, "Nope, it's Kurt, Bas is just getting out of the shower."

After a beat of silence, Jeff says, "Oh! Okay... I get it... Anyway, hi Kurt! How have you been?"

"Good! We graduate this weekend, so I'm really excited. And I start working at a coffee shop here in town today, so I'll be able to save up some cash. How bout you? I don't hear much about you guys anymore."

Jeff huffs, "Well, who's fault is that? You should call me more often so we can hang out! Especially since you're leaving soon! I have to see you again before you go!"

"Actually, we're having a graduation party this weekend, on Saturday, you guys should come! You and Nick and anyone else you think would be interested. You can just get the details from Bas, I'm making him go too."

"Awesome! Yeah, I'll totally be there! Nick too, and I'll round up as many guys as I can! Aw crap! Sorry, I gotta go, but tell Seb I called! I got worried when he didn't text me. Later!

"Bye Jeff!", he's staring at the phone in his hand, wondering about the name 'Draco' when he hears the bathroom door open. "Hey, what's up with Jeff's name on here? I almost didn't answer it."

"It's a Harry Potter reference. He actually changed it himself. It used to be 'Bubbles' but he didn't like Powerpuff Girls, apparently. He said he was mysterious and sexy, like Malfoy, and changed it." Kurt looks up in time to see him shrug, but he really wishes he hadn't. Kurt has trouble grasping at thoughts at that moment, because Sebastian has come out of the bathroom, hair still wet, wearing only a towel around his waist. The shrug caused it to slip an extra centimeter down.

Kurt blushes and looks back down at the phone, trying to hide his reaction. "S-so, is everyone in here under a nickname?"

Sebastian smirks, seeing the blush that is slowly making it's way down Kurt's neck. "Come on, you were on the football team, I'm sure you've seen guys in towels before."

Kurt flushes darker, "Actually, I tended to avoid looking around at all costs so that I made it out of the locker room alive. You didn't answer my question."

Chuckling, Sebastian moves behind his closet door where Kurt can't see him and says, "Yep. Although Jeff is the only one to pick his. It's just easier to go with it, or he'd nag me to death."

Kurt shifts, "Can I look through them? I want to see if I can guess mine."

Sebastian shrugs, fairly confident he won't be able to, "Sure. But no cheating and you only get three guesses."

"Sold!" Kurt slides the phone open and scrolls through the contacts. He's a little surprised at the names, getting some movie and tv references but not all of them. Some seem to just be comments about that person's physical appearance. _That doesn't bode well for me._ Sure enough, none of them are flattering in reference to himself. He's actually pleased when he figures it out. _It could be worse._

"Ugh. Prom Queen? Really? That's not even-"

Sebastian cuts him off, calling out, "Nope. Two more guesses."

Kurt just stares at the back of the door. _Shit._ He glances back through the list, hoping he missed something. Aticus, Batman, Bear Cub, Darth Vader, Dat Ass, Dollface, Draco, Forrest, Holy Hips, Lady, Lips, Madea, Prom Queen, Shyness, Turkish, Willy. _Oh god, that's not-_ " **Please** tell me that 'Willy' isn't Blaine..."

He can **hear** the smirk when Sebastian calls back, "I won't tell if you won't. It doesn't matter, he won't see it. Anyway, two more shots, hurry up, I gotta go." Sebastian walks back out, dressed now except for shoes, which he sits down to put on.

"Um... Shyness?"

"Engh! Wrong, one more guess."

Kurt really doesn't know. The only possible options are Dollface and Lady, neither of which is good news. Finally he decides that Dollface would be weird, so... "Lady?"

Sebastian sighs, glaring at Kurt lightly, and reaches for the phone. "Three strikes, Peach. Oooh! I should change it to Peach!"

"Do it and die, Smythe."

Sebastian pouts at him, "Party pooper. Okay! I gotta get going if I'm going to make it in time for class."

As they walk back down stairs and out the front door, Kurt looks around again, "Your house is seriously amazing. No wonder you threw a fit about coming to stay with us."

Sebastian glances at him, "It's not that bad, actually. Well, until the war started. If this happens again, there's a spare key hidden by the back door in a fake rock, the code to the alarm is 11490. Just make sure you lock everything back up."

Kurt is shocked by the offer, "Um, thanks! That's great! Now I won't have to freak out if they do something overly stupid."

"No problem. Anyway, I gotta go or I really will be late. See ya Friday at graduation!"

Kurt gets into the Navigator and watches Sebastian drive away. It's only as he hears a chime that he realizes he left his phone in the car. Reaching down for it he sees four missed texts from Finn. _Ugh. I'm so over this, and we're only on day three._

Without responding to Finn, Kurt pulls away and head back into Lima. _I need coffee. In a vat._

* * *

When Kurt had listened to Mr. Shue sing, he couldn't believe the year was almost over. By the end of the week, he'll graduate high school. He'll find out if he's going to NYADA. He'll have started his first job that wasn't family owned. It's a strange idea.

As he's walking down the halls, thinking about how different his life has become, Kurt gets a text from his dad. Burt still isn't used to texting, so he hardly ever does it. It reads a bit like a telegram, but he heads toward the auditorium anyway.

Hearing Burt talk about his childhood, and how he handled it, Kurt can't help but be thankful all over again that his dad accepted him for exactly who he is. When Burt stands up on the stage, talking about what started it all, Kurt gets a sense of dread. As Tina and Brit walk onto the stage and his dad pulls out a silver sequenced glove, Kurt understands that it wasn't just dread. It was a ball of dread, laughter, love, disbelief, and about ten other feels that he has no desire to place. When they start dancing, Kurt sits in frozen shock.

No less than three times, Kurt almost gets up to hide behind his seat, to avoid the scene taking place in front of him. Burt Hummel standing up on a stage smacking his own ass is what finally breaks Kurt's silence. Laughing as quietly as he can, Kurt marvels at his dad and how much love and understanding can be held inside one man. He really is the perfect dad.

It's as he's walking into class, telling him about it, that Blaine pushes to have the talk he'd been putting off since they started talking again. Blaine asks,

"What are we going to be in a year from now? Five years? I'm worried that because we aren't dating anymore, we're not going to stay close. If I don't end up in New York next year, what will happen to us?"

Kurt turns to Blaine, "Do you want to know how I picture the end of my life? I want to be surrounded by my kids, and grandkids, and telling them about my first love. I want to gush about what a great guy he was. How perfect we were together. And how lucky I was that we were able to stay friends after we broke up. I want them to be horrified that I dated Uncle Blaine, and be staring at you, wide eyed, while our husbands are laughing about it."

"So... we're going to be alright?" Blaine seems hopeful, but still unsure.

"Yes. We're going to be alright. I told you, I'm never saying goodbye to you. We'll figure out the friend thing, we'll Skype, we'll worry the hell out of our future boyfriends. It'll be fun!" Kurt smiles.

Later, as he stands in front of the New Directions, looking at each of them in turn, singing 'I'll Remember', Kurt starts crying, thinking about leaving all of these people behind.

* * *

That night, all he feels like doing is collapsing. _Who knew being a barista took this much work?_ Thankfully, the newspaper was gone from the bathroom, but Kurt was still wary of going in there. He'd almost rather drive to Sebastian's than risk it, but that would be too much effort. Anything besides laying in bed calling out questions to Noah is too much effort. Burt had understood and finally lifted the chaperone condition so that they could study. It was their last night. Noah had to get this today or it was all for naught. And honestly, if he didn't pass, the teacher might actually shank them. They'd annoyed her a lot, asking for extensions, with everything going on.

When Noah finally snaps, says, "Don't worry, you still get bro points for trying to help a loser learn something." and gets up to leave, Kurt can't take it anymore.

He steps in front of Noah and puts a hand on his chest to stop him, "I'm not here for 'bro points'. I'm here because I love you."

Noah stops. He so seldom hears those words that he can't just shrug them off. "Why? I was such an ass for most of high school. Especially to you."

Kurt scoffs, pushing Noah down to sit on the bed, and sitting beside him. "Do you really think there's any amount of slushies or dumpster tosses that could cancel out the friendship and support you've given me since then? Outside of my dad, Carole, and Finn, you mean the most to me out of everyone in my life. I have no regrets about our relationship. Any of it, even the bullying."

Before Noah can respond, Kurt blushes, remembering a conversation he'd had with Sebastian. "Okay, that's not totally true. I kind of... wish I'd given you my virginity. Ya know, back when you'd asked for it."

Noah just looks at him in wide-eyed disbelief for long enough that Kurt regrets telling him. Eventually Noah manages, "W-what?"

Kurt panics, "Oh god! I didn't mean to freak you out! It was just something that Sebastian and I were talking about last weekend. About how I wish I'd had experience before I tried to have sex with Blaine and how I really wished that I could have done that with you, while I'd had the chance. Ya know, before we got so close and it would have made us awkward. Looking back on it now, I really wish I'd gone for it. You know we can't date, or really be together, but that doesn't change the fact that I've thought about it more with you than with anyone else, besides Blaine. You've been there for me in ways I can't even tell you."

Noah finally snaps out of it and leans forward to hug Kurt, "If you need me, you know where to find me. Right here in Lima, repeating my senior year, forever."

Kurt scoffs and pulls back, "Okay, maybe I take it back. I would have never given my virginity to this guy. The Noah I love is a badass. You know the stuff on that test. I know you do. You just need to get your confidence back."

"How am I supposed to do that?"

Kurt smiles, says, "Like this." and leans forward.

Noah says, "No, wait-" but is promptly cut off by Kurt, who pushes Noah back on the bed, leaning over him.

"No. I don't want to wait. I've been waiting since we won that game sophomore year. You made the touchdown, all I did was kick a ball. You shouldn't have been the one standing alone. I've wanted to do this since then." Without waiting for a response, Kurt leans down and kisses him. While he waits on Noah to react, he presses himself closer. Kurt wraps his arms around Noah's neck, running his fingers through the back of his mohawk.

Eventually Noah moans a little and grabs Kurt, pulling him in and deepening the kiss. As Kurt's stomach clenches, he thinks to himself, _Oh, this was a bad idea. It's been too long since I've had sex... We can't do this again or things will get_ _ **very**_ _complicated._

As if sensing his thoughts, and knowing it's his only chance, Noah pulls Kurt on top of him and Kurt finds himself straddling his lap. As Kurt let's Noah lead the kiss, following his tongue when he pulls it back into his own mouth, Kurt can't help but let out a groan of his own. It's not until Kurt realizes how hard he is that he knows he has to back off.

When Kurt finally sits up, he's surprised at just how much they are both gasping. _Jesus fuck. How long have we been kissing?_ "As fun as that would be, there's no going back if that happens. We need to stop."

Noah nods, "I agree... in theory. Can I have the first shower?"

Kurt laughs and climbs off his lap, "Sure. Make sure to check the shower head. No amount of soup ingredients is getting me in that bathroom with you right now."

_Sorry Blaine, but I definitely wish I'd caved back then. Jesus._

* * *

As the juniors get up to sing, Kurt looks over to Noah, having noticed earlier that he was getting nervous now that the test was coming up. While they are still getting set up, Kurt sneaks over to the chair beside Noah and grabs his hand, not even looking in his direction. _Glare all you want, you're not alone and I won't let you sulk._

As he watches Artie dedicate the song to Finn, Kurt squeezes Noah's hand. He isn't sure which way Noah will take the words. He may be slightly resentful, because he made sacrifices to his rep too, especially lately. Or he might just feel the same way that Artie does. If it weren't for Finn, Noah might still be that meathead jock that threw Kurt into dumpsters.

At that thought, Kurt leans over the gap and rests his head against Noah's shoulder. He still doesn't look at Noah, sure that he's getting a scowl for ruining his pout. He just continues listening and smiling at Blaine and Sam, who keep eying them. When they finish, Kurt gets up to hug Blaine. When he looks back at Noah, he's still sulking, but it looks more worried than upset, and Kurt counts it as a win.

* * *

After the bell rings, Kurt stands with Noah in the choir room. Knowing his test starts any minute, Kurt leans in and gives him a hug, saying "You've got this." Kurt gives him a kiss on the cheek and leaves the room.

As Kurt leans against the lockers talking to Finn, he sees Noah strutting down the hallway with a smug look on his face. _God, I've missed the old, badass Puck._

Before he can get worked up about the results, Rachel runs up to them and tells them about their letters. They agree to open them all in the choir room when they come. He's been so wrapped up in Noah's problem that he hasn't really had time to think about his own... _What if I don't get in?_

A few hours later, almost the entire glee club is pacing outside the classroom. Kurt has all but bitten his nails off, which he hates. Eventually, the teacher comes out and when Noah holds the papers up in the air, Kurt can't stop himself from hugging the person closest to him, which is the very startled teacher. When Kurt steps back, he sees that Noah is surrounded by all of their friends, getting hugs. Before he can stop himself, he charges down the hallway at Noah, throwing his arms around his neck. When Noah goes to pick him up, instead of his usual shriek and slap, Kurt just wraps his legs around his waist, squeezing tighter. _He did it! He's graduating!_

When Kurt finally puts his feet back on the ground, he hears Finn's faint, "Why do they just keep getting worse?"

* * *

The change that comes over Noah is startling. Now that he knows he's graduating, he's all smiles and can't seem to stop hugging people.

While Finn sings the opening to 'You Get What You Give', Noah can't seem to sit still, dancing around in the background. When it's his turn to sing, Kurt can't help but watch him with a smile. _It's so good to see him joking around again. Hey! Maybe I can get him to back off on the wars now..._

As they circle around the juniors, Kurt following Noah, he couldn't be happier than he is right then. It's bittersweet a few seconds later when he looks to Blaine and realizes it's a fleeting moment, and soon he'll be separated from all of these wonder people. _Ugh. I'm so over this week. It shouldn't be this sad to escape the hell that is high school._

* * *

Just before the end of the day, Kurt is called into Sue's office. Trying to remember if he did anything the crazy woman could be mad about doesn't turn up anything, so he's really just confused. As he waits outside, he sees Quinn come out.

"Hey. You can go on in. She's waiting on you." When Quinn goes to walk past him, he gives her a quick hug. He may not like the way she's treated the boys closest to him, but she's still sort of his friend. And she's crying.

When he steps away, she gives him a small smile and walks off. Kurt takes a deep breath and knocks on Coach Sue's door before entering.

When he walks in, she directs him to a chair and says, "I just wanted to talk to you one more time before you go off and do whatever it is that you people do."

Kurt knows better than to ask, so he just says, "Okay, well, I'm here. What's up?"

She turns to face him and says, "Ya know, I just told Q that she reminds me of a slightly less evil version of me. I'm sure everyone is aware that I play favorites, I hardly try to hide it. She's always been special to me because I watched her go through that mess with the baby and I admired her for her poise."

Kurt is failing to see the point, but nods slightly. She had handled it way better than most would have. _Well, until after she gave Beth away, but, meh. Semantics._

"I'm also sure that people have noticed I have a soft spot for you, Porcelain. You have the honor of reminding me of the sweetest, bravest person that I've ever met. My sister was, for the longest time, the most important person in my life. I love her and miss her every day. I see the same strength and bravery in you. I wish I'd been able to do more about the bullying when it was going on. I wish I'd known what was going on with Karofsky, so I could help him. I hope for my own baby to have half as much courage as you've shown in the past four years at this school." Sue gets up, and walks over to a cabinet in the corner, opening it to reveal stacks of red boxes with small labels. She bends down to the bottom, where there is a small stack of slightly larger boxes and grabs the one on top.

Walking over to Kurt and leaning against the desk, she passes it to him. "Quinn actually gave me a good idea. I let her keep her old uniform, knowing no one else could ever fill her shoes. Well, the same is true of you. So I want you to keep this. I know I haven't always been the nicest person, but I really do want you to know that not everyone thinks you have to fit into a box, kiddo. Sometimes it's okay to stand out. Sometimes it's the standing out that makes us so special."

Kurt is speechless. He'd actually treasured his time on the Cheerios. It was the closest he'd ever come to being popular and normal, until this year after nationals. He hugs the box, wiping his eyes. "I can't think of a way I'd rather be described than to remind you of your sister, I know what she meant to you. Thank you so much." Kurt let's out a half-sob, half-laugh. "I think I might actually miss you, Coach."

Sue also let's out a laugh, "Oh, I don't believe you either, Porcelain." but she stands up when he does, and accepts the hug he gives her. "It's been a strange week, kiddo."

"It really, **really** has."

* * *

When Friday finally comes, Kurt can't stop moving and pacing. When his name is finally called, he can't picture a better way to cross the stage and take his diploma than with Blaine handing him a handkerchief, Noah singing, Finn playing drums, and his family cheering. Burt is by far the loudest, but Sam and Sebastian are almost like back-up singers to the mechanic. After Kurt curtsies, he steps over between David and Noah, waiting for Finn to get his diploma and join them. By the time they throw their caps, Kurt is bouncing with excitement.

Later, as they stand in the choir room, waiting to open their letters, Kurt feels vaguely like he's going to throw up. When he hears that he didn't get in, but Rachel-the-stalker-Berry did, Kurt almost does. Luckily, he manages to nod and smile and make his excuses, but he really can't face her right now. So he runs. He'd rocked his audition and she'd choked at hers. _Why am I the one that's screwed?_

When Finn tells him that she's talking about putting off New York to be with him for another year, he kind of wants to throw his hatred of violence out the window and slap her. Luckily he doesn't need to. Say what you want about Finn Hudson, but he's a good man. Even though he'll break her heart, and his own, he'll convince her to go on without him. To not put her life on hold for him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's starting to earn its rating. I'm sorry, I'm so crap at writing smut. This IS my first story. D=

[Sebastian]

On Friday, Sebastian leaves school first thing in the morning. It's technically still the school year, but it's so late in the year, no one even pretends to care that he's skipping. It's been a very long week. Between the last warbler practice, and lacrosse, he's been running all week and is just thankful that it's almost over. His last day of school is Wednesday, and honestly, he probably won't even go to classes, he'll just spend that day packing up his car of the things he hasn't managed to filter back to the Hudmel house over the passed few weeks.

_Maybe I could get Kurt to drive up, we could do it in one trip with his big ass truck... if we're early enough he won't have work yet, and it'd be great to escape before Jeff can ambush me again._

Upon reaching school on Monday, Jeff had started his assault. He seems to be under the impression that Sebastian had slept with Kurt and wants details. No amount of him explaining that he was **just** showering, and Kurt was waiting in his room, seemed to satisfy the blonde. _Well, explaining the bathroom wars to outsiders would be impossible. Fuck it, let him assume all he wants. Who cares?_

Kurt also must have referred to him as 'Bas', because Jeff had been calling him by the name all week, just to annoy him.

When Seb gets to McKinley, he meets up with Burt, Carole, and Sam and goes to sit with the family, feeling a little out of place. When he sees Puck start playing his guitar, and Finn start singing, he's surprised to find he actually prefers this informal ceremony to the overly formal, stuffy graduations he's been to before. _God, usually they take hours. You have to pack snacks and shit, like it was boot camp._

He finds himself swaying back and forth with Sam, singing along softly, waiting for people he recognizes to be called up. As Dave walks across the stage, they're the loudest cheering for him, although he can see Paul is here too, he's just quiet. When it's Kurt's turn, they all yell loudly, Burt screaming, "That's my boy!", and Sebastian can't contain his smile. _Hope my dad is that proud of me next year._

When it's Finn's turn, he notices that Carole looks like she's going to burst into tears any minute. He quickly hands her his handkerchief, just nodding when she thanks him. He resolutely doesn't let his mind wander to his own mother.

As the caps rain down on the stage, Sebastian realizes that this is the perfect time to take a long shower, the house being empty. He excuses himself from the Hudmels, telling them he'll see them at home.

* * *

 

The first thing he does is inspect the room for booby traps. It's actually clear. _I guess no one wanted to fuck with Kurt on graduation day. Glad to know there are_ _ **some**_ _limits._

As Sebastian finishes up his shower, he leans back and just enjoys the hot water. It's Friday, and it's barely afternoon, he can stay in as long as he likes. It's as he tips his head back onto the wall that his mind flashes back to last Saturday. When he'd walked in to find Kurt laying back in this same tub, his hands under the water, one hand massaging his balls while the other slowly moves over his cock. Sebastian almost chokes on the water now, breathing in suddenly at the mental image. _Dammit! I'm never going to be able to forget that, am I?_

Before he makes a conscious decision to do it, Sebastian finds his hand drifting down to his rapidly filling erection. He closes his eyes and remembers the brief flash he'd caught of Kurt, knees spread and eyes closed, hand moving slowly but a little harsher than he'd have guessed. Sebastian tries to imagine the sounds he'd have been making, only slightly regretful that he hadn't managed to hear any of them. _God, that's what I need._ _ **That**_ _voice making_ _ **those**_ _sounds in my head every time I talk to him._

As Sebastian moves his hand up and down his length, twisting slightly at the end, he pictures Kurt speeding up a little. Imagines his whimpers getting higher pitched, his hips thrusting up into his own hand. It's several minutes later, when Sebastian thinks about Kurt's other hand slipping down to push at his entrance that Sebastian comes suddenly, groaning out loud. _**Jesus**_ _. That was quick. The lack of privacy is killing me. Between sharing a bathroom with 50 guys at Dalton and four guys here, it must have been longer than I thought. I_ _ **really**_ _need to get laid._

After Sebastian has washed off again, blushing slightly at the thought of Kurt using this shower in the next few hours, he steps out of the bathroom, relieved that no one else is back yet. _That was probably a horrible idea._

Sighing, Sebastian moves to put on track pants and a black t shirt. Afterward he settles down to play Final Fantasy VIII. _It's almost like Timber is my punishment._ He stops to shake his head, _**Ugh**_ _. Punishment?! I'm a teenage boy! It's not like they don't do it. Clearly._ _ **Jesus**_ _. I'll never get it out of my head now._

As he leans back on the bed, watching Squall be dragged onto the dance floor, he sighs again, _I've got to get this Kurt thing out of my system._

* * *

 

A few hours later, Sebastian is making his way across Galbadia when he hears the door slam closed and the sound of thundering feet on stairs. He looks up when Sam runs in,

"Hey! Just a heads up, Kurt and Finn found out they didn't get into their New York schools and are upset about it, so we're going out for dinner and a movie instead of games tonight. But don't mention this to them, we're pretending it isn't happening. They graduated, it should be a happy day!"

Without another word, or waiting for a response, Sam runs off, going through the bathroom into his and Finn's room. Sebastian just stares at the spot where Sam used to be. _He didn't get in? What? That didn't actually occur to me. I mean, sure, it was possible, I guess... but... really?_

He manages to shake off his thoughts just in time, he saves the game and turns off the console just as Kurt comes in. Sebastian smiles widely, trying to not show on his face that he's heard about NYADA. "Hey! How does it feel to escape the oppressors?"

With a faint lip twitch, Kurt says, "Feels amazing, it's been such a long four years." They slip into slightly awkward silence until they hear the front door again, followed by Puck coming in a few seconds later.

"Sup, guys? I heard we're going out?" Puck flops onto Kurt's bed, looking tired.

"Shouldn't you be with your mom?" Kurt shifts on his feet, like he's afraid Puck will go, 'Oh yeah!' and run away.

"Na, I went home to drop off the cap and gown, kissed Sarah and let her congratulate me, then told Ma I was headed over here."

"And she didn't mind?" Sebastian is a little pissed off. _Is Finn the only person I know with a mom that's worth a damn that's still alive?_

"Well, she looked like she wanted to stop me, but honestly? I couldn't care less. Where was she during my games and the competitions? She came today, so she's not a total waste of emotion, but really? Fuck it. I'd rather be here." Puck leans on his elbows and looks at them. "Mr. H said it's cool, so you're stuck with me."

Kurt smiles a little wider than before and goes to sit down on the bed, burrowing his head into Puck's chest, who just looks down at him, confused. Sebastian waves his arms to get Puck's attention and shakes his head no. _God, don't ask... it doesn't look like he will make it through an explanation._

He seems to get it because Puck just wraps him in a hug and says, "Damn, Princess. Didn't think you'd miss me that much. I was only gone an hour or two."

Kurt laughs and gets up, appearing to pull himself together a bit. "Yeah right, who would miss you? Let's go see if they're ready to go, I'm starving."

* * *

 

As the night goes on, Sebastian tries not to notice when Kurt gets a little too quiet, or stares at his plate a little too long. Luckily, there are six of them, so even without Kurt's chatter, there aren't any silences. Between Sam and Puck, there's plenty of noise. At first Sebastian thinks they've really forgotten, but he catches both of them glancing to Kurt and Finn periodically.

They go out to eat at Applebee's, then they go see Men in Black 3. It's not as good as the first one, but sequels never are. By the time the movie ends, Sebastian is almost sitting on his hands to keep from touching Kurt. Whenever he thinks no one is looking, Kurt sinks into a sad, far away look, as if picturing his whole life being lived here in Lima, Ohio. _That's not happening. He can't seriously think that his family would even let him **try** to stay here?_

Sebastian knows better. They're all giving him space, to figure out his next move, but Seb figures they'll give him maybe the summer before Burt is packing him off and buying him a plane ticket.

As they leave the theater, Sebastian puts his hand on the small of Kurt's back and leans down to whisper, "Are you okay?"

Kurt's back stiffens, like he's been caught at something. "Why wouldn't I be? I'm fine."

Sebastian just murmurs, "Okay, Peach, whatever you say." He ignores Kurt's indignant squawk and pushes Kurt forward, going to join up with everyone else. As they all pile into the Navigator, Sebastian wonders what the hell Kurt is going to do with this monster when he moves to New York. _Even if he decided to keep a car there, surely he wouldn't pick this thing, it's huge! Although it is really fucking helpful when there's more than four or five people in a group... maybe I can get them to sell it to me when he goes?_

As Sebastian settles into the third row, he can't help but resent Kurt and Puck. _Seriously, I'm taller, why am I in the back? At least I have the whole row, but still._

Sebastian is sitting behind Puck, and when Kurt leans over and puts his head on Puck's shoulder, Sebastian almost growls. Barely managing to check himself, he thinks, _What the hell was that?! Stop acting like a jealous boyfriend! It's not like they're doing anything new. God, I really need to get laid. And stop thinking about Kurt. If I don't get over this soon I'm going to have to make Père come back. I can't keep thinking about him this way without making an ass of myself. If they find out that I'm thinking about Kurt like this, I'll either get my ass kicked or worse. They'll be awkward and Kurt will try to sit me down and give me the friend-zone talk, and I just can't deal with that right now._

Sebastian is so wrapped in his thoughts that he's honestly confused when the car stops. He's surprised but grateful to find out they are actually already home. As he climbs out of the back, Sebastian keeps an eye on a sleepy Kurt as Puck guides him back into the house. It's not very late, but considering graduation today and the party tomorrow, everyone decides to go to bed early. Sebastian crawls into bed while Kurt goes to take a quick shower, luckily still clear of tampering.

He's been laying in silence for about 20 minutes when he hears the bathroom door open behind him. Pretending to be asleep seems easiest, so he just lays still and waits for them to settle down. He'd forgotten that Kurt does his skin stuff at night, at the vanity at the foot of his bed. He's all but holding his breath but it doesn't seem to matter.

He hears Kurt stage whisper to Puck, "He fell asleep already? That was quick."

Puck sounds half asleep himself, "No complaints, that just means we can sleep early too. Fuck this whole week, dude."

A light laugh, "Hey, at least it's over. We graduated. Now we can move on with our lives... well those of us that have somewhere to move on to. Ugh. I was so freakin cocky. So sure that I wouldn't need back-up schools... now here I am. And here I'll stay."

"Yep. That was pretty stupid. I mean, I'm not going anywhere, but really, who expected me to go to college anyway? What the hell would I even do?"

Kurt sighs, "You'll get out of here, Noah, if that's what you want. If nothing else you have a brilliant career ahead of you in porn."

Puck laughs, "Well, sure, that **is** the dream." A few seconds of silence. "So... you've had all day. That's about all the moping time I'm gonna give ya. What are you gonna do?"

A deep breath. "For now? I'm gonna stay right here. For at least the summer. The Lima Bean pays as much as coffee shops in New York and at least here I don't have rent. I'm going to save up, and go to New York in September. I should be able to find something once the 'summer job' sect have bailed. Then, I'll have a few months to settle before I start the auditions over again. Not just for NYADA. This time I'm applying for NYU, Tisch, Parsons, anything I can think of. I'm going to make it. Hell or high water."

"You'll do fine, babe." After a few minutes of quiet breathing, Puck says, "Enough! You're smooth as a baby's butt, get your ass in bed. I'm tired."

Kurt huffs, "Fine. I'll just finish in the morning." Sebastian hears Kurt get up and turn out the lights, crawling in next to Puck. Kurt shuffles around, then sounding anxious and slightly muffled, he says, "Do you regret Monday night?"

_Whoa! Wait a minute... what happened Monday night?_

"No way, Princess. I'll admit you almost gave me a heart attack, but it was definitely the good kind." Sebastian can hear the smile in Puck's voice. "I had no idea you were so... aggressive. No wonder Blaine misses sex so much."

A smack. "Shut up, Noah. I swear to god if you start swapping stories with Blaine, you'll be back on the couch downstairs. … Don't pout at me! There are just somethings you don't ask exes."

Puck chuckles, "Fine, fine. I'll be good. … Do you think anyone could tell?"

"I doubt it. I don't really feel any different, so I don't know what they would have picked up on."

"Yeah. Well, I get hard around you a little more often now, but that's only because I know what I'm missing." Sebastian is having so many conflicting emotions that he really doesn't know what to do or how to handle it. _Did they really sleep together? Are they dating now? I thought Kurt didn't want to risk falling too far? Or will that change now that he isn't going to New York for_ _ **months**_ _?_

Even though Sebastian didn't hear anything, Puck suddenly yelps, "Ahhh! Sorry! Sorry! I'll stop. Still, that was a good day. You even let me have the first shower. First time that's ever happened."

Kurt snorts, "Yeah, well, you needed it more than I did. Can you imagine Finn's face if he had seen you like that?"

"Oh, gross, dude. Don't talk about things like that and Finn at the same time."

Kurt giggles, "Okay, we really should go to sleep. The party is tomorrow and we have to go, be all smiles about Rachel and NYADA, and pretend she isn't about to get her heart broken."

"Yeah, but you know Finn's right. She can't stay here any more than you can." Puck sounds like it kills him to say it.

"I know. That won't make lying to her any easier."

Puck sighs, "Yeah... you know I would trick you with a ticket too, right?"

"I know, Noah. I love you, too." After this, it's thankfully quiet. Sebastian lays in his bed, feeling like shit. _So, Finn is going to trick her into going to New York, and oh yeah, apparently Kurt and Puck are sleeping together now._ _ **Fuck**_ _. At least they aren't doing it with me here. Oh god. What am I going to do when school lets out? I guess I can always tell Père to either send me a ticket or get his ass home._

Trying not to think about what's coming, Sebastian buries his head in the pillow and tries to sleep.

* * *

 

[Kurt]

When Kurt wakes up the next morning the first thing he notices is that Sebastian is already gone. It's only 8am, so he knows everyone else is still asleep, but the bathroom light isn't on, and Sebastian's bed is empty. The second thing he notices is that he's being poked in the lower back.

Kurt can't contain his giggles, the slight shaking making Noah grunt behind him, "It's not funny, stop laughin."

Kurt turns to look behind him, "Oh my god, Noah! If you're awake, get that off me."

He just grunts again and pulls Kurt closer, "'M not awake. You just woke me up. 'S not my fault."

Kurt just laughs and slaps at his arm until Noah releases him. Kurt hops up and away from the bed. "Oh no you don't, we agreed. We really can't afford to take this where we can't get back from. I'm going to go downstairs and make breakfast, you can either go back to sleep or deal with your little problem." Kurt takes a quick second to flatten his hair and then heads out the door, calling back, "If you make a mess, clean it up!"

As he closes the door he can hear Noah swearing. When Kurt comes into the kitchen, Sebastian has his head down on the kitchen table, scrolling idly through facebook on his phone. "Morning."

"Good morning. Any requests for breakfast this morning?" Kurt bounces a little as he fixes his cup of coffee.

Sebastian eyes him warily, "You're bouncy today."

"Woke up in a good mood." Kurt shrugs, smiling to himself as he imagines Noah glaring at him when he comes in later. "So, breakfast?"

Sebastian shrugs, "I'm not sure how much of what I eat you know how to make, or that the others would eat. Your crepes are awesome by the way. I was still in douche mode and didn't tell you that before."

"Aww! Well, thank you! As for things we eat around here, um... Finn's favorite is biscuits and gravy and I think he could use some pampering today, but I can make you something else if you'd rather?" Kurt turns to him while sipping his coffee.

"Actually I haven't tried that yet. I've avoided it, seems weird to me. But I've had your cooking enough to trust you. If I don't like it, there's always cereal." Sebastian gets up to make another cup of coffee.

"True. Okay, biscuits and gravy it is." As he's kneading dough, Noah stalks past him to get to the laundry room with his arms full of sheets. Kurt almost falls down laughing. As it is, he's grabbing the counter and bent double.

Seeing Sebastian staring at him in confusion, Kurt says, "Don't ask. Oh my god..."

When he comes back in, Kurt is already mixing the gravy up in a bowl. Noah steps up behind Kurt and wraps his arms around him, leaning in to growl into his ear, "You're such a cocktease, Princess. You'll pay for that." Then he kisses Kurt behind the ear and goes to get a cup of coffee, joining Sebastian at the table.

* * *

 

After everyone wakes up and eats, Noah and Sebastian do the dishes. When Carole darts back upstairs, Burt tells the boys that they're getting ready to leave for D.C., correctly assuming they'd forgotten. Shortly after they leave, Kurt comes down, dressed for work and tells Noah that if he's ready he can drop him off at the garage.

As Kurt pulls away from the house, he asks, "So, how's it going at work? You haven't told me about any problems or anything."

Noah shrugs, "It's actually been a lot easier than I thought it would be. You should come by and check the paperwork after your shift though, just to make sure. Burt hasn't checked it in awhile."

"No problem, but I'm sure it's fine. No issues with customers or tricky cars?"

"Nope. I was a little worried that the other guys wouldn't like listening to a kid, but actually I don't have to direct them much. They know what they're doing. It's kind of awesome that I get paid so much more to just watch them do shit themselves. It's like babysitting teenagers that have no behavior problems." Noah grins.

Kurt shifts a little in his seat, "So no regrets that I kind of roped you into this?"

"Nope, none at all. I really like it. Actually, I've been thinking about opening up my own place one day. It's gotta be better than a pool cleaning business, right?"

"Well, there's less Milfs involved. Or at least, less half naked ones." Kurt frowns at that thought. _Gross._

Noah laughs at the look on his face, which turns into a pout at his laughter. "You brought it up, babe. Don't blame me."

As they pull up outside the garage, Kurt says, "Yeah, yeah. Well, have fun. I'll come by at around 4:30, after my shift. Try to have everything set up where I can just look through it, I have to get home to get ready."

Noah says, "No problem." and leans over to kiss Kurt on the cheek before climbing out of the truck. With a wave, he runs inside.

Kurt heaves a heavy sigh. _God, I miss sex. And honestly, I can't really use_ _ **that**_ _anymore... it feels weird now that we've broken up. But what do I do with it? Throw it away? Give it back to him? Ugh._

When he pulls up outside the Lima Bean, he sits quietly for a minute, considering. Finally he picks up his phone,

_**To Blaine: Ok, awkward question. What do I do with your 'willy' now that we're broken up? I'm assuming it was a pain in the ass to make, so I don't want to like... throw it away, but I can't really use it anymore because I'm sure it will either make me sad or guilty.** _

He only waits a few seconds, probably just long enough for Blaine to stop laughing uproariously, then he gets a text back,

_From Blaine: OMG I'm so glad I was in my room! I almost died! Jesus. ok... um... I don't know? It would be weird if I took it back, it's not like I can use it on myself, that would be even more weird. And I can't give it to future boyfriends bc that's just all kinds of wrong. So I guess if it bothers you, just throw it away?_

_**To Blaine: O god, how? I live in a house with 4 teenage boys! What if they find it?! Or worse! My dad! O god!** _

_From Blaine: Lmao ok, valid points. I guess you could give it to me and I could throw it away? My parents would never notice. I'm pretty sure they don't know where the trashcan is, and the maid will not care at all. Bring it to the party tonight and I'll meet you outside, I can just hide it in my car, no biggie._

_**To Blaine: You're the best ex-bf ever! That would be awesome. Honestly, not sure if it's TMI but it kind of sucks that it's... what it is. I'm living with Noah Puckerman and Sebastian Smythe in my room. Sexually frustrated is a gross understatement.** _

_From Blaine: Oh, I bet. You poor, poor baby. 'aww! I live with 2 hot guys that I get to see half naked. Boo!' lol shut up Kurt._

_**To Blaine: You could have just said 'rich ppl problems'. But seriously, I woke up with Noah poking me today. Then I got to go downstairs, and Seb was half asleep on my kitchen table not wearing a shirt. It's just so fucking unfair. And blue balls inducing.** _

_From Blaine: Lol ouch, ok, I see your point, but really tho? Rich ppl problems._

_**To Blaine: LOL I'll hush, I actually have to work now anyway. I'll see you at the party, I'll text you when we leave. Wait outside and I'll tell them you have a bow tie emergency or something.** _

_From Blaine: K! have fun at work! I'm going shopping!_

_**To Blaine: Hatechu.** _

* * *

 

Later that night, Kurt is sitting at his vanity, doing his hair, when Sebastian comes in, ready to go.

"So, I know I've made jokes about it, but are you really okay being the designated driver?"

Kurt laughs, "Oh, yes. Trust me, it's fine. I still manage to have fun watching everyone else. I have no desire to let my guard down around a room full of known kiss-rapists. Not to mention the Bambi incident." At Sebastian's raised eyebrow, Kurt explains, "My sophomore year, I got really drunk and went to school. I threw up on Miss Pillsbury's shoes. She's OCD. It wasn't pretty. She has these big doe eyes and I called her Bambi..."

Sebastian hides his laugh with a cough, "Oh. Yeah, that would put a damper on things."

"Yeah, a bit. Anyway, apparently Blaine is also going to be sober, so at least I'll have someone to help take pictures. He's letting the Dalton guys crash at his place so he made them bring a van or something. Most people will stay at Rachel's though, her dads aren't there, but they're used to this by now." Kurt gets up, grabbing the small bag that he'd already loaded up with things he might need, _or need to dispose of_. Noticing it was almost 8, Kurt sails past Sebastian, coming out into the hallway, yelling, "Okay! The Hummel express is leaving. All those who don't want to walk should be out in the car in five minutes."

Sebastian follows him out, so he gets passenger seat. As they wait Kurt asks, "So, who all is coming from Dalton? I didn't get specifics."

"Apparently Jeff got five other guys. Nick, Thad, Trent, John, and Steven." Sebastian seems unconcerned, if annoyed.

"What? Don't want your underlings to find out you can't hold your liquor?" When he just scowls at him, Kurt smiles, "I actually don't really know that many of them. I don't think Thad liked me, and I've never even heard of Steven."

Sebastian shrugs, "I think he's new this year. I don't know, or care. Has it been five minutes yet?"

Kurt honks the horn in warning and starts up the Navigator. Sam, Noah, and Finn all rush out, Finn with a backpack on. "I'm a staying at Rachel's, she can just drive me home tomorrow. Might as well spend as much time with her as I can, while I can, right?"

Sam pats him on the back, turning to Kurt, "It's your job to get me out of there tonight, dude. Mercedes is staying, and if I'm drunk, I can't be trusted, so you have to make sure to drag me home tonight."

Kurt giggles, "Oh, I think I remember your lack of honor when inebriated. Don't worry, I'll get Blaine to help me drag you out if I have to. Maybe David if he's not falling over himself. Speaking of, we're headed there next."

Kurt pulls away from the curb, hoping he doesn't end the night trying to get four drunken idiots into his truck.

* * *

 

As soon as he pulls up outside the Berrys' house, he spots Blaine playing with his phone by a mini-van. He gets out of the car slowly, Finn and Sam going straight inside. He's a little dismayed at David, Noah and Sebastian all standing outside the Nav, waiting on him, eying Blaine. _Damn._

When he climbs out, wearing the bag, they all turn to him. "Um... I need to talk to Blaine about something, you guys go on ahead."

Though obviously confused, they eventually shrug and head off, Noah showing the way. Kurt feels vaguely guilty about not going in with David and Sebastian, since they've never been here, but he's got to get rid of this thing.

Blaine waits until the door closes behind him until he says anything, "Hey! That was awkward. Do they think I'm going to jump you or something?"

"God, who knows what the hell they're thinking. Let's just do this so I can get in there and save whoever Sebastian is insulting right now." They walk over to the van, Blaine pulling out his schoolbag.

"Actually, I decided since I was shopping today anyway, and you said you needed one, that I'd get you this. Hopefully it's still less awkward than it being **mine**. I know you won't be able to make it to Columbus any time soon, so..." When Blaine takes out a still packaged, brand new dildo about the same size as the old one, Kurt almost kisses him. _Except, ya know, that'd be a terrible idea._

Instead he throws his arms around him, "You really are the best ex-boyfriend ever! Oh my god. Okay, I have to hide this before someone wonders where we are. Here's the old one." Kurt passes him the 'willy' and puts the new one in his bag, walking back over to his car. After they've both safely hidden their bags and locked their vehicles, they walk into the house, arms linked.

* * *

 

As the night progresses, Kurt finds himself more and more confused, and wishing he could actually drink. All night long, he's been getting weird looks from Sebastian, like Kurt's a puzzle that he can't figure out. Kurt had spent the first hour or so sitting beside Noah on the couch, talking to David and Blaine. When he'd got up to get a drink though, Sebastian stole his seat, leaning heavily on David. When he gets back, Kurt cocks a hip out and starts to call him out as a seat-stealer when he's interrupted by Noah pulling him down on his lap. He'd not even stopped his conversation with Warbler John, who turns out to be the beat-boxer that Kurt barely remembers.

With a long-suffering sigh, Kurt just turns back to Blaine, who's sitting in a chair in front of the couch, and continues talking about working at the Lima Bean and what he's going to do in New York. They're talking about where all he can apply for internships when Noah pats Kurt on the hip.

"Babe, I gotta get another beer. Hey, Sebastian?" When Seb turns his head, cocking an eyebrow, Noah says, "Hold this for me." and picks Kurt up, putting him in Sebastian's lap. Before Kurt can do much more than squeak, Noah leans over and whispers, "Told you that you'd pay for this morning."

After Noah struts away, Kurt is left with a full face blush, sitting on Sebastian Smythe's lap, in front of a **very** amused David and Blaine. Sebastian just shrugs, wrapping an arm around Kurt's waist, and turning back to David to continue arguing over the merits of lacrosse versus hockey.

Kurt is trying very hard not to hyperventilate, and he knows Blaine can tell. Blaine just giggles and tries to distract him with where all in New York he could apply for a job in fashion or musical theater. After a few minutes of quiet discussion and drinking, Kurt seems to relax. He adjusts slightly, turning to the side on Seb's lap, so he can better face Blaine and David.

Eventually, they all get pulled into talking about plans for next year, this being the first time David has heard that Kurt didn't get into NYADA. After awhile, he realizes that Noah never came back and glances around. He eventually spots him sitting with Quinn under one arm while he talks to Santana, who looks very drunk. Almost everyone else is drunk-dancing while Rachel sings on her karaoke machine.

The next time Kurt shifts, he accidentally presses himself farther back on Sebastian's lap. With a jolt, he realizes that Sebastian is hard. _Oh shit. No no no. I can_ _ **not**_ _get an erection in these pants, I'll bust a seam._

Kurt hops up, grabbing Blaine's hand. "Dance with me! I need to dance. Let's dance!"

Blaine just giggles at Kurt's repetition, "Okaaaay, I guess we're going to go dance."

After Kurt has dragged him onto the dance floor, Blaine stretches up to whisper, "What the hell was that?"

Kurt glances back and forth, making sure there's no one around before moving closer to him and whispering back, "That was me avoiding a scene. Sebastian had a hard-on. I don't know if he's a lightweight and a horny drunk or what, but yeah. I could **not** handle that right now."

Blaine giggles again, "I guess I got you **that** just in time huh?"

Kurt blushes again and just drops his head on Blaine's shoulder. "You have no idea."

 _Now I just have to find more than three minutes to myself to_ _**use** _ _it._

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

As Sebastian watches Kurt run away, dragging Blaine behind him, he can't help but glare at the countertenor. He's distracted a second later by loud laughter coming from Dave.

"Oh, that sucks, dude. I told you. It happens to the best of us, man."

Sebastian just growls out, "What are you talking about?"

Dave looks mildly apologetic, but mostly amused, "Fancy. He friend-zoned you didn't he? What did you do? Pinch his ass?"

Sebastian huffs and drinks the rest of his beer. "Hardly. He just wouldn't stop squirming, so I may have gotten a little hard. Apparently, it offended his delicate sensibilities." _Except I know that something like that shouldn't have bothered him. He jokes about sex too much to be that bothered by a physical response... so what the hell?_ _ **Am**_ _I friend-zoned? Ugh._

"Well, either way, looks like he's off limits." Dave has a shit eating grin on.

"Ya know, for someone who's supposedly over him, you sure are excited about me not tapping his ass." Sebastian puts his empty bottle down on the table.

Dave snorts, "It's not really about him. I'm just honored to get to witness the great Sebastian Smythe be shot down. Even **you** can't manage to pry him out of his skinny jeans. Begs the question, what the hell is Anderson packing?"

With a scoff, Sebastian says, "Trust me. It's not that impressive. Blaine bottomed anyway. Kind of a sore spot with 'Fancy' actually." When he notices Dave staring at him with his mouth open, Sebastian smirks, "Apparently I'm not quite as deep in the friend-zone as you are, Davey. Kurt has no problem talking about that shit."

Dave shakes his head, "No, I believe that, he's pretty open about most things. I'm more wondering how you got him to tell you Anderson has a small dick."

Sebastian gets up, "Oh, it's not small, it's just average. And he didn't tell me, I've seen it. I'm going to go get drunk."

Without waiting for a response, Sebastian heads over to the table with the booze, deciding that the only thing left to do is drink until he stops thinking about Kurt's ass.

* * *

 

An hour later, Sebastian isn't quite sure how he got here. He's sitting in a chair by the stage, with Steven straddling his lap. They've been making out for a few minutes and Sebastian is really just not that impressed.

 _Ugh. He tastes like Cheetos and peppermint schnapps._ When Steven leans in to whisper in his ear, Sebastian has to force himself to look away from where Kurt is dancing sandwiched between Blaine and Dave. Eventually he realizes that he was supposed to be listening, and barely catches the end of his sentence.

"-long time. Are you coming back to Blaine's?" Sebastian thinks about it, he hadn't really considered going with them. He knows that Steven has been sending him the most unsubtle signals in the world for the past couple months, clearly having heard the rumors about him. He'd never been tempted before. He's not bad looking... just kind of **cheap**. _How cheap does someone have to be before even_ _ **I**_ _notice?_

Just when Sebastian's about to tell him 'No', Puck comes out of no where and grabs Kurt, dragging him back up the stairs, a very drunk Rachel screaming "Stay off my bed, Noah!"

Sebastian suddenly feels his stomach clench, _I can't go back to that room and sleep with them there, together, freshly fucked._

"Sure, baby, why not?"


	14. Chapter 14

[Kurt]

When Noah is dragging him out of the room and up the stairs, Kurt pretends not to see Sebastian's hands moving down to the guy's ass. They go up to Rachel's room, lock the door, and sit on the bed, facing each other. "Didn't she say to stay off her bed?"

Noah just smirks, "She thinks we're going to fuck on it, Princess. I'm sure she'd be fine with us just talking here."

Kurt shrugs. "What did you want to talk about?"

"How 'bout the fact that you had your head buried in Karofsky's chest so you wouldn't have to look at Sebastian?" Noah gives him a knowing look.

"Ugh. Can we not talk about it? It's fine. He's going to hook up with a warbler. It's not that big of a deal." Kurt flops back on the bed.

"Sure, it's not. That's why you're pouting about it." At Kurt's glare, Noah chuckles, "I've seen how you look at him, Princess."

Kurt sighs, closing his eyes, "It's just physical. It's **Sebastian**. You know there can't be actual feelings involved. If he even agreed to sleep with me, it'd be a one night stand. The absolute best I could hope for would be friends-with-benefits. And honestly, it's not going to happen. He doesn't see me that way. He never has."

"How do you know?" Noah raises an eyebrow.

"Aside from the obvious? He told me. We talked about it after the whole basket thing. He used David as an example, which I get. Someone hot as hell, but someone you couldn't sleep with."

Noah leans back on his hands, "He'd only really known you for a week at that point. How do you know he still feels that way?"

Blushing all the way down his neck, Kurt says, "L-last Saturday, the day the wars started, I was taking a bath... and thinking about how Sebastian had climbed into bed with us... and I kind of... um... removed you from the picture and was..." Kurt stops himself, huffing. "I was jacking off, okay? And he walked in. I guess it was too early, and he was half asleep, and didn't realize the bathroom was... occupied."

Noah laughs, "Oh god, I'm sorry I missed this. Was his face **priceless**?"

"No. Actually, he looked horrified. He screamed and slammed the door." Kurt huffs. "So now I don't know if he was just telling me he thought I was hot just to be nice, or if he was just shocked, or if he sees me as a baby penguin as much as Blaine used to. None of it is good news."

"Well, either way, he's bound to have thought about it since then. Let's take him out of the equation, what it is that **you** want?"

Kurt sighs and lays down beside him, putting his head on Noah's chest. "I don't know. I don't think I really know him well enough to know if I could actually **love** him or not. We never talk about him. It's all about **my** past, what **I've** done. Neither of us have even mentioned our mothers... but... physically? Yeah. I'd take pretty much anything he offered. Which is sad."

"It's not sad, Princess, it's normal. No one can control who they're attracted to. All you can control is what you do about it. You know that I feel that way about you. If, at any time, you decide to take on Puckzilla, you know I'd be down for that. I'm pretty sure our friendship would survive. I don't know what would happen if we dated, but hell, I'd try that too. You're the most important person in my life right now, besides Beth, who isn't really mine either anymore."

"Noah, Beth may not be in your care, but she's still your daughter. At least you get to see her, spend time with her. And I'm yours, too. I'm just not 'your man'. You'll have to accept that someone else gets first rights, if I ever actually manage to keep a relationship going." Kurt sighs.

"And you're sure it can't be him?" Noah looks down at him.

"I don't know, Noah. I doubt it. It's too hard to keep someone locked in a basement in this day and age. And that's the only way it would happen."

* * *

 

When Kurt and Noah come back downstairs they are met with a loud chorus of cheers. Kurt just puts on his bitchface and looks around for Blaine or David. When he finally finds them, he almost swallows his tongue. Which is ironic. Because they're trying their very best to eat each other, mouths first.

When he stops dead, Noah runs into his back. "What the fuck, Princess?" Looking over his shoulder, Noah cheers louder than everyone else had. "Get ya' some, Karofsky!"

David doesn't even stop, just lift his hand off Blaine's ass to flip Noah off, before putting it back. Kurt can't stop the giggle-fit that erupts at that. He finally turns to Noah, pointedly not looking around the room. "Okay, it's getting late and I clearly need to get Sam and David home before they get in trouble."

"Sure, sure, babe." After looking around the room, Noah spots Sebastian, hand almost shoved down the back of that warbler's pants. "Uh, you get Dave, I'm gonna look for Sam."

Kurt isn't fooled, but doesn't ask. "Right. See ya outside." When Kurt walks up to the couch, he's almost sorry to interrupt, but he really needs to get out of there. "Okay guys, break it up. You'll see each other at my house tomorrow, for my birthday almost-a-party. I'll even text you both each others' numbers. But I really need to get home."

When they break apart, David is obviously too drunk to pick up on anything, but Blaine looks over to the corner by the stage and smiles sadly, "No problem, hun. Let's get this big guy outside, huh?"

While they are each putting an arm around David, Kurt can see Noah all but dragging a half-asleep Sam up the stairs.

Once they get Sam laying out in the middle row, and David climbs into the passenger seat, Kurt glances back at Noah and Blaine. "Um, do you think one of you could go get Sebastian? I'm just going to text Finn and tell him we're going."

Blaine volunteers, "I'll go. I'd probably be a bit more... tactful." After he walks away, Noah nods,

"That's probably true. All I want to do is break his face."

Kurt takes a deep breath, "It's not his fault, Noah. He just doesn't feel the same way I do."

Kurt's phone chimes, interrupting Noah's muttering. Eventually Kurt finds his voice enough to tell him, "Um. So... Sebastian is going to Blaine's with the warblers."

When Noah's back stiffens and he looks pissed off enough to storm back inside, Kurt says, "Stop! It's fine. Honestly, I'm exhausted. I just want to go home and sleep. It's one less drunk boy to deal with."

Noah watches him for a second before saying, "You sure, babe?"

Kurt huffs, cocking a hip, "Yes! I'm fine-" He's cut off by Finn running outside. He bends double, out of breath, and says,

"Puck! Dude, can you stay? Quinn is really drunk and she won't stop asking where you went, and Santana keeps crying, saying she doesn't know what she's going to do next year without Brittany, and I really just don't know what the fuck to do. Everyone else is too drunk to care."

When Noah turns back to Kurt, he waves him off, "Go, Noah, it's fine. I'm going to take David home, get Sam in bed, and then sleep. There's no reason for you to blow off the party just because I'm stupid. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, but only because the douche is going with Helmet Hair." Noah hugs him, whispering, "I'm going to steal Finn's phone, text me when you get home. Love you, babe."

Kurt has to fight off tears, "Love you too, Noah." After he's climbed into the Navigator, Kurt takes a minute to find his bag, digging out a tissue. When he glances at the other two boys, he isn't surprised at all to find them both asleep. Shaking his head, he starts up his car. Right before he pulls out, he hears his phone chime.

_From Blaine: Um... as soon as Puck came in and grabbed a drink, Quinn attacked him with her face, which Puck laughed at, but didn't stop. Things are getting weird here._

Kurt considers responding, but decides against it. As he makes his way to David's house, barely two minutes later, he hears his phone chime again. And again. When he stops the car, the first thing he does is check his messages.

_From Blaine: o wow. When Seb saw what was going on with Puck, he literally dropped Steven in the floor and stomped over to him, demanding to know what he was even still doing here._

_From Blaine: Okay, last update, bc I know you're driving. Seb isn't coming with us. He said he's just going to go crash on Rachel's couch. Didn't even make sure Steven was ok._

Kurt mentally cheers, _He's not going to sleep with him?!_ Eventually he texts back,

_**To Blaine: Thanks for the info, I'm dealing with drunk boys, I'll see you tomorrow! =D** _

Kurt doesn't even try to keep the wide grin off his face, suddenly excited to have his room to himself. "Come on, David! Let's get you inside."

_Looks like I'm going to be using my new toy after all._

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

As the silver SUV pulls up outside the Hudson-Hummel house, Sebastian feels like his head is going to explode. By the time he manages to stumble inside, Rachel is already throwing their arms around Kurt and wishing him Happy Birthday. Puck and Finn have disappeared upstairs.

Sebastian just goes up, determined to drown himself in the shower to escape the pounding in his head.

An hour, some aspirin, and a shower later, Sebastian almost feels human again. By the time he makes it back downstairs, Rachel is gone. Kurt is in the kitchen playing around with what appears to be a new coffee machine.

"Hey. I hope your head doesn't feel like mine does." Seb sits at the table, putting his head down.

Kurt laughs, "Nope! Unlike some people, I didn't drink. I got home, spent a lovely evening by myself, and woke up early to make a coffee cake for our brunch/birthday almost-a-party." Kurt turns back to the coffee maker. "Want one? I've almost got the hang of it now. If I didn't work at the Lima Bean, I'd be so clueless."

Sebastian mutters, "Sure. You know my order, apparently." Glancing up at Kurt, he asks, "So, where did that thing come from?"

"Oh! Dad called, him and Carole got me this for my birthday. Now I won't spend a fortune on coffee when I get to New York. I love it! It does everything but kiss you hello in the morning." When Kurt walks over with a cup, Sebastian just grunts out a 'thanks', and tries to figure out what exactly happened the night before.

_Okay, so for the most part I remember what happened, but it doesn't make sense. Puck and Kurt weren't any more all over each other than usual. In fact, Puck put Kurt in my lap. Then Kurt ran off... understandable I guess. I somehow ended up spending most of the party with a lap full of horny warbler. I almost slept with said warbler._

_Then, after Kurt left, Puck stayed. And was making out with that Quinn chick. Ugh. I'm so confused. Are they together or not? It sounded like it the other night. But Kurt came back alone. And doesn't seem upset by it at all. Actually, he doesn't seem upset by anything. Which is good. It's his birthday, he shouldn't be miserable. Ugh. Whatever. I'll just survive this party thing and then go back to bed. At least I got his present and have managed to hide it from him._

Getting up and putting his cup back in the sink, Sebastian says, "Thanks, Peach." and gives him a kiss to the cheek, before heading out to his car to get the present out of the trunk. He doesn't notice the shocked look that Kurt gives him as he walks away.

* * *

 

[Kurt]

Later, as Kurt passes out the specialized coffee drinks, he's all but bouncing due to the awesomeness that is his dad's present. While he's eating the Pecan Coffee Cake he'd made that morning, he can't help but glance around. Kurt is a little shocked that Finn is the only completely straight man in the room. _Wow. Remember when I was the only gay guy I knew? Holy shit._

Finn was sitting with Sam on the floor, talking about CoD. David was sitting in the chair, peeking glances at Blaine while talking to Sebastian, not being subtle at **all**. Blaine was on the end of the couch, just kind of... gazing dreamily at David. _Okay, that's weird. I'm going to have to talk to him about that._ And Noah was sitting on the other side from Blaine, with Kurt in his lap, rubbing his lower back while he kicked at Finn and Sam.

_We're the weirdest group ever._ Kurt is still buzzing from opening presents. He can't believe how blessed he is with these friends. Finn got him a portable iphone charger, so he wouldn't be running around with low battery in New York. Sam got him noise canceling headphones, in case he couldn't sleep with all the street sounds there. David had given him a beautiful silver brooch, shaped like a heart with vines or something on it. He said it had been his grandmother's, but he didn't have sisters so he thought Kurt might want it. _I can't believe I almost cried, he looked so embarrassed._

Blaine had given him a new Alexander McQueen scarf, silver with white skulls this time. Noah had given him a tiny red toolbox, to keep on a desk, to remind him of not just Noah, but the garage and his dad. Sebastian... his gift came with a card that he opened first, that said simply,

_Happy Birthday! Don't freak out. They won't know how much this crap costs, and you know I don't care about money._

When Kurt had opened the box, he'd found a Tom Ford toiletry bag stuffed full of new pots and bottles of Kurt's bath products. Before he'd managed to have an aneurism at getting a birthday present worth more than a thousand dollars, Noah had laughed. "I guess he learned his lesson about the bath shit, huh? You really need to tell me what all was in that basket some day."

Sebastian cuts in, "No way. No one ever needs to know what all was in that basket. Ever."

When Kurt looks up, still wide eyed, the only person that seems to have any idea is Blaine, and he's just smiling softly at him. _**Rich people**_ _, they just don't get it._

After stammering out his thanks, Kurt had quickly moved on, trying to distract from the presents until he could decide what the hell to do about it.

After everyone finishes their cake, Finn and Sam go around gathering up the dishes, putting them in the kitchen. When they've sat back down, Kurt says, "Thank all of you so much, your presents mean the world to me, they were all so thoughtful!"

They all laugh lightly, clearly seeing Kurt is a little overwhelmed. Noah pats his ass, while David says, "No problem, Fancy. You've been an awesome friend to all of us. Even those of us that didn't deserve you."

Kurt is a little surprised at the amount of 'hear, hear' type comments that come from around the room. That's when Kurt notices. He slowly looks from face to face. "Oh my god. I'm a masochist." When everyone stares at him in shock, he elaborates, "Every one of you was horrible to me at one point. Even Blaine, with his drunken Rachel crush and then convincing me I wasn't sexy."

Blaine flushes at that, only mildly embarrassed until Noah pinches Kurt's ass and says, "Well, clearly the hobbit changed his tune."

Blaine groans, "Why? Why are people still calling me Hobbit?! I'm almost 5'8! That's not that short!"

Kurt just shrugs, "Sorry, hun. In this room, it is. I'm the shortest guy here besides you and even I'm 5'11. Everyone else here is over six foot. Apparently I **do** have a type. Tall, asshole jocks." Kurt let's out a long-suffering sigh.

Blaine pouts, trying to ignore the snickers and looks he gets. David just laughs, "Well, damn. I didn't mean to point it out if you didn't realize it."

Before Kurt can respond, Sam throws his hand up, "Wait! I wasn't mean! Actually, Kurt, **you** turned **me** down for the duet. Remember?"

Kurt cheers, and immediately gets up, walking over to drop down into Sam's lap. "Ha! At least I have **one** friend with no bad memories."

Kurt ignores Noah's sulking and Sebastian's mumbled "Unless you count drunken kiss-rape." Sam just holds Kurt around the waist and opens his legs, dropping Kurt down on the floor between his knees.

That seems to make Finn relax a little. _Honestly, I'm really surprised he's handling the lap sitting as well as he is. Noah will be so disappointed, we've almost trained the homophobia out of him._

As Kurt leans back against Sam's chest, Finn says, "Okay, how 'bout we watch a movie?"

* * *

 

That night, Kurt is in his room, his hair still wet from his shower. He's sorting through his birthday gifts, trying to decide what to pack into the boxes he's keeping in his closet and what to set out to be used in the next few months. When he gets to the toiletry bag, he sits on the edge of the bed and just holds it, still not really believing that Sebastian had spent that much money on him.

_I'm so fucking confused. He runs so hot and cold that I never know what's going on. One minute he's calling me hot and flirting with me a little... the next he's shut down and all over some random guy. But then, he didn't actually sleep with Steven..._

"Ugh." Kurt gets up, putting the bag into a box. As much as he'd love to sit there and hug it to his chest all day, that'd be embarrassing and honestly, he won't **need** a toiletry kit for awhile.

When Kurt lays back on his bed, staring at the ceiling, he finally comes to the conclusion that he's just going to have to ask Sebastian what the hell is going on.

He's just resolved himself to bringing it up the next time they're alone when Sebastian walks in. "Alright, it's just us. After Sam left to meet his dad, Finn and I cleaned up the mess. There's even enough cake left over that I managed to wrap a huge slice of it and hide it, so Burt and Carole can have some. Finn just left to go spend one last night with Rachel. Poor bastard. " He flops on his bed.

Kurt sits up, watching him warily. Noah said he'd go home tonight. Supposedly he has to babysit, but Kurt knows better. He only 'needs to babysit' when he's avoiding something. In this case it's more like giving Kurt space so he **can't** avoid something.

_Jesus, it's not the end of the world! Worst case, you embarrass yourself. It won't be the last time. You can always escape to Blaine's or Noah's if you have to._

Kurt coughs, "Can I ask you something?"

Sebastian sits up, scooting back to sit against the window, "Sure, what's up?"

Fidgeting slightly, and all but sitting on his hands, Kurt finally just blurts out, "What's going on with us?" When he sees Sebastian furrow his brows in confusion and open his mouth, Kurt charges on, "I mean... you keep running hot and cold. One second you act like we're really close, and you might actually like me, then you act like you couldn't care less about me. I'm just a little confused."

They sit in silence for a few seconds, Sebastian looking like he's debating what to say. Eventually he asks, "Well, what's going on with you and Puck?"

Now it's Kurt's turn to be confused, "I don't understand. I told you, we're really close but we can't actually be together because I'm really not ready to get that serious, and Noah is definitely serious."

"So... you guys haven't slept together?" Sebastian is watching him, like he's trying to detect a lie.

"N-no! Well, obviously, we sleep together all the time, but we haven't had sex!"

"Well, what happened on Monday?" Sebastian looks confused again.

Kurt has to stop and think, it's been such a long week... _Monday... I started work, then I helped Noah study._ "Oh! You mean the kiss?" At Seb's raised eyebrow, Kurt says, "We were studying, and he was throwing himself a pity party, so I told him that I wished I'd given him my virginity. He was still all depressed, so I kissed him. It went on a bit longer than I had planned, but eventually we pulled apart and he went and took a very long shower. That was it. We agreed that it couldn't happen again or things would get too out of hand. But it was a nice memory, so I don't regret it."

Sebastian mutters, "That shower gets way too much action." Kurt giggles. After a few seconds, Sebastian says, "So... wait. You guys aren't together? Nothing has changed between you guys since the last time we talked about it?"

"Nope. Actually, the last time Noah and I were alone all we did was talk about-" Kurt realizes what he was about to say and cuts himself off. _Oh no. That's going a bit far._

Sebastian waits, but when it becomes clear he won't continue, he says, "Then, what the hell was that at the party?"

"Um... Noah could tell I was upset, so he pulled me out of the room to talk to me. It didn't really help me at all, but at least it got me out of the room." Kurt goes back to fidgeting.

Sebastian tries to wrack his brain for what would have upset Kurt. The only time he remembers seeing Kurt freak out had been when he'd ran onto the dance floor with Blaine. "Was it my fault?" When he sees Kurt suck in a breath he says, "Shit! I'm sorry. I didn't think me getting a hard-on would freak you out that much. Surely to God, you're used to it! You sit on Puck's lap all the time, how does he not get hard?!"

Kurt stammers, "I-it wasn't that! I- uh..." _Fuck it._ "I was hiding my face in David's chest so I wouldn't have see you making out with Steven. Noah noticed and pulled me out of the room. He told me that he could tell by the way I was acting that I was into you. When I explained that I knew it was pointless, he just listened. Then when we got back downstairs, I'm not sure what you were doing, but he chased me outside with David and Blaine so I wouldn't see it. Then I left... Noah stayed behind to help with Quinn and Santana."

By this point, Kurt is staring at his feet. He really can't believe he just told Sebastian all that. _My word vomit should come with a warning label. Oh jeez... what am I going to do now? He's going to freak out and run away, and then I'll get to explain to dad why his friend's son is suddenly avoiding us. Good times._

Kurt is pulled out of his mental freak out by Sebastian saying, "So... I'm not friend-zoned?"

Kurt's head snaps up, " **What?** "

Sebastian scoots forward on his bed, saying "Dave seems to be under the impression that you friend-zone anyone that gets near you because you assume they're straight or something. He named like four or five guys that you 'don't see that way'. After you ran off at the party, he told me I was friend-zoned and that's why you freaked."

Kurt just sits in dead silence for almost a full minute before saying, "Sebastian... I don't know how to tell you this... but... You're gay." In keeping with tradition, Sebastian throws a pillow at him, laughing. "Sorry, couldn't resist. But um... no. You're not. I knew you were gay, so I guess my mind didn't close you into that box like it did with the others. Which actually confuses me, because you flat out told me you wouldn't sleep with me. But, for some reason my mind wouldn't throw you into the just-a-friend category."

Kurt huffs, _I really want this conversation over. It's awesome that he's not freaking out but, really? Do we have to sit around and talk about how undesirable I am?_

Sebastian shifts a little, clearing his throat, "Just to recap, at the party, you didn't actually mind that I got hard, you just didn't know what it meant. You were upset by me making out with warbler #7. You are not, in fact, fucking Noah Puckerman. You don't want anything serious, because if you did, you'd do it with Puck. And you like me enough to be upset by me sleeping with other people."

Kurt glares at Sebastian. "Well, that ties everything up into a neat little bow of 'This fucking sucks', thanks for pointing it out, Meerkat." Kurt says bitterly. Sebastian can't stop the devious grin that takes over him at that moment. Kurt shifts backwards a little, wary of the sudden change. "What?"

Without responding, Sebastian stands up and before Kurt can really process what's going on, he's being pushed backward on the bed with Sebastian hovering over him. _This seems familiar. Noah is going to have a field day with this._

"Um... not that I'm complaining, but what the hell are you doing?"

Sebastian stares at Kurt's mouth before answering, "See... I haven't really talked to you about this because it's kind of embarrassing to me. I stopped having one night stands around Valentine's Day. I had a guy that I slept with every now and then for a little while, but he got clingy so I stopped." At Kurt's cocked eyebrow, Sebastian continues, "So, I haven't gotten laid in months. Which is why I got hard when you were squirming in my lap."

Kurt can't really process this, he's wide eyed and staring at Sebastian. "So... I still don't really understand what you're doing. You told me you wouldn't sleep with me."

Sebastian smirks, "I changed my mind. To be fair, when I said that, I was already in denial. If you remember, that's what started the whole basket fiasco. I have since moved on. I've accepted that I want to tear off your ridiculous clothes and bend you over whatever surface is handy."

Kurt chokes on air for a second, "Okay, wait. So this whole God damned time that I've been jacking myself off to thoughts of you, we could have just kicked Noah out and had sex? Jesus fuck. How is this my life?!"

Sebastian groans, "That time I saw you? **That's** what you were thinking about? Me?"

Kurt nods, wrapping his arms a round Sebastian's shoulders. When Sebastian leans down to kiss him, Kurt stops him with a hand to the chest, "Um, can I ask an awkward question first?"

Sebastian presses his hips down on Kurt's, letting him feel how hard he is, "Only if it's a quick one."

Kurt giggles but just says, "So... um. Blaine and I have only ever been with each other. And... no judgment but, I know you've been with quite a few more than most people our age..."

It takes Sebastian a second to work through Kurt's logic. Eventually he asks, "Are you trying to ask if I'm clean?" Kurt blushes but nods. Sebastian smiles at him, pleased that even if he's inexperienced, at least he isn't stupid. "Yes, Peach. I'm clean. I've never done it without a condom and I got tested every three months, including after the last time, when I dumped Sir Handsy."

Kurt smiles at him, relieved. "Thank god." Kurt pulls Sebastian down onto him, signaling that the questioning portion of the evening was done now.

When Sebastian first kisses him, Kurt is mildly surprised, he'd figured Sebastian would be rough, aggressive. Instead he started out soft, a little unsure, as if giving Kurt a chance to back out. _Nuts to that._ Kurt grabs the back of Sebastian's head and pulls him down closer, opening his legs so Sebastian can settle between them and running his tongue along Seb's lower lip, seeking entrance. With a moan, Sebastian opens his mouth, letting his tongue run along Kurt's before pushing it into his mouth. Kurt gets lost in the rapidly deepening kisses, and pretty soon he can't tell you how long they've been laying there.

When he comes back to himself, he's a little surprised to find his legs wrapped around Sebastian's waist and his hands tangled in his hair. Kurt raises his hips to grind against him and moans loudly at the feel of his cock rubbing against Sebastian's. He breaks his mouth away, Sebastian immediately moving down to his neck, and says, "I haven't had sex in almost two months. I really need to get my pants off."

Pulling his mouth away, Sebastian says, "God yes. Less clothes. Awesome idea." Sebastian stands up, quickly stripping off his own shirt and working on his pants. Kurt easily removes his clothes, wearing only sleeping pants, boxers, and a slightly too small sweater. When they are both finally naked, they take a minute to eye each other, Kurt still splayed out on the bed. Kurt groans, staring up at Sebastian, _Oh god. Okay, so he's quite a bit bigger than Blaine..._

When Sebastian goes to lay back on top of him however, Kurt flips them so that he's on top. Sebastian just raises an eyebrow, "I thought you wanted to bottom?"

Kurt smirks before leaning down to smack a quick kiss on Sebastian's lips. "Who said you have to be on the bottom to bottom?" Without waiting for a response, Kurt leans over to his nightstand drawer, pulling out his bottle of lube, a condom, and the box of tissues, and laying them on the bed. When he settles back in Sebastian's lap, Kurt looks nervous.

"Seriously? **Now** you're worried? Just spit it out, babe." Sebastian runs a hand over Kurt's thigh, hoping to soothe him a little.

_He's been with enough people that he shouldn't freak out..._ Kurt sucks in a breath. "Okay. This might seem weird, but just go with it okay?" When all he gets is a nod, Kurt leans down and continues kissing Sebastian, reaching a hand down to squeeze his dick. After a minute of mapping Seb's cock out with his fingers, trying to memorize the feel and shape of it, Kurt sits up.

Grabbing the lube, Kurt covers his fingers and reaches back behind himself. Sebastian raises his eyebrows when Kurt only takes 15 or 20 seconds before reaching forward and grabbing the condom. He holds it with his clean hand and rips it open with his teeth, then carefully rolls it down onto Sebastian.

Using the leftover lube from his hand, Kurt slicks up the straining cock, and then climbs up Sebastian's body until he's straddling his waist. Biting his lip and refusing to look at Sebastian's face, afraid of what he might see there, Kurt reaches down and aims the condom-covered length. Without any more warning, Kurt starts to slowly sink down a little.

Before Sebastian has time to really react, because 'he's not prepped enough for that dammit!', Kurt pulls back off. After a few seconds, Kurt eases back down, almost taking the whole head inside, before lifting off again. Sebastian groans, Kurt smirks.

The next time Kurt goes down, he pushes past the pain and sinks almost half of the length inside him. Stopping for a minute to give himself time to ease the pain, Kurt finally glances up at Sebastian. He lets out a surprised laugh at the look on Seb's face. His eyes are slammed shut with his mouth opened a little, panting slightly. When Kurt goes to move, Sebastian grabs his hips. "N-no! Don't move! For fuck's sake, give me a second."

Realizing that he's probably trying not to come, Kurt leans down and starts sucking at Sebastian's neck, slowly moving down his chest. When he bites at his nipple, tired of being patient, Sebastian grunts and bucks his hips up, sliding another inch into Kurt. "Guh!" Kurt leans back up, bracing his hands on Sebastian's chest, "Bas! Jesus, you have to let me move."

Sebastian grips his hands tighter on Kurt's hips, helping to lift him a little. Kurt quickly pushes back down, needing to feel all of his cock inside him. When Sebastian moans encouragingly and tightens his hold on Kurt's hips to bruising, Kurt starts to slowly move up and down, quickly picking up speed. After just a few minutes, Kurt is riding Sebastian as hard and fast as he can, trying to get him deeper. As Sebastian starts slamming his hips up, angling toward Kurt's prostate, Kurt suddenly cries out,

"Ahh! Oh god!" Now that Sebastian has found that spot, he abuses it mercilessly, hitting it with almost every thrust, turning Kurt into a babbling mess. "I-I'm gonna- Bas!" Taking one hand off Kurt's waist, Sebastian reaches over and starts pulling at his neglected cock. Kurt's hips stutter before he slams himself down one more time, clamping down on Sebastian as he comes all over their chests and Sebastian's hand.

Feeling Kurt clench around him, Sebastian barely manages another three thrusts before he's coming, buried as far into Kurt as he can get. Not bothering to move, Kurt just slumps down onto Sebastian's chest, Seb wrapping his arms around him. Sebastian, still trying to catch his breath, says, "Jesus Christ, Kurt."

After a few seconds, Kurt sits back up, reaching down to hold the condom down as he pulls himself off of Sebastian. He flops down on his back, clearly using the last of his energy. Sebastian huffs a laugh, removing and tying off the condom. Wrapping it and the foil in tissue, Sebastian tosses them in the trashcan tucked under Kurt's nightstand. Kurt giggles, "Yeah, that's the last thing my dad needs to find in here." After cleaning themselves up using the tissues, Sebastian seems uncertain about what to do next.

Kurt rolls his eyes, crawling off the bed to grab his sleep pants and Sebastian's t-shirt from the floor. Kurt snags Seb's boxer-briefs and shoves them at him before getting dressed. When they are both covered, Kurt takes Sebastian's hand and climbs back into bed, pulling him down with him. He mumbles, "Just sleep, we'll talk in the morning."

As he drifts off to sleep, curled into Sebastian's chest, Kurt thinks to himself,

_Best birthday ever._


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unnecessary explanation is unnecessary. They spend a lot of time talking about things most people would just gloss over or shrug off, but Kurt has only been with a virgin and as Seb points out, there hasn't been a lot of trust in his bedroom either... so just go with me on this okay?

[Sebastian]

As Sebastian blinks his eyes open in the morning, the first thing he sees is Kurt's forehead. _Oh shit. So it wasn't a dream... I really fucked Kurt Hummel last night?!_

Glancing at the clock, he's relieved to find it's not quite 5am. _I don't need to leave for school for another hour... Well, shit. Now what do I do?_ Having never actually spent the night in bed with someone, Sebastian is a bit out of his depth. Eventually, he puts his head back down on his pillow and just watches Kurt sleep, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. _Is this creepy? I've never actually seen him sleep. He usually wakes up before I do. Unless he's in bed with Puck. Shit. Don't think about that. They aren't_ _ **together**_ _. Fuck. Are_ _ **we**_ _together?_

Before he can really start to lose it, Kurt groans a little, shifting. Sebastian panics, freezing. Blinking his eyes open, Kurt giggles a little at seeing Sebastian look like a deer caught in headlights. "Good morning."

"Um... g'morning..." Sebastian coughs, unsure what to do now that Kurt has woke up. Kurt, clearly sensing his unease, just leans forward, pecking a kiss at Sebastian.

"Let me go brush my teeth and flatten my hair down, then we can talk about the hot mess we got ourselves into last night, okay?" At his nod, Kurt pops out of bed and walks slowly to the bathroom.

Figuring he should also brush his teeth, Sebastian gets up, grabbing a pair of jersey shorts, and waiting for Kurt to come back out.

When Sebastian comes back into the room, Kurt is sitting up in bed, still wearing Sebastian's shirt, twisting it in his hands. "Hi. Ready to get this over with?" Sebastian laughs, moving back over to the bed and sitting beside him. When he looks back at Kurt, the countertenor smiles, "Okay, you must have questions, go."

"Uh... first, no complaints, but what exactly are we doing? Was that a one time thing?"

Kurt shifts, "Did you want it to be?"

Sebastian looks at him carefully, "Not really. I don't date, which I'm sure you can guess. But like I said last night, I stopped hooking up with randoms. I had a fuck buddies thing going for awhile, but I think he was falling in love, and just no. So, I called it off. I don't really miss the whole bar scene, but I miss the sex."

Kurt nods, "Alright, well, you know that I'm not looking for serious either. Like you so lovingly put it last night, if I wanted that, I'd have it with Noah. I have no problem dating casually, but honestly? I'm leaving in a few months. So... starting to date someone now would be a horrible idea. But I also miss the sex. As fun as it is to cuddle with friends, even sleep beside Noah, I'm still a teenage boy. I like getting off as much as the next guy."

Sebastian just watches him, eventually saying, "So... would you be open to a friends-with-benefits thing until you go to New York? It sounds, on paper, like we want the same things. At least for now. Sex with someone I can trust, who's hot, but won't expect a ring in a few months? Sounds perfect."

Kurt smiles, "I agree. While I am actually more dating oriented, I think I could manage a sex only thing with you. We're not super close the way I am with Noah. But, we're friends, and I do trust you, at least in the sex department. And ya know, you're hot as hell." At Sebastian's smirk, Kurt says, "Too bad you're already so aware of that."

"Awesome. We'll get back to figuring out the whole 'fucking each other' thing in a minute. I really have to ask though, what the hell was that last night?"

Kurt blushes, "Um... be more specific?"

Sebastian turns to face him better, "How bout the, like, **no** prep thing? That can't have really been how you prefer it."

Flushing all the way down his neck, Kurt says, "Actually... yeah. Pretty much." Sebastian just cocks an eyebrow and waits for more explanation. "Ugh. Okay, so... you know I hadn't really bottomed except the one time. So... my experience has all been just me by myself... After the first few times, when it really hurt and needed a lot of stretching... I got used to it. It could have been because Blaine is a little on the smaller side, but... I figured out that if I went slowly, and carefully, and made sure to use plenty of lube... I didn't need to prep. I could just... ease myself into it. It's so much less messy."

Sebastian just stares at him. "You're fucking kidding me, right? You take cock, unprepped, because you don't want to get your hands dirty? Seriously?"

Kurt huffs, smacking Sebastian on the arm, "That's not the only reason! It's the reason I tried it, though. What I found out was that I kind of liked a little pain. Too much stretching and it kind of bores me a bit? So I take it slow, do it at my own pace, and then, yeah..."

Since he gets nothing but silence, Kurt continues, "And, admittedly, you would have been a bit big for that, but I had... um... made use of my night alone. So it hadn't been that long..." When Sebastian just continues staring at him, Kurt wraps his arms around himself. "I-is it that weird?"

Sebastian laughs, but seeing Kurt flinch away, he realizes how much Kurt is admitting. "Uh, not gonna lie, it's a little weird. At least, to me. When I bottom, I need full prep, because **no**. I'm not one of those guys that likes the pain. More than playful scratching, and I'm done."

Kurt shifts, "What about other people you've been with? I figured at least one of them..."

Sebastian chuckles, moving closer to Kurt and pulling his arm from around himself, holding his hand. "Honestly, I have no idea. Even if they did prefer that, they wouldn't have done it with me. Would you have done that with someone you didn't even know?"

Kurt thinks about it before wincing, "Okay, no. I see your point. It would require a lot of trust."

At that, Sebastian smiles, leaning toward Kurt, "Ya know, that's the second or third time you've mentioned trusting me. How did I earn that honor?"

Kurt shrugs, "I don't actually know, just kind of happened. I blame David. He's making me soft toward previous-bullies."

Sebastian chuckles, "Well, whenever you want to bottom that way, it's fine with me. You were tight as fuck. If I'm on bottom though, I'm gonna need full prep. I can do it myself if it bothers you."

Kurt shakes his head, "No, no. At this point, I'm over the fingers thing. I just started out fairly squeamish about it. It's more of a 'the way it feels' thing for me now. Trust me, if you're going to let me bend you over, the least I can do is prep you. I'd slap the shit out of someone that expected otherwise from me, I don't expect any less from you."

Sebastian nods, still playing with Kurt's hand. "Seems fair. So, we will be switching then, right? You said before you didn't get to bottom, but you don't actually mind topping right? Because honestly, I love both..."

"Good. I'm not going to lie, I'll probably be bottom crazy for a bit, especially since we only have the summer, but I'm definitely good with both." Kurt bites his lip, "I have a question."

Sebastian nods for him to go on, so Kurt says, "I'm assuming this isn't anything we're going to broadcast. I personally would just tell people we're dating and be done with it, how we feel about it isn't anyone else's business, and it would keep us from having to hide it. But for obvious reasons, that's not really going to work, because it's you."

Sebastian tries not to be offended by that statement. _What? Would dating me be_ _ **so**_ _unbelievable?_ "Right."

"My question is, what do we tell the people that **do** find out? I can't imagine either one of us being subtle enough for no one to notice. Especially Noah. There's like, **no** chance he won't figure it out." Kurt seems unbothered by the idea, so Sebastian just shrugs.

"Honestly, except for like, your dad, I don't care who knows. Like you said, I don't think people would buy us dating, because it's me, but people knowing we fuck? I don't care either way." Sebastian can't stop the smirk that pops up, "As for Puck, yeah. There's no way for him to not know. When he climbs into your bed, he's gonna notice that you're not alone in it."

Kurt erupts into a giggle-fit, "Oh god. That image. His face." When he calms down, Kurt says, "That's another thing. How do we handle him? He won't be around as much now that he knows he has all summer, not just those few weeks, but he will still show up. And at least once a week, probably Friday nights, he will expect to sleep in bed with me."

Sebastian thinks about that for a second before saying, "Honestly? We're fucking, not dating. The nights he shows up, I'll move back to my bed. It's not that big of a deal. We can take a night off. Kind of like you having custody of a kid from a previous relationship. I wouldn't expect you to fuck me with the kid in the bed. And he was here first."

Kurt looks surprised at that, "You're really okay with just moving back to your bed and leaving Noah in mine? Because he was here first? Even Blaine had trouble with Noah in my bed and he didn't have to see it."

"Well, he was in love with you. And I have no desire to change what you have with Puck. I can't decide who needs that relationship more, you or him. I wouldn't try to interfere with that. And you shouldn't want shit to do with anyone that does. If they can't understand the way you are with your friends, they're not the one for you."

Kurt almost looks like he's going to cry. "Aww! Bas!" Kurt darts forward to press a kiss on him, throwing his arms around him. "Best fuck buddy ever! … Think we have time to shower together before you have to leave for school?"

_Jesus Christ. I may not actually survive this summer._

* * *

 

[Kurt]

That afternoon, Kurt meets Noah at the train station, waiting for Finn to break Rachel's heart. As Kurt stands on the platform, watching her board, he feels Noah's arms circle him from behind. Keeping his face carefully blank, Kurt leans back against his chest, watching as Rachel presses her hand against the glass. When Finn starts to chase the train, Kurt feels tears fall. By the time he and Noah catch up with him, Finn is almost on his knees. Kurt hugs him tight, Noah moving in on the side, holding him up.

They barely make it back to the car before Finn falls apart.

* * *

 

Pulling up outside his house, Kurt is relieved to see Sam and his dad have already packed up their truck, having left the station as soon as Rachel was out of sight. Sam and Noah manage to all but carry Finn inside. With a small, sad smile, Kurt goes into Finn's room. Sitting on the edge of the bed and rubbing Finn's back, they both pretend not to notice how wet his pillow is getting.

Sam eventually comes back in, telling them in a near whisper that he's ready to go. Kurt stands, moving away from the bed so Sam can sit, saying a quiet goodbye to Finn, who hugs him a little too tightly, but manages a watery smile and a fist bump. Kurt steps up to Sam, giving him an equally watery smile and giving him a long hug. When Sam steps back, he presses a quick kiss to Kurt's temple, wishing him good luck in New York.

Hours later, after Finn has fallen asleep, Kurt goes into his room, leaving the bathroom doors open in case he wakes up. As he leans back on his bed, thinking about Rachel, he has to wonder if Finn really did the right thing. _Couldn't they have tried long distance or something? I mean... I know it's not ideal, but going from 'Lets get married!' to 'See ya when I see ya!' … I guess it's a good thing he'll leave for basic training in a couple weeks. There's probably not a ten foot square in all of Lima that doesn't remind him of her._

_Now comes the bigger question, what the ever loving fuck am_ _**I** _ _doing? Okay, sex with Sebastian is amazing. I never really thought it wouldn't be. Practice makes perfect. Ugh. But seriously? We've been at this less than a day and I've already been in the shower with him. I never did that with Blaine. I was always more worried about my skin care routine or- holy shit. I actually skipped my routine last night too... I should have been more thorough this morning._

After a few minutes of panic, Kurt finally realizes just how quiet the house is. Glancing at the clock, Kurt grabs his phone and dials the garage. After about five rings, Noah finally answers.

"Shit- Hummel Tires and Lube."

Kurt huffs, "Noah! You can't cuss on the phone! What if I was some uptight mom with a minivan?"

Noah just grunts, "Sorry, Princess! I banged my knuckles because I was reaching for the phone. What's up?"

"I was mainly wondering where the hell you went. I was too busy with Finn to even notice you left."

"Well thanks babe, that makes me feel all kinds of special. Sam and his dad let me hitch a ride to work. You had your hands full. If you could pick me up and take me to get my truck though, that'd be awesome."

Kurt says, "Sure, I only have half a shift today, so I'll even help with some of the office work. You should have it down by now, if there's no problems it'll be the last time we have to babysit you about it."

Kurt can almost hear the smugness through the phone, "Sweet. So from now on when you help, you'll be wearing coveralls right?"

"Ugh. What is it with you and me working on cars?"

When Kurt gets the response of, "I just like watching you get dirty, Princess." he really isn't surprised.

_Probably shouldn't tell him about the shower then, huh?_

* * *

 

By Wednesday, Finn is mostly functional, if depressed. Kurt hurts a little more every time he sees Finn trying to pretend that everything is normal. He'd gotten a text from Sebastian Monday night, asking if he'd drive up in the Nav so he wouldn't have to make multiple trips. He'd agreed, mostly so he'd have the excuse of being around Dalton again. _It wasn't home, but I do miss it sometimes._

When Kurt pulls into visitor parking, he finds Sebastian leaning against a car, clearly waiting.

"Hey, Meerkat."

Sebastian smiles, "Good morning to you too, Sunshine. I have everything packed, we just need to load it up."

Kurt whines, "Can we go get coffee first? I was running late this morning and I drove almost two hours up here without any."

Chuckling, Sebastian puts a hand on Kurt's lower back, "Sure, babe. Why the late start?"

"On Monday, I was at the garage helping Noah. Then last night I had to work a double to pay back Brent for covering my shift so I could see Rachel off. Plus I've been dealing with a very mopey Finn for days. I'm exhausted." Kurt yawns widely, moving closer to lay his head on Sebastian's shoulder as they walk to the campus cafe.

They take their coffees and head to Sebastian's room, Kurt having no desire to small talk with people. When Sebastian climbs onto the stripped bed and holds his arms out for Kurt, he settles himself between Sebastian's legs, leaning back on his chest so he can drink his coffee.

Despite the caffeine jolt, Kurt finds himself getting more tired, not less so. Eventually he shakes himself, leaning forward. "Nope. Too comfortable. If you expect to drive home, especially in separate cars, I'm gonna need to wake up a bit."

Sebastian snorts, finishing his coffee and throwing the cup in the general direction of the trashcan, not caring that he missed. "You tell me how to wake you up, and I'll do it. Sorry though, I don't have my Victorian smelling salts handy."

Kurt throws his empty cup, cheering when he makes it into the trashcan. "Well, I was going to point out that I've always wanted to have sex here, but since you just implied I'm a fainting damsel, I think I'll pass." When Kurt goes to get up, he finds himself suddenly trapped under Sebastian, not really knowing how they got in that position.

"Oh really? Is it the blazers or the ties?"

Kurt just pats Sebastian on the cheek, "It sure as hell isn't the uniform. Although, now that I'm thinking about it, having you fuck me into the mattress wearing nothing but your Dalton blazer does have it's merits."

Trying very hard not to choke at the image, Sebastian says, "I don't know what exactly has suddenly turned you into a regular teenager, with hormones and everything, but I really like it."

Before Kurt can retort, Sebastian is kissing him. As they lose themselves in the kiss, more hands get involved. Suddenly Kurt can understand Blaine's frustration with his layers. _Maybe when I plan to be around Sebastian I should keep the accessories and extras to a minimum._

It's just as Sebastian manages to take off Kurt's sweater and starts working on his tie that his dorm room door slams open.

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

"Bas! You haven't left yet right?! Oh-!"

When Sebastian turns to look over his shoulder and sees Jeff standing in the doorway with a shit-eating grin on his face, he groans. _Oh god. The whole school will know by lunch._ _ **Fuck**_ _._

Sebastian drops his head down on Kurt's collarbone, growling out, "Goddammit, Jeff! It's called **knocking**. It's why doors were invented! And I said stop calling me that!"

When Kurt sees Nick poking his head around Jeff's shoulder, he sighs. "Shit. It's both of them. Get off me, Bas."

Sebastian sits up, leaning back against the wall where he was before. "Jesus. If you're not leaving, at least shut the fucking door."

By the time Jeff is settled in the chair, with Nick sitting on his lap, Kurt has managed to smooth his hair and put his cardigan back on. He sits back on the bed, Seb wrapping his arm around Kurt's waist. _Maybe if we give them enough visuals, they'll keep their mouths shut._

Jeff's smile hasn't dimmed a bit, "So... what **exactly** did we walk in on?"

Sebastian glares, "The process of me getting laid. Seriously, if I wanted someone to cockblock me, we'd have waited til we got back to his house."

Kurt elbows Sebastian, "Will you shut up? Don't give out more details. Maybe they would have believed we were just making out!"

Jeff cuts in with, "No, we wouldn't!" and Nick snorts disbelievingly.

Sebastian just raises an eyebrow, "Do think anyone that's ever met you would believe you let me throw your clothes on the floor just to make out?"

Kurt shrugs, "Okay, point. Anyway... Hi, Jeff! Hi, Nick!"

Jeff giggles, "Hey, Kurt! So I hear you and Sebastian are just friends. And that you totally weren't being molested while we talked on the phone last week. Somehow, I think I've been lied to." Nick chuckles, pressing his face to Jeff's neck.

Kurt blushes, "Actually, this is a recent development. When you were told that, we probably **were** just friends."

Jeff smiles widely, "And now you're...?"

Sebastian cuts in, "Fucking."

Nick looks up, "Wait, what? You guys aren't dating?"

While Kurt just furrows his brows, trying to think of how to explain the whole New York thing, Sebastian says, "Hi! I'm Sebastian. Have we met?"

Kurt turns to him, smacking him again, "Wow. You have all the tact of a craigslist ad."

Sebastian just scowls, "Okay, Peach, you have to stop with the craigslist thing. I'd be worth a bit more than a used futon with a mysterious stain."

Kurt considers this for a second, "Fine, you can throw in a set of Ginsu Knives."

Sebastian goes to respond but is interrupted by laughter. "Oh, no. You're right. You guys aren't dating. You're **married**."

Sebastian just glares. Kurt says, "Shut up, Jeff." before getting up. "Well, since we can't get naked, let's get this moving. Maybe Finn will be asleep when we get home."

That perks Sebastian up, "Right. We just need to get these boxes and those bags down to your truck. The cockblockers can help." Nick and Kurt grab the lightest bags they can and run off before they can be called out on it. Laughing, Sebastian mutters, "Assholes."

Jeff glances at Sebastian before grabbing a heavy box and leading him down the stairs. "So... you guys really aren't dating? Just messing around?"

"Are you really surprised? It's **me** , Jeff. I don't date. Hell, I hardly ever call someone after they've opened their legs." Sebastian tries very hard not to think about how hurt he'd been when Kurt had made a similar statement. _I could date if I wanted. If it was_ _ **worth**_ _it. Right?_

"No, I get that, you're a manwhore. But Kurt isn't. He's definitely the red roses, French food, dancing, fourth date kinda guy." Jeff glances around, making sure no one is listening.

Sebastian smirks, "Apparently, not so much. I didn't even have to talk him into it. I pretty much just jumped him and he went with it."

Jeff gives him a wary look. "You **do** realize that means he probably already has feelings for you, right?"

That stops Sebastian in his tracks. After a few seconds, he says "Nope. I'm at least 90% sure that's not it. He's probably just horny. He's a guy fresh out of a relationship where he got some, regularly, by all accounts. I'm happy to fill the void." He gives a very obvious and overdone wink.

Jeff laughs, "Oh em gee. I hope Kurt hears you refer to his ass as a void. I'd love to watch him take you apart inch by inch."

Sebastian looks over at him, "Don't you mean piece by piece?"

Jeff gets an evil smile, "Nope. Inch by inch. Because I know exactly where he'd start."

Quickly catching on, Seb winces, awkwardly trying to protect his crotch from the conversation. "Okay. Not all your points are bad ones. I'll try to watch the innuendos."

"Here's a pro-tip. It's easier to watch other things if you can take your eyes off his ass."

* * *

 

When Sebastian follows Kurt into the Hudmel home, he's disgruntled to find Finn sitting on the couch playing Xbox. He can hear other guys strategizing through the TV. Finn glances over at them, "Hey, dudes. Seb, wanna play?"

Sebastian frowns, "No thanks, you have fun. I'm going to start taking crap upstairs."

When Kurt just smiles at him and goes into the kitchen, Sebastian huffs and starts unloading the car. As he grabs the last load, he walks into the house to find Kurt holding a bottle of water and leaning over Finn's shoulder to talk into his microphone. "No, Noah! Bas and I need to talk about something that happened when we were getting his stuff from school. You can wait until tonight."

When Puck starts to respond with, "Dammit, Princess! What the hell is so importan-" Kurt cuts him off.

"Noah! Do you want to sleep on the couch? Or maybe you should just stay home?" Sebastian smiles to himself, taking a minute to stare at Kurt's ass while he's bent over the back of Finn's chair. Snapping out of it, he walks up the stairs, only vaguely listening to the calls of other gamers.

"Aw man, your girl has you whipped, dude."

"Lawl. Someone's not gettin' any tonight."

"Hold up! Are you fuckin his sister? That's not cool at all ' **Noah** '."

"Unless she's hot. Is she hot?"

Seb throws the box down, pulling out his phone to text Kurt. As he's typing, telling him to hurry the fuck up, Sebastian gets a better idea.

Within seconds of sending the picture, Sebastian hears Kurt running up the stairs, screaming, "I mean it, Finn! Keep him busy!"

Kurt barely makes it through the door before a naked Sebastian is pinning him against it, kissing him. When Sebastian moves down to his neck, Kurt takes the opportunity to lock the door and say, "As much as I appreciate you skipping steps by being naked when I come in, please don't send me dick pix in front of my brother. If it was anyone else they'd have no trouble guessing what we're doing."

"Don't care. It's Finn. We're fine. Take your fucking clothes off, Peach." Sebastian whips the sweater back off of Kurt and goes to attack the tie. Kurt stops him.

"Oh no. **You** created the problem in my skinny jeans, you get to work them off around it. I'll take care of the top half." Kurt manages to take off the tie and dress shirt long before Sebastian can figure out the pants. Still pressed against the door, Kurt runs his hands through Sebastian's hair, pulling lightly. He leans up to groan into his ear, "Bas... god, hurry."

"Guh! Do you really think that's **helping**?"

Kurt just smirks. Eventually he huffs, slaps Seb's hand away, and pulls the jeans down himself. Sebastian, looking down to find nothing but bare skin, moans, "Jesus fucking Christ, Hummel."

Giggling, Kurt says, "Sorry. Some of my pants are too tight for underwear. I figured you wouldn't mind."

Sebastian just grabs Kurt by the arm, turning him and pressing him down, face first, against the bed. As Sebastian starts to lick and suck at the nape of his neck, Kurt moans out, "Isn't it my turn to top?"

Scoffing, Sebastian runs his hands down Kurt's back, holding him by the hips and rubbing his erection along Kurt's crack. "No way, Peach. You got to have your way the first time, you got the first blowjob in the shower, it's definitely my turn. And what I want is to bend you over this bed." As Sebastian makes his way down Kurt's back, leaving bite marks and hickeys in his wake, Kurt whimpers, pushing his ass back, seeking contact.

Kurt pants out, "More than glad to comply, just please god, hurry the fuck up."

Chuckling, Seb reaches down further, grabbing Kurt's ass and holding him open long enough for Sebastian to lean down and blow cold air on his twitching hole. Kurt whines and Sebastian leans back up to whisper, "So, if you had a problem with fingers, I'm guessing rimming is out of the question, right?"

Kurt presses his face down into the bed, clearly trying to hide his red face. Sebastian moves his hands closer together, rubbing his thumbs over Kurt's entrance, lightly massaging it, waiting on a response.

When Kurt does lean back up and glance over his shoulder, Sebastian is mildly shocked to find no embarrassment, just lust darkened eyes. "I'd love that some other day when I have more patience. But I swear to god, Bas, if you don't get on with it, I'll get my dildo, and do it myself."

Eyes narrowed at the threat of using Blaine's dick instead of his own, Sebastian grabs the condom and lube he'd thrown on the bed after stripping. Quickly lubing his fingers, without warning, he pushes two fingers inside Kurt. He'd expected cussing and swearing, or at the very least a glare. Instead he gets a keen and Kurt pressing back against him harder.

As Sebastian starts to spread his fingers and thinks about just adding a third right away, Kurt moans out, "No, no more, just do it." Still unused to the idea, Sebastian hesitates, worried that Kurt isn't used to his considerably bigger dick. He snaps out of it when Kurt adopts his best bitchface and says "Unless you can't handle that, Sebby. You can always sit back and watch while I do it mys-"

Growling, Sebastian pulls away from Kurt. Seb grabs the condom, putting it on and lubing it up in record time. Before Kurt can do more than smirk at him, Sebastian pushes the back of his neck down onto the bed, using his other hand to guide his cock to Kurt's ass.

Sebastian spends much longer teasing than Kurt had. He pushes in only a centimeter the first time, before pulling out, taking much longer to push at Kurt's hole again. After about five teasing slides, Sebastian starts to push just the head in and out of Kurt, pinning him down to where he can't move. When he pulls away completely again, Kurt finally breaks. "Oh god, Bas! I'm sorry, I'll shut up, I promise, just... please!"

Sebastian smirks and leans down in Kurt's ear again, biting the lobe, "Please what, baby?" He picks that moment to push just the head back in, still refusing to go deeper.

"F-fuck! Fuck me! Jesus, come on, fuck me, already!"

"Well, Peach, since you asked so sweetly." Without another word of warning, Sebastian pushes all the way inside, not stopping until his balls rest against Kurt's. Kurt shudders, grabbing at the duvet he's pressed against, groaning loudly.

Remembering that Finn is still downstairs, Sebastian reaches his clean hand around, pressing two fingers to Kurt's lips. "Here, babe. You've got to stay quiet, and unless you want me to pull out so I can grab your tie..."

The threat works, Kurt immediately opening his mouth so Sebastian can shove his fingers inside, muffling Kurt's moans a little. Hoping that Kurt has had enough time to adjust, Sebastian pulls out about half way before pressing back inside. "Oh jesus, Kurt. So tight..."

When the only response he gets is a moan and sucking on his fingers, Sebastian starts thrusting. Quickly settling on a fast, hard pace. Sebastian pulls his fingers away so he can grab Kurt's hips for leverage.

_Fuck it. Finn should still be listening to nothing but bitching gamers._ Kurt pushes his face down into the bed, slamming his hips back as much as he's able to, still mostly pinned. He eventually untwists a hand from the blanket, reaching down to his own cock. The only thing he's really able to do is wrap his fingers around it, not having enough room to move.

Feeling himself getting close, Sebastian shifts, quickly finding the perfect angle to make Kurt buck against him, moaning, "There! Yeah... guuuh!"

Sebastian slams into him repeatedly, one hand on Kurt's hip, the other holding his shoulder so he can pull him down to meet his thrusts. When Kurt gasps out a breathy "Oh god! Bas! C-close!", Seb is caught off guard, coming suddenly. While continuing to pump himself into Kurt as he rides out his orgasm, Sebastian grunts out Kurt's name. After a few seconds to recover, Sebastian pulls out of Kurt, flipping him over.

Without warning, Seb leans down and swallows as much of Kurt's cock as he can. Before Kurt can do more than gasp out "Bas!", Sebastian shoves his two fingers back inside, quickly finding and abusing Kurt's prostate again. Sebastian watches as Kurt throws an arm up, biting hard into his own wrist to keep from screaming as he comes down Sebastian's throat. Fingers still rubbing inside, Sebastian swallows until he's sure Kurt is done, before pulling away completely.

After disposing of the condom, Seb flops down, face first beside Kurt. Smiling over at him, Sebastian asks, "So... feel better now?"

Giggling, Kurt turns onto his side, pressing against Sebastian and wrapping an arm around his waist. "God, yeah. Feel free to push me down on whatever surfaces you want."

Sebastian smirks and leans in, kissing Kurt. What was meant to be a quick, Thanks-for-the-orgasm!, turns into a much deeper make out session. Sebastian has one hand on Kurt's ass, and his tongue down Kurt's throat when he hears the bathroom door open. Kurt almost starts screaming before he even looks. _Seriously?! Why can't I ever kiss this boy without someone showing up to interrupt us?!_ Pretty soon though, he remembers what they were doing no less than ten minutes ago. _Okay. It could be worse. At least we aren't_ _ **actually**_ _fucking right now._

Finally looking behind him to where a shocked and horrified Finn should be, Kurt himself is horrified to see a smug Noah Puckerman.

"God **damn** it, Noah! What are you doing here?! I told you to come later! Much, **much** later!" Kurt glares at him, making a hand gesture, telling him to turn around.

As soon as he's faced away, Kurt jumps up and grabs Sebastian's short sleeved, dark blue button up shirt off the ground, throwing the underwear to him. Knowing he won't have enough time for them to actually dress, Kurt sits back on the bed. He moves between Sebastian's legs, trying to help cover up what the underwear **doesn't** very well. After tucking the shirt in around him as much as he can, Kurt says, "Okay, Noah. Seriously, why are you here already? Finn was supposed to distract you."

Noah just grins, "Well, that's the problem, Princess! That plan worked great, until Finn got hungry. Then he said, 'Hey dudes, I'm gonna make a sandwich. Puck, see ya around six, that's when Kurt said you're allowed over.' and then he logged off."

Kurt was too busy planning Finn Hudson's demise to notice the looks Noah was giving him. Sebastian isn't. "Hey! Eyes up, mohawk."

Kurt glances up just in time to see Noah give him a smirk, "I can't help it, he's sitting there in nothing but a too-big shirt. Tell me you wouldn't be checking him out."

Kurt huffs, "It's not like you haven't seen this before, Noah." When he gets a nudge from Sebastian, he turns to see a raised eyebrow. Realizing what he just implied, Kurt flushed. "Ah! No! Not that. Over the past few months, he's seen everything but what a speedo would cover. The sight of me in a too-large shirt should be no big deal."

"Except this time I know there's nothing under it, Princess. Trust me. It's different." Noah says, crossing his arms like he's about to start the inquisition.

Before he can, Sebastian asks, "Actually, what's up with you stealing shirts? When I first got here it was Puck's, now you're stealing mine. What gives?"

Kurt fidgets, tugging the shirt down to cover him better, "I wear skin tight clothes pretty much all day every day. When I'm at home I like to wear baggier stuff. Why buy them when I can just ninja shirts from you guys? And for the record, before Noah, it was Finn. But Finn doesn't wash his clothes enough, he couldn't spare them. And Noah never cared as long as I bought him new stuff when I took too many. With you, honestly, you started it."

Sebastian cocks an eyebrow again, "Uh, how exactly did I start it?"

Kurt smiles innocently, "By putting that sweater on me the night before the wars started."

Sebastian sputters, "That was to help you get warm! And by the way, I still haven't gotten that back."

Noah laughs, "And you won't. The only way you'll see that thing again is if you're peeling it off him." Noah straightens, "Oh yeah, that reminds me." He turns to Kurt, smirking again, "When did he give it up?"

Kurt groans, leaning back on Sebastian, "Shut up, Noah."

Instead of listening, he just says, "Well, I know it has to have been since the party. Ya know, when you told me there was no way he'd be interested in fucking you. Or has he somehow escaped from the basement?"

When Sebastian looks at him questioningly, Kurt just stands up. "Nope. I'm not having this conversation. I'm going to go take my shower, maybe a bath. Tell him whatever you want, Sebastian." As he walks away, Kurt stops suddenly, turning back to face the bed. "Tell him whatever you want that's **true** , Sebastian."

Seeing his crestfallen look, Kurt just smiles and shuts the bathroom door behind him, locking it.

* * *

 

After a long soak, Kurt comes down the stairs to see Sebastian on one end of the couch and Noah on the other. With a slight smile, Kurt sits between them. For long minutes, they seem to not react. Then Kurt realizes that the Halo match they are playing is getting more and more vicious as time goes on. When Noah finally ends the game by driving over Sebastian with a warthog, Kurt snorts.

Noah fist pumps and grabs Kurt's arm, pulling him closer. "Ha! In your face, Craigslist! Princess is mine!"

Kurt sputters, looking back and forth between Sebastian and Noah. "What?! Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Fine, you win, grease monkey. You get Kurt's bed, I'll sleep on the roll-away." Sebastian sighs.

Kurt glares at him, "Oh really, Meerkat? Don't you think **I** should get to pick who sleeps in my bed?"

"Nope. I won. My turn. If I'd lost I'd have slept in the rolly thing in Finn's room." When he sees Kurt and Sebastian sharing a look, Noah says, "What?"

Kurt just laughs, "You didn't tell him?"

Sebastian shrugs, standing up and stretching. "This seemed more fun. I'm gonna go take a shower."

Kurt catches himself staring at Seb's ass as he walks away.

_Definitely my turn next time._


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is weird, and a lot like the end will be. If the way its written annoys you, stop after the 19th chapter. The Epilogue is way worse. -_-

The next two months pass surprisingly quickly. Sebastian breaks down and tells Puck that he won't be kicking him out of Kurt's bed, as long as he doesn't stay every night. After the third time that Puck comes over, half-expecting a fight, only to have Sebastian kiss Kurt on the cheek before crawling into his own bed at night, Puck accepts that he really is going to be cool about it.

Puck is actually pretty confused by the 'non-relationship' that Kurt and Sebastian have going. They insist they aren't dating, yet they spend a bit too much time curled up together watching tv, playing video games, or whatever. They kiss, go to the movies on Kurt's night off, and eat dinner together every night. Not to mention they fuck like rabbits. Eventually even Puck has to concede to knocking on the door before coming in, soon learning that no time of the day or night is safe. And it really sucks having to deal with your own boners knowing sex is going on that you aren't allowed to watch.

Most of the dating-type-things that are going on are due to them living together, but even that is a little strange. In the middle of June, Finn leaves for basic training. With Sam and Finn both gone, Burt tells Sebastian he can move into their room. Sebastian manages to convince him that he doesn't want to move all his stuff. After a brief talk with Kurt, making sure it's okay with him, Burt let's it go, but he's still slightly confused. He does shrug it off after walking in to Finn's room to find a mysterious smell that he can't find or get rid of.

As the summer goes on, Burt and Carole spend more and more time in D.C., relieved that Puck has taken over the shop almost completely. Noah, for his part, loves working for Burt. It's like owning his own business without having to take the risk. As a mechanic, Puck is making more than anyone else he knows his age. Thanks to being paid for actually running the shop, not just fixing the cars, and the fact that he still lives at home, by the end of the summer, he should have quite a large savings account already. Kurt laid the smack down early about him blowing his money on stupid stuff.

Kurt spends the summer talking to Rachel near constantly about New York. He'd actually started telling her he was picking up extra shifts at the Lima Bean just so he could get time alone with Sebastian without her calling. It's not until the second week of the summer that Kurt realizes that Sebastian's resentment of his 'toy' is based on the fact that Sebastian thinks he's kept Blaine's 'willy'. After laughing himself to tears, Kurt shows Sebastian the new dildo, and promptly gets attacked. Sebastian shows his appreciation of common sense with a very enthusiastic blowjob. Neither realizes how strange Sebastian's relief is, considering they aren't dating.

In the two weeks before Finn's departure, the wars had backed off to almost-truce. There were still the occasional flare ups, usually at the fault of Finn. The most memorable attacks had been a baby monitor, placed under a towel and turned up loud. When Finn had screamed into the microphone, Kurt had shrieked so loudly you could hear him almost a block away. He'd also damn near fallen. In retaliation, Kurt had replaced the toothpaste with hot sauce laced cake icing. There was also a pressurized glitter bomb in the medicine cabinet and Puck still wouldn't tell how he'd done it. Sebastian's only real contribution had been after a nasty lacrosse practice, when all he'd wanted was to soak his back, and he'd come home to find the entire shower/tub covered three layers deep with post-its. When no one would own up to the prank, Sebastian had spent two days at his own house, not talking to anyone.

On the second day, Kurt had showed up, near in tears from laughter. The ice sculpture of a middle finger, that Sebastian had paid three **very** burly men to put in the bathroom, was so big that it took up the entire shower and was still only about a third of the way melted. By the time Finn realized he'd have to melt it himself, the hot water had been running in the sink all day. When Kurt had left, he'd been swearing and running up the stairs with a hair dryer.

That was also the day Sebastian and Kurt realized that they had a full house to themselves there, with no interruptions. They made use of the house about once a week after that. Kurt insisted it wasn't just because he had a full luxury bath to himself. Sebastian didn't believe him.

One thing that no one had really seen coming was that David and Blaine would start dating. Shortly after Finn left, Kurt had dropped by David's house to help him with ideas for Father's Day, only to be asked question after question about Blaine. Eventually, Kurt had just come out and asked him if they were dating. After a long discussion about 'the bro code', in which Kurt had told David he was being stupid, Dave finally agreed to go for it. Within a few days, Kurt got a gushing phone call from Blaine, telling him about the date he had coming up that weekend.

The only person who was really put out by the match was Paul. David's father had been under the impression that now that Kurt had broken up with his boyfriend, Dave would finally settle down with him. David and Kurt had known for months that Paul loved Kurt, and hoped that he and David would one day be together. When Kurt had tried to point out that as Blaine's ex-boyfriend, he could assure Paul that he was a really nice guy, it had backfired. Paul said Blaine must have been stupid to let Kurt go. Realizing that any help offered would make things worse, Kurt had bowed out, and left David and Blaine to their fate.

In late July, Kurt had gotten a call from Sam telling him that his family was moving back to Lima. They'd been wondering for awhile what Sam would do next year. With Finn and Kurt gone, Sam could have come back to stay with Burt and Carole, but it would have been awkward. And lonely with them out of town so often. Luckily Sam's dad had managed to get a new job close to Lima and they'd been saving up so they could move back.

Sebastian had spent most of his summer playing games on Live with Puck and playing lacrosse. The commute back and forth was annoying, but luckily he wasn't the only one fighting it. The captain of the team understood the problems people were having and scheduled practices for two days in a row when possible. He also let those that had too far to drive crash at his house the night between, since Dalton wasn't open to partial-boarders. You either stayed or you didn't. Noah used those nights away as extra cuddle time, so it all worked out.

* * *

 

[Kurt]

The only real problem that Kurt could see was that summer was ending. As the beginning of August loomed up in front of him, Kurt started to panic. In one month, he'd leave. He had decided the night his NYADA letter came that he would go to New York in September. He'd saved money all summer, packed most of his stuff up, and mentally prepared himself to leave all of his friends and family. After all, he was supposed to already be gone. The letter had just bought him the summer.

What he hadn't planned on was Sebastian Smythe. When he'd first started sleeping with him, he'd figured it was only physical. Sebastian was hot, and a really great fuck. So he'd spend the summer with a friend, getting as much sex as he could before he went off to a whole new life and world in New York. He knew he wouldn't be able to date for months, too busy with getting settled. He figured he wouldn't want to date anyone, wouldn't want the attention being pulled away from all the excitement. He'd been wrong.

As time wore on, Kurt found himself spending more time cuddling into Sebastian and kissing him when he left for work. He made dinners that he knew Sebastian liked, and learned any recipes he didn't already know. On lacrosse days, he got used to waking up early, just to make him his coffee order before he had to leave. He got used to falling asleep with him at night, and waking up with him in the morning. Before long, Kurt noticed that even when he slept beside Noah, he missed Sebastian.

As time went on, Noah started to watch him. The first Tuesday in August, Noah walked in to see Kurt curled up in the sweater he'd stolen from Sebastian, worrying his lip and he'd asked, "Are you in love with him?" Kurt had blinked up at him for a few seconds before slowly nodding, tears starting to fall down his face. Noah had just smiled sadly at him and curled up behind him on the bed, spooning him. "Does he know?"

Kurt had scoffed, swiping the tears off his cheeks, "Of course not. There isn't a Smythe shaped hole in my door, is there?" Noah hadn't responded, just held Kurt tighter. Personally, Noah thought Seb might love him back, but he wasn't about to say so. If he was wrong, the last thing Kurt needed was false hope.

So Noah sat back, and waited. He hoped that Sebastian would be man enough to either face his feelings, if he had them, or let Kurt down easy, if he didn't. And if Sebastian wasn't man enough, Noah hoped he'd be around to kick his ass for it.

Not knowing what else to do, Kurt decided to bury it; hide his feelings away in his own mental memorabilia trunk and try to forget they exist. It was his own problem. They'd made no secrets of what they were doing. They weren't dating. Sebastian wouldn't fall in love with him. The fact that they became friends still amazed Kurt, expecting more would be ridiculous. So Kurt continued to sleep with Sebastian, trying to prepare himself for the day when he wouldn't be there anymore. He just hoped he'd survive it when that day came.

* * *

 

The second week of August, on Thursday, Kurt and Sebastian had decided to spend the day at Seb's house. They actually hadn't stayed there in awhile, because Burt and Carole had been gone for almost three weeks straight. They hadn't needed to come here for privacy. Until now.

Sebastian was confused, and Kurt was slightly angry. Noah had been stopping by almost every night. Kurt realized he was trying to get a sense for how Sebastian felt, and trying to protect him, but really, he just wishes he would butt out.

So that night, after Kurt gets off work, he drives straight to Seb's house. He can't decide if he wants to take a shower before or after he hunts Sebastian down. Sebastian takes that choice out of his hands. When Kurt walks in the front door, he drops his keys and phone on the table by the door, and looks up to find Seb spread out in an armchair, legs over the arms, thrusting Kurt's dildo into his ass.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Bas. You're completely insatiable aren't you? For fuck's sake, I'm still sore from last night, and you're **this** horny?" Despite Kurt's words, he's already managed to shed his shirt and is now working on the pants. Luckily they are actually fairly loose fitted, since they're for work.

"I don't hear you complaining, do I? Clearly, I'm good right here. You can just go on and take your shower if you're **that** bothered." How Sebastian has said all that without slowing his thrusts with the toy, Kurt will never know. Kurt can barely think when he's being fucked, so Sebastian remaining his snarky, asshole self, will always be amazing to him.

Kurt snorts, having divested himself of his clothes, he leans in to kiss Sebastian. He reaches one hand down, teasing his fingers around Sebastian's hole where it's stretched by the toy. "We both know good and well that if I try to leave this room I'll be attacked before I make the stairs. Not that I'm planning to try."

Kurt reaches down, slapping Seb's hand away and pushing the dildo up against Seb's prostate and rubbing it there a few times before asking, "Where's the condom?"

As Sebastian fumbles it from the table, ripping it open and reaching out to put it on Kurt's cock, Kurt pulls the dildo out, dropping it on the hardwood floor. Sebastian glares at him slightly, "Awesome, now there's lube on the floor. You're cleaning that up."

Kurt just smiles cheekily, pushing one finger into Sebastian, hooking it just enough to press against his prostate again. "If you say so, Bas."

Leaning back, Kurt grabs the lube from the table, smearing his condom-covered length. Kurt leans down over Sebastian to kiss him again, barely nudging Seb's ass with his cock.

Sebastian groans, clearly way past the point of teasing. "Come on, Peach. Fuck me. If I wanted to mess around I'd have waited for you to get here."

Laughing quietly, Kurt pushes inside him a couple inches. Giving them both a second to adjust, Kurt leans back in, kissing down Sebastian's neck, sucking and licking down his chest. When Sebastian pulls Kurt's head up by his hair, growling to 'come the fuck on, already!' Kurt laughs and finally starts moving. Starting off slow, more to annoy Sebastian than anything, Kurt smirks when Seb huffs, trying to scoot himself down in the chair for a better angle.

It's not until Kurt starts giggling that Sebastian clamps down on him in retaliation, raking his fingernails down Kurt's back. Making a gurgling sound, Kurt relents, "Okay, okay!" Kurt presses Seb's knees back against the arms of the chair as he starts to ram into him.

Sebastian's strangled, "Oh god, yeah!" and loud moans are his only response. Kurt grabs the back of the chair, slamming into Sebastian harder, making him grunt and hold Kurt by the back of the neck, trying to pull him in closer.

As Kurt starts to feel himself getting close, he shifts his angle, pressing up, and grabs Sebastian's cock at the same time. The dual feeling of his prostate finally getting hit, along with his dick being squeezed tightly in a slick, fast moving fist, pushes Sebastian over the edge. Sebastian grunting out, "K-kurt! Fuck!" and clamping down on him again, causes Kurt to see stars, coming so hard that he almost loses his footing.

When the shudders subside, Kurt pulls out and just drops down on the floor. Sebastian laughs at him, "Damn. I wish I had my phone. That picture would be a total screen saver."

Kurt grunts and wiggles his foot, like he's trying to kick Sebastian, but can't quite force himself to move. "Shut up, Smirky." After a second to catch his breath, he says, "If I didn't get to take a picture of the scene I walked in on half an hour ago, you don't get this one."

Sebastian winks, "I never said you couldn't take a picture."

Kurt just laughs, sitting up and pulling off the condom. "Ugh. I need a shower. I can't believe you let me fuck you smelling like stale coffee and biscotti."

"You've smelled worse. At least you aren't coming from the garage." Sebastian shrugs, unconcerned. Then his stomach rumbles. "Alright! I'm starving. I'm going to order chinese, go hop in the shower, I'll be there in a sec."

Kurt nods, heading up the stairs, still naked. He calls back, "Get me an extra egg roll and a fortune cookie! I feel lucky today!" Kurt turns back to wink at him before he turns the corner.

* * *

 

As Kurt rubs lotion into his arms, he wonders what's taking the food so long. He should have heard the doorbell by now. Slipping on the black, baggy sweatpants and white henley shirt that Sebastian had left him, Kurt smiles to himself. _Thank god_ _ **these**_ _have a tie. I swear he just likes easy access... I didn't think Sebastian was this much bigger than me until I started wearing his pants. I should at least bring over sleepwear..._

After making sure his hair would dry okay, Kurt picked his way down the stairs, humming to himself. He's only half way down when the doorbell rings. "I got it! But you know I don't have cash on me!"

He darts over and pulls open the door, "What took so long? You'll have to wait a sec, I can't pay-" Kurt cuts himself off. Instead of the harassed looking teenager holding a bag of food that he'd expected, there's an elegant looking bottle-blonde in her 40's standing on the doorstep. When all Kurt does is blink at her, the woman finally speaks up,

"Um, hi! Is Steph or Bastian here?"

Kurt panics, not knowing what to say. They weren't even supposed to be there, he didn't want to get Sebastian in trouble with his dad, and he had no clue who this woman was.

Before he can recover, Sebastian walks up behind him, wearing only a pair of track pants and counting out money. "Hey babe, go ahead and take the food-" Kurt coughs, trying to warn him. When Sebastian finally sees the woman, all the color in his face drains. Kurt doesn't know what to do, so he just shifts from foot to foot. After several long minutes of awkward silence, Sebastian says, "Mère... what are you doing here?"

_What?!_

* * *

 

As Kurt glances back and forth between them, he can't really spot any similarities between them. Different color eyes, hair, even Sebastian's skin is slightly more tan. _Well, her hair is dyed, and it is summer, maybe she hasn't been outside?_

Realizing that he's focusing on all the wrong things, Kurt starts to really freak out. _Oh my god! That's his mother! He hasn't said anything about her! I figured she was out of the picture... not that they look close, just standing there avoiding eye contact... What do I do?_

Eventually he settles for raising his eyebrow at Sebastian, nodding his head toward her. _Win, lose, or draw, let's get this moving. The standing around is killing me._

Sebastian finally fixes his glare at her shoes, refusing to look her in the face. "What do you want, Mère?"

She runs a hand over her hair, tucking her purse tighter into the crook of her elbow. "I've been trying to get in touch with you or Stephan for weeks, no one is ever here."

"He's in Paris with Grand-mère, I've been staying with a friend, what do you **want**?" Sebastian's face is like stone, his voice not much better. Kurt has never heard it sound this dead before.

"I... um. I wanted to see how you're doing. I haven't seen you in years, Bastian. I've missed you! Is... is this your boyfriend?" She looks at Kurt questioningly.

With a jolt, Kurt realizes how rude he's been. Before he can introduce himself though, Sebastian cuts him off. Speaking in French, he says, **"Not that it's any of your business, but no! He's not. And could you please not talk about personal stuff in front of people you don't even know? I haven't told him about you, nor do I plan to. What the ever loving hell could you want from us now? After all this time?"**

The woman, and Kurt can't believe he doesn't even know her name, flinches and says, **"It's rude to speak a different language in front of others, Bassy. I thought I raised you better than that?"**

That seems to enrage him enough that all of Sebastian's filters fall away. **"** _ **Raised me**_ **?! You didn't raise me! You haven't even** _ **seen**_ **me in over five years! You don't get to show up when I'm about to start my senior year in high school, and pretend you've been a mother to me. I don't know why you're back here, but if it's to 'reconnect' with me or whatever, I'm not interested."**

Tearing up, his mother says, **"Bastian, I'm so sorry. I never should have taken his side. You know that I never cared, have never been bothered by your sexuality. I accepted you-"**

" **Oh,** ** _right!_** **While it was convenient! But as soon as that asshole you were with decided I was disgusting, who did you side with? You kicked me out and cut me off and now you expect for me to** ** _forgive you_** **? Are you fucking kidding me?!"**

Kurt had heard enough, suddenly realizing what was going on, and what this woman had done, Kurt snapped, **"** _ **What?!**_ **You let some** _ **guy**_ **tell you how to feel about your own son and now have the nerve,** _ **five fucking years later**_ **, to turn up and pretend to be his mother?! What kind of person are you?!"**

It's not until he notices that Sebastian is staring at him in shock that Kurt realizes what he just did. Kurt bites his lip and looks down at the floor, expecting Sebastian to turn his fury on him. Instead he's surprised when Sebastian says, "Mère, get the fuck off my porch. Actually, get the hell out of my state, out of my country. You always hated America. Well, now you have no reason to come here. As you pointed out years ago, you don't have a son anymore."

Sebastian slams the door in her face and then stomps away, into the living room. Kurt stays by the door, watching as she wipes her eyes and goes back to what is clearly a rental car. Kurt doesn't know how he feels about the fact that he has no sympathy for a woman in tears. _How horrible of a person do you have to be to pick a_ _ **man**_ _over your own son? Jesus. No wonder he was so mean. I'd be a colossal douchebag too._

He's never appreciated Burt Hummel more than he does in that moment.

After making sure that the woman leaves, Kurt turns to follow Sebastian into the living room. Kurt has to bite his lip to keep himself from giggling. _Oh god. She could see all of this couldn't she?_ The room is littered with their clothes. Sebastian's are clearly displayed in a pile right beside the chair, Kurt's work clothes thrown all over. The dildo is still on the floor in a small puddle of lube, the condom is at the top of the trashcan, in clear view.

When Kurt turns to Sebastian to point all this out to him, he's shocked to find him already watching him. Glaring at him, his arms crossed over his chest. _Shit. I forgot..._

Wincing, Kurt says, "Okay, so... I probably should have told you. I speak French. Schools require language courses and I loved it, so I spent most of my summer after freshman year learning to speak it fluently. I breezed through the more advanced courses..." Kurt trails off, seeing no shift in Sebastian's stance or glare. "I'm sorry! It's not like I **purposely** didn't tell you! The only times you've spoken French around me was when you were talking to your grandmother, just now, and once when I was still pissed off about the basket thing! I didn't think I owed you anything then, and I couldn't interrupt you when you were talking to family, it would be rude!"

"Oh, but eavesdropping onto conversations that I thought were private, **that** was okay?!" Sebastian snaps.

Kurt shifts from foot to foot, "No, but I didn't want to interrupt your screaming matches. Honestly, it's not like I heard anything outrageous! I just found out about your grandmother a few minutes before you told me, and now about your mom. I would never hold either of those things against you! We're friends! Is it really that big of a deal that I heard?"

As Kurt watches Sebastian, he sees a small flash of pain in his eyes. It's gone so quickly that Kurt has trouble wondering if he imagined it. When he makes no move to respond, Kurt walks up to Sebastian, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. "I'm so sorry, Bas. I had no idea about your mom."

Sebastian finally moves his arms, using them to push Kurt off of him. He seems to have snapped again. "Of course you didn't! I didn't **want** you to! I don't talk about her, ever. And certainly not with **you**!"

Kurt flinches, this time wrapping his arms around himself, "I'm sorr-"

Sebastian cuts him off, sneering, "Stop saying you're sorry! Clearly you weren't **that** sorry. I have trouble believing that you just **forgot** you knew another language! You were just fucking with me-"

" **No**! I really didn't think about it! I never speak it-!"

"Shut up! I don't care! You listened to me fighting with Grand-mère! You knew! This whole time you've **known**! And now you're playing innocent! Well, fuck that!"

"Bas, sweetie, I have no idea what you're talking ab-"

"Stop fucking calling me that! Stop acting like my fucking boyfriend! We aren't dating! You were a nice fuck while it lasted, but that's all we were. Fuck. I never asked for this shit. I didn't want you poking your nose into my bullshit family drama. I sure as fuck don't want **you** of all goddamned people to comfort me over it. Jesus." Sebastian runs a hand through his hair, looking like he wants to just pull it out by the roots.

Kurt can feel tears forming, and tries to push them back. _I knew that's how it was... I've told myself over and over, 'Don't get attached. Don't fall in love. He won't love you back.' I didn't even have to tell him, he just knows. Now it's too late._

Kurt finally manages to choke back tears enough to say, "I know, I'm sorry."

Sebastian sneers again, "I don't want to hear it, Gay Face. Even **your** ass isn't worth this much fucking effort. Just leave me the fuck alone."

When Kurt sees Sebastian stomp off, he has to catch himself on the back of the couch. After a few seconds, his knees firm up enough that he can walk. In a daze, he heads for the door. Luckily his phone is laying with his keys or there's no way he'd have remembered to grab it.

As he climbs into the navigator, Kurt wipes his eyes. _I have to get out of here. I know I'm going to cry, but I can't do it in the fucking driveway. I have to get out._ As he's pulling out of the drive, the chinese delivery finally gets there. Kurt sniffs, _And I thought I was_ _ **lucky**_ _._

Kurt makes it to a gas station a few miles down the road and pulls over. As soon as the truck is in park, the tears flow and can't be stopped. He thumbs his phone open, calling Noah.

"Hummel Tires and Lube."

"N-noah? Can you come g-get me?"

"Princess? What's wrong?!" Kurt can vaguely hear yelling in the background, Noah telling someone to take over, that he has an emergency, and to call Kurt's cell if anyone needs him. Kurt just waits until he can hear Noah unzipping his coveralls before saying,

"S-sebastian doesn't want me a-anymore. I f-fucked up. I can't see the r-road and I'm afraid to drive. B-but I can't stay here. I'm at the Sh-shell station by his house. Come drive me h-home?"

"I'll be there in ten minutes, babe, just hold on."

As Kurt folds in on himself in the seat, staring at his disconnected phone, more tears slip down his face. His background picture is of Sebastian, fist pumping, holding his lacrosse stick after he'd made a goal. Kurt had driven two hours just to watch his game. He'd never even told Sebastian he was there, afraid he'd guess Kurt's feelings. He'd just wanted to see him play.

_How did I let this happen?_

* * *

 

Kurt spends the whole night curled up, sobbing quietly, on Noah's chest. He'd told him as much as he could, and hadn't spoken since. The next day, Noah calls in sick for him at work. After making sure Kurt is as comfortable as he can be, he has to go to the garage. He tells Kurt to call him if he needs anything, and that he'll be back at 4.

When he comes back, Kurt seemingly hasn't moved. He's not crying anymore, but there are dried tracks on his face. Noah sighs heavily, setting aside the dinner he'd called-in from Breadstix. He leans down to kiss Kurt on the temple. After pulling him up to standing, Noah pushes him forward gently, into the bathroom, telling him to wash his face and brush his teeth.

Noah has to direct Kurt to eat, to bathe, and finally to sleep. As more time goes by and Kurt doesn't snap out of it, Noah starts to panic. The next morning, he wakes up to see Kurt stepping out of the bathroom wearing the sweater he'd stolen from Sebastian. He looks thoroughly showered, unlike last night, which was half-assed at best. Kurt manages a small smile, that looks mostly genuine. When Noah sits up, moving to the edge of the bed, Kurt touches the sides of his face and kisses the top of his mohawk. He whispers, "Thank you, Noah."

Wrapping his arms tight around Kurt's waist, Noah presses his face against Kurt's stomach. "No problem, babe. Are you going to be okay?"

Kurt takes a deep breath before saying, "Yes. Eventually. I'll be fine." With one more kiss to Noah's temple, Kurt moves over to the vanity, sitting down to start a very long regime.

Noah watches him for a few seconds before asking, "Are you going to be able to work tomorrow? They said that's your next shift."

Kurt smiles at him before turning back to the mirror, "Yeah, three days is enough sulking."

Noah just smiles sadly, "If you say so, Princess."

* * *

 

They get a call late Saturday, telling them that Burt and Carole will be home the next day. Kurt buries his pain and tells them he can't wait to see them. The last thing he wants is for his dad to find out what happened. It's hard enough just being in his room, surrounded by Sebastian's stuff.

When he comes home from work on Sunday though, he realizes that won't be a problem anymore. When he walks into his room, the first thing he notices is that the closet is open. When he checks, he sees that everything of Sebastian's is gone. He pokes into the drawers and under the bed, but he'd been very thorough.

On the spare bed is a stack of clothes, which Kurt quickly realizes are his own work clothes, freshly washed. In the stack of clothes, he'll find his dildo, all but sterilized. On the bed is a plastic bag stuffed with everything else he'd left at Sebastian's house. Down to the empty facial scrub he'd tried to throw away. He must have missed the trashcan.

With a jolt, Kurt realizes that Sebastian might have taken his own stuff back, and goes to check his hamper. The sweater is still there. The large t-shirt that Kurt had stolen over a month ago is still in his drawer. _He didn't want anything that reminded him of me. Anything I wore too often, he won't want to look at._

Kurt pushes all of the stuff off the bed, laying down and pressing his face into the pillow to cry. His sobs wrack his body as he lays breathing in Sebastian's scent lingering on the bed.


	17. Chapter 17

[Sebastian]

As Sebastian looks back on the longest week of his life, he really doesn't know what to feel. As soon as he'd heard the door close behind Kurt that day, his anger had drained out of him. He **still** can't believe that his mère had shown up at his house. What the hell could have possessed her to think he'd listen to a damn thing she had to say?

He'd paid for the chinese food, taking it straight to the refrigerator. Even thinking about food had made him feel like throwing up. He only held out for a couple hours before he finally caved, calling his père. He'd told him to come home, that he'd explain in person, but that he needed him to come back because he couldn't stay at the Hudson-Hummel house anymore.

He'd spent most of the day and a half it had taken for his père to come home listening to music in his room, trying desperately to block out everything but the anger. _He'd known. He spoke French. He heard me talking to Grand-mère months ago. He'd known all along about the idiotic plan she'd had, and had made no attempt to go through with it. I can't believe how_ _ **stupid**_ _I was. I really thought he cared about me. At least a little. But no. I'm just a friend. A friend he'd used for sex. Which, to be fair, is what we agreed, but I'd never really_ _ **believed**_ _it._

He'd assumed from the beginning that Kurt would eventually push for dating. _Well, okay. Not the_ _ **beginning**_ _, that would be ridiculous. But when I decided to sleep with him, it was under the assumption that we'd end up together... eventually. I guess I should have told him about my plans. Although I guess not. Clearly he doesn't have any plans of his own with me..._

Sebastian had known for years that he would go to college in New York. Even back when he'd lived in Paris, his père had made no secret of his wish for Sebastian to go to his Alma mater. When Père's old law professor became Dean of Admissions a few years ago, Sebastian knew, if he kept his grades up and his nose clean, he'd have no trouble getting in.

Knowing that a year from now he'd be in New York, with Kurt, Sebastian had started letting himself believe that just once, someone would choose him. He'd be more than a fuck. More than a body, something to fill an urge. That he'd be enough to keep someone around.

Perhaps he should have shared all that with Kurt from the beginning. At least then Sebastian would have known not to get his hopes up. But honestly, after all Kurt had said about not wanting to tie himself down with Puck, Sebastian had thought telling him about wanting to date would scare Kurt away.

_It's not like I have a ring, dammit. I don't expect to marry him. I mean... if we got there one day, awesome. But I'm still young. I want to live it up in New York when I get there... I just don't want to do it alone. It'd be nice if just once I had someone that would rather have_ _**me** _ _than a nameless stranger. I thought keeping it casual would work._

He figured Kurt could have the freedom of New York, and all it's experiences, without the pressure to put his relationship above his career. After all, if his boyfriend was in law school, clearly he'd have his own shit to worry about. _Meeting up once or twice a week, texting when we get a chance... was that really too much to ask for?_ He'd thought he could at least help Kurt not have to troll bars to get laid. Some people would **enjoy** that part of New York. He didn't think Kurt was one of them. _Maybe I was wrong. Maybe Kurt would be okay with sleeping with random people for awhile. Clearly I don't know him as well as I thought I did._

Groaning to himself, Sebastian sits up in bed. _Jesus. I can't keep doing this to myself. Okay. Quick recap, then I'll let this shit go. I agreed to sleep with Kurt because he's hot as hell, and not the walking stereotype I thought he was. I slept with Kurt for about two months. I thought Kurt had feelings for me, more than friendship. I was wrong. He knew about Grand-mère's plan the whole time I lived with him and didn't agree with her. I was just a fuck buddy, which is no one's fault but my own. Kurt didn't really do anything wrong. This is pretty much all on me._

…

_I'm in love with Kurt Hummel._

Sebastian sucks in a deep breath, "Dammit. Too far. I'm not even allowed to **think** that." _Because then I'll have to start trying to piece together how long I've been in love with him and what I should do about it. And the answer to those questions should be left at 'too damned long' and 'nothing, let it go, he doesn't want you.'_

Sebastian gets up, walking past the boxes of crap he'd packed up when he'd snuck into the Hudmel house. He hasn't even been able to open them since he'd stacked them in his room. After he'd explained everything to his père, Sebastian had him call Burt, and tell him he was home now, but thanks for letting him stay. He'd also mentioned that Seb would be dropping by for his stuff, and that he'd leave the key in the mailbox.

Sebastian had borrowed his père's GMC Sierra on Saturday, but when he saw the navigator outside, he'd driven home. He'd come back on Sunday, when he'd known Kurt had a shift at the Lima Bean. He'd packed his crap as quickly as he could, putting everything Kurt had left behind at his house on the bed. He really didn't want Kurt to have any reason to stop back by.

He didn't think he could handle seeing him right now. For the same reason, he'd purged the entire Hudmel house of anything that was his. He'd even checked the hamper to make sure there were no spare socks hanging around. When he'd seen the sweater he'd given Kurt, he'd considered taking it, too. At the last second, he decided to leave it. It would be nice to think that Kurt had kept something of his. That some part of him might stay with Kurt when he finally went to New York. _Except he probably won't even take it. Maybe he trashed it? I know I hurt him when he left, that's why I said it. I needed him to go. I'm in love with him and all he sees of me is my dick._

Sighing as he clomps down the stairs, he walks into the kitchen hoping for coffee. As he sips his père's crappy, cheap coffee, he misses Kurt even more. How he used to spend twice as much time making Sebastian's coffee just to get it perfect.

Flopping down on a stool at the breakfast bar, Sebastian glares into his mug. "Why does everything remind me of him?"

Stephan Smythe turned to him, taking off his glasses and raising his eyebrow. "Because you love him and that's God's funniest joke to play on people. Are you seeing him around corners and shit yet?"

Sebastian scoffs, "No, but thank you for something to look forward to."

Stephan nods, like it's a sincere thanks, and pushes himself away from his laptop, going for more coffee himself. "No problem. Happy to help." As he leans back on the counter, he eventually asks, "So... how long are you going to ignore your grand-mère's calls?"

"Until it stops hurting that she was right, and now I'm alone and miserable." Sebastian huffs. He knows, logically, that it's not her fault. Well, it kind of is. But mostly, it's his own.

"She really was just trying to make you happy. She can't fathom the idea that someone can resist your charms."

Sebastian glares, getting up to dump the coffee, no longer interested. "Yeah, well, neither could I, until it was too late. Now here I am, heartbroken, because she decided to play long-distance matchmaker. Maybe if she had actually **met** Kurt, she'd have realized he didn't feel that way about me."

As he goes to stalk out of the room, Stephan shouts, "Oh! By the way! This weekend, I need you to accompany me to a dinner. I haven't been to one in months so I need to play nice, and I need my lovely son to be there."

Sebastian pauses, looking at his père in horror, "What?! You can't expect me to go somewhere he might be and play the doting son!"

"I doubt he'll be there, everyone would expect him to be busy, he's not a kid anymore. He graduated." Seeing Sebastian's reluctance, Stephan says, "If he's there you can leave immediately and I'll give your excuses."

Sebastian still hesitates before saying, "Fine. But you owe me, old man."

_Oh god. What am I doing?_

* * *

 

Sebastian stands, clutching his glass of sparkling water, obsessively scanning the room. He tells himself that he's trying to be aware, so he can bail if he sees him. He knows it's a lie. As he gets pulled in to one inane conversation after the next, he starts to see what Kurt had meant that day, so long ago, at the Lima Bean. He's surrounded by all these pressed and powdered politicians who would rather eat the shoes on their feet than allow him to marry.

As he stands next to a blonde-bimbo trophy wife with a ring the size of Saturn on her finger, she discreetly pinches his ass. Sebastian can't decide if he's more pissed off at the tramp, or her homophobic husband who smiles at him as he leads her away by the arm.

Fuming, he searches out his père. It's only as he taps him on the shoulder that Seb sees the man on the other side of him. Panicking, Sebastian looks around, looking for familiar, painstakingly coiffed hair. When he turns, Stephan is quick to shake his head, relieving Sebastian with the knowledge that Kurt isn't here. Burt notices him, and before he can start panicking again, because O _h god, what does he know?_ , Burt claps him on the shoulder.

"Hey kid! Haven't see you much. It's weird not having you in the house." Carole just smiles at him, patting his arm before going back to talking to another wife.

Sebastian manages a smile, "Yeah, it's been weird being back home. Not having to fight for the bathroom and defend my right to bacon."

Burt laughs, "Yeah, I miss bacon." Burt turns back to Stephan. "You're lucky, man. You get to keep yours for another year. All my boys are leaving, or gone. Sam is back with his family. Finn is in the army, so who knows when we'll see him again. Kurt leaves for New York in less than a week. I still have Puckerman, but that's-"

"Wait, what?" Sebastian must be having trouble hearing. Less than a week? No. Kurt isn't supposed to leave for New York for another two weeks, at least. "Kurt is leaving this week?"

Burt nods, "Yeah. He decided it would be too sad to stay until school started back up. He's saying his goodbyes this week and then he's going."

Sebastian can't breathe. It's only when his père subtly slaps him on the back, grabbing his shoulder, that it knocks air into him. Stephan says, "Well, that's great. I'm glad he's picking himself up after the let down of not getting into his school. Is there anything we can do to help?"

Burt smiles, "Not unless you know someone who wants to buy a used Lincoln Navigator. He wants to sell it for extra cash. Not like he can use it much up there anyway."

Before Stephan can respond, Sebastian says, "A-actually, I was thinking about asking him what he was going to do with it when he goes. If he's really selling it, I'd love to buy it. It comes in handy for large groups of friends."

Burt seems surprised, but turns to him again, "Really? You wouldn't rather buy a newer model or-"

Sebastian cuts him off, "No, no. I like his. And I know it runs great. How many used cars can you buy knowing the previous owners were mechanics? Since it's Kurt, and he won't let me help any other way, I'll even over pay you for it. It's the least I can do after everything you guys have done for me."

Burt and Stephan share a look. Burt eventually turns back to him, "Okay, that'd be great. I'll call ya tomorrow to work something out."

Sebastian nods, smiling. "Thanks Burt. Um, can you not tell him I'm the one buying it? If he finds out, he won't let me pay as much. And I really do want to help him as much as I can. It's not like that truck isn't worth it."

"Sure, kid. No problem. I'll just tell him it's a high school student that likes to play designated driver, he'll relate."

Sebastian nods, "Thanks. I um... Père, I'm going to go home. I'm not feeling well."

"Sure, son. Be careful getting back."

Sebastian pats his père on his shoulder, shakes Burt's hand, hugs Carole, and runs.

_He can't really be leaving already, can he?!_

* * *

 

When Sebastian gets home, he runs up to his room and starts tearing open boxes. Eventually he finds the box that his laptop is in, digging out the charger. When he gets it booted up, he pulls up his facebook account. Having not checked it in over a week, he's unsurprised by the mass amounts of garbage. Game requests, messages from people he doesn't care about, Jeff losing his shit before he'd caved and answered his calls a few days ago, but no missed messages from Kurt.

He hadn't really expected any. He is relieved to see that he's still friends with him. After scrolling through his timeline, he finds posts Kurt had made in the past few days, talking about the move. He'd mentioned each time a friend moved off to college, and how hard it was boxing up everything in his room. After a few minutes of searching every post and comment, Sebastian finds out, via Sam, that Kurt is leaving on Friday morning. Five days. Four really, since it's so late. Four days and then Kurt would be gone.

_Fuck. What do I do?_

* * *

 

Sebastian spends all of Monday looking for Kurt. He'd spent an hour knocking on the door at the Hudmel house, and gotten no answer. Then he'd gone to the Lima Bean, and asked about him, only to be told that Kurt had quit. Eventually, he even goes to the garage, only to be told that Puck took the day off to take Kurt to Columbus to shop for things he'd need for the move.

Defeated, a day wasted, Sebastian drove home. He'd talked to Burt, and got him to agree to accepting almost twice their lowest offer. He said he'd wait until Saturday to pick it up, so that Kurt wouldn't be stuck in the house.

Tuesday, as he beats on the Hudmel door, he's regretting that decision. _If I had his truck, he'd have to be here. Damn it!_

Just when he's about to lose it, the door opens. Before he can get too excited, Noah Puckerman pushes him backward, stepping out, and shuts the door behind him, leaving them alone on the porch.

As Sebastian opens his mouth to ask if Kurt is there, he's stopped by a fist.

"Fuck! Jesus Christ, Puckerman!" Holding the already swelling cheek, Sebastian feels his lip, wondering if he'd split it.

"What the ever-loving-fuck are you doing here, Craigslist?" Puck glares down at him, arms crossed, refusing to let him anywhere near the door.

Forgetting his face, Sebastian stands up straight, "I need to see Kurt. I just found out he's leaving this week."

"Yeah. I lost my last two weeks with him over you, you sure as hell aren't going near him now. Leave." Puck looks like he wants to hit him again.

Sebastian throws his hands up in surrender. "Hey! No! I just want to apologize. I said some shitty things and I really need to tell him how sorry I am."

Puck smirks at him, "He said you'd show up eventually, and say that. He said to tell you, 'No hard feelings. I guess we weren't really friends after all. I forgive you, but leave me alone.' He knows you better than you think he does. He knew this would happen. Hell, **I** knew this would happen. I just didn't think you'd be that big of a douche about it. Now seriously, leave."

Sebastian actually considers trying to dart around him, to get into the house. Or start yelling, trying to get Kurt to come out. Puck must be able to sense that though, because he says, "Don't you think you've hurt him enough? Leave him alone, dude. I won't stop myself next time. The only reason I'm not kicking your ass right now is because Kurt is already going to kill me. He told me not to hit you."

Mildly cheered that at least Kurt didn't want him beat up, Sebastian shifts nervously. "I really need to talk to him, Puck. I need to tell him something. Well, a few somethings. And I need to hear something from him before I can let all this go. I'm going to park my car on the street. I won't get out. I won't come to the door. I won't even flag him down if he comes out to get in his car. If he wants to talk to me, I'll be here. I'll wait for him to come to me."

Puck stares at him for a few seconds before sighing, "Don't waste your time, dude. He's stubborn. And he already knows what you want to tell him."

Sebastian just shakes his head sadly, "No, he doesn't. I'll wait."

Sebastian turns back around, going to his car. He parks across the street, facing Kurt's bedroom windows. He wonders if his bed is still sitting in the corner. _Probably not._

He waits.

* * *

 

_Wow. He really is stubborn._

Sebastian has now been waiting two days. It's only 6am on Thursday, but Sebastian is really freaking out. _It's the last day. What if he won't see me? How long until I cave and try to sneak in a window or something? Burt isn't home, so I probably wouldn't get shot._

He'd been surprised when Burt and Carole had left last night, late. Something must have come up in D.C. that forced them to make a sudden trip. He knew that Burt would be back by tomorrow morning, no matter what.

He'd already seen movement in Kurt's bedroom window, he was up. Seb wondered if he should just knock on the door, and hope for Kurt to answer. _Bah. I can't. I promised I'd let him come to me. Although, to be fair, I didn't think he'd really make me sit out in my car from sun up to sun down for two days._

Sebastian sighs to himself, leaning back in the seat and staring at the front door, willing it to open. When it does, he almost bangs his head sitting up so fast. Then he sees Puck walk out, holding a coffee, surprisingly in a Lima Bean cup.

When Puck walks over to his car and taps the window, Sebastian rolls it down. "Here. Kurt made this for ya. I think he's caving. I hope you have your shit figured out, because if he **does** give you a second shot, there won't be a third." And then he walks off.

Sebastian just watches him go, still holding the confusing coffee. After Puck drives off, Sebastian leans back, sipping it. _God I've missed his coffee._ Snorting at himself, Seb continues to switch from watching the front door, hoping it will open, to watching Kurt's window, hoping he'll get a glimpse of him.

It's almost an hour later, as he's staring at the window, that he sees the front door open out of his peripheral. Jolting upright, he leans forward, almost spilling what's left of his drink in his lap. When Kurt doesn't move to leave, just nods at Sebastian and moves back inside, Sebastian hesitates.

_Do I go in? Was that a sign it was okay to come in? He left the door open... fuck it._

Before he can second guess himself, Sebastian is out of the car and moving for the door. As he steps through, he yells, "Kurt? I hope that was a sign to come in, not just you being a new brand of mean."

Sebastian jumps about three feet in the air when Kurt calls out to him from the arm chair, not five feet away, "I can hear you, moron. Sit down."

* * *

 

[Kurt]

As Kurt sits, waiting on Sebastian to move, he really has to wonder just what the hell he's doing. _I really am a masochist aren't I? Why am I letting him back in? I've accepted that he doesn't feel the same about me, why do I have to dig this all back up? It's too fresh, I should just tell him to leave me alone._

When Sebastian does move, sitting on the couch, and leaning forward as much as he can, Kurt just stares at him. _Shit. Noah really did punch him. I suppose it could be worse. The swelling isn't bad, and the bruise will fade._ "So... what Sebastian? What is so important that you would sit outside my house this long? Noah told me you wanted to apologize. It's fine. I knew when you said it you were just trying to scare me off. You can't call me Gay Face and then turn around and compliment my ass. That's not the way it works."

Sebastian chuckles, rubbing his neck. _Why is_ _ **he**_ _nervous?_ "I uh... I just found out that you're going on Sunday. At the dinner thing. I didn't expect for you to leave so soon. I thought I'd have more time to figure out what I was going to say and then actually grow the balls to do it."

Kurt just blinks at him, so he continues. "Um... I don't really know why I came. I know it won't change anything, I just couldn't let you go off to your new life hating me."

Kurt scoffs. Sebastian winces, "I know. I have no right to talk. This is all my fault. I should have just been upfront with you from the beginning. If I had known you knew about Grand-mère's fucking plan, we could have talked about-"

Kurt interrupts him, "I don't know her fucking plan! I'm getting really tired of you jumping to conclusions without asking anything! I only heard **you** , dumbass! I know that whatever she said pissed you off, and that you didn't agree with her. You called her crazy, and then told her she was the reason you're gay. By the way, if we get through this, remind me to slap you for talking to your grandmother that way. But that's all I heard! I have no idea what she was doing! Or why."

Sebastian stares at him, honestly shocked. "W-wait! What? You didn't know? You-" He leans forward, almost falling off the couch at this point. "You really don't know what she said?"

Kurt just glares at him, "How the fuck would I know Sebastian? I only heard you screaming at her like a crazy person. I can't believe you cuss like that in front of your grandmother. What the hell?"

Sebastian laughs, "Okay. Now I definitely know you didn't hear her. She's worse than I am." He rubs his palms on his jeans, glancing up at Kurt. He sighs, "Okay. So... I guess the first thing I should do is apologize again. I thought you knew what she wanted and you disagreed so much that you wouldn't even consider it... and that changed what we've been doing this summer."

Kurt is just confused now, "What? That didn't make any sense."

Sebastian sinks back on the couch, like he's trying to escape the conversation now. "After the gala, three months ago, I called Grand-mère. I spent more time than I realized ranting about you and your stupid opinions about politicians. Which I kind of agree with now, for the record. And fuck you for pointing it out. I can never go to those things again."

Kurt just smiles a little. _Well at least he's not a total moron then._ "Anyway, it was later that week that she called my père, making some excuse about dying to get him to go to Paris. When we were outside the Lima Bean, I found out the truth. She did this whole fucking thing so that I'd have to spend time with you."

Kurt sputters, "What? **Why**?"

Sebastian winces, "She was under the impression that I liked you. She said all my ranting and raving, all my complaints about you, etc, were because I liked you but didn't want to admit it. She said that if I spent more time with you, eventually you'd fall in love with me and I could stop 'whoring around'."

Dead silence. Kurt can't think of a single fucking thing to say to this. Sebastian can't look up at him, refuses to see his face, so he just continues,

"I told her she was wrong, and evil, but she didn't care. She said even if she was wrong, she'd get her son for the summer, and I could join them when 'I got my head out of my ass'. Told me to bring you along, she wanted to meet you. That's when I finally gave up and just tried to get through the summer."

Kurt is having trouble making words. _I could have gone to Paris. She wants to meet me. He thought I knew all this? Jesus._ "So... you thought I knew about that, and was, what? Refusing to date you?"

Sebastian still hadn't looked up. "Well, I wouldn't have cared two months ago. But, after Mère came, I thought that you'd spent the whole summer thinking 'Yeah, right. Who'd date him?' but then started fucking me anyway."

"What?! Is that really the type of person you think I am?!" As Kurt sits there, wishing to god he'd just told Sebastian to leave him alone, he can't decide if he's more pissed off or hurt.

"Clearly I don't know what kind of person you are! I didn't think you could handle being fuck buddies either!" Kurt can see when Sebastian realizes what he said, he looks like he wants nothing more than to reach up and slap a hand over his mouth. Instead he just sits in frozen silence, as if waiting for the firing squad.

Kurt gapes at him, like a fish, opening and closing his mouth. "You... you didn't think I could be just fuck buddies with you. So... what were we doing then? Did you plan to make me fall in love with you so you could dump me? Or did you just not care if I ended up feeling more than you did, since I wouldn't be here, and you wouldn't have to deal with it?"

Sebastian sinks down further into the couch. "No... I didn't think you'd fall in love with me... I just didn't think you could sleep with someone all summer and not develop **some** feelings. When we first started sleeping together, I thought you'd eventually push me to start a relationship, even if it was just a casual dating thing."

_Well, you bit off more than you could chew didn't you, dumbass? At least he didn't know I'd fall for him, he just didn't know how to handle it when I did. Didn't want to deal with it. Ugh._ "Okay... well, clearly that isn't what happened. Now that we've cleared that up, can you go? It's hard enough for me to sit here and play nice. I really can't be your friend after all this. I'd hoped you'd understand that."

Sebastian flinches, "Well, it's not like I want to be just friends either. But I get your point, you can't trust me after all the shit I did. I'll go. I just really wanted to say that I'm sorry. And I hope you're happy in New York." Sebastian gives him a small, sad smile and gets up from the couch.


	18. Chapter 18

[Kurt]

_He doesn't want to be_ _**just** _ _friends? What the hell does that mean? What the hell does he want then? He_ _**can't** _ _want to keep hooking up... He knows I'm in love with him... right? That was why he freaked out... Shit. No. He freaked out because he thought I knew about the plan. But if he didn't know I loved him..._

Sebastian had just stepped up to the door when Kurt finally got up, facing him. "Wait a minute. What do you mean you don't want to be just friends? I thought you were pissed off because you didn't want to date me. You told me to stop acting like your boyfriend, that we were just fucking. Then you turn up, telling me you'd expected me to force dating. Now I'm just really fucking confused."

Sebastian sighs, banging his head on the door. Then he turns, "I thought you were fucking with me. I thought you had decided that we wouldn't date, but you kept acting like we were. We spent more time cuddling than fucking. You're the first person I've ever slept in the same bed with. I spent the past two months thinking that when we got to New York, we'd be together. Maybe even try the fucking long distance thing. Then you pop off with 'We're friends! You can trust me!' and I realized how stupid I was being."

Kurt is speechless for a full 45 seconds before he breaks. "What?! When **we** get to New York? When the hell are you going to New York? And what the fuck?! You've been assuming we were dating?!"

Sebastian slumps back against the door, staring at his feet. "I didn't tell you about New York. I figured it'd scare you off. You said if you wanted a relationship, you'd date Puck. So I figured I'd let you start liking me first, then be like, 'Oh hey, I'm going to college in New York next year! We should hang out!'. Then the whole thing went to shit before I got a chance to tell you." At Kurt's blank stare, Sebastian continues,

"My père went to NYU Law. He has connections there. It's all but assured that I'm going there next year. To NYU, and then law school." Still nothing. "I didn't know where exactly you fell on the relationship thing. You've given mixed signals about it. One second you're talking about how you prefer dating, the next you're talking about how you don't want to settle down too young. So I didn't know what I could say that wouldn't scare you off. So I just didn't talk about it."

_He doesn't know. He_ _ **can't**_ _know I'm in love with him if he really thinks he'd have scared me off. Holy shit. How did this happen?_ Kurt finally manages, in a weak voice, to ask, "You couldn't tell what I wanted... What did you want then?"

Sebastian huffs, "I wanted to date you. At least casually. If it turned into more when we were in New York, then we'd deal with it then. I'm not even remotely ready to think about like... marriage and shit. I figured until I got to New York, we'd Skype sometimes. I didn't really plan to tell you not to sleep with other people, because that's not really fair when I'm in fucking Ohio... but it'd be nice to hear from you." He bangs his head back on the door, closing his eyes, saying,

"I was hoping when I got to New York you'd still be single. That we could date for real. Meet up once or twice a week. Spend nights together when we're able. Text each other, or meet for coffee. Stupid shit. If we wanted to go out to clubs or whatever, we'd go together. I mean, we'd be in school. I wouldn't want to like, live together. I need to be able to focus on work, and I wouldn't be able to do that with you running around in only my shirts or something. I have to get through school as soon as I can. It'll take six years no matter what I do."

Kurt makes a gargling sound, like he's trying to force words out, but they aren't coming. So Sebastian sighs again, standing straight. "Look, I get it. It's not what you want. Maybe you really would like random hook ups in New York, I can hardly judge you for it. And I don't blame you for not wanting all that crap with me. If you wouldn't do it for Puck, you sure as hell won't wait for me."

That finally snaps Kurt out of it, "It's not the same thing!" When Sebastian just raises an eyebrow, Kurt scoffs. "I told you! The problem with Noah is that he wants a family. He wants to get married. He doesn't really have any great plans. He doesn't want to live in Lima forever. That's it. Other than that, he wants the marriage and the kids. He wants them **soon**. I don't. I might want that stuff eventually, but not in my teens! That's crazy to me."

Kurt takes a few breaths then says, "If Noah had some dream he could fulfill in New York, something that would keep him busy while I'm off doing my thing, that'd be different. I can't be the only thing he goes to New York for. It'd be too much pressure on us. He'd force the marriage thing, and before I knew it, I'd be back in Lima, making waffles with a baby on my hip. As much as I love Noah, that's not what I want right now."

Sebastian just watches him, looking like he's holding his breath. Kurt takes a step forward, "B-but... if you're really going to New York... for school... and you want to date me when you get there? Ye-yeah. That sounds amazing. Too good to be true actually... You said to stop acting like your boyfriend... you said you wouldn't have told me about your mother, that you didn't want to talk to me about it. That I was the last person you'd want to comfort you about her. How does that equate to you wanting to date me?"

Sebastian panics, stepping forward, "No! That's not what I meant! When I said to stop acting like my boyfriend, it was because you had **just** called us friends. You didn't see me as a boyfriend, so I didn't want to have to watch you acting like I was. And I wouldn't have told you about Mère. I've never told anyone about her. Do you really think I want to admit to anyone that my own mother couldn't love me? Didn't pick me over some guy she was fucking? I don't like anything that reminds me of her. You heard her call me 'Bassy'. It's why I hate the name 'Bas' so much. It reminds me of it."

Kurt looks horrified, "When I call you 'Bas' it makes you think of your mother?! I've called you that during sex, damn it!"

Sebastian laughs, despite their current situation. "God, chill out, Peach. You were the exception. It bothered me a little, at first. But the second time you ever really called me that, was the first time we had sex. So now when I hear you say it, I still hear it in that sexy, gaspy voice. Trust me, the last thing I'm thinking of is Mère."

Kurt relaxes, "Jesus. Don't scare me like that." After a few seconds, Kurt gets back on topic. "But, still. You wouldn't tell me about her, you didn't want me to comfort you... what am I supposed to think about that?"

Sebastian's hands twitch, like he wants to reach out. "I didn't want your pity, Kurt. I didn't want you to see that weak, pathetic side of me. The side that aches every time someone chooses to leave me, or picks someone else. I knew that you had your own issues with mothers, since yours died when you were young." At Kurt's look, he says, "Burt told me, that first day. I'm sorry you went through that."

Kurt shifts on his feet, before looking up "Honestly, It's fine. I was young enough that it's normal for me. Having Carole around is actually what's strange. I can't really get used to having a mother again." He coughs, "As for pitying you, I really hate that word. I'm not sure if there's a difference between pity and sympathy. Either way, what is so wrong with someone trying to understand what you're going through and wishing for something else for you? With wanting to hold someone, letting them know that what they're going through sucks, and you wish it was different?"

Kurt sighs, defeated, "It's not like I sit around thinking, 'Oh, poor Sebastian. His life is so hard'. Fuck that. You're hot, rich, and smart. There's not much to pity about you. Just because my parents are awesome, so I can't really **empathize** , that doesn't stop me from wanting to beat your mother with a tire iron."

Sebastian smiles. "It's fine, Peach. She's not worth jail time. Hopefully she'll take a hint and crawl back under her rock. She hasn't been back at any rate."

Nodding, Kurt presses his hands together in front of him, debating on what to say. "So... you want to date me, casually, when you get to New York?"

Sebastian hesitates for a second, before finally figuring if he's in this far, fuck it. "Actually, that was the original plan, but I can't really see doing that now."

Kurt's face falls. "Oh."

Sebastian goes on, looking back to his feet, before Kurt can think too much, "I really don't want to wait a year to be with you. I know you'll be in New York and the last thing you're going to want to deal with is a long-distance relationship, but I don't think I can handle you hooking up with random men there. Sitting here, knowing that the guy I love is in New York with countless men when I'm so far away and unable to do anything about it... it makes my skin crawl."

When Sebastian gets no response after about 15 seconds, his shoulders drop. After a full minute though, he pulls himself together enough to look up. Kurt is just staring at him, open mouthed. Sebastian blinks at him.

After another few seconds, Sebastian scowls. "What?"

_He... he doesn't even know what he said. Does that mean he didn't mean it?_ Kurt stammers, "Y-you said... 'the guy you love'. D-did you mean that?"

Sebastian facepalms. "Damn it. That's not how I meant to tell you. It just fucking slipped out." When all Kurt does is stare at him again, Sebastian huffs. "Don't freak out! It's not like I planned this shit. Don't worry, I won't like, stalk you or something. I know you're going to be busy there, you'll have to find a job, and you'll be in school soon enough. I just really don't want you to sleep around up there... it would kill me. I know that's selfish. I would just like to either talk to you or text you everyday. If you're busy, just text back later or something. Let me know you got home okay, even if I'm already asleep. It won't matter that you don't love me back at first. We'll deal with it next year if you still aren't **there** yet."

Kurt is down right gaping now. _He really loves me? Already? For how long? He wants to date me long-distance?!_ _ **Sebastian Smythe**_ _wants to give up sex, pretty much completely, just so I won't hook up?_

Kurt still can't form sentences. Sebastian warily says, "Is it that impossible? I didn't know you liked sex **that** much, Kurt. I'll buy you a bigger dildo, for fuck's sake. I just can't handle you with someone else. It's bad enough being in love in the first fucking place. Let alone with someone who's going to be almost 600 miles away and doesn't actually love me back-"

Kurt cuts him off, "Yes." When he sees Sebastian's shoulders slump again, Kurt realizes what he said. "No! I mean-! It's not impossible, I'll do it. I'll date you long distance. I'll be flying back during Thanksgiving and Christmas, and you can move up there this summer, so it's only like nine months. If pregnant women can do it, we can, too."

Sebastian laughs, "That made no sense." He steps forward, cautiously. "So... we're dating? You're like, my **boyfriend** now?"

Kurt smiles, tears in his eyes, "Yes. We're dating. I won't mess around in New York. I'll focus on finding a job and getting into NYADA, or somewhere else. And when you get there, we'll try your idea of casual dating, because even though we feel more than you had planned to, we'll still both be busy."

When Kurt moves in to kiss him, Sebastian pulls back, "Don't you mean 'even **if** we feel more'?"

Kurt frowns. _What? Why_ _ **wouldn't**_ _we-? Shit!_ "I skipped a step! I love you, too!"

Sebastian just stares at him. " **What?!** "

Kurt winces, "I'm sorry?" When all he gets is a glare, Kurt says, "I thought you knew! I thought that's why you freaked out! You sounded like you could tell I was in love with you and you didn't want it. I thought that's why you kicked me out. Because I was like Sir Gropey or whatever."

"Sir Handsy. And **no**! I didn't know! Damn it, Kurt! You let me go on and on about my feelings when you could have just put me out of my fucking misery?!" Sebastian looks like he wants to start shaking him.

Kurt just smiles, wrapping his arms around Seb's neck. "I know, but it was so cute! And I couldn't believe you were saying it. I never would have imagined you loved me back. I didn't know you were coming to New York, we never talked about the future. You told me it was just for the summer. So I didn't say anything. Then today you start spouting all this stuff and I couldn't process it. Then by the time speech became an option again, I forgot to tell you the key part. Sorry 'bout that."

Sebastian puts his head down on Kurt's shoulder. "I can't even- 'Sorry 'bout that.' That's all I get? Jesus fucking Christ, Hummel. You have no idea what you've done to me today."

"Yeah well, you started it, Meerkat. I spent the past two weeks thinking I'd never see you again, then all the sudden you start stalking me. Now you love me. I have no idea what to do with that information."

Sebastian smirks at him. Without warning, he bends down and picks Kurt up, throwing him over his shoulder in a fireman's lift. "Don't worry. I know what to do with it. We're going to take it into the bedroom."

Kurt's shrieking is ignored as Sebastian stomps up the stairs.

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

As he steps through Kurt's bedroom door, Sebastian relents to the kicking and screaming, putting him back down on his feet. Laughing at the glare Kurt is aiming at him, Sebastian leans forward and presses his lips to Kurt's.

The glare immediately melts and Kurt leans in, wrapping his arms around Sebastian's neck, pulling his fingers through the short hairs at the nape. Eventually parting for breath, Sebastian rests his forehead against Kurt's.

Kurt mumbles, "How am I going to make it for months without seeing you?"

"Fuck that. I give it maybe a month before I talk Père into flying me there for the weekend. I plan to annoy the shit out of him." _If nothing else, I can get Grand-mère to fund it. She's old and loaded, with nothing better to do than play matchmaker. She can cover the expenses._

"Oh god! I forgot! You're rich!" Kurt bites his lip. "I can't let you spend that much money on me. That's insane. Flying all the way to New York just to visit your boyfriend for a few days?"

Sebastian snorts, "Fine, I'll just drive the nine hours there. And it wouldn't just be for you, Peach. How do you think I'm going to handle not touching you for that long?"

"Naked Skype sessions?" Seeing Sebastian's eyes darken, Kurt laughs.

Sebastian snaps out of his stupor, "Okay, enough distractions." Sebastian reaches down, grabbing Kurt's thighs and wrapping them around his waist, walking over to the bed.

Kurt groans, pressing himself closer and wrapping his arms and legs tighter, kissing down Seb's neck.

After laying Kurt down in the middle of the bed, Sebastian leans over him, kissing him again. Sebastian runs his hands from Kurt's waist up and under his shirt, feeling the smooth skin of his torso. He breaks away from Kurt's mouth long enough to pull the fitted black t-shirt over his head. As he leans back in, he mumbles against Kurt's mouth, "I can't believe you answered the door in only a t-shirt and jeans. What gives?"

Kurt shrugs, saying "I wasn't leaving the house, only talking to you. And you've obviously seen me in less." before kissing Sebastian's jawline.

Groaning, Sebastian runs his fingertips back across Kurt's chest, leaning down to lick at a nipple. When Kurt moans and arches into him, he closes his mouth around it, sucking and nipping the hardened nub.

Kurt presses his hips up into Sebastian, whimpering out, "Bas- guh! … Bas, come on. Pants off."

Sebastian gets up, taking off his clothes in record time before leaning down to help Kurt shimmy out of his skinny jeans. When they're both naked, Sebastian goes to reach for the nightstand. Kurt stops him with a hand on his arm, biting his lip again.

At Sebastian's cocked eyebrow, Kurt swallows nervously before saying, "Um... okay. I love you. And um... I've been wanting to try something for awhile. I actually wanted to try it with Blaine that one time, but he 'wasn't comfortable with it'."

Sebastian growls, "You probably shouldn't be talking about your ex-boyfriend in bed, Peach." Kurt smiles, but doesn't respond. Sebastian sighs, "So, what did you want to try?"

Kurt shifts again. "You said you're clean, right? And the only person you've been with since you checked is me?"

"Yeeees... Where is this going?" Now Sebastian looks nervous.

"Would you... I mean..." Kurt huffs. "Do you want to try it without a condom?"

Sebastian freezes, his eyes glazing over. Kurt starts to panic. _What the hell is that? Even Blaine just said 'Uh, no. Gross.' Did he slip into a coma? What the fuck._

Kurt is pulled out of his thoughts by Sebastian's shaking shoulders. Before he can comment, Seb looks up at him, his laugh tapering off. "How are you even fucking real? Seriously."

Kurt asks warily, "Is that a 'yes'?"

Sebastian just looks at him like he's crazy. "Who the hell would say no to that? Knowing that it's safe, of course."

"Well, Bl-"

"No! Don't say it. Nevermind. Just... Hell yes!" Sebastian is still staring at him like he expects Kurt to laugh and tell him it's a joke.

Kurt fidgets, "What? I just want to feel you without the barrier... and it's safe... and I really like the idea of you coming inside me. It's hot."

Sebastian groans again, throwing his hand up over Kurt's mouth. "Dear god, shut up. You can't **say** shit like that, Peach!"

Kurt slaps his hand away, "But I thought you would like it? I mean, if you told me you wanted **me** to come in **you** , I'd find that really fucking hot."

"Guh! Seriously, Peach. It's time to hush now." At Kurt's pout, Sebastian leans in to kiss him. "It **is** hot, that's kind of the problem. If you keep talking about it, this is going to be a very short conversation."

Kurt smiles widely, "Oh! See. I'm still not used to you finding me hot. Okay. So get the lube, but we don't need condoms, obviously."

Sebastian shakes his head, leaning over to the nightstand. "Jesus Christ. You're trying to kill me. There **are** quicker methods, ya know?"

"If you mean 'la petite mort', I'm working on it, but you keep distracting me." Kurt says with a sage nod.

Sebastian glares at him, "Oh, yes. **I'm** the distraction here." When Kurt goes to respond, Sebastian cuts him off, "Do you **want** to spend our first time together as a couple gagged? Because I'm starting to feel irrational."

Kurt pipes up with, "Kinky!" Seeing the exasperation on Sebastian's face, Kurt says, "Okay, okay! I'll stop. Just get the lube."

Sebastian shakes his head again, grabbing the half empty bottle and the box of tissues. Sitting back on his knees, he picks up Kurt's legs under the knees and presses them back, almost touching them to Kurt's shoulder. Knowing each other well, Kurt reaches out and holds them himself, so Seb can prep him.

Logically, Sebastian knows Kurt can do this with no prep at all, but he's never actually been able to just go at it. He slicks up two fingers and slowly presses them inside Kurt, relieved but confused that they went in so easily. After just enough time to spread the lube, he pulls his hand away.

With a questioning look at Kurt, Sebastian pushes his hands away. Kurt blushes. "Shut up. The man I'm in love with was sitting outside my window, stalking me. And I didn't know we'd be doing this. I thought you came to say goodbye."

Sebastian laughs, pushing his knees up further and moving himself into position. "So you fingered yourself while I was outside? What the hell, babe."

Blushing more, Kurt says, "Shut up and fuck me. You're such a pain in the ass."

Sebastian can't stop the burst of laughter. "Well, not quite yet." And then he pushes inside. Kurt just gasps, breathing through the initial pain. Then he slaps Sebastian.

Sebastian isn't paying attention. Doesn't even notice the slap really, he's just trying very, very hard not to come. _Oh god. So tight. Was it always this hot? Jesus fuck._

Refusing to give in, Kurt clenches down on Seb's cock, wiggling around a little. Sebastian groans, then slaps Kurt on the hips, saying, "Jesus fucking Christ, baby, don't move!" After a few more seconds, he pulls out a little. As he starts a slow rhythm, Sebastian can't help but watch Kurt's face.

Seeing the pain slowly melt into pure pleasure, he starts to move harder, but not faster. He loves seeing Kurt fall apart. Groaning and gasping, whimpering and whining. Kurt's the most responsive person he's has ever been with, which is saying something.

Sebastian leans down, bracing himself on his forearms. As he leans in for a kiss, he can feel the shift. With the next thrust, Seb nails his prostate and Kurt arches up into him, keening. Sebastian smirks, biting his lip and reaching one hand down to slowly work his dick.

Kurt starts panting, gasping out, "Bas! God... yeah! I'm... Bas!" Sebastian speeds up, both his thrusts and his hand.

Kurt finally clamps down on Sebastian's cock, coming all over himself. Grabbing Sebastian's shoulders and pulling him in, Kurt groans in his ear, "Come in me, Bas!"

Sebastian shuddered, suddenly being pushed off the edge and coming deep inside of Kurt. After his body had finally stopped shaking, Sebastian finds himself all but collapsed on Kurt. He'd never come that much in his life. _Holy fucking shit. Did I black out? Or just fall down?_

Eventually, he notices that Kurt is all but purring, rubbing his hands lazily up and down his back. When Seb leans back to kiss Kurt again, he gets a pleased hum, and a slap to his ass.

"Okay, Bas, as much as I love having you in me, and trust me, I have more of you in me than I really thought I would, get out." Sebastian laughs, slowly pulling out of Kurt's somewhat abused ass. Kurt only winces a little though, so he considers his job well done. After wiping himself off with tissues, he just sits back, waiting on Kurt to decide what to do. He's only mildly surprised by the glare.

"No, I mean it. Get out." When Sebastian just blinks at him in confusion, Kurt huffs. "Go grab some coffee or a sandwich or something. I need a minute to figure out how the hell to deal with this and I don't need an audience."

Sebastian just shakes his head, not pointing out that he'd be fine staying to help clean up, or whatever it is that Kurt is going to do. Some things are just private. So he leans in to give him one more long, deep kiss.

As he bounces up and throws on his underwear, he leans in one more time to press a smacking kiss on Kurt, yelling out "Love you, too!" before leaving the room.

* * *

 

Sebastian is still glaring at the coffee machine, trying to figure out how to turn it on, when Kurt comes in about ten minutes later. Sebastian glances up at him, smirking when he sees that Kurt is only wearing Sebastian's t-shirt. "How do you work this devil machine?"

Kurt snorts, "You don't. I do. I just needed you out of the room. Move, I'll do it." Grumbling slightly, Sebastian steps away far enough that Kurt can slide in and start using the evil contraption. Within a minute, Seb is pressed against Kurt's back, hands sliding up the shirt and sucking on the side of his neck. Kurt moans quietly before asking, "What are you doing? We're in the kitchen."

"I'm watching. I need to learn how to use that damned thing before I get to New York. I'm assuming I'll be spending time in your apartment. Do you really want me to make you get up every time I need to be a functioning member of the human race?" Sebastian stops kissing and sucking Kurt's neck to speak, but goes right back to it.

After Kurt has made his own coffee, with no more breaks from Sebastian, he huffs. "You are not even remotely paying attention."

"Sure I am, Peach. I've been trying my best to make this hickey look like New York. Ya know, for festiveness." Sebastian makes no effort to hide his smirk, just going back to sucking Kurt's neck.

"God save me from morons." Kurt just goes on with making Sebastian's drink.

"You say 'God' a lot, for someone that doesn't believe in it."

Kurt snorts. "You don't have to believe in the religion to use the term. I can talk about Santa Claus too if that makes you feel better." When he only gets a chuckle in reply, Kurt says, "I used to say Gaga a lot, but that got exhausting. Not really sure when I stopped. Besides. I don't say it that often."

Sebastian finally stops assaulting his neck, but only because he leans up to whisper in Kurt's ear. "Sure you do, baby. You **love** to moan out 'Bas, oh god! **Bas**!' when we fuck."

Kurt chokes on air for a second before turning in Sebastian's arms to slap at him. "Sebastian Smythe! Do **not** mock me for my sex noises! And **especially** not in my father's kitchen."

Sebastian just grins, "Who's mocking? I love it when you moan like that. It's so fucking hot. And why not in the kitchen? It's one of the few places we haven't christened yet. We're running out of time. We should really get on that."

Kurt is interrupted mid-glare by Sebastian picking him up and putting him up on the counter, pulling him down into a kiss.

Kurt moans again as Sebastian's hands creep back under the shirt, "Well, if you insist."


	19. Chapter 19

[Kurt]

Kurt and Sebastian had spent all day having sex in various locations around the house. They hadn't stopped to do much more than shower, which had actually lead to some fantastic shower sex with Kurt pinned to the wall. It was only fair after he'd bent Sebastian over the arm of the couch.

They hadn't even been watching the clock that closely. If they had, they would have known to put pants on by now.

At almost 6pm, the door downstairs closes, and Kurt pops up off of Sebastian's cock, mid-blowjob. "Shit! That's Noah." As they already hear feet running up the stairs, Kurt throws himself down in Sebastian's lap and throws the sheet around them.

When Noah barges in, without knocking, Kurt holds his breath.

"Damn it, Princess! We talked about this! You can't keep doing this to yourself!" Kurt flinches so Sebastian wraps one arm around his waist, pulling him back against him, and the other around his collarbone. He kisses Kurt's shoulder blade and glares at Noah, which just pisses him off more. "You! What the fuck are you still doing here? You were supposed to apologize and leave! Not fuck with his head some more!"

Sebastian growls, "I'm not fucking with his head! I didn't know he was in love with me! I thought he just saw me as a friend!"

"So it's okay to fuck him as long as he loves you?!" Noah looks like the only thing stopping him from punching Sebastian again is that Kurt is sitting between them. Which was intentional.

"It is if I love him back!" Sebastian glares up at Puck, refusing to back down and Kurt smiles. _I don't think it'll ever get old, hearing that._

Noah narrows his eyes, like he's waiting on an explanation. Kurt huffs, "At least wait downstairs, so we can get dressed. I'll make coffee, since we never did get around to that before. You guys can hash all this out down in the living room."

"Fine. You've got two minutes to get downstairs before I lose it, Princess." Noah stomps out of the room.

Sebastian groans, flopping back on the bed. "Can't we just tell him we're soulmates and look at each other all dreamy eyed until he runs away?"

Kurt snorts, "Nice try, but he's best friends with Finn Hudson. If that shit bothered him, he wouldn't have survived Finchel." Kurt gets up, going to look for some clothes to wear that weren't already packed. Let alone that Sebastian would fit in.

Kurt manages to dig out a pair of sweatpants that Finn had left behind and lets him have his own shirt. Kurt slips on tight, black dance shorts and the sweater that Sebastian had given him. When he turns around, Sebastian is standing right behind him. He grabs Kurt up in a kiss saying, "I'm glad you kept it. I wasn't sure you would."

Kurt shrugs, "It wasn't like I could throw it away. It hurt to keep it but it would have killed me to get rid of it. Noah even threatened to burn it." Kissing him one last time, Kurt takes Sebastian's hand and leads him back to the living room.

Noah glares at the return of the sweater and eyes Sebastian warily. "Okay, now will someone tell me what the fuck is going on?"

Kurt just huffs at Noah, releasing Sebastian to march over to him. When he stops suddenly in front of him, Noah jerks back, like he's expecting a hit. Kurt giggles and leans down, kissing Noah on the cheek. "Thank you for worrying about me, sweetie. But seriously, calm down. Everything is fine." He turns to flounce out of the room, calling back over his shoulder, "Sebastian will explain while I make the drinks. I need an iced something, I'm dying in the heat. Oh, and Noah? If you hit him again, your balls will be permanently lodged into your eye sockets."

* * *

 

When Kurt walks back in, 15 minutes and three iced coffees later, Noah has noticeably relaxed and Sebastian is sitting comfortably on the couch. Kurt passes Noah his drink and then sits curled up into Sebastian's side. He's only half paying attention to what they're talking about, instead he's turning his head sideways, trying to decide if the hickey under Seb's jaw looks more like Ohio or Maine. Eventually he's snapped out of it by Noah's sudden shout of,

"God dammit, Bowser! It's the last night. I'm staying. I'll drag your old bed back, or sleep in Finn's room if I really have to. But I'm staying. I'm sure you guys have fucked enough, look at you. You're all kinds of fucked out." Noah is pouting, so Kurt tries to stifle the giggle-fit he wants to have.

"Okay, two things. One; Bas! Stop fucking with him. You know you're not going to kick him out. And two; Noah, did you really just call him Bowser?" Kurt glares over at Noah. Sebastian just laughs, wrapping his arm around Kurt's waist.

"Hell yes I did. He stole my Princess. When he told me you've been letting him call you Peach, I knew it was over. So now, he's Bowser." Noah was sulking even more now, and Kurt couldn't contain his giggles,

"Awww. You're the most emo Mario ever."

Sebastian laughs, taking a sip of his drink, before finally remembering to ask, "Hey, so how exactly did my morning coffee come from the Lima Bean? I've been here since before it opened. You never left."

Noah finally cracks a smile and Kurt blushes. "Um... well..."

"He totally stole a shit ton of their cups. They're in the basement. His dad is just going to ship them as needed." Noah grins at Kurt proudly.

"No I didn't! I left money. And they knew who did it, I quit the next day. I'm kind of afraid to go in there actually. I left a little more than they actually pay for them, and they were surplus! They'd been shoved in the back, they had the old logo on them and everything. Anyway..." Kurt finally gives up, seeing Noah and Sebastian look more and more amused the longer he went on.

After a few minutes of silence, Sebastian sighs. "Alright, I've put it off as long as I can. What time is your flight tomorrow? How long do I actually have left?"

Noah looks at Sebastian in sympathy. He's possibly the only person in the world that's going to miss Kurt as much as he will. Burt will miss him on a whole different level, but he's been preparing for this for 18 years. It's not the same.

Kurt snuggles closer. "My flight isn't until almost noon, but Dad wants to take me out for breakfast first, we'll leave by 9. He'll be home in the morning." He can feel Sebastian's heavy sigh, and he's pulled in closer. When Kurt looks up to Noah, hoping for advice on what to do, he sees that Noah is slumped down in the chair, chewing on his lip and staring at the ground. He must let out some sound that tips off Sebastian, because he taps Kurt on the hip, pushing him up to stand.

Then Sebastian turns, putting his back against the arm of the couch and pulling Kurt to sit between his knees. Once Kurt is settled, Sebastian has him cross his legs. Quickly catching on, Kurt shifts to kiss Sebastian over his shoulder. When he pulls away, Kurt turns to Noah and opens his arms.

Noah glances back and forth between Sebastian and Kurt for a second before moving forward. He lays on the couch, putting his head in Kurt's lap, hugging him around the waist. Kurt leans back against Sebastian, feeling his arms wrap around him above Noah's.

For long minutes, they just sit there, no one moving or speaking. Eventually the quiet is broken by Noah saying,

"You better not get a boner right now, Bowser."

* * *

 

[Sebastian]

That night Sebastian is curled up in bed with Kurt. Puck had given them some time alone and is actually taking a shower. A long one. _Oh, wow. What are the odds that he's jacking off in there? Not sure if that should be hot or gross. Actually, I'm not sure if I'm allowed to think about it. Some people are weird about that shit._

"Hey, Kurt?" At the sleepy 'Hmm?' he gets, Sebastian says, "This is, of course, purely hypothetical, but do you consider thinking about other people cheating?"

Kurt shoots up, suddenly much more awake. "What, like during sex?! Are you serious?! We've been together for **one day**!"

Sebastian laughs, "No! Not during sex! Although, now I'm kind of interested to hear if you consider that cheating too. I just mean, randomly thinking about other guys being hot or whatever. Some people are weird with what they call 'cheating'. I just need to know what minefields to avoid."

Kurt snorts, "Oh god. I never told you what broke Blaine and I up did I?" At Sebastian's raised eyebrow, Kurt says, "Apparently, I cheated on him."

Sebastian's eyes bug out, " **What**?"

Laughing, Kurt explains, "Blaine had been ignoring me; pulling away, I later found out, because of New York. I met this guy. He was kind of nerdy chic, but definitely not my type. He was actually a bit too much like me on crack. But he was sweet. We bonded over New York and musicals. He was going to school there too. He asked for my number... it wasn't 100% innocent, but come on. I wasn't going to cheat on Blaine. We started texting. He said some things that were... inappropriate. And I didn't make him stop. I didn't say them back, but I didn't really discourage him. He complimented me, and he was interested in me." Kurt shrugs and tapers off, embarrassed by how stupid it sounds now.

Sebastian asks, "So... when you say inappropriate, do mean **me** inappropriate, or...?"

Kurt giggles, "No! I would have stopped that. He was saying things about acting out sappy movies together, and telling me how much he liked my voice. He complimented my clothes a lot. Especially if they were tight. Things like that. I knew it would hurt Blaine if he knew, but I didn't think it was **that** bad. I didn't think it was **cheating**."

"That's because it's **not**. I said worse shit than that the day I **met** Blaine." Sebastian snorts, dismissing it.

"That's what I said! Well, not **that** , but that you were worse. He didn't see it. What he did was sing 'It's Not Right, But It's Okay' in glee the next day. I was pissed. That started the fight that broke us up." Kurt is still pissed, if he thinks about it.

Sebastian just laughs, "Wow. That's super shitty." He shakes his head. "But no, for the record, I don't consider what you did cheating. Or really, what Blaine did with me either. I didn't push past that line. Full disclosure; I would have, if I thought he'd go for it."

Kurt deadpans, "Thank you for your honesty, Bas. That means the world to me."

Sebastian just smirks, "No problem, Peach. So, what **do** you consider cheating?"

Kurt fidgets, "Maybe I'm old fashioned, but- kissing? And more, obviously."

Laughing, Sebastian says, "Well, shit. You've already cheated on me! You kissed Mario as soon as we came down the stairs."

After a moment of confusion, Kurt snaps, "Oh, come on! The cheek doesn't count. Honestly, if we're talking Noah, even on the lips shouldn't count, if it was quick. Not that I would do that with us dating, but still."

"Well, you weren't clear, babe." Sebastian cuddles closer to Kurt, pulling him tighter against him. "I think it's mainly **intent**. I wouldn't consider texting the way you were cheating. Because you didn't plan to move it any further. I'm sure if he started making graphic comments about what he wanted to do to you, you'd have torn him a new one. Same with kissing. I don't consider anything you do with Puck cheating because I know that if you were going to go there, I'd have never stood a chance."

Kurt smiles, "So, basically, as long as I don't mean it sexually or whatever, I'm free to molest Noah?" Sebastian just laughs, but what shocks Kurt is Puck, leaning against the bathroom door who says,

"Anytime you want, Princess."

Kurt squeaks, burrowing his face into Sebastian's shaking shoulder. When he can't contain his laughs, Seb gets a pinch to the side. "Sorry! Sorry! It was just great timing." Turning to Puck, Sebastian says, "We've been setting boundaries. Apparently, as long as we don't intend to cheat, it's not cheating." He quickly looks back down at Kurt. "Not that I want you testing that theory. No texting with other guys. Not like that. Just because it isn't technically cheating, doesn't mean you should be doing it."

Kurt giggles, "Duly noted."

Puck just shakes his head. He steps over to the corner the bed used to be in and grabs his guitar. He pulls out the vanity chair and sits down. Sebastian and Kurt take the cue to sit up, Kurt leaning back against Sebastian's chest again. "Okay, so this is embarrassing to do in front of Bowser, but I'm assuming that outside of bathroom trips, he's not leaving your side."

Sebastian quips, "Actually, I've had to pee for like three hours."

Kurt slaps him, knowing that's not true. He had sadly been very aware of the trips to the bathroom, as it had been the only time they'd been apart. "Shut up, Noah."

"You first, Princess. Like I was saying. This is embarrassing, but I'd been planning to sing this to Kurt for weeks, and it sums up how I feel pretty well. In case you don't know it, Seb, we tend to sing our feelings, not actually talk about it. Which is how you caught me singing Christina fucking Aguilera. Blame Mr. Shue."

At the last second, Puck looks up at Sebastian and mutters, "Obviously, this is not a love confession. As much as I love Kurt, I know he's not mine. He never really was." He glances to Kurt, "I'm not sure if I'm in love with you or not. I do know you're the closest I've ever come to it. This song is like... symbolic and shit. I'd go to New York if I could, but we both know there's nothing there for me. So..."

Coughing, Puck ignores his embarrassment and starts to pick at his guitar. Sebastian recognizes, it but it's not until Puck starts to sing that he places it. He sings 'Wherever You Will Go' by The Calling. _Apparently I'm not the only one with a soft spot for the 90's/early 2000's. Kurt totally has a type._

Puck glances to Sebastian during the parts about finding someone new to take care of him, but his eyes are undeniably on Kurt during the song. _Okay, so now I get the warning. It does seem a little, 'I'll be in the bushes' if it's out of context. But come on, it's Puck. Of course he knows Kurt will be fine. He's just reminding him that he'll miss him. Like Kurt could forget._

When he's done, Kurt smiles sadly. He waits for Puck to put the guitar down before opening his arms so Puck can lean down to hug him. After a full minute with no end in sight, Sebastian just lays back down, waiting for them to finish. When they do, Puck gives Kurt a quick kiss to the temple and stands up to leave.

Sebastian tugs Kurt down to lay beside him, having already scooted back as far as he could. When Kurt settles against him, Sebastian gives Puck a pointed look, still holding the blankets open for him. Kurt just smiles, making no comment, even though they hadn't talked about it. Noah looks like he's about to cry. "W-what?"

Sebastian just rolls his eyes, propping his head up on one hand, the other still holding the blanket up. "I get it. I was never lucky enough to find a friend like Kurt, but I can imagine if I did. I wouldn't have been as nice about all this as you have been. It's fine. Get in the damn bed, I'm tired.

Noah wants to point out that he's only wearing basketball shorts, which he'd actually planned to lose when he got to Finn's room. And that Kurt is still just wearing the dance shorts and sweater, which is basically just the sweater. Even Sebastian had lost the shirt, now only wearing Finn's borrowed sweatpants. He wants to make arguments about how they're dating now. In love now. Seb should come first.

Instead he just dives into the bed, curling around Kurt's back and pressing his nose to the nape of his neck. They all shift a little, eventually settling with Kurt tucked under Seb's chin, arms curled in front of him, pressed between their chests and his head resting on Puck's folded arm. Sebastian has one arm splayed above them and the other curled in front of him, holding one of Kurt's hands. Puck has the arm not under Kurt wrapped over him, his hand settled on Seb's waist, because it was that or between their bodies, and that would be weirder. Their legs are a jumbled mess that no one feels like sorting.

Despite their best efforts to stay awake, hoping to stretch their last hours, soon all three of them are asleep.

* * *

 

[Kurt]

Kurt is suddenly woken up by a loud scream.

"You've **got** to be kidding me! Not this again!"

Kurt jolts awake, arms flailing a little. He gasps when his arm connects with something that starts cussing at him. Eventually opening his eyes, he sees Sebastian glaring at him, holding an already bruised cheek. "Really, Peach? On the same side?"

Kurt squeaks, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hit you at all!"

Noah grunts out, "Shut up. And stop moving, I'm trying to sleep." and tries to cuddle closer to Kurt's back.

They all jump a little when a throat is cleared at the foot of the bed. Kurt turns to look, very slowly.

Burt Hummel stands with his arms crossed, making a very pissed off, and slightly disbelieving face.

Kurt squeaks again, only then looking around to notice that the blanket is gone and the sheet has slipped off of Noah completely, barely covering Kurt's crotch and only hiding Sebastian's bottom half. _Well that's not good. Sebastian looks naked, I look like I'm not wearing pants, and Noah... is Noah._

Groaning, Kurt turns back to his dad. "We're all wearing pants! Or shorts, same thing!"

Burt just huffs. "I don't want to know. I really don't. But it's almost 8, we have to leave in an hour. You need to get ready and those two need to get out of my house. Especially now." Burt walks off, mumbling to himself, something about 'where does Kurt find these guys' and 'how does this keep happening to me?'.

As soon as he's gone, Sebastian breaks down into laughter. Kurt pouts, but is overruled when Noah also starts chuckling.

Kurt lets out a gusty sigh and crawls out of bed, heading to his vanity. He does a quick routine. He's about to spend hours on a plane, it doesn't really matter what he does. Then he packs it all into an overnight bag. He grabs the rest of his clothes from the dresser and closet, packing them in quickly beside his overly expensive toiletry kit. He'd told his dad to wash the ones in his hamper and then just put them in a box.

After making sure the overnight bag is ready, he snaps it down to his bigger suitcase, which he'd packed days ago. He moves on to checking his messenger bag for everything he'll need for his flight before finally standing up and looking around the room.

When he can't put it off any longer, Kurt turns to the bed, facing the two boys watching him sadly. They'd both sat up, and moved to the end of the bed, but hadn't gotten up. Kurt takes a step closer, and Noah gets up first, coming to hug him as tight as he can. After a minute, he pulls away. Kurt hesitates for a second before leaning in to press a quick kiss to Noah's lips. Giving him one more hug before letting him go. Noah sniffs suspiciously before moving to the bathroom, shutting the door.

Kurt can feel tears welling in his eyes as he turns back to Sebastian. As he stands, Seb has to force his knees to hold him up. Leaning in, he wraps his arms around Kurt's shoulders, holding him as close as he can. After a few seconds, he eases himself back, fighting tears every step of the way. Eventually he smiles and says, "I can't believe it took you less than 12 hours to test the cheating concept. You absolute **whore**."

Kurt laughs, tears finally leaking out. "Damn it, Bas. I was doing so well! I didn't want to cry." He grabs Sebastian by the neck, pulling him back in, kissing from his jaw up to his ear and then over to his mouth.

When Kurt hears a throat clear again, he panics, pulling back and looking for his dad. Instead he sees Noah, stepping back out of the bathroom. Taking that as his sign to back away before they embarrass themselves worse, Kurt just smiles, still holding Sebastian's hand. "I need to get down there before he comes after me. That's a conversation no one wants to have. As it is, the drive to Dayton is going to be a very **long** one. I'll have to tell him about us now, Bas."

"I already figured that out, Peach. It's fine. He's going to realize it when I'm sobbing like a girl downstairs anyway." Since Sebastian is actually the only one of them not yet crying, Kurt decides to resent him for this statement.

Sighing, Kurt turns to Noah. "Will you carry my suitcase down? I'm going to be hauling it enough and Sebastian can't see through his tears."

With a watery laugh, Noah moves to grab it. "Sure, Princess."

Noah moves down the stairs first, shortly followed by Kurt, still pulling Sebastian along behind him. When they move to walk outside, Kurt just shakes his head. "Nope. You guys have to stay in here. If you follow me to the car, I'm not going. So just... stay here." He gives Noah one more quick hug, starting to feel ridiculous but not denying that he's stalling. He turns and gives Sebastian one more kiss, and a tight squeeze, then he's moving to the door, pulling his luggage with him. At the door, he turns one more time, smiling at them.

Noah says, "Just so you know, as soon as you leave, I'm going to steal your boyfriend for tear soaked cuddles."

Kurt can see that Sebastian is relieved he won't have to be the one that asks, and he just smiles, "I always knew you were a cuddle-slut, Noah. This isn't news to me." He blows them a kiss and then steps outside before he can give them **another** fucking hug. Without turning, he calls over his shoulder, "I love you guys. Noah, keep your fucking phone charged and on. Bas, don't let Noah talk you into naked cuddles. Especially on Dad's couch."

Kurt can hear laughter in two tones from behind him and see his dad's horrified face. He steps up to the car.

_I'll be okay. I can handle this. I'm a Hummel._

* * *

 

Kurt has possibly the most awkward morning of his life. After the over emotional scene he'd made when leaving, he'd spent the majority of the hour drive to Dayton telling his father about his love life. He'd never really liked keeping secrets, so he's glad he's able to finally come clean. He tells Burt about how him and Noah had remained just friends, despite his worries.

Then he had to tell him about Sebastian. He admitted that they were just fooling around for most of the summer. That he had liked Sebastian and thought that was the most he could get from him. He pointed out that, at 18, only two sexual partners is still a good record. And he'd loved them both. Burt grudgingly agreed, but still asked why he couldn't have held off another ten years or so.

Kurt had told him about how he and Sebastian had made stupid assumptions on the level of Jane Austen novels. He'd even, after swearing him to secrecy on pain of death, told him about Sebastian's mother. That had softened Burt up a bit about the whole thing. He told him they were going to try a long-distance relationship and that Sebastian would be going to NYU next year. He'd also assured him he was kidding about the naked cuddles warning. Mostly.

Burt handled it all very well. More resigned than anything. Kurt got the distinct impression that he was just relieved that he hadn't actually walked in on the aftermath of his son's threesome. Kurt giggled at the thought.

As they sat down to breakfast, Kurt talked about anything other than boys. His dad deserved one last meal together, without Kurt making it all about them. They talked about where all Kurt was applying, both for schools and work. He talked about how excited he was to see Rachel again. How he couldn't wait to go apartment hunting with her. He was slightly worried that she wouldn't want to move out of her dorm, she sounded so happy there. But hopefully living with Kurt would have it's own benefits. Gourmet coffee, for one. Well, once Burt shipped the coffee machine.

When they pulled up outside the airport, Kurt has a brief moment where he wonders if he can really do this. He'd saved up all summer, and he knew that as long as he got a job and a decent apartment in the next two or three weeks, he'd be fine. He'd said proper goodbyes to all of his friends. The ones that had left for college far away, he'd seen when they left. Last weekend he'd met up with Blaine and David, still going strong, despite the long drive from OSU. He'd seen Sam, going over to his house when they'd settled, taking them a gift basket of baked goods, stuffed into a familiar basket that had made Sam almost fall off the couch laughing.

As he looked back at his dad, waving at the door of the airport, Kurt realizes that he's really going. He's going to start a new life, in a new city, with a new boyfriend that he won't even be able to see. Swallowing nervously, he turns and heads through the doors.


	20. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, as mentioned, this part is weird. It will jump from covering months, or days, in detail to years. I really only wrote it for me lol. If it annoys you, feel free to consider the last chapter the end and make up your own. =)   
> Thanks for reading! This was nerve wracking and I don't think I can do this again! lol  
> Also thank you to everyone that read and reviewed in the day its taken me to post this! I was actually really anxious about posting, so thank you so much!

Kurt and Rachel found a nice, if badly located, apartment. They moved to Bushwick. Kurt was amazed when he got a job at Vogue.com. He loved it, his boss loved him, and he couldn't be happier there. Isabelle had almost immediately fallen in love with Kurt and his fashion sense. She'd let him do things no intern should be allowed, and even urged him to go into fashion, despite his plans for NYADA.

Sebastian spent the first months keeping as busy as he could. He'd stepped down as head of the Warblers, but had started to regret it when Hunter took over. At first, he'd just trained them, trying to get them to step up their dance moves. Sebastian's first real dilemma had come when Hunter had shown up with steroids, insisting everyone take them. He'd been trying to talk to Kurt about it for two days, but he'd been so busy that Sebastian barely heard from him. When he did, Kurt was talking about his own stuff and his new job. Sebastian hadn't had the heart to put his stupid high school drama on him.

It all came to a head when Sebastian got a call from Sam, asking if he'd heard from Kurt. He was starting to get worried because he had never called Blaine, Sam, or David back. That night, when Sebastian Skyped Kurt, he couldn't get a word in edgewise. When Kurt had finally stopped to take a breath from telling him about Rachel's new makeover, Sebastian had tried to talk to him about the Warblers. Sensing that Kurt wasn't really paying attention, Sebastian had casually said, "So, we're starting the shots next weekend. I don't think Trent will go through with it. So he'll be kicked off the team. I might become impotent, but at least I'll be hot as fuck right?"

Kurt had responded with, "Bas, you're already hot as fuck... wait, what? What's going on?"

Sebastian had explained again. After many long minutes of high pitched shrieking, when Sebastian had just put his laptop down and went to get a drink, Kurt finally calmed down enough to bite out, "Sebastian Smythe, if you even **think** about taking those shots I will never Skype with you again. If you actually **do** it, I'll fly to Ohio to dump you in person, so that I can kick you in your shriveled up balls."

Once Kurt became a rational person again, Sebastian had told him he was going to leave an anonymous tip for the Headmaster at Dalton, and get Hunter removed from the Warblers. Then he'd spent 20 minutes dressing Kurt down for being so wrapped up in his own life that he was ignoring his friends. They eventually decided that Kurt would, every other day, spend ten minutes texting people back, even if it was just to say, "I'm fine, just busy, tty asap".

Once Kurt started to pay attention to what was going on back home, he'd been surprised to find out that Noah had been coming over to Sebastian's house on Friday nights. After Kurt had left, they had bonded over missing him, and after a late night of sitting around with Noah telling Sebastian some of Kurt's more embarrassing stories, they'd fallen asleep. Both needing the contact and not being able to get it from Kurt, they'd formed the habit of sleeping in bed together, the way Kurt used to.

After Sebastian had told Kurt, they started the habit of having a Skype date on Fridays. Noah would usually come in at the end and talk with Kurt for a few minutes. As lonely as Kurt was in New York without them, he was really glad that they were able to comfort each other. Noah didn't need the support as much anymore but Kurt had been a little worried about leaving Sebastian on his own.

Kurt talked to Noah every other day for the first month or so, eventually tapering off to a long phone call on Tuesdays. Noah was mostly happy. He liked his job, and he got to see Beth often. He even met his brother through Mr. Shue. He got to know Jake pretty well, since he lived in town. He told Jake he could drop by the garage after school. He even taught him to work on cars. Puck wanted Jake to go to college and get out of Lima, if that's what he wanted, but knowing a trade was never a bad back-up.

Kurt had, for the most part, adjusted well to New York. It had been rough on him and Sebastian, especially at first. Once Kurt figured out how to balance work and his personal life, things settled down a lot. His job was amazing, and he was starting to wonder if he should even apply for NYADA, or just go full steam ahead in fashion.

When Finn had finally turned up, Kurt didn't know what to do. His loyalty was divided. He loved Finn, and he honestly believed that he and Rachel were perfect together. But Finn was acting like a child. He had hidden himself away for months, refusing to get in contact with anyone, and then thrown a fit about what had happened in his absence. When they had broken up, Kurt had begrudgingly agreed that it was the right decision. Until Finn figured out what he wanted out of life, it wasn't fair to disrupt Rachel's.

After two months in New York, Kurt had mostly figured out his own life. He would apply to NYADA, as planned and was calling Sebastian everyday and Skyping with him twice a week. The phone calls were sometimes only a few seconds, but it worked. The Friday Skype session was as mandatory as his family dinners used to be, even if they tended to start much later. It was his only chance to see Noah and catch up with everything he'd missed that week with Sebastian. It also left Saturday open for just webcam sex. Since they'd just talked the day before, on Saturday they were usually already stripping before the call went through.

It had actually taken until the end of October before Sebastian had convinced his père to fund a ticket to New York. They'd spent the whole weekend before Halloween together. Mostly in bed. Sebastian hadn't even gone out to see New York. When Kurt had protested, Sebastian pointed out that next year he'd be living there. The city could wait, he'd come to see Kurt.

Finn, after leaving New York, had gone home to Ohio. He'd taken over for Mr. Shue so he could go to D.C. When he finally accepts that he and Rachel are over, he decides to concentrate on teaching.

As good as everything was going, long-distance was starting to take it's toll by Thanksgiving. Despite having sectionals, Sebastian still arranged to come to New York for the weekend. All Seb had been able to think about while singing was seeing Kurt that night. He'd sang the solos, but his head wasn't really in it. It was only after his flight touched down in New York that he found out they won. By default, but screw it. They'd practiced, rehearsed, and trained. They **did** deserve it. At least they hadn't had to drug themselves for it. Little did he know, he'd eventually go on to win nationals. He had other things to worry about at the moment.

By the time he got to Kurt's apartment, the only people who hadn't shown up for dinner were himself and Kurt's boss, who had been dying to meet him for weeks. She'd seen Kurt be equal parts gushy and sad over the absent boyfriend and really wanted to meet him. After singing their song together, ignoring the very confused Sebastian and Brody, Isabelle had caught them making out on the fire escape. Refusing to acknowledge the awkwardness, she had called them sweet.

When Kurt went to Rachel's winter showcase, the last thing he'd expected was to be asked to sing. He'd thrown all of his emotion about missing Sebastian into the song, and nailed it. He was still shocked when he got accepted, but excited to finally start college. He still hadn't really decided what he wanted to do for the rest of his life.

Rachel convinced Finn to keep glee club going. The seniors had been kind of screwed, but no one really blamed Marley. Everyone understood the seriousness of what could have happened to her. Instead they continued to meet up wherever they could.

When Christmas came, Kurt was saddened to find out that going home would be pointless. He had no desire to see drunken family members and Sebastian had gone to Paris to visit his grandmother. Despite his claims that he'd wanted to take him there last summer, no offer had been made and Kurt couldn't bring himself to ask. It was way too expensive to afford himself.

He'd resigned himself to the worst Christmas since his mom died. Just as he'd accepted it, Burt had shown up with a tree. He should have known the bad news was around the corner. Burt assured Kurt that the cancer was almost always curable, but that didn't stop the gut clenching fear. It had turned out fine, of course, but it was still a scary thought.

When Kurt had gone to get his 'present', Sebastian had scared the shit out of him. Not being happy enough to surprise him, he'd jumped out at him and grabbed his shoulders. After smacking him for a solid 30 seconds, Kurt had burst into tears, clinging to him. Not knowing if the tears were from being happy to see him or upset about his dad, Sebastian had just held him tightly. He'd murmured that his père was watching out for Burt and that Sebastian had started sleeping in Kurt's room, with Puck, on weekends to keep an eye out. He'd also brought Kurt a new pack of coffee cups.

Kurt had felt horrible that Sebastian had gotten him a Christmas present until he opened it. "Oh. Wow. A t-shirt. You really shouldn't have." Kurt's deadpan voice had made Sebastian laugh.

"Actually, Burt told me about your mom. The whole scent thing. I wore that for awhile so it would smell like me. Don't worry, I didn't like, work out in it. You can seal it in a bag or something. It sounded less weird until just this moment." Kurt was actually extremely touched, it **was** weird, but he missed everything about Sebastian, so having something that smelled like him was perfect.

Noah's Christmas had been no less emotion-inducing. He'd bravely decided to get his mom to sit down to dinner with Jake and 'the waitress'. If he'd known that the insane women would bond over their mutual hatred of the man they'd had children with, he might have reconsidered. But at least he'd gotten to spend the holidays with his brother.

* * *

 

When Kurt had started at NYADA, he'd been worried about making friends. He didn't have glee to fall back on anymore. He'd thought about joining a group there, but the leader of it had hit on him pretty hard, and not wanting to have the, 'No thanks! I'm taken!' talk, Kurt had just avoided him.

Luckily, Kurt had Santana and Rachel at home. He'd become closer to Santana than he'd ever thought he could. Their bitchiness had actually seemed to mellow each other out. Rachel couldn't take the snark. Luckily, Santana just reminded Kurt of his missing boyfriend, and he kind of loved her for that.

When she had told Finn about Brody, Kurt had tried to be mad about it. He still didn't really believe in violence... but Brody had deserved to get his ass kicked. So he let it go. It just proved to him that Finn would always put Rachel above everything else. After the sectionals fiasco, Finn had decided to go to college and study to become a teacher. The school he went to wasn't the best, but he was hoping by keeping his grades up, he could transfer to a school in New York in a year or two. When he'd heard about Brody, he'd left college just to fly up and take care of him for her. It was exactly the kind of gesture that melted Kurt into a pile of goo.

When Kurt went home to get Burt's results from the doctor, Noah asked if he could crash on his couch for awhile. Shelby had moved to New York, and taken Beth with her. Burt needed to cut back his traveling for awhile, so he would be sticking around for a bit. He couldn't really handle crawling under cars, but he could take over the office stuff. Noah had arranged for Jake to come in and help with the back up on the weekends. He figured he'd give himself six months. Noah had always dreamed of getting out of Lima, and this seemed like the perfect time to give it a shot.

Kurt had agreed, and Noah had moved to New York, staying with Kurt and getting a job at a diner with Santana and Rachel, where he'd also met Dani. Kurt had considered getting a job there too, but when he'd discussed it with Isabelle, she'd agreed to hire him for what he would have made there if he could be there for more regular hours.

Shortly after getting the job at the diner, Noah decided to start a band. He didn't really have any set plans for New York, so he figured starting a band would be his best chance at staying out of Ohio. He'd held auditions and met Elliot 'Starchild' Gilbert. Noah had been reminded of Kurt in some of glee's more out there performances, a connection Kurt had not appreciated. He'd agreed to let him into the band immediately but had asked him to tone it down just a little, which Elliot had totally understood.

The band had started out with Noah, Santana, Rachel, Dani, and Elliot. After Rachel threw a diva fit and left the apartment, Noah had kicked out both Santana and Rachel and Kurt had joined. Things with the band were actually going very well. Noah had broken up a fight in a club only to find out later that the douchey kid about to get his ass kicked was the nephew of a talent scout. When Noah had taken the stupid kid home, he'd been thanked by a distraught mother, and she had given him her brother's number.

He was still deciding if he should call the number when Sebastian turned up in New York. After he'd graduated, Seb had wasted no time in moving. Luckily Rachel hadn't moved back into the apartment yet, so it was just the three of them.

Having Sebastian in New York was a hard adjustment to make after almost a year apart, but Kurt and Seb couldn't get enough of each other. They knew when school started he'd be moving into the dorms at NYU, so any brief moments of claustrophobia were pushed aside. Noah spent so much of his time outside of the house, just enjoying New York and it's night life, that Kurt and Sebastian had plenty of time to themselves.

When Sebastian had been back in Ohio, he'd wondered if Elliot was hitting on Kurt. Considering how long it had taken Kurt to notice that Sebastian was staring at his ass, he'd worried that Kurt was just oblivious. From the few pictures he'd seen, Elliot was pretty hot... What no one really saw coming was the obvious attraction Elliot had shown for Sebastian. When they had first met, Elliot had stared so hard that Kurt had slapped him on the arm, laughing. Sebastian was relieved and more than a little amused by the whole thing. It had actually become a bit of a joke and Kurt would tease Elliot mercilessly about it.

Kurt was equally exasperated by the obvious ogling of his boyfriend and the smugness coming off of Sebastian in waves any time Elliot was around. At first he'd made a comment about how if Elliot thought he could handle the smirky bastard, he was welcome to him. But Elliot's reaction stopped that pretty quickly. He's not sure how it happened, but anytime they all got together, Kurt found himself plastered to Seb's side or sitting in his lap. Well, Kurt had never claimed to be subtle.

After a couple weeks, Sebastian had finally taunted Puck about the scout enough that he was goaded into calling the number on the card. The man had been surprised to hear from him after so long but had agreed to come to a show next week. He'd thanked Noah for saving his idiot nephew but explained that he wouldn't sign a band with no talent. He'd give them half an hour to impress him before he gave them a pat on the head and went on with his life.

The band had fought, and eventually decided that the guy probably wouldn't show. He sounded like an ass, just like the kid Puck had almost hit himself. They played the gig and tried not to guess if any of the people in the audience could be him. After the show they'd been approached by a surprisingly small man with a bitchface to rival Kurt's. He'd told them that they were all wonderful and given them a business card with a private number scrawled on the back. "Call that number to set up a formal audition. We would sign any of you, if tonight was any indication. Decide what you want to do, group or solo and then give us a call." And then he'd walked away. It was an interesting mix of 'You're awesome!' and 'I couldn't really care less!'.

Kurt decided, after chewing his nails down to nubs, that what he really wanted was to finish NYADA. He'd said that if the other guys made it big, he could always call in a favor later or something. Elliot had laughed and agreed wholeheartedly, but Noah had barely managed an uncomfortable smile. His time was long since up. He'd actually been in New York for almost seven months. He had been considering moving home, convinced nothing was happening. Now he was confused and dismayed by his reaction to being 'discovered'.

In the end, Noah realized that he didn't really want to be a rockstar anymore. He'd moved to New York to make it big, to see Beth grow up, and to be with Kurt again. Instead what he'd found was that Kurt had moved on. He was the same guy; still amazing, still perfect in almost everything he did. But he didn't need Noah anymore. Especially with Sebastian there, Kurt seemed very happy and excited to start his life with Seb, now that they could be together.

Beth was a toddler now. She wasn't a baby, she was turning into an actual person. As she got older, Puck was more and more surprised by how much like Quinn she was. He got to see her as often as he wanted, but he didn't actually feel the need to be there anymore. Shelby loved her new job, she got to spend all day with her daughter and call it work. He had started to visit less and less, not because he didn't love her, but because it seemed like he wasn't really needed. She was never really his daughter, no matter how much he loved her.

And now he had this card. He could call it. He could become a rockstar, probably. He could have that dream that all little boys want. The screaming fans, the money, the fame. He could have it all. So why did he want to run home to Lima and fix cars with his brother? Kurt had sat him down and asked him if he was just scared of it. Maybe what he really wanted was the fame and he was just afraid to go for it. Puck had considered that for about 30 seconds before scoffing. He could call the number right now, he wasn't afraid to. He just didn't want it.

In the end, he'd given the card to Elliot and told him to go for it. He'd hugged Kurt, fist bumped Sebastian and gone home. Burt had even let him move in to Kurt's old room, but he paid rent. Burt was just happy to have him back so he could get back to D.C. He'd even have someone to watch the house now.

Blaine had gone to UCLA, to be closer to his brother. He and Dave had broken up a few weeks before Blaine graduated. They'd tried to stay friends, but it was too awkward. They had both managed to stay close to Kurt and Sebastian though. They joked that maybe they'd hook up at Kurt and Seb's wedding, when that day came.

After Sebastian moves into the NYU dorms and Rachel moves back into the apartment, life is much simpler. Kurt misses having Seb there in the mornings before school, but appreciates the space. Sebastian has trouble adjusting to his work load. He admits that he probably bit off more than he can chew, but he wants to get started on law school as soon as he can. NYADA is only a four year school, and they don't know what will happen when Kurt graduates.

Finn had managed to pull a good enough GPA to transfer to New York, where he was still attempting to get a degree in education. He'd moved into the dorm at a small college but had only told his family. Kurt was sworn to secrecy. Finn didn't want to pressure Rachel, and was trying to concentrate on school. He couldn't really handle her drama at the moment.

It was a good thing too, because Rachel, after being cast in Funny Girl, had turned into a total diva. The same night as his fight with Rachel about quitting school, Kurt had attempted to stop a gay bashing. He might have been able to handle one attacker, but not both of them. Sebastian had been a sobbing wreck for hours before Kurt had opened his eyes. After the shock had worn off, and Kurt had woken up, Sebastian refused to admit he'd cried. He also wouldn't call Kurt anything other than 'Braveheart' for a week after he'd overheard Burt and Kurt's conversation.

Despite Seb technically living in the dorms, he'd ended up spending half his time at Kurt's place. During the week, they had tried to spend time apart. Sebastian had a very heavy work load and Kurt had been trying to squeeze as much experience from his time at NYADA as he could. After only a month, Kurt had been caught talking to Finn on the phone and Rachel had found out he was in the city. The four of them started having dinner together every Sunday night, to ease the awkwardness with Finn and Rachel.

Sebastian and Kurt ended up with a very similar schedule to when they had first lived together in Ohio. The only difference is they also met up for date night on Wednesdays if schoolwork permitted. The first time Sebastian had gone to meet up with Kurt at NYADA was a few weeks after the bashing. When he'd walked in, it was to find Kurt, shirtless and wielding what looked like a metal plumbing pipe and a shield, clearly practicing a sword fight. Sebastian had just leaned against the wall, watching Kurt's new muscles flex.

Seb wasn't blind, he'd seen the changes slowly taking over Kurt since he'd moved to New York. He wasn't a total gym rat, the way Sam was, but he did crunches and pushups most mornings and wasn't afraid to walk or take the stairs when he went out. Thanks to Burt's heart problems, he'd eaten healthy for years. He just stuck to it a bit more strictly now. Sebastian had been nothing but pleased by this turn of events. His boyfriend was sexy before, in the feminine, slightly prissy way. Now he was just hot as fuck. He still wore the prissy clothes sometimes, but for the most part, New York and working at Vogue.com had taught him how to wear 'boy clothes' and still be fashionable.

Most college freshman worry about gaining weight, and actually, Seb had assumed he would. He hated working out, so without lacrosse and the training he'd been doing for the Warblers, he was prepared to put on a few. He hadn't anticipated how much fun it was to watch Kurt sweat. Thanks to Kurt's healthy lifestyle and the fact that he liked to have sex when he was pumped with endorphins, it wasn't hard at all to convince Seb to tag along to the gym on Sunday afternoons.

As Sebastian had stood there, watching the last ten minutes of class, he'd been amused to see the group of four or five guys crowding around Kurt. The guy he'd been practicing with was standing a little too close and being a little too obvious, so Sebastian figured it was time to let the guy know that he had no chance whatsoever. Once the class was dismissed, cocky smirk in place, Sebastian had stepped forward.

"Hey, babe. Ready to go?"

Kurt had turned, smiling. "Bas! I thought you would just meet me outside, let me grab my hoodie."

Kurt had slipped the jacket on, stepping up to Sebastian to kiss him quickly. Sebastian had put a hand on his hip, asking, "So, this class is...?"

Grinning, Kurt said, "Stage Combat. I'm actually learning how to use sai swords. It's freaking amazing. Hang on, I'll show you. We have time, Rachel is rehearsing late tonight. We have the loft to ourselves until midnight." As Kurt goes to walk away, Sebastian slaps his ass, saying,

"Like that really matters. I've never cared if she heard us or not."

Kurt mutters, "Sure, you wouldn't. You're not the one she hears." Seb snorts, it already being common knowledge that Kurt can't hold back, no matter how hard he tries. Kurt walks back toward him slowly, swinging the swords impressively.

Sebastian smiles widely, "That's pretty badass. I'm going to tell Puck to get you a set for Christmas. Now come on, you look like you need a shower and I'm more than happy to take another one."

Kurt passed the swords to the guy standing next to him, not noticing his crestfallen pout. "Sounds like a plan. And yes, definitely have Noah get me swords. Beats the hell out of what he sent last Christmas. I thought dad was going to die."

Sebastian laughs at the memory, wrapping an arm around Kurt's shoulder, "Burt's face was priceless. But yeah, the less he knows about our sex life, the better." Sebastian had leaned in, whispering, "Not that trying the different positions wasn't a lot of fun. We still need to try page 37."

Kurt had laughed, slapping him before grabbing his bag. "Oh no. We might try that on your birthday or something, but it won't be while I'm having to take my shirt off for class. I'm not explaining the bruises."

After Kurt had put his arm around Sebastian's waist and started pulling him out of the room, Seb had finally pointed out, "You kind of forgot about your friends there, babe. You didn't even introduce me." Kurt had jolted, looking back at the guys, most of which had raised eyebrows. The obvious exception was Sir Leersalot, who looked **very** put out. Before Kurt could do the polite thing and apologize, Seb said, "Nevermind, you can do it next week. I'm going to start picking you up here on Fridays. Any excuse to see you half naked."

Kurt knew what Sebastian was doing. He wasn't exactly subtle, but Kurt had just gone with it. The possessiveness wasn't unwelcome, Sebastian had never really been like that before. Not outwardly. He'd been kind of stupidly awesome about Noah, and all of his other friends. It felt kind of nice to be able to inspire jealousy. After that day, Sebastian had started to go to NYADA on Fridays. He never went back to his dorm until Monday morning, before class.

On Rachel's opening night, everyone gathered in the loft. After Santana had talked her down from her ledge, it looked like everything was going to be fine. After the show, Finn had given her a kiss that blew right past congratulatory.

* * *

 

After that, their lives had changed so drastically and so often, that it was hard to keep up. One minute Rachel was gushing over her Fanny Brice reviews, the next she was back in Lima, licking her wounds and dodging Finn's calls the same way he'd done to her when he'd failed. One minute Sebastian and Kurt were as happy as they could be, and the next it was Kurt's senior year and he and Seb had broken up over a stupid fight.

Kurt had spent the longest three months of his life thinking that him and Sebastian were over. Then he'd come home from class one day to find Seb leaning against his door with the biggest bouquet of roses he'd ever seen. They'd made up, and agreed to just talk to each other more. Shortly after that, Sebastian had moved in. Before the break up, most of this stuff had migrated there anyway and his dorm was really just a place to study before going home.

Finn finished up his teaching degree and was trying to find a job where he thought he could make a difference. After months of searching, he'd come to Kurt and Seb's and vented to them about the lack of funds in most schools and how unfair it was that in a city like New York, there were whole sections of the city that had no arts at all.

Sebastian had sat Finn down after Kurt fell asleep and talked for hours. Eventually he decided to use his trust fund that he'd gotten at 18 to loan Finn enough to start his own after school program for kids. Finn had found a place and turned it into a small school. He, along with occasional cameos from friends when they came to visit, taught kids to sing and dance, and only charged enough to cover expenses, letting some kids in for free.

After Rachel had gotten her head back on straight and went back to NYADA, she started volunteering there, slowly building the trust between her and Finn back up. They started dating soon after, and got married her in senior year.

Kurt, when he graduated NYADA, had spent a lot of time deciding what he wanted to do. He was given a lot of information about where to go next, and he had a few amazing offers, a few of which could lead him anywhere from California to London. In the end, he'd decided to go into fashion. He and Isabelle no longer worked together, but he'd stayed friends with her. With her guidance, he'd gotten into Parsons. He decided to go for his Master's in Fashion Design while Sebastian went to law school.

* * *

 

As Kurt sits in his bedroom, looking through pictures of his life from so long ago, he can't believe how far they'd all come.

Rachel, after graduating NYADA had landed another star-role on Broadway. She had used a lot of her money to help Finn open a bigger school. Finn was the singing coach and director and even though she was busy with her play, Rachel came in to help on weekends. They had put off having kids until after she won her first Tony, which she'd gotten for Jane Austen Sings. They now had a little boy, and were hoping for a girl this time.

David was happily married and living in Columbus. Blaine was divorced but still in California, he'd spent their last phone call gushing about his new boyfriend for so long that Kurt had wanted to stuff his mouth with socks. Santana and Brittany had gotten married when they were 21 and were still insanely happy together. They had moved back to New York, and Brittany became the dance teacher at Hudson Family Studios. Santana had spent a lot of time helping her friends with their dreams before finally figuring out her own. She was now a lead actress in yet another Law and Order spin off. She also taught acting at Finn's school on the weekends.

Burt and Carole decided to retire after Burt had another scary, if minor, heart attack. He'd put almost ten years into being a congressman and almost 30 into the garage. They had moved to upstate New York to be closer to their sons. They'd left he garage to Noah, who'd renamed it Hudmel Tires and Lube. Noah had met a girl about a year after moving back to Lima. She'd brought her piece of crap car in to have it looked at and Noah had fallen for her snark as she bitched about her boss on the phone, not knowing that he could hear her.

They'd only dated for a few months before Noah knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. She was awesome, she loved to cook, and was amazing with kids. She worked as a nanny and had a long line of kids that she was still friends with almost ten years later. She was sweet, and polite when she was happy and cold and sarcastic when pissed. She pampered him enough that despite the work at the garage, he had to buy gym equipment or he'd risk getting fat. She also called him out on his bullshit and wasn't afraid call Kurt for advice on how to get revenge on him.

Actually, she was a bit too close to Kurt, Noah didn't like it. They'd gotten along amazingly well. Kurt loved everything about her and took great pleasure in helping her get back at him. When Burt had moved to New York, Noah had bought their house. He'd always loved the way it was built and it felt like home to him. When he and Michelle had kids, his daughter was given Finn's old room. Seeing it covered in pink and dolls still amused Noah. His son had taken Kurt's. It had actually been Kurt who'd first asked, on a visit when the smallest Puckerman was 5, if Noah realized that his son was singing show tunes. Kurt would never stop finding it funny that Noah's son was gay. Despite jokes about that room being cursed, Noah was happy. He loved his wife and his children were amazing.

If only he could get them to stop fighting over the bathroom.

Sam had taken over the New Directions when the school had been transformed. Years later, he'd married the woman that coached the Troubletones. They had no kids yet, but they were trying. Jake Puckerman had taken over Duly Noted.

Kurt himself had decided, after graduating Parsons, that what he really wanted was his own clothing label. He'd been making his own clothes since high school, and he loved doing it. He'd eventually produced his own line and had presented at fashion week, with a little help from his contacts at Vogue. He still lived in New York, and now **his** name was being thrown around by effeminate gay boys in Ohio.

Sebastian had graduated law school and joined a prestigious firm. His père had also moved closer after retiring, and Kurt had eventually met his Grand-mère. Despite Sebastian's warnings, Kurt had loved her and the feeling was mutual. They go to visit her every summer. She isn't getting around as well as she used to, but she was tough and was still strong and bitchy.

On Sebastian's 21st birthday, they had all gone out as a group to a karaoke bar. Sebastian, Finn and Rachel had watched, laughing as Kurt, Brittany and Santana had performed 'Single Ladies', as a dare from Finn. When they had finished, before Kurt could leave the stage, Sebastian had gone up and proposed to him. It was only later that Kurt had found out Sebastian had been carrying the ring around for a month, trying to get the balls to ask.

Kurt and Sebastian had gotten married when Kurt was 23. At that point they decided that after everything they'd been through and all the years put in, they couldn't continue to call each other just 'boyfriends'. They were so much more. So, even though they thought they were too young and would probably regret it, they'd married. At their wedding rehearsal, Sebastian had gotten up to give a speech. He'd thanked Finn for being his best man and had told everyone that he had a surprise for his lovely bride-to-be and **his** best man. The glare he'd gotten for the bride comment was nothing compared to the horrified looks on both Kurt and Puck's faces when the grainy cell phone video on a large screen started. At the opening strains of 'Ain't No Other Man', Sebastian stepped out of arm's reach of Kurt. The video showed the whole routine, with Kurt dancing around and singing, only wearing a t-shirt. Kurt still married him, but Sebastian stood at the altar with a few bruises.

They fought constantly, always bitching and snarking at each other. They were too honest, and too open. They both spent years thinking their next fight would be their last. Before they realized it, Kurt was turning 30. They'd been married for almost seven years, and were happy. Kurt still didn't know when it happened or how he didn't notice it.

When Kurt had sat Sebastian down to ask him about maybe finding a surrogate, he didn't know what to expect. They had only discussed having kids in the vaguest of terms. He was surprised to find Sebastian just as excited about it as he was. Seb eventually admitted that he'd wanted to bring it up for awhile but thought Kurt was too busy at work. Kurt had smacked him.

After months of looking for someone who would suit their purposes, they'd been approached by Santana and Brittany. The girls had asked them if they would be open to having kids with them. As two gay couples, they both had things the other needed to have kids, and frankly, they were all too busy to be full time parents. They had eventually decided to have a baby and basically arrange it like a divorced couple. Kurt and Sebastian would take the kid for a week, and then trade off. They had the added advantage of not actually being exes so they worked together well. Each family had a spare room that was for the other couple. They spent all holidays together, trading off who's house it would be at. It was weird, and confusing, and hard to explain. But it worked.

Kurt and Brittany had a beautiful little girl, who they'd named Elizabeth Susan Hummel-Smythe. The last name was a bit of a problem, but since Kurt and Seb had hyphenated and Kurt was undoubtedly the most responsible, it just made the most sense. Sebastian had worked out the paperwork so legally Kurt and Brittany were her parents but that Sebastian and Santana would take over their partner's legal rights if something happened to them.

They'd made the same arrangement for Santana and Sebastian when their son was born. Stephan William Hummel-Smythe was just as loved and spoiled as his sister. Both children were actually trilingual. Sebastian had only spoken French to his children, while Santana had only spoken Spanish. Kurt and Brittany had both spoken English. They'd heard all their lives that it was easier to learn when they were young, and since both Sebastian and Santana were very proud of their upbringings, it worked well. It was hard, but it became natural. Now they are less strict about it, and the kids often confuse people in the streets by fighting with each other in multiple languages.

Lizzie was energetic and loud, she was tall for her age, but wire thin. She had beautiful blonde hair and glasz eyes. Stephy was surprisingly quiet. When they had first decided to mix Sebastian and Santana's DNA, they were afraid of the demon it would produce, but the little boy with black hair and green eyes was sweet and kind. He laughed freely and had no problems running up and hugging strangers, which was inconvenient for famous parents living in New York.

Kurt is muttering to himself about 'stranger danger' when Sebastian walks into the room. Curious, he walks over to look at the album in Kurt's hands. He laughs when he sees pictures with no order to them, it being a compilation of Liza's favorite pictures, not made meticulously by Kurt like the bigger albums. Sebastian's favorite picture on the page is of the Halloween from college when Puck had come back to visit. Kurt had surprised them all with group costumes. It showed Puck as Mario, Finn as Luigi, Rachel as Princess Daisy, Sebastian as Bowser and Kurt as Princess Peach.

The funniest things about the picture were Sebastian's glare, his costume was the only one that looked ridiculous, Kurt's smug grin, he'd made the perfect princess, and Puck's additions. Puck had decided that since they were going to a party dressed like this, and he wasn't actually with 'Peach', he should emo it up. The Mario in the picture is wearing a black wig under his hat, in an old school Bieber cut, heavy black eyeliner and bandages on his wrists.

Sebastian looks up, laughing. "Oh god. You know we'll have to explain that joke to the kids one day right? We should have hidden that picture."

"Nope. When they ask, I'm calling 'Uncle Puck' and he can deal with it."

Sebastian raises an eyebrow, "Would that really help anything? God knows what he'd tell them."

With a shrug, Kurt gets up, putting the album down on the dresser. "Not my problem, we'll just have to make sure it's on a night they're headed back to Britt and Tana's. Speaking of which, don't we need to go?"

Seb snorts, "Like it's my fault. I came in here to see what was taking so long for you to dress for a freaking birthday party to find you strolling down memory lane. Don't blame me because you're getting old."

Kurt smiles pleasantly before flicking Sebastian on the nose. "Don't call me old, asshole. Unless you **want** to sleep on the couch tonight?"

Rubbing his nose, Sebastian says, "Shit. You know I didn't mean it... I love you?"

Kurt scoffs, "That stopped working years ago. You should find a new ploy. The love thing is played out." He steps to the closet, grabbing his black silk vest to put on over his bright blue button up shirt. As he's smoothing it out, Sebastian's arms wrap around him.

"How 'bout I point out that with the kids gone, we'll have the house to ourselves and we can finally christen the new couch in the den?" Despite Sebastian's best efforts at being sexy, Kurt glares.

"Hell no. Do you know how much that thing cost? It's **leather** , Sebastian. Keep your body fluids off of it." Kurt steps away from him, to the mirror. When he's sure he's presentable, he turns back around and giggles at Seb's pout. Sliding his arms around his husband's neck, Kurt whispers in his ear, "Besides, I got something to show you last week when I was in Paris."

Sebastian groaned. Paris meant underwear. The implied message was clear; they wouldn't make it past the foyer. Seb coughed, "Okay! Time to grab the kids and get this moving." Leading a laughing Kurt out of the room by his hand, Sebastian says, "Just so you know, they plan to ambush you. They got Rachel in on it."

Kurt growled, "Why is this my fault? I'm sorry if I'm not being reasonable, but really, no matter what we do, someone is going to be left out."

"I know, Peach, but we've all agreed we want another child. Two more would be too much, we need to figure **something** out."

Kurt snaps out, "I don't see what's so wrong with my idea. Yes, it's a little gross, but it worked for Rachel!" At Sebastian's disgusted glance, Kurt says, "Come on! We can just mix ours up together! Then it's up to chance! We know it has to be Brittany, Santana didn't handle pregnancy well at all. She threw a milkshake, cup and all, at a taxi. She'll end up arrested. Plus she went last time."

Sebastian just sighs, "Is that really going to be your argument? 'It's my turn'? You're not fooling anyone."

"But it's not fair! You had Stephy, I should get the next one." Kurt pouts.

"Babe, we aren't having anymore. It's not 'next one' it's 'last one'. Do you really want Steph to not have any genetic connection to either of his siblings? If I have a baby with Brittany, it would tie us all together."

Kurt huffs, "We're already tied together." But he knows he won't win this. They're right. It wouldn't be fair to any of the kids to do it any other way.

Sebastian smiles, seeing the resignation for what it is. He wraps Kurt in his arms and kisses his forehead. "Don't be sad. It's a baby! It's our baby, all of ours, no matter who's DNA it has. As much as I'd love to see those beautiful eyes looking out at me from another newborn, we really do have to think about what's best for everyone, Peach." As they step into the playroom to get the kids Sebastian adds, "Besides, me and Britt? Imagine the dancing capability."

Huffing, Kurt bends down to scoop up his son. "Come on, Petit Prince. You're mine today. Let's leave Père and the birthday girl and go get you suited up."

With a three year old on his hip, Kurt bends down to kiss the top of his daughter's head. "Happy birthday, Princess. Help Père load the car up, but try not to mess up your dress."

Lizzie says, "Okay Daddy!" and runs to Seb, jumping into his arms. As Sebastian swings the giggling six year old onto his shoulder and struts out the door, Kurt just bounces Stephy and prepares himself mentally for the hell that is 20 screaming young girls.

_It's going to be a long day. And then an even longer night._

 

_**Fin** _


End file.
